Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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As Mentioned in Episode 84 – The Fourth Horseman

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/29/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
I try, but I just cannot get past those faces. (X-Factor Annual #2)
Acerbic done-with-this-shit Cyclops is the best Cyclops. (X-Factor Annual #2)
QWOPsilver. (X-Factor Annual #2)
Contexts in which Medusa’s superpower is not ridiculous: Yeah, we couldn’t think of any, either. (X-Factor Annual #2)
WHOOPS. (X-Factor Annual #2)
Take away the window dressing, and Maximus’s evil plan is basically weaponized empathy. (X-Factor Annual #2)
‘Kay, then. (X-Factor Annual #2)
“And stop by HR on your way out so we can get your feedback!” (X-Factor #21)
Creepiest powersuits? Creepiest powersuits. (X-Factor #21)
You tried, buddy. (X-Factor #22)
YA THINK, SCOTT? (X-Factor #22)
Reluctant hero Boom Boom is so great. (X-Factor #22)
Look, she’s seen Die Hard, okay? (X-Factor #22)
Even though we know who this dude is gonna turn out to be, the escalation is legitimately pretty creepy. (X-Factor #22)
No, really? (X-Factor #22)
The official debut of Archangel! (X-Factor #23)
“I made it myself, out of RUBY QUARTZ JELLO!” (X-Factor #23)
You can almost hear the portentous minor chord at the end. (X-Factor #23)
NEXT WEEK: The final episode of Secret Convergence on Infinite Podcasts!

84 – The Fourth Horseman

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/29/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/29/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

 

In which Franklin Richards is the center of a disproportionate number of X-Men specials; Quicksilver without powers is comedy gold; Luna is the best little girl on the moon (but it’s kind of a low bar); Jay accidentally cares about the Inhumans; Jean Grey may or may not be the Wesley Willis of X-Factor; Cameron Hodge’s exit interview is weirdly professional; Boom Boom is the best reluctant hero; and Archangel makes his debut.

X-PLAINED:

  • Quicksilver’s team associations
  • Knights of Wundagore
  • Chthon
  • X-Factor Annual #2
  • X-Factor #21-23
  • The Inhumans
  • Black Bolt
  • Medusa
  • Crystal
  • Lockjaw
  • QWOP Quicksilver
  • Leech’s wildly inconsistent powers
  • Gorgon
  • Luna
  • Headbutting ghosts, or, why sentence structure matters
  • Maximus
  • Several methods of mind control
  • A really terrible place for a date
  • Cameron Hodge: Bureaucrat Supervillain
  • The last will & testament of Warren Worthington III
  • Another superpower pet peeve
  • A theoretical team-up we would love to see
  • The Arlington Interactive Museum of (evil) Science
  • Some really dumb armor
  • Archangel
  • Our preferred third Summers brothers

NEXT WEEK: Secret Convergence on Infinite Podcasts!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 83 – Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/22/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
It is reasonably appropriate to judge this book by its cover. (X-Men Annual #3)
Spot the references. (X-Men Annual #3)
ARKON THE MAGNIFICENT! (X-Men Annual #3)
I guess when your job is cleaning up after Tony Stark, the existential hellscape of Funky Winkerbean starts to feel like a vacation. (X-Men Annual #3)
DON’T TOUCH THE HAIR! (X-Men Annual #3)
You’d think the Danger Room would have ANY KIND OF REMOTELY FUNCTIONAL SAFETY PROTOCOLS BY NOW, but no. (X-Men Annual #3)
The art makes a really, really good counterpoint to the conversation in these panels. (X-Men Annual #3)
Cyclops encouraging other characters to talk about their feelings: NEVER NOT FUNNY. (X-Men Annual #3)
Don’t forget to watch TV, kids! You never know when it’ll come in handy! (X-Men Annual #3)
The best thing about this panel is Wolverine’s understated “Geez.” (X-Men Annual #3)
“I mean, look, there’s a really good chance we’re just going to straight-up explode.” (X-Men Annual #3)
Starman #4 is about a Hawaiian shirt that is a gateway to heaven. In related news, you should all go read Starman RIGHT NOW, because it is WONDERFUL.
If you’re not hearing Queen in your head right now, I don’t really understand you. (X-Men Annual #3)
Things that are not awesome about this fight panel: NONE OF THEM. (X-Men Annual #3)
SHE’LL SAVE EVERY ONE OF US! (X-Men Annual #3)
“Oh, y’know, just stole a dragon from some flying commandos. No big deal.” (X-Men Annual #3)
This planet sucks. (X-Men Annual #3)
Wolverine, that’s not… y’know what? Never mind. (X-Men Annual #3)
I’m pretty sure that no writer will ever reference this again. (X-Men Annual #3)
“Well, that, or the colorist forgot to make it red, which also happens sometimes.” (X-Men Annual #3)
Somewhere in the multiverse, there’s a universe where the X-Men went, “Fuck it. Let’s just go be space barbarians.” (X-Men Annual #3)
NEXT WEEK: This jerk.

