Theresa Cassidy – Page 7 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 189 – How Do You Solve a Problem Like Nate Summers?

March 21, 2018 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

A day in the life of a never-nude pterosaur. (X-Force #5)

That’s a lot of teeth, Toad. (X-Force #5)

Somewhere, Bruce Banner has just felt a great disturbance in the force. (X-Force #5)

I keep changing my mind about my favorite part of this page. Right now, it’s Zero mugging facelessly at the reader. (X-Force #6)

Seriously, why does the Brotherhood have so many teeth? Are they EVIL TEETH? (X-Force #6)

Genuinely unsure whether Toad is supposed to have two or three rows of teeth in this one. (X-Force #6)

That’s a lot of bathtub. (X-Force #6)

My bad–on second look, they are not actually making PB&Js. (X-Force #6)

If I have to keep seeing these teeth, so do you. (X-Force #7)

t e e e e e e e e e e e e t h (X-Force #7)

Feral vs. Thornn. (X-Force #7)

It’s okay. He’ll be back. And possibly immortal? It’s complicated. (X-Force #7)

NEXT EPISODE: BLOODLUST!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

189 – How Do You Solve a Problem Like Nate Summers?

March 21, 2018 Jay 45 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which Jay’s mom broke the Internet; correct credits are important; everyone has a Danger Room; no one needs that many teeth; there are so many reasons to laugh at Stryfe; the Watcher is probably affiliated with Pepperidge Farm; Boom Boom is the Rogue of X-Force; and Cable’s pouches are definitely full of menstrual products.

X-PLAINED:

The Franklin Richards of Earth X
The One True Cable
X-Force #5-7
Pocket-Size Juggernaut
A novel approach to trauma surgery
A moment of intersectionality
Teeth of the early ’90s
Soft pink bags of rice-paper flesh
A villain speech
X-Force’s bathtub
Several Shel Silverstein poems that may or may not be about superheroes
Cooking with Boom Boom
Why the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants keeps the “Evil” in their name
Thornn (Lucia Callasantos)
Phantazia
Writers vs. Scripters
Sex Ed at the Xavier School
The Worst Twitter Thread

NEXT EPISODE: BLOODLUST! (But not inquiry.)

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 181 – Badgers Everywhere

January 21, 2018 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

What you see is pretty much what you get. (X-Force #1)

Welcome to X-Force! Hope you like leaping! (X-Force #1)

The most amazing thing about this page is the idea that an actual body is supposed to be in that armor. (X-Force #1)

Aw, that’s a noble sentiment! Hope you can keep it up! (X-Force #1)

Two whole pages later.(X-Force #1)

Is there an adult lubricant called Bodyslide? If not, there probably should be. (X-Force #1)

Boom Boom, never change. (X-Force #1)

Guys, that’s not how… ah, never mind. Have fun. (X-Force #1)

G.W. Bridge leverages S.H.I.E.L.D.’s significant spy network to keep a running tally of who has been naughty and who has been nice. (X-Force #1)

Lies? Continuity error? Retcons? WHO EVEN KNOWS ANYMORE? (X-Force #1)

THIS DELIGHTFUL SCAMP! (X-Force #1)

I spent hours combing through and comparing Shatterstar’s use of numbers in this arc. If you are expecting a useful revelation to follow that, you’re out of luck. (X-Force #2)

“No, two BLADES, not two… oh, never mind.” (X-Force #2)

Not pictured: Probably a really enthusiastic hug where Juggernaut picked up Black Tom and spun him around a bunch. (X-Force #2)

Siryn’s costume is actually pretty rad. (X-Force #3)

This commute is the worst. (X-Force #3)

What. (X-Force #3)

Cable, what are you even wearing? (X-Force #3)

That word balloon, though. (Spider-Man #16)

LOOK AT THAT FACE IT IS SO EXCELLENT (Spider-Man #16)

Dispatches from a more innocent time. (Spider-Man #16)

