Jay – Page 71 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

The Lila Cheney music video will steal your heart

February 10, 2016 Jay 32 comments

Dazzler’s great and all, but if you know us, you know our hearts belong to a different X-Universe rock star: Joan Jett lookalike and intergalactic super-thief Lila Cheney. So, when director Arvin Bautista–part of the team behind that amazing Dazzler video that dropped last year–dropped a line to let us know that their next project was going to feature Lila, we were pretty excited.

The video–“I Will Steal Your Heart,” embedded above, finally dropped today. And y’all.

Y’all.

I know you have jobs, and classes. I know you have responsibilities, and commutes. But please, whatever you’re doing, put it aside. Close your office door. Get a hall pass. Pull over. (Seriously, though, why are you reading blogs while driving? Don’t do that.) And then watch this video, because it is amazing.

There are New Mutants! Stevie freakin’ Hunter! Intergalactic heists! In-over-his-head Cannonball! Really, really catchy music! (Also some possibly recognizable t-shirts, and maybe some of your faces, if you were among the folks who responded to the casting call back in November!) And we’d be remiss not to mention Sage Montclair’s absolutely splendid performance as a super kickass Lila Cheney.

You can find more on both the Lila and Dazzler videos, as well as info about the folks behind ’em, production stills, &c. over at http://www.superheropop.com/

As Mentioned in Episode 95 – Earthfall

February 8, 2016 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

TFW you forget a plotline for over a year and have to recap not only the original hook, but the entire context. (Uncanny X-Men #232)

If I had a dollar for every time this had happened when I was out camping… (Uncanny X-Men #232)

AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE. (Uncanny X-Men #232)

That is definitely not how you perform CPR. (Uncanny X-Men #232)

A lot of our nightmares start like this. (Uncanny X-Men #232)

“Okay. This looks bad.” (Uncanny X-Men #233)

Nope. (Uncanny X-Men #233)

That’s… actually, that’s incredibly reasonable. (Uncanny X-Men #233)

How much do we love this cover? SO MUCH. (Uncanny X-Men #234)

That couple in the background are by far our favorite characters in this arc. (Uncanny X-Men #234)

And again. (Uncanny X-Men #234)

“So, meth, then?” (Uncanny X-Men #234)

Ouch. (Uncanny X-Men #232)

You know that thing where you have a really awful dream about someone you know, and you wake up really mad at them, and then you team up with demons and try to sacrifice a bunch of babies and turn New York into Hell? Yeah, me, too. (Uncanny X-Men #233)

In Madelyne’s defense, this really is a super fucked up dream. (Uncanny X-Men #233)

“She’s her old self again, but about six inches shorter.” (Uncanny X-Men #233)

There is literally nothing okay about what is going on here. (Uncanny X-Men #234)

Has anyone ever tried to reproduce this awesome manicure IRL? You should do that. (Uncanny X-Men #234)

The first official apparance of one of the worst villain costumes in X-Men. At least it’s memorable? (Uncanny X-Men #234)

Next Week: This asshole.

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

For an introduction to the Brood (and one of the best Brood stories ever), listen to Episode 20 – The Brood They Carried.
For more on Hannah Conover, check out Left Unresolved – Do the X-Men Still Have a Frozen Lady in Their Freezer?, by Brian Cronin, over at CBR.
Here’s a pretty solid overview of the unfathomable clusterfuck of the direct market, from Heidi MacDonald at the Beat; including links to a number of other analyses from retailer and publisher perspectives.

95 – Earthfall

February 8, 2016 Jay 33 comments

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In which the X-Men finally follow up on a dropped plotline; you should probably not mess with abandoned star sharks; “Dawn of Blood” is a sometimes food; The Goblin Queen makes her first appearance; we debut a new podcast feature; and there may or may not be a frozen woman in the Xavier School basement.

X-PLAINED:

The Providian Order
Uncanny X-Men #232-234
The Brood (again)
Several ill-fated campers
Harry Palmer
The Brood as horror antagonists
Why John Doggett is the best X-Files agent
Psylocke’s armor
Why Nestor Carbonell should play Gambit
Some deeply dubious codenames
Red Bee
Michael the Bee
Reverend William Conover and his Glory Day Crusade
The Mile High Diner
The strange case of Hannah Conover
One hell of a nightmare
A deal with a devil
InfernoWatch
The direct market
Ways to approach an endless serial

INFERNO WATCH:

Madelyne meets and strikes a deal with S’ym
First appearance of the Goblin Queen costume

NEXT EPISODE: Evolutionary War

CORRECTION: In this episode, Jay recalled the direct market as having been conceived in significant part by Carol Kalish. It was, in fact, the brainchild of Phil Seuling.

You can find a visual companion to this episode–and links to recommended reading–on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

Rachel & Miles Review the X-Men, Episode 72

February 4, 2016 Jay 3 comments

Week of February 3, 2016:

In which we are pleasantly surprised by Greg Land; Magneto makes some valid fashion choices; Jay has a lot of feelings about universe-splitting; and Worst X-Man Ever ends in the only way it ever could.

