Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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As Mentioned in Episode 273 – The Back-End Creep

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Ouch. (Wolverine #85)
Do you think Cable got there early and then waited for someone to say his name so he could make a dramatic entrance? (Wolverine #85)
here is your large adult son (Wolverine #85)
Aw, man, right in the feels. (Wolverine #85)
And again. (Wolverine #85)
I like this cover more than it probably deserves. (Cable #16)
Lang’s tiny panties might be the weirdest thing about the whole Phalanx situation. (Cable #16)
Well, that happened. (Cable #16)
Cable vs. Derrida. (Cable #16)
He really never learns. (Cable #16)
It’s cute how anyone ever thinks Cameron Hodge is going to accept defeat with grace. (Cable #16)
GET IT? ‘CAUSE HE’S POINTY! (Cable #16)
NEXT EPISODE: Talking House of X and Powers of X with Chris Eddleman!

LINKS & FURTHER CATASTROPHES:

As Mentioned in Episode 272 – Children of the Phalanx

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
(X-Factor #106)
Damn skippy. (X-Factor #106)
Ew. (X-Factor #106)
Okay, the Phalanx is legitimately both cool and scary here. (X-Factor #106)
The looks on their respective faces really make this panel. (X-Factor #106)
R.I.P. (X-Factor #106)
Oh, THESE jerks. Again. (X-Factor #106)
Forge-o-Vision involves a lot of lucite rods, apparently. (X-Factor #106)
Douglock X-Plains the Phalanx. (X-Factor #106)
Spoiler: It’s all Phalanx. (X-Force #38)
My kingdom for this panel as drawn by Barry Windsor-Smith. (X-Force #38)
HE LOOKS LIKE A DINOSAUR OKAY (X-Force #38)
The Babel Spire has some serious Inferno vibes. (Excalibur #82)
Oh, yeah, this DEFINITELY ends well. (Excalibur #82)
Presenting: The stealth team. (Excalibur #82)
NEXT EPISODE: The Summers family goes rock climbing.

As Mentioned in Episode 271 – Abs for Days

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
And we open our cover spotlight series with Monet, who is, for some reason, tiptoeing in big clunky boots. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
A name AND implied backstory? Yeah, she’s doomed. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
Okay, yeah, Kubert’s Banshee can get it. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
This is actually a great look. Too bad it’s a Phalanx doppelgänger. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
There they are, folks: Banshee’s abs. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
Next up: Synch! (X-Men #36)
He just looks so wrong with the intact glasses! (X-Men #36)
Showing a bunch of predominantly white cops holding guns on an unarmed black teenager while claiming that superpowers are the only issue in play is a pretty good illustration of exactly how the mutant metaphor fails at intersectionality. (X-Men #36)
Oh, hey, the Phalanx got legit scary! (X-Men #36)
[whispered] but why does the phalanx need abs (X-Men #36)
Heck, yeah, dynamic covers! (Uncanny X-Men #317)
The gang’s (almost) all here! (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Seriously, he might as well just wear a t-shirt that says “I’m a supervillain pretending to be a teenager.” (Uncanny X-Men #317)
nope (Uncanny X-Men #317)
For those of you wondering: Yes, they will eventually hook up. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
What I’m mostly getting from this is that the Phalanx offers great dental. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Chekhov’s teleportation accident. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Monet is actually both of her younger sisters right now, but try not to think too much about it. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
I liked the last one better. (X-Men #37)
Definitely the French lessons. (X-Men #37)
Husk’s powers are so gross and awesome! (X-Men #37)
Such a cool use of layout. (X-Men #37)
Aw, man. (X-Men #37)
NEXT EPISODE: No puppy for Forge.

LINKS & FURTHER TRAVELS:

  • If you like picture books, it’s worth taking some time to check out the work of Peter Sís.

