Apparently we’re all about the High Evolutionary today, starting with this great piece of fan art–riffing on our Very Sound Theory on the actual implications of his name–from artist Kyle Latino:
The High Evolutionary, by Kyle Latino
We had so much fun writing the High Evolutionary Mad-Libs for the Episode 96 cold open that we decided to make a playable version! Try your hand at concocting a new secret origin for the only supervillain so bad at his job that Apocalypse had to stage an intervention–and share your horrifying new canons in the comments!
The cast of “I Will Steal Your Heart,” along with director Arvin Bautista and guitarist/music producer Taiwo Heard. Photo courtesy of Arvin Bautista.
We’ve been raving for ages about director Arvin Bautista’s spectacular X-Men fan films: the Dazzler music video that first made the rounds back in 2014; and the follow-up, featuring Lila Cheney, which dropped last week. This weekend, we finally got sat down with Bautista himself to talk about adaptation anxiety, straddling the fan/pro divide, and what it took to bring Alison Blaire and Lila Cheney to life.
Art by David Wynne. Prints, cards, and travel mugs available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
How you know a psychic event is a big deal: the cross-franchise reaction montage! (X-Factor Annual #3)
Well, that’s certainly one way to stage an intervention. (X-Factor Annual #3)
These delightful scamps. (X-Factor Annual #3)
Warlock, never change. (New Mutants Annual #4)
Can we have a moment of rapt silence for how well June Brigman draws body language? (New Mutants Annual #4)
The High Evolutionary’s head scientist, Stack, appears to be dual-wielding a cane and a staple gun. Because, evolution. (New Mutants Annual #4)
“On Wednesdays, we wear pink.” (New Mutants Annual #4)
Hell, yeah, equal-opportunity battle lingerie! (Well, except for Magneto, but he marches to the beat of his own fuchsia drum.) (New Mutants Annual #4)
Horses: totally the worst. (New Mutants Annual #4)
The scene that blew tiny Miles’s tiny mind. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
Man, if we had a dollar for every time that happened… (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
POIT: Definitely the cutest sound effect. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
In which Alex comes *this close* to the realization that Charles Xavier is totally a supervillain. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
SURE, WHY NOT? (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
Remember the time Storm had adventures on pirate space city on the back of a flying wolf? Because that was definitely a thing that actually happened. (Classic X-Men #22)
Oh, THAT guy. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
I’m not actually certain they ever followed up on this. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
It’s kind of a shame this logo didn’t stick around, because it’s pretty sweet. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #12)
Art by David Wynne. Prints, cards, and travel mugs available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
In which we play Evolutionary War Mad-Libs; it’s probably a bad sign when Apocalypse decides you need an intervention; Dani is (briefly) the new Doug; horses are jerks; it’s probably really dangerous to be Longshot; Storm has the coolest friends; the High Evolutionary is very high indeed; and we make a (very token) nod to Valentine’s Day.
X-PLAINED:
Secret Origins of the High Evolutionary
Evolutionary War
The actual history of eugenics in America
X-Factor Annual #3
New Mutants Annual #4
Uncanny X-Men Annual #12
Classic X-Men #22
Purifiers (but not those purifiers)
Stack
Purge
How to tell when an event has major psychic repercussions
A Silver-Age callback
An Apocalypse-style intervention
Toga Steve (Val-Or)
The return of Bulk and Glow Worm
Equal-opportunity Hellfire lingerie
Mirage’s power upgrade
Miles vs. puberty vs. Uncanny X-Men
The coolest civilization ever
Colossus’s illegitimate kid
The cutest sound effect
Origins of the Scott/Jean/Logan love triangle
Stuff Jay likes and Miles doesn’t
The Elle Collins Theory of Podcast Roles
NEXT EPISODE: Captain Britain!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In which this week is all Wolverines, all the time; the All-New titles are all awesome; you should go watch “I Will Steal Your Heart” RIGHT NOW; and we love all of our listeners equally.
(Incidentally, we do in fact hang the fan art you physically mail us on our refrigerator.)
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Dazzler’s great and all, but if you know us, you know our hearts belong to a different X-Universe rock star: Joan Jett lookalike and intergalactic super-thief Lila Cheney. So, when director Arvin Bautista–part of the team behind that amazing Dazzler video that dropped last year–dropped a line to let us know that their next project was going to feature Lila, we were pretty excited.
The video–“I Will Steal Your Heart,” embedded above, finally dropped today. And y’all.