REVIEWED:

Uncanny X-Men #3 (00:26)
*X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever #5 (06:07)

*Pick of the Week (11:33)

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

94 – WELCOME TO DIE! (feat. Elisabeth Allie)

January 31, 2016 Jay 32 comments

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In which Miles and Elisabeth X-Plain Pryde of the X-Men; Magneto is somehow even worse at branding than Mystique; the X-Universe is in desperate need of responsible adults; Wolverine hates kids; everybody’s mean to Lockheed; and the Sentinels represent your feelings.

X-PLAINED:

Wolverine’s Australian accent
Pryde of the X-Men
X-Men / Muppet Babies analogues
The Brotherhood of Mutant Terrorists
How not to comfort scared teenagers
The X-Cessible X-Men
The Mutant Power Circuit
Terrible parenting
A MacGuffin
A Really Dubious Evil Plot
Several Additional MacGuffins
THE POWER!
One of many reasons to be nice to animals
Space
The X-Men Arcade Game
Ground Kontrol
X-Men: Madness in Murderworld
The Uncanny X-Men (game)
Metaphorical sentinels
Mysterious lizards
Video game mechanics vs. superhero ethics
Pryde of the X-Men vs the ’90s animated series vs. X-Men: Evolution
Alternate animated series hooks

NEXT WEEK: The Brood go to a revival meeting

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

Rachel & Miles Review the X-Men, Episode 71

January 28, 2016 Jay 6 comments

Week of January 27, 2016:

In which Extraordinary X-Men should have started with #6; Worst X-Man Ever is remarkably self-aware; and Old Man Logan is the kind of thing you like if you like that kind of thing.

REVIEWED:

*Extraordinary X-Men #6 (00:27)
X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever #4 (04:46)
Old Man Logan #1 (09:14)

*Pick of the Week (12:40)

A Brief Heads-Up

January 11, 2016 Jay 34 comments

Art by Russell Dauterman. — (Dauterman / Sotomayor)

Jay here!

A quick heads up: for the next few weeks I’ll be out of town, getting and then recovering from top surgery (Yay!).

Here’s what to expect:

PODCASTS: Business as usual! We’ve recorded ahead a few weeks out, and the splendid Elisabeth Allie is going to be filling in so that I can take a few consecutive weeks off. Miles will be handling the copy and visual companions for an episode or two; please be nice to him as he gets his sea legs.

VIDEO REVIEWS: Miles is flying solo while I’m in Florida! Depending on the concentration of books, video reviews will go up either weekly or every other week. Also, I stole the external mic so we could record episode 93, so, that might be a thing. SORRY, MILES!

EVERYTHING ELSE: Blog and social media will probably be pretty quiet for at least the first week; and you should expect significant delays on e-mail correspondence. If you need to get in touch with us about something time-sensitive between now and January 23, please e-mail xplainthexmen(at)gmail(dot)com with “ATTN: MILES” in the subject line.

XO,

As Mentioned in Episode 91 – The Saddest Story Ever Told

January 10, 2016 Jay 8 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

The vaguely slapstick motifs in this story somehow make it even sadder. (New Mutants #64)

And it really only gets more depressing from here. (New Mutants #64)

No, seriously. (New Mutants #64)

Everything is terrible forever. (New Mutants #64)

=( (New Mutants #64)

Yeah, we do not have a sassy caption for this. Sorry. (New Mutants #64)

Aw, man. These kids. (New Mutants #64)

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT! (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

Harder than fighting Sentinels, apparently. (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

“It’s four hours of me, a vacuum cleaner, and a theremin.” (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

The X-Men take costume parties REALLY DAMN SERIOUSLY. (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

“Also, that is literally one of the only two non-uniform outfits you own.” (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

How not to lay out a page for coherent reading order. (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

SO THEN THAT HAPPENED. (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

And they all lived happily ever after. THE END! (But Doug Ramsey was still dead.) (Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade)

91 – The Saddest Story Ever Told

January 10, 2016 Jay 39 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which New Mutants #64 is the saddest single issue of any X-book ever; the New Mutants have to grow up fast; Warlock comes to terms with mortality; The Last of Us is harder to play the second time; Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade is delightfully unhinged; animated Cyclops is totally the worst; Beast probably has a terrible garage band; Jean starts a kitchen fire; and Wolverine saves Jubilee’s birthday.

X-PLAINED:

The saddest issue ever
New Mutants #64
The only okay way to watch Grave of the Fireflies
The aftermath of Doug Ramsey’s death
Several unhealthy coping mechanisms
The Last of Us
Tattoo Tales: X-Men: Masquerade
Some varyingly impressive costumes
General irresponsibility
Why Wolverine is wearing a clown suit
Douglock
The New Mutants’ D&D alignments

NEXT WEEK: You never forget your first Ship.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!