Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Reviewing media here always feels like straddling a fence. On one hand, I’m a professional critic, and that’s a lens that never really goes away. On the other hand, when I’m writing or talking at xplainthexmen.com, I’m largely speaking as a fan, to other fans; and my considerations change accordingly. Sometimes, if I’m lucky, those perspectives line up, and everything is smooth sailing.
In which we are not impressed with Extraordinary X-Men (but enjoy its art); and finally weigh in on a recent theatrical release (because you demanded it).
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
(Seriously, though, can we all just take a moment to think about Daveed Diggs as Nightcrawler? -J)
Elle casts Technet (and Alistaire Stuart):
Gatecrasher – Kathy Bates Scatterbrain – Cara Delevingne China Doll – Tristan Risk Ferro – Ray Park Thug – Hornswoggle Alistaire Stuart – Arthur Darvill
It’s your very own printable Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Award for Excellence in X-Cellence! GO, YOU!
Jay knew the Blingee account they had registered to add sparkles to Dazzler covers and photos of Nolan North would come in handy again someday!
THE 2015 SUPER DOCTOR ASTRONAUT PETER CORBEAU AWARDS FOR EXCELLENCE IN X-CELLENCE
Best X-Writer – Dennis Hopeless
Best X-Artist – Mike Norton
Best X-Colorist – Jordie Bellaire
Best Soap Opera – Inferno
Irene Adler Award for Most Anticipated Upcoming Book or Series – X-Men ’92 ongoing
Harvey and Janet Award for Best Walk-On – Falcon Pirate (Wolverines #1)
About Damn Time – Iceman comes out (All-New X-Men #40 and X-Men #600)
Cyclops Has a Good Day Award – Uncanny X-Men #600
Shameless Pandering – X-Men ’92
MetaCorbeau for Exemplary Use of Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau in a Comic Book – Al Ewing (Mighty Avengers #8)
Best Ongoing X-Series – X-Force (w: Si Spurrier; a: various)
Rising Star – Wolverine (Laura Kinney)
Best Withering Sneers* – Kristafer Anka
The Didn’t-Fit-Into-Any-Other-Categories-and-Isn’t-Technically-an-X-Book-but-We-Wanted-to-Give-It-an-Award-Anyway Award – Siege (w: Kieron Gillen, a: Filipe Andrade)
Still the Best Listeners of Any Podcast, Ever – YOU. Again.**
*Kris Anka owns this category so thoroughly that, in the name of fairness, he will be disqualified starting in 2016; at which point the name of this category will officially change to the Kristafer Anka Award for Best Withering Sneer in an X-Book.
**Seriously. We may be a wee bit biased; but honestly, you’re just wildly unfair to the competition.
CLASSIC CORBEAUS (for older X-material covered in the podcast during 2015)
Buried Treasure – Fallen Angels
You Tried – Magneto (New Mutants)
Jack Kirby Award for Best Intersection of Weird and Epic in a Single Character Design – Walter Simonson (Archangel, X-Factor)
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
In which Jay and Miles finally X-Plain some Excalibur; Kyle interviews the X-Perts; Logan gets up-close and personal with the X-Men; Elle casts Excalibur; Chris X-Plains Santa Claus; and you are still the best listeners of any podcast, ever.
X-PLAINED:
Excalibur: The Sword Is Drawn
Christmas at the X-Mansion
The best hair in the Marvel Universe
The not particularly secret origins of Excalibur
Mojoverse anxiety dreams
Warwolves
Meggan
Captain Britain (Brian Braddock)
Sexiest Nightcrawler
Technet (and several of its members)
Gatecrasher
Yap
Omniversal Majestrix Opal Luna Saturnine
The Special Executive
Mutant intersectionality
Why we chose the X-Men
Favorite X-Spinoffs
Our podcast-guest wish list
The theoretical cast of an Excalibur movie
Our ideal X-lineups
Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men
The Second Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence in X-Cellence
Marvel Holiday Special 1991
Santa Claus
The true meaning of Christmas
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In which Apocalypse has always been pretty silly; Cyclops is probably not actually the ‘bad boy’ of the X-Men; Years of Future Past continues to rock; and a lot of Wolverines fight.
REVIEWED:
X-Men: Apocalypse character reveals (00:20)
*Years of Future Past #3 (3:04)
Secret Wars: Battleworld #3 (07:32)
*Pick of the week (10:05)
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 5/31/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
We encourage you to judge this book by its cover. (Nightcrawler #1)
WELL DONE. (Nightcrawler #1)
No idea whether “Boggie” is actually a Bored of the Rings reference, but we’d like to think so. (Nightcrawler #1)
Yowza! (Nightcrawler #1)
We want a vacation home in Dave Cockrum’s brain. (Nightcrawler #1)
AND THEN A SHARK WIZARD HAPPENED. (Nightcrawler #1)
Things about this series that are absolutely delightful: all of them. (Nightcrawler #2)
Boggies X-Plain the plot. (Nightcrawler #2)
OH HELL YES (Nightcrawler #2)
Whoops. (Nightcrawler #2)
Don’t get comfortable! You’ve still got two issues to go! (Nightcrawler #2)
Bamfs are basically terrible sex smurfs. (Nightcrawler #3)
Meen. It’s spelled M-E-E-N. (Nightcrawler #3)
Suuuuuure, we’ve heard that one before. (Nightcrawler #3)
Wellp. (Nightcrawler #3)
X-cellent use of sound effects. (Nightcrawler #3)
Lady Bamfs are ALSO terrible sex Smurfs. (Nightcrawler #4)
CRETACEOUS SAM, WE LOVE YOU. (Nightcrawler #4)
That Illyana Rasputin owns a prodigious collection of pornography is the least surprising revelation of this series. (Nightcrawler #4)
In his defense, she does have extra fancy hair. (Iceman #1)
“You don’t steal another man’s elemental puns!” (Iceman #1)
If we had a dollar for every time this happened… (Iceman #1)
Aw, Bobby. (Iceman #1)
This could definitely not be read as an allegory for anything else ever, right? (Iceman #1)
This is basically how all of our family reunions go, too.