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

83 – Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival

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1_Arkon
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/22/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

 

In which we travel back in time to 1979 for our second live convention special; X-Men Annual #3 desperately needs a Queen soundtrack; George Perez draws great Banshee; Polemachus is kind of a bullshit planet; we dream of a world without Funky Winkerbean; Cyclops’s costume does not mix and match well; if you can be someone else, you should probably be Brian Blessed; Colossus gets a dragon; and Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival is awesome.

X-PLAINED:

  • X-misadventures in Las Vegas
  • X-Men Annual #3
  • Arkon the Magnificent
  • Isadore and Irmagarde Uhman
  • The Comical Books
  • Polemachus the planet vs. Polemachus the person
  • Funky Winkerbean
  • Several logistical problems with the Danger Room
  • MVP Cyclops
  • Some very good visual counterpoint to dialogue
  • Paperboard lightning bolt disambiguation
  • Jay’s favorite Starman story
  • X-title and music pairings
  • Imperions
  • Visual perspective in grand melees
  • How to order a meal on Polemachus
  • One specific variation on Cyclops’s powers
  • The X-Men as Spinal Tap
  • Space-barbarian eyewear
  • The annual cabinet
  • The most appropriate X-team placement for Funky Winkerbean
  • Best worst characters
  • Our favorite X-Force teams
  • Secret Convergence on Infinite Podcasts

NEXT WEEK: Somehow, Cameron Hodge manages to get even worse.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 81 – The Kids Are All Right, with Dennis Hopeless

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Listen to the episode here.

LINKS & FURTHER READING

81 – The Kids Are All Right, with Dennis Hopeless

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/8/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 11/8/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which we sit down with one of our favorite writers to talk about his upcoming series; the X-teens take to the road; Season One is kind of Friday Night Lights; good relationships make good stories; and we are really excited for All-New X-Men.

X-PLAINED:

  • Genesis (Evan Sabahnur)
  • Dennis Hopeless
  • Secret origins of X-Men: Season One
  • All-New X-Men, vol. 2
  • How to write Jean Grey
  • Building a team
  • Why Quentin Quire isn’t in All-New X-Men
  • All-New in the larger X-line, and the X-line in the larger Marvel Universe
  • Definitive X-eras
  • Cable & X-Force
  • What makes Cable tick
  • Boom Boom
  • Colossus and Domino
  • The narrative case for solid relationships
  • Favorite villains
  • Mark Bagley
  • Character evolution across multiple creative teams
  • X-teen hobbies
  • Vegas Valley Comic Book Fest

NEXT WEEK: The New Mutants meet Bird Boy, with mixed results.

There’s no visual companion this week, but you can find a list of links mentioned in this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

Rose City Comic Con was the COOLEST

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Listen to the live episode here!

We are so ridiculously lucky: our hometown con is the coolest. It’s only a few years old, but Rose City Comic Con is one of the most fun, accessible, welcoming, and all-around celebratory comics shows we’ve ever been to. This was our first con as Rachel & Miles X-Plain the X-Men, and our first ever live episode; and we can’t imagine a better place to start.

Click through the gallery below for photos from the con, the panel, and the party! (We’ll toss the sketches up separately tomorrow!)