Cannonball is the best, but the faces in this issue are generally just incredibly good. (Spider-Man #16)

Did Todd McFarlane ever draw Judge Dredd? God, I hope so. (Spider-Man #16)

I’m honestly not sure what graphic enucleation would have added to this page; but you do you, I guess? (Spider-Man #16)

PLEASE STOP TRYING TO MAKE “SHATTY” HAPPEN. Please. (X-Force #4)

Remember when they only killed in self-defense, LIKE TWO ISSUES AGO? (X-Force #4)

MAYBE BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU DROP THEM DOWN ELEVATOR SHAFTS (X-Force #4)

Somewhere, there’s a universe where Mignola drew a bunch of X-Force, and the ’90s were a very different time. (X-Force #4)

NEXT EPISODE: The not even remotely triumphant return of Technet!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

The concerns expressed in Tom Lehrer’s “MLF Lullaby” don’t age wildly well, but it’s still a catchy song.
Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play is definitely a thing on Earth-4935, only instead of a Simpsons episode, it’s the Pizza Hut X-Men comic where Cyclops doesn’t think it’s cool to have an adventure in Cyberspace.

181 – Badgers Everywhere

January 21, 2018 Jay 35 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which X-Force is the cotton candy of comics; Jay & Miles overanalyze; eye spots are not the new domino masks; Feral is all about some murder; Black Tom and Juggernaut remain a delightful criminal power couple; Siryn’s costume is on point; over the edge is where we live; Jay gets briefly and intensely into Todd McFarlane; nothing will convince us that Fabian Nicieza did not know exactly what he was doing; and Kelly Thompson is a national treasure.

X-PLAINED:

Rumekistan
X-Force #1-4
Spider-Man #16
Leaping, both literal and metaphorical
Cannonball
Boom Boom
Cable
Domino
Warpath
Feral
Shatterstar
Siryn (Theresa Cassidy) (again)
MLF
The second and third-best-selling issues of all time
The Profit$
A very violent catchphrase
Chalet Shwartzkopf
Power Poses™ with Gideon™
The All-New, All-Different Weapon X (Garrison Kane)
6-Pack
Good vs. Awesome
George Washington Bridge
A moment so dramatic that it produces a second Shatterstar in a single panel
Some sports stuff, kind of
Uncomfortable anachronism
The stylistic necessity of healing factors
Marvel Unlimited view options
Rogue and Gambit

NEXT EPISODE: The not remotely triumphant return of Technet!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

173 – The Muir Island Saga, Part 2

November 19, 2017 Jay 43 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which Abs-lantis will not be denied; “slightly traumatized” is basically the default state of Xavier’s original students; we pick up the slack for Nicieza; Banshee and Moira MacTaggert probably have an active and varied love life; Xavier miscounts the X-Men; we look back over the Claremont/Simonson era of the X-Universe; and Jay makes a case for the re-resurrection of Jean Grey.

X-PLAINED:

X-Men: Red
Namor’s beard
The conclusion of the Muir Island Saga
Uncanny X-Men #280
X-Factor #70.
Cool orange spacesuits that make you immune to telepathy
Off-brand Magneto hats
Literary terrors of our childhoods
Agents DeMarco & Heacock (R.I.P.)
Casual use of nuclear weaponry
The cavalry
The end of the Shadow King
The most dysfunctional timeline
Uncanny X-Men #200-278
The case for an eclectic X-Universe
X-Campus
Resurrections, and when they do and don’t work

NEXT EPISODE: Ed Piskor’s Grand Design

The visual companion to this episode will be up sometime before the end of 2017, by which point Jay’s lungs will hopefully be working again. Yay?

(Seriously, though, fuck this cold. Fuck this cold so much.)