Y’all.
I know you have jobs, and classes. I know you have responsibilities, and commutes. But please, whatever you’re doing, put it aside. Close your office door. Get a hall pass. Pull over. (Seriously, though, why are you reading blogs while driving? Don’t do that.) And then watch this video, because it is amazing.
There are New Mutants! Stevie freakin’ Hunter! Intergalactic heists! In-over-his-head Cannonball! Really, really catchy music! (Also some possibly recognizable t-shirts, and maybe some of your faces, if you were among the folks who responded to the casting call back in November!) And we’d be remiss not to mention Sage Montclair’s absolutely splendid performance as a super kickass Lila Cheney.
You can find more on both the Lila and Dazzler videos, as well as info about the folks behind ’em, production stills, &c. over at http://www.superheropop.com/
How much do we love this cover? SO MUCH. (Uncanny X-Men #234)
That couple in the background are by far our favorite characters in this arc. (Uncanny X-Men #234)
And again. (Uncanny X-Men #234)
“So, meth, then?” (Uncanny X-Men #234)
Ouch. (Uncanny X-Men #232)
You know that thing where you have a really awful dream about someone you know, and you wake up really mad at them, and then you team up with demons and try to sacrifice a bunch of babies and turn New York into Hell? Yeah, me, too. (Uncanny X-Men #233)
In Madelyne’s defense, this really is a super fucked up dream. (Uncanny X-Men #233)
“She’s her old self again, but about six inches shorter.” (Uncanny X-Men #233)
There is literally nothing okay about what is going on here. (Uncanny X-Men #234)
Has anyone ever tried to reproduce this awesome manicure IRL? You should do that. (Uncanny X-Men #234)
The first official apparance of one of the worst villain costumes in X-Men. At least it’s memorable? (Uncanny X-Men #234)
In which the X-Men finally follow up on a dropped plotline; you should probably not mess with abandoned star sharks; “Dawn of Blood” is a sometimes food; The Goblin Queen makes her first appearance; we debut a new podcast feature; and there may or may not be a frozen woman in the Xavier School basement.
X-PLAINED:
The Providian Order
Uncanny X-Men #232-234
The Brood (again)
Several ill-fated campers
Harry Palmer
The Brood as horror antagonists
Why John Doggett is the best X-Files agent
Psylocke’s armor
Why Nestor Carbonell should play Gambit
Some deeply dubious codenames
Red Bee
Michael the Bee
Reverend William Conover and his Glory Day Crusade
The Mile High Diner
The strange case of Hannah Conover
One hell of a nightmare
A deal with a devil
InfernoWatch
The direct market
Ways to approach an endless serial
INFERNO WATCH:
Madelyne meets and strikes a deal with S’ym
First appearance of the Goblin Queen costume
NEXT EPISODE: Evolutionary War
CORRECTION: In this episode, Jay recalled the direct market as having been conceived in significant part by Carol Kalish. It was, in fact, the brainchild of Phil Seuling.
You can find a visual companion to this episode–and links to recommended reading–on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In which we are pleasantly surprised by Greg Land; Magneto makes some valid fashion choices; Jay has a lot of feelings about universe-splitting; and Worst X-Man Ever ends in the only way it ever could.
REVIEWED:
Uncanny X-Men #3 (00:26)
*X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever #5 (06:07)
*Pick of the Week (11:33)
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
In which Miles and Elisabeth X-Plain Pryde of the X-Men; Magneto is somehow even worse at branding than Mystique; the X-Universe is in desperate need of responsible adults; Wolverine hates kids; everybody’s mean to Lockheed; and the Sentinels represent your feelings.
X-PLAINED:
Wolverine’s Australian accent
Pryde of the X-Men
X-Men / Muppet Babies analogues
The Brotherhood of Mutant Terrorists
How not to comfort scared teenagers
The X-Cessible X-Men
The Mutant Power Circuit
Terrible parenting
A MacGuffin
A Really Dubious Evil Plot
Several Additional MacGuffins
THE POWER!
One of many reasons to be nice to animals
Space
The X-Men Arcade Game
Ground Kontrol
X-Men: Madness in Murderworld
The Uncanny X-Men (game)
Metaphorical sentinels
Mysterious lizards
Video game mechanics vs. superhero ethics
Pryde of the X-Men vs the ’90s animated series vs. X-Men: Evolution
Alternate animated series hooks
NEXT WEEK: The Brood go to a revival meeting
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