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 10/4/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Someone left Rachel alone with the button press.
More con prep.
We have a table! (Also, a lot of people were really irate about the word balloon, SIGH.)
WHOADANG, it’s the brand new zines and con-exclusive t-shirts!
Punk Cyclops was one of our favorite cosplays of the show.
Awesome going as well as coming!
Our friend Sarah–a kickass pro photographer in her own right–was cosplaying as Rule-63 Phil Sheldon of Marvels!
Rachel’s heart 100% belongs to Norita Smoeuk’s 50s Girl-Gang X-Men. These three were part of a whole group cosplaying Norita’s wildly kickass designs.
Even Marvel characters are sufficiently confused by their own continuity to need our help!
Benja Barker of Portland’s Alter Egos Society hooked us up with this incredibly cool X-Men belt buckle, which sneakily velcros around pretty much any belt.
Monsters of Podcasting celebrating at the Kaijucast booth after our Sunday panel. L to R: Rachel and Miles; Zee and Jamie of the British History Podcast; Kyle of Kaijucast (and our producer!).
“Let’s just meet at the panel room,” we told the guests. “There shouldn’t be a line or anything.”
Damn, there were a lot of you. HI, PORTLAND!
Rachel and Miles X-plain Cable and Stryfe in the live episode cold open. (Photo courtesy of Kyle Yount.)
Left to right: Ann Nocenti, Miles Stokes, Rachel Edidin, Jeff Parker, Chris Yost. (Photo courtesy of Kyle Yount.)
Annie and Miles. (Photo courtesy of Sarah Giffrow / Upswept Creative.)
Annie, Miles, Rachel, and Jeff. (Photo courtesy of Sarah Giffrow / Upswept Creative.)
Katie and Kestrel set the question bar AWFULLY high. (Photo courtesy of Sarah Giffrow / Upswept Creative.)
Custom drink menus from The Steep & Thorny Way to Heaven. (The X-Men menu was 21+; New Mutants were all-ages.)
SO. GOOD.
Magneto and friends hang the Days of Future Past wall.
(Magneto also doubled as DJ and bartender. Thank you, Myrrh!)
Live cold-open previews have been a thing since our ECCC meetup. This time, we got some help from Fern. Yes, we have TWO tiny Squirrel-Girl X-perts, and they are both THE BEST. (Photo courtesy of @pawpaw5771)
There are a LOT of variations on this photo, but I think Max and Brandon may have been the first. (Photo courtesy of Brandon Goede.)
White Phoenix has no patience for this post-apocalypse nonsense. (Photo courtesy of Cassandra Carter.)
The word balloons from ECCC were also out in force. (Photo courtesy of Cassandra Carter.)
The British History Podcast wants you to know that your dark future really doesn’t have a damn thing on the past. (Photo courtesy of Jamie and Zee.)
The team-up you weren’t expecting. (Photo courtesy of Christopher Troy.)
We’re gonna go ahead and say that “continuity” is the correct collective noun for Cyclopses. In that spirit: here’s continuity of Cyclopses. (Photo courtesy of Jeff Polier.)
Another homage to the original cover. Dave, on the left, helped build and weather the wall. Katie’s Marvel Girl is updated from the o5 group previously pictured on our blog. (Photo courtesy of the Proctors.)
This Shadowcat is not only an awesomely on-point cosplayer (that Lockheed!) but also one of the coolest teenagers we’ve ever met. (Photo courtesy of Tom Kishel.)
Two very happy, very tired X-Perts. (Photo courtesy of Myrrh Larsen.)
NEXT WEEK: Fallen Angels!

Special thanks to a LOT of people without whom the con and show wouldn’t have been possible:

  • Panel Guests: Ann Nocenti, Jeff Parker, and Chris Yost
  • Earth-811 Craft Department: Dave Proctor and Cameron Harris
  • Everyone from Rose City Comic Con; but particularly Mikey Nielson, Ron Brister, and Paula Brister.
  • Our amazing, amazing, amazing party hosts at The Steep & Thorny Way to Heaven: Megan Skye Hale and Myrrh Larsen
  • Team X-Plain: Tina Abate, David Wynne, and Kyle Yount.
  • The Absolute Goddamn Best: Katie Moody and Anna Sheffey.
  • Last but not least: Max Carleton, Dusty Eppers, Jason Betournay, Scott Hazle, Fern, Kestrel, Jasper, and everyone who turned out to help, yell, party, and X-Plain with us at and after RCCC!

 

76 – Live at Rose City Comic Con, with Ann Nocenti, Jeff Parker, and Chris Yost

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 10/4/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 10/4/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

 

In which we record our first live episode; Rose City Comic Con is AMAZING; Ann tells us how to torture the X-Men; Jean Grey needs more friends; Chris survives an encounter with an angry vampire; Squirrel Girl sets the high bar for questions; everyone has opinions about Longshot’s hair; Jeff gets meta; Cyclops is the best at fighting Sentinels; and Rachel ALMOST gets through an entire panel without swearing.

