Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Randall

408 – Yabba Yabba Yabba

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In which Bishop gets another miniseries; splinter timelines make fun narrative sandboxes; the X.S.E. goes detecting; the Statue of Liberty never fares well in dystopian futures; “Booger” is not a name you give yourself; and we can’t believe it’s taken us this long to make a hanky code joke about Bishop.

X-PLAINED:

  • Graymalkin
  • Bishop: X.S.E. #1-3
  • Bishop (more) (again)
  • Earth-1191
  • The X.S.E.
  • Hecate
  • Malcolm
  • Randall
  • The popularity of Earth-1191 miniseries
  • The solid-light hologram of Theseus
  • The Fanatix
  • Pulsar
  • Dogface
  • Hardball
  • Razorback
  • Kali (but not that one)
  • Shadowbox
  • “Quotations”
  • Seldon Trask
  • A mystery
  • The Rook
  • Annabella Knox
  • Anthony Shaw
  • The Bay Borough
  • The best episode of Justice League Unlimited
  • Organic LMDs
  • A disguise
  • An uncanny child
  • Dazzler’s career
  • X-Adjectives

NEXT EPISODE: The M-Plate Saga!

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As Mentioned in Episode 340 – Retconaganda

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Welcome to the X.S.E., where moral ambiguity goes to die. (X.S.E. #1)
The villains in this series are exceptionally one-note even by comics standards. (X.S.E. #1)
I still can’t figure out what’s happening with the purple garment that Bishop and possibly also his grandmother are wearing. (X.S.E. #1)
Bishop has basically always been the same dude. (X.S.E. #1)
Hey, it’s Malcolm… (X.S.E. #2)
…and Randall! (X.S.E. #2)
I know the balloon at the top technically goes with the panel above, but it really looks like Fitzroy is just reciting his own name like a Pokémon. (X.S.E. #3)
De Witness. (X.S.E. #4)
Shackle’s costume is somewhat improbable. (X.S.E. #4)

340 – Retconaganda

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the X.S.E. miniseries is future copaganda; Earth-1191 has no room for moral ambiguity; Bishop pulls a Marty McFly; Malcolm and Randall get distinct personalities; and you really shouldn’t give officers a symbol of authority that there’s no way to revoke.

X-PLAINED:

  • Some of Bishop’s further adventures
  • X.S.E. #1-4
  • The future, sort of
  • Earth-1191 (more) (again)
  • The X.S.E. (more) (again)
  • Lucas Bishop (more) (again)
  • Shard Bishop (more) (again)
  • Grandmother (who may or may not be Storm)
  • Hancock (who may or may not be Cyclops)
  • The deeply baffling Bishop family tree
  • The fallability of childhood memory
  • Exhumes
  • Dubious reclamation
  • Heca’te
  • The Witness (more) (again)
  • Trevor Fitzroy (more) (again)
  • Several potential continuity errors
  • Malcolm and Randall (more) (again)
  • Emplates
  • Shirley
  • Mexican-American mutants
  • A cross-media quote

NEXT EPISODE: The return of Carl the X-Cutioner

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 280 – Business-Casual Basilisk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Agent Coulson of Earth-1218 is mostly in it for the belly rubs.
What you see is what you get; and what you get is a large man with large guns and large feelings. (Bishop #1)
The gravitas of the X.S.E. is somewhat undercut by the fact that Bishop’s gun very clearly uses Nerf ammo. (Bishop #1)
You see what I mean about the shirt, right? (Bishop #1)
Do you think the other future criminals made fun of Mountjoy for not wearing a bunch of neon or having a mullet? (Bishop #1)
Bishop X-plains Mountjoy. (Bishop #1)
This effect is so creepy! (Bishop #1)
It’s okay, buddy. We’ve all been there. Sort of. Not really. (Bishop #2)
The utter disconnect between the expressions in this one is such a good detail. (Bishop #2)
TFW your holographic sister will not sit like a normal person on your futuristic bladed motorcycle. (Bishop #2)
Additional evidence against Hancock being Cyclops: he probably wouldn’t imply that his optic blasts generate heat. (Bishop #3)
Mountjoy is everyone! (Bishop #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Callasantos family reunion!

280 – Business-Casual Basilisk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the future is not great at codenames; spot foil is cool as hell; Mountjoy is bafflingly business-themed; Bishop goes full Point Break; Jean Grey and Lorna Dane should absolutely be friends; and Jay & Miles are heading to ECCC 2020!