Sneaking in the window, in his underwear (costume, but STILL), carrying an interdimensional projector: kind of the perfect Bobby Drake moment, no? (Iceman #2)
Kiiiinda wishing they’d gone with Freaky Friday instead of Back to the Future, but whatever. (Iceman #2)
I bet at times like this, Bobby seriously questions his choice of superhero costume. (Iceman #2)
Well, that got grim fast. (Iceman #2)
“Man, Marty McFly never had to deal with this shit!” (Iceman #2)
And now, a surreal existential hellscape! (Iceman #3)
Not gonna lie: I love the hell out of this version of the X-Men. (Iceman #3)
NO SERIOUSLY IT’S EVIL PALETTE-SWAPPED ORKO (Iceman #3)
Oblivion X-Plains the story so far. (Iceman #3)
Teenagers, man. (Iceman #3)
Parents: the same in any dimension. (Iceman #4)
Iceman getting universe-defying moments of heroism is rare and pretty much universally awesome. (Iceman #4)
THIS FUCKING MINISERIES, MAN. (Iceman #4)
If we had to sum up Iceman in one image, it’d be this one. (Iceman #4)
The implications for multiversal continuity are kind of staggering. (Iceman #4)
Spoiler: This does not actually change anything. (Iceman #4)
Next Week: X-Men ’92, with Chris Sims and Chad Bowers!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 5/31/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
In which Nightcrawler does Weird Tales; Iceman does Back to the Future; we want a vacation home in Dave Cockrum’s brain; Bamfs are terrible; the 1983 Iceman miniseries is straight-up bananas; parents just don’t understand; and Rachel will take literally any excuse to talk smack about John Ruskin.
X-PLAINED:
Vanisher
Nightcrawler #1-4
Bizarre Adventures #27
Iceman #1-4
The Well at the Center of Time
The downside to hanging out with pirates
A shark wizard in a tiny loincloth
Better living through sound-effect awareness
Boggies
The key to a classic Nightcrawler story
Earth-5311
Bamfs
The full extent of Rachel’s Smurfs knowledge
Cretaceous Sam
Sehv
Illyana Rasputin’s porn collection
The Drake family
An exceptionally unlikely girl next door
The definitive Miles’s Mom anecdote
Marge Smith / Mirage
White Light
Idiot
Kali (but not that one)
Two generations of Officers Ratchit
Pornography no one wants to see
Death by time travel
Oblivion
Night Man (kinda)
Our ideal cross-media adaptations
NEXT WEEK: X-Men ’92, with Chris Sims and Chad Bowers!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Rachel here! ICYMI, they’ve just announced the casting for the three new kids in X-Men: Apocalypse. Let’s take a look:
Sophie Turner as Jean Grey:
Sophie Turner is the only one of the three I’ve seen in anything, ever; and I could not be happier to see her step into Jean Grey’s bright yellow boots. Turner’s a fantastic actress, and Sansa Stark is basically the Jean Grey of Game of Thrones: completely awesome and chronically thrown under the bus by both canon and audience. (Incidentally: talk shit about Sansa stark in the comments, and we will cut you. Sansa rules.)
Alexandra Shipp as Storm:
Totally unfamiliar with Shipp, but she looks like a baby Storm, and she’s not Halle Berry, so that’s two points in her favor.
Tye Sheridan as Cyclops:
With the caveat that I’m no more familiar with this kid than I am with Shipp, can we take a moment to agree that the correct casting for teen Cyclops is and always will be Swing Kids-era Robert Sean Leonard?
They’ll block your optic blasts AND give you +4 to Inscrutable Coolness!
A question we get pretty frequently is “Where did Rachel get those red sunglasses?” The answer–almost universally–is “Which ones?”
I own a lot of red sunglasses–in fact, for a long time, all the sunglasses I owned were red. It’s part homage, part aesthetic preference (red sunglasses are cool, okay?), and part security blanket: Cyclops is a character I identify pretty closely with for a lot of reasons, and the sunglasses have become a pretty central touchstone for that metaphor. (Plus, everyone needs at least one ridiculous visual affectation, right?)
Suffice to say: I’ve gotten really good at hunting down red sunglasses. And this week, I’m going to teach you my secrets.
No, seriously. I own a lot of red sunglasses.
Fair warning: This is gonna get involved. In fact, it’s gonna get involved enough that I decided pretty early on to break it into three parts. Part one will cover the movie versions of Cyclops’s shades. Part two will be a general hunting guide–where and how to search for what you’re after, brands, options, and some personal favorites. And in part three, I’ll point you to real-world matches for specific pairs from the comics. (If you’ve got any requests on that front, drop ’em in the comments here, and I’ll see what I can do!)
I’m starting with the movies because they’re the most precise of the bunch in terms of brands and details (to a point, anyway, but we’ll get into that shortly). With one exception, they’re also the highest-ticket items by a wide margin. Most of the sunglasses you’ll see in the later installments of this guide will hover around or under $20; but these can pretty easily run you upwards of $500, depending on the level of precision and customization you’re after.
Click through for the red lenses of the silver screen! (Includes a very minor spoilers for X-Men: Days of Future Past.)