As Mentioned in Episode 270 – X-Ray Goggles and Mail-Order Lizards (feat. Steve Stokes)

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Imagine this, but with scissor-cut holes where the monsters used to be. (Fantastic Four #12)
DOOM DISAPPROVES!
Yep, Bill Sienkiewicz still has it. (New Mutants: War Children #1)
And Steve Ditko? Well, he always had it. (Strange Tales #??)
And thus began the debate which continues to this day: who would win in a fight? (It was a tie.) (Fantastic Four #12)
Guaranteed live delivery? Thank that one guy from Sarasota!
That’s right, Fin Fang Foom predates most of the Marvel Universe. AS HE SHOULD. (Strange Tales #89)
Miles, his partner Anna, Steve, and his wife Lilly!
NEXT EPISODE: The Phalanx Covenant (finally) begins!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 269 – Double Dactyl

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

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LINKS & FURTHER VILLAINY

SEANAN MCGUIRE IS COOL AS HELL

As Mentioned in Episode 268 – Disquettes

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Back to the Future made time travel seem like so much more fun. (Excalibur #81)
I love Christmas traditions! Red and green outfits, walks on the beach, having the lighthouse that was destroyed in a climactic multiversal event suddenly exist again for no good reason… (Excalibur #81)
I kind of love these weirdos. (Excalibur #81)
It’s cool, Douglock, Jay doesn’t recognize them either. (Excalibur #81)
Comedy gold. (Their choice of seating helps too.) (Excalibur #81)
Charles and Moira: best exes. (Excalibur #81)
Seriously, best exes. (Excalibur #81)
“For me, it’s always like this.” (Excalibur Annual #2)
“-and he looks faaaaabulous!” (Excalibur Annual #2)
Jamie Braddock: terrible from the start. (Excalibur Annual #2)
There! Fixed! Take that, psychology! (Excalibur Annual #2)
“Sorry, Amanda – spooling looked so cool we had to do it again, and we drew your name from the hat.” (Excalibur Annual #2)
Cons: spooling nightmares and crashing planes. Pro: that plane is so spacious! (Excalibur Annual #2)
“Until next time, boils and ghouls – pleasant screams!” (Excalibur Annual #2)
Either that picture is only symbolically there, or Kitty’s computer has real bad taste in image choice. (Excalibur Annual #2)
Kurt Wagner: best bro. (Excalibur Annual #2)
We didn’t talk about this in the episode, but the nerd in me really appreciates that this issue took two full pages to show us exactly how Proteus’s jail cell works. (Excalibur Annual #2)
NEXT TIME: Jay and Seanan McGuire talk villains!

As Mentioned in Episode 267 – The Saddest Joyride

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
One of those images that has really, really stuck with us over the years. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
It took a lot of self restraint not to post every single drawing of Emma in Bobby’s body from this issue. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Those Sienkiewicz inks! (Uncanny X-Men #314)
DAMN, Emma. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
You can almost see Generation X forming between the panels. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Programming a hologram of his dead sister to harangue him in the Danger Room may be the most Bishop move yet. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
He sewed that cape out of SO MANY cheap vinyl Catwoman costumes. (X-Men Annual #18)
Never take teenagers hostage; they’ll just judge you ’til you let them go out of sheer insecurity. (X-Men Annual #18)
[Insert Jude the Obscure joke here.] (X-Men Annual #18)
Don’t fuck with Jean Grey. (X-Men Annual #18)
WHY IS THERE A GIANT SQUID HERE (X-Men Annual #18)
Aw, Bishop. (X-Men Annual #18)
For more of this beautiful friendship, we’d recommend giving canon a miss and going straight to fellow X-Podling Adam Reck’s delightful Bish & Jubes–and, while you’re at it, supporting the collected edition on Kickstarter!
On Fridays, we wear fuchsia. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
That is one sweet coma beard. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
Yes, this is a good speech; but also, I just realized that given that the whole trial happens in space, it definitely falls under maritime law, AND I FORGOT TO MAKE ANY JOKES ABOUT IT IN THE EPISODE. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
NEXT EPISODE: We’re so close to nearly reaching what’s almost the Phalanx Covenant!