 

X-PLAINED:

  • Cable (Nathan Summers)
  • Stryfe (Also Nathan Summers)
  • Rose City Comic Con
  • Christopher Yost
  • Jeff Parker
  • Ann Nocenti
  • The X-Men
  • Superheroes vs. soap operas
  • Continuity vs. evolution
  • Updating the Silver Age
  • What defines an X-book
  • All of our iconic X-eras
  • Close encounters of the fan kind
  • The Continuiteens
  • Marvel Girl and Squirrel Girl team-ups
  • Narrative regrets
  • How we’d end the X-Men
  • X-Men best suited to professional wrestling
  • Our personal mutant metaphors
  • Which of the X-Men is best at fighting Sentinels

NEXT WEEK: Fallen Angels!

There’s no visual companion this week, but you can see photos from the panel, party, and more in our Rose City Comic Con roundup!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 75 – By Their Deeds You Shall Know Them

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 9/20/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
It’s hard to be a mutant teenager. (X-Factor #16)
We kind of skirted this part of the storyline, because it makes us both super uncomfortable and we weren’t really sure what angle to approach it from. You do you. (X-Factor #16)
Boom Boom fits right in at X-Factor! (X-Factor #16)
“Triumphant strangulation” is not a phrase you get to use under very many circumstances. (X-Factor #16)
Well, no, but it’s a nice sentiment. (X-Factor #16)
WHOOPS. (X-Factor #17)
The kids are the only ones who are not treating this as business as usual. (X-Factor #17)
X-Factor is THE WORST at interventions. (X-Factor #17)
Bobby, now is probably not the best time to joke about flight safety. Also, I’m kind of genuinely horrified that they APPARENTLY KEEP SPARE UNIFORMS WHERE THE LIFE VESTS GO. This is like how in the LEGO Blackbird there’s a chair blocking the door of the cabinet with the fire extinguisher and… okay, look, I realize no one else cares about this. BUT IT BUGS ME. (X-Factor #17)
“Not that I don’t appreciate the rescue, but don’t you people ever use doors?” (X-Factor #17)
“NOPE!” (X-Factor #17)
Cameron Hodge is so good at villain speeches. (X-Factor #17)
FANCY THAT, SKIDS. (X-Factor #18)
“I mean, we’re gonna get brainwashed by Scott and Jean’s clone’s kid’s clone, and then join a cult; and I’ll get killed in space by Holocaust; but the Phoenix Force is definitely not involved in most of that.” (X-Factor #18)
Scott’s life is basically an ongoing game of Hallucination or Hologram right now. (X-Factor #18)
“Skids, sometimes when two grown-ups love each other very much, and one of them was briefly replaced by a cosmic force, and the other married her clone, and–look, just give us a minute, please.” (X-Factor #18)
Ouch. (X-Factor #18)
DUH. (X-Factor #18)
Oh, hi, Angel. (X-Factor #18)
“Nineteen issues in, and we STILL haven’t figured doors out.” (X-Factor #19)
Cyclops X-Plains superhero comics in a nutshell. (X-Factor #19)
THOSE ARE NOT HORSES. Awesome, but not horses. (X-Factor #19)
Have I mentioned that X-Factor is the worst at interventions? Because X-Factor is definitely the worst at interventions. (X-Factor #19)
Well, then. (X-Factor #19)
The kids X-Factor rescued remain by far and away the most functional aspect of the whole operation. (X-Factor #20)
NEXT WEEK: Rachel & Miles Live at Rose City Comic Con, with Ann Nocenti, Jeff Parker, and Christopher Yost!

75 – By Their Deeds You Shall Know Them

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 9/20/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 9/20/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

 

In which Masque is the worst Morlock; makeouts are a good reason to learn to control your powers; Cyclops and Marvel Girl are terrible role models; Iceman is the heart of X-Factor; Cameron Hodge finally shows his hand; the kids are all right (and probably the only ones who are); and we’ve basically given up on X-Factor ever learning to use doors.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Right
  • The Ani-Mator
  • X-Factor #16-20
  • Training with X-Factor
  • Skids’ backstory
  • Motivational makeouts
  • Miles’s Thor-ner
  • Thor #377-378
  • Why you don’t make deals with frost giants
  • The mystical realm of Pittsburgh
  • Redundant funeral graffiti
  • A totally rad villain speech
  • The evolution of Iceman
  • Dubious flight safety precautions
  • Rictor (Julio Esteban Richter)
  • Some really epic gaslighting
  • A probably-inevitable confrontation
  • Supervillain team-building exercises
  • Park maintenance

NEXT WEEK: Rachel & Miles Live at Rose City Comic Con; with Ann Nocenti, Jeff Parker, and Christopher Yost!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!