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 172 – The Muir Island Saga, Part 1

November 12, 2017 Jay One comment

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

But what if his dialogue also had its OWN tiny captions? (Uncanny X-Men #278)

“And that one dude from Final Fight will help me!” (Uncanny X-Men #278)

But whom could this mysterious stranger be? (Uncanny X-Men #278)

LOOK AT THIS EVIL FASHION QUEEN (Uncanny X-Men #278)

There is nothing okay happening here. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

Here, on the other hand, everything is beautiful and nothing hurts. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

That’s not… I mean… you know what? Never mind. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE! (Uncanny X-Men #278)

Honestly, there are so many answers to that question. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

His other power is flashbacks. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

And with that, Chris Claremont flew off into space, to explore new horizons. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Say what you want about her morals; Evil Rogue has a pretty rad costume. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

OH, HELL, YEAH! (Uncanny X-Men #279)

X-Factor’s New Wave era was brief but distinctive. (X-Factor #69)

It really never gets any more okay, does it? (No.) (X-Factor #69)

Why does Reisz suddenly have red hair? WHO KNOWS? IT’S A MYSTERY! (X-Factor #69)

AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE. (X-Factor #69)

The Art of War involves some remarkably specific ruminations on spandex. (X-Factor #69)

Wait for it… (X-Factor #69)

YES! (X-Factor #69)

Also 2017 in a nutshell. (X-Factor #69)

WELL, THAT CAN’T BE GOOD. (X-Factor #69)

NEXT EPISODE: Don’t smoke, kids. (Also, the Muir Island Saga concludes.)

LINKS & FURTHER READING

Miles talked about Thor: Ragnarok on Panel on Panels #143!
The Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men Wiki
Roland Hedley, Jr. meets X-Factor

172 – The Muir Island Saga, Part 1

November 12, 2017 Jay 48 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which you are probably more familiar with this show than Jay and Miles are; Paul Smith makes good art; the Shadow King is so extra that his narration has its own narration; Evil Sexy Moira is a fashion queen; there are absolutely no circumstances in which it is appropriate to use the phrase “fist-o-rama”; Legion gets possessed; and we know absolutely nothing about Pokémon.

X-PLAINED:

Universes where people are other people
What Miles thought of Thor: Ragnorok (spoiler-free)
The Muir Island Saga (Part 1)
Uncanny X-Men #278-279
X-Factor #69
Teflon continuity
Our (lack of) favorite episodes of Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men
The Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men wiki
An alternate timeline
Corpse telepathy
A diabolical plan, sort of
Topicality
Theft
Sci-Fi Warlord Moira MacTaggert
Improbable aerodynamics
The greatest thing
The death of Peter Nicholas
The uncanny genital valley
Interesting ways to expand Cyclops’s powers
X-Pokémon

NEXT EPISODE: The Muir Island Saga concludes!

ART CHALLENGE: Send us your horrifying X-Pokémon! (Note: We were not kidding when we said that we know absolutely nothing about Pokémon, which means that we will probably believe anything you tell us about canon. Have fun!)

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 166 – Proteus Has Two Mommies

October 1, 2017 Jay 7 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

“We don’t need no conservation of mass!” (New Mutants Annual #7)

Harness and Piecemeal. It only gets creepier from here. (New Mutants Annual #7)

This is definitely the last thing you see before you die. (New Mutants Annual #7)

Spoiler: Nope. (New Mutants Annual #7)

99% sure these dudes do not actually know how to play chess. (New Mutants Annual #7)

How great would it have been if Cable had made a Gulliver’s Travels joke? So great. (New Mutants Annual #7)

“Attack them with all your sound effects!” (New Mutants Annual #7)

Spoiler: They do, and it’s not. (New Mutants Annual #7)

OH, THANK GOD. (New Warriors Annual #1)

Piecemeal’s shirt is a little on-the-nose. (New Warriors Annual #1)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdJg6Duzzf4 (New Warriors Annual #1)

Namorita is great. (New Warriors Annual #1)

Oh, dear me. (New Warriors Annual #1)

I really like all the character-intro pages in this crossover. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)

Mother of the year, y’all. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)

You’re never too evil or too sexy for some good, old-fashioned filicide! (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)

You sure are, James. You sure are. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)