LINKS & FURTHER ACTION POINTS

As Mentioned in Episode 266 – They’re Good Dogs, Miles

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
Alex Summers, in a nutshell. I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
SEE WHAT THEY DID, THERE? I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
Strong Guy’s family is terrific. I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
That said, this dude is my favorite colorful local. I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
SOMEBODY REMEMBERED! KIND OF! I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
And that’s why you always leave a note. I miss road trips. (X-Factor #103)
Seriously, how is Polaris alive? I miss road trips. (X-Factor #104)
This cannot (and does not) possibly end well. (X-Factor #104)
He sure did that. (X-Factor #104)
And that’s how you supervillain with STYLE. (X-Factor #105)
This arc is almost enough to make us feel bad for Malice, which is a very weird sentence to type. (X-Factor #105)
NEXT EPISODE: Emma Frost goes for a joyride.

LINKS & FURTHER MEMES:

As Mentioned in Episode 265 – Rude Awakenings

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Is anyone else weirded out by the fact that that’s supposed to be Forge in the lower right-hand corner? (X-Men Annual #5)
The Shi’ar sext WEIRD. (X-Men Annual #5)
Professor X was definitely naked, right? (X-Men Annual #5)
The weirdest thing about this panel is that the tractor beam seems to have shrunk her shirt by about half. (X-Men Annual #5)
Professor X X-Plains human-Shi’ar relations. (X-Men Annual #5)
FASHION! (X-Men Annual #5)
Imagine how confusing it must be to run into Jubilee on alien planets. (X-Men Annual #5)
I DID NOT NOTICE THE HANGING TEDDY BEAR UNTIL I CLIPPED THE PANEL FOR THIS VISUAL COMPANION. (X-Men Annual #5)
He’s a hugger. (X-Men Annual #5)
Be fair, Gambit: there are a LOT of reasons Cyclops is never fun at parties. (X-Men #34)
BUT WHO IS LURKING IN THE FOREGROUND? (X-Men #34)
Sinister, moisturize your damn clones. (X-Men #34)
Oh, hey, Threnody! (X-Men #34)
‘Kay. (X-Men #34)
Ewwwwwwww. (X-Men #34)
Please bear in mind that these are costumes S.H.I.E.L.D. just happened to have lying around the Helicarrier. (X-Men #35)
“Also, do you know how hard it was to dress you in skintight neoprene while you were unconscious?” (X-Men #35)
The end of the world looks pretty rad. (X-Men #35)
Some artists definitely made some choices. (X-Men #35)
That’s our Cyclops. (X-Men #35)
Some of the layouts in this issue are really nice. (X-Men #35)
Sunset Grace X-Plains Sunset Grace (and marries Ronald Reagan). (X-Men #35)
Ouch. (X-Men #35)
NEXT EPISODE: Malice!

FURTHER LISTENING

As Mentioned in Episode 264 – Autotune the Phalanx

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Symbolism, Douglock. It’s full of Symbolism. (Excalibur #78)
Aw, these kids. (Excalibur #78)
Seriously, though, it’s really easy to imagine them breaking into song at this point. (Excalibur #78)
Ouch. (Excalibur #78)
We do not recommend doing this, for a lot of reasons. (Excalibur #78)
Ouch. (Excalibur #78)
They’re so dramatic! (Excalibur #79)
Courtney Camperson is a very good moppet. (Excalibur #79)
Damn, Kitty. That was uncalled for. (Excalibur #79)
WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE SO MEAN TO ROBOTS (Excalibur #80)
Aw, kiddo. (Excalibur #80)
The juxtaposition of what actually happens in these pages with what Stryfe assumed would happen is such a good use of the medium. (Excalibur #80)
(Excalibur #80)
Dang, Amanda Conner. DANG. (Excalibur #80)
I don’t entirely know how to process charming Charles Xavier. (Excalibur #78)
CHARLES, YOU SCAMP! (Excalibur #79)
“But watch out if anyone approaches you about, like, becoming pope. That won’t end well.” (Excalibur #80)
NEXT EPISODE: Star crossed… IN SPACE!