Inappropriate, Bobby. (X-Factor Annual #6)

None of my math textbooks were ever this psychedelic. (X-Factor Annual #6)

I briefly considered making this visual companion nothing but character-intro pages. (X-Factor Annual #6)

“Kings of Pain? Oh, yeah, isn’t that the crossover where Cyclops encourages a disturbed youth to commit suicide?” (X-Factor Annual #6)

(Nah, actually, he’s comparatively ethical about it; especially considering that the kid is technically already dead and has been for years.) (X-Factor Annual #6)

Okay, then. (X-Factor Annual #6)

NEXT EPISODE: Summers family bullshit on the moon!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men LIVE at New York Comic Con, with special guests Chris Claremont and Louise Simonson!
TEDxHarvardCollege
We met all-around rad dude Taki in Episode 106 – The X-Terminators!
We talked about Proteus in Episode 10 – Not All Mandroids!

166 – Proteus Has Two Mommies

October 1, 2017 Jay 69 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which we finally announce our NYCC panel lineup; Boom Boom is the Gina Linetti of X-Force; we don’t actually know very much about the New Warriors; Cable grows as a person; Cyclops makes an ethically dubious call; Warren Kenneth Worthington III is a jerk; Jay gets very angry at a fictional character; no one gets a happy ending and the skeleton was inside you all along.

X-PLAINED:

Penance (but not that Penance)
Our actual, for-real NYCC panel details
“Kings of Pain”
New Mutants Annual #7
New Warriors Annual #1
Uncanny X-Men Annual #15
X-Factor Annual #6
The Alliance of Evil
Harness
Piecemeal
Genetech
IDIC
Symbolic chess
The New Warriors
The Clean Plate Club from Hell
The Pec Twins
ReBoot
A really screwed up debate
Magneto vs. Human Nature
Privilege and Callouts

NEXT WEEK: Summers Family Bullshit on the Moon!

COME SEE US LIVE AT NEW YORK COMIC CON, WITH SPECIAL GUESTS CHRIS CLAREMONT AND LOUISE SIMONSON!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 77 – Die Hard with a Lobster

October 7, 2015 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 10/11/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

Hope you like this narration, because you will be reading a LOT of variations on it. (Fallen Angels #1)

Expounding on the Meaning of Friendship and Then Turning into a Propellor Plane with a Face: The Warlock Story. (Fallen Angels #1)

Oh, Ariel. You’re so… Ariel. (Fallen Angels #2)

HI, GOMI. HI, DON AND BILL. (Fallen Angels #2)

It’s a Madrox Madrox Madrox Madrox world. (Fallen Angels #2)

Don’t mess with Bill and Don. They will fight you, and they will win. (Fallen Angels #2)

Oh. THAT guy. (Fallen Angels #2)

Don’t tell me you don’t want to hang out there. (Fallen Angels #3)

It’s hard to be a super-smart cyborg lobster. (Fallen Angels #3)

The nature of Madrox’s duplicates is going to change pretty radically between this and the present. (Fallen Angels #3)

EVEN AMONG CRUSTACEANS (Fallen Angels #3)

Do you know how hard much restraint we exercised in not making this entire post nothing but pictures of Bill and Don? HINT: A lot. (Fallen Angels #3)

Moon Boy and Devil Dinosaur are good kids. (Fallen Angels #4)

Gomi is a conscientious lobster dad. (Fallen Angels #4)

Ariel is kind of creepy. (Fallen Angels #5)

DON NO (Fallen Angels #5)

DONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Fallen Angels #5)

Aw, Madrox. Madroxes. Whatever. (Fallen Angels #6)

“Also, you know that dream about the–” “DUDE, ENOUGH.” (Fallen Angels #6)

Welcome to Coconut Grove! Hope you survive the… y’know. (Fallen Angels #6)

Somewhere there’s an alternate universe that’s just like 616 except that Bobby and Warlock wore these costumes for the rest of New Mutants. (Fallen Angels #7)