X-PLAINED:

  • Lola vs. L.O.L.A.
  • A very good cat
  • Bishop #1-4
  • Lucas Bishop
  • Earth-1191
  • X.S.E.
  • A surprising convergence
  • Guilt
  • Bantam
  • Mountjoy
  • Some terrible banter
  • Several nontraditional modes of possession
  • Shard Bishop
  • How the kids talk these days
  • Hancock
  • Fashion of the future
  • A complex ethical struggle

NEXT EPISODE: More Cats references.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 267 – The Saddest Joyride

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
One of those images that has really, really stuck with us over the years. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
It took a lot of self restraint not to post every single drawing of Emma in Bobby’s body from this issue. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Those Sienkiewicz inks! (Uncanny X-Men #314)
DAMN, Emma. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
You can almost see Generation X forming between the panels. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Programming a hologram of his dead sister to harangue him in the Danger Room may be the most Bishop move yet. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
He sewed that cape out of SO MANY cheap vinyl Catwoman costumes. (X-Men Annual #18)
Never take teenagers hostage; they’ll just judge you ’til you let them go out of sheer insecurity. (X-Men Annual #18)
[Insert Jude the Obscure joke here.] (X-Men Annual #18)
Don’t fuck with Jean Grey. (X-Men Annual #18)
WHY IS THERE A GIANT SQUID HERE (X-Men Annual #18)
Aw, Bishop. (X-Men Annual #18)
For more of this beautiful friendship, we’d recommend giving canon a miss and going straight to fellow X-Podling Adam Reck’s delightful Bish & Jubes–and, while you’re at it, supporting the collected edition on Kickstarter!
On Fridays, we wear fuchsia. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
That is one sweet coma beard. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
Yes, this is a good speech; but also, I just realized that given that the whole trial happens in space, it definitely falls under maritime law, AND I FORGOT TO MAKE ANY JOKES ABOUT IT IN THE EPISODE. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
NEXT EPISODE: We’re so close to nearly reaching what’s almost the Phalanx Covenant!

LINKS & FURTHER ACTION POINTS

267 – The Saddest Joyride

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Emma Frost is a better Iceman than Bobby Drake; Generation X is aggressively foreshadowed; Malcolm and Randall are the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to Bishop’s Hamlet; and we launch a campaign for our own Multiversal designation.

X-PLAINED:

  • The first time the X-Men met Emma Frost
  • Uncanny X-Men 314-315
  • X-Men Annual #18
  • A game show nobody should ever under any circumstances actually make
  • Emma Frost’s recruitment tactics
  • Previously unexplored ice powers
  • The direct prelude to Generation X
  • Caliban (more) (again)
  • SoftPaws(TM)
  • The giant squids of New York
  • The neophyte
  • A trial, kind of
  • X-Men power fantasies
  • Earth-X-Plain

NEXT EPISODE: We’re so close to nearly reaching what’s almost the Phalanx Covenant!

Game show music by MusicManiac301; used with permission.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 193 – Sewers of Tomorrow

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
On one hand: These dudes are pretty rad. On the other hand: being able to detect normal humans is a pretty ridiculous mutant power. (Uncanny X-Men #277)
John Romita, Jr. can be hit-or-miss, but he definitely draws some rad miscreants of the future. (Uncanny X-Men #277)
WOMP. (Uncanny X-Men #277)
Compulsory Fitzroy Hair Appreciation Moment(TM). (Uncanny X-Men #277)
The Witness, in all his really creepy glory. (Uncanny X-Men #277)
Can you imagine trying to have a conversation with this dude? (Uncanny X-Men #277)
I don’t understand what’s happening with Cyclops’s torso; and, frankly, I don’t want to. (Uncanny X-Men #278)
“Look! A distraction!” (Uncanny X-Men #278)
The first appearance of the letter… (Uncanny X-Men #278)
…and the second, FROM THE SAME FLIPPIN’ PAGE. (Uncanny X-Men #278)
Thaaaaat’s our Archangel! (Uncanny X-Men #278)
Can confirm. -Jay (Uncanny X-Men #278)
*Today, at least. (Uncanny X-Men #278)
Long Island cops are clearly unfamiliar with Cyburai. (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Mystique is exceptionally bad at helping. (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Damnit, Forge. (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Storm’s reaction is appropriate. (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Bobby. Have you MET your parents? (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Best. Date. Ever. (Uncanny X-Men #279)
Remember that time Mikhail Rasputin turned a random skater into a tree? Because that certainly happened. (Uncanny X-Men #280)
Hanging out naked in the rain? This dude is DEFINITELY learning the ropes from Storm. (Uncanny X-Men #280)
DAMNIT, Forge. (Uncanny X-Men #280)
NEXT EPISODE: Brood trouble in the Big Easy!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

193 – Sewers of Tomorrow

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we pour one out for Malcolm and Randall; Cyclops is the worst at fun; Storm is better than you and always will be; Bishop forgets his first name; the X-Men can’t tie bow ties; Iceman’s dad is spectacularly awful; Mikhail Rasputin may have some lingering issues; and Doug Ramsey would probably have been pretty entertained by Hackers if he had survived long enough to see it.

X-PLAINED:

  • Whether Professor Xavier is dead
  • Marvel time vs. podcast time
  • Uncanny X-Men #287-290
  • The Wit and Wisdom of Henry McCoy
  • A dance of death and destruction
  • Styglut
  • Future flashbacks
  • Sewers of tomorrow
  • The Witness
  • “Fun”
  • Blood math
  • A mysterious letter
  • A terrible date
  • Several capes
  • The return of the cyburai
  • A theoretical Hackers crossover

NEXT EPISODE: Brood trouble in the Big Easy!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 180 – Lawful Badass

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
What you see is pretty much what you get. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
Cybernetic fuckboys. Don’t worry, they’re all going to die soon. For now. Mostly. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
That is… certainly some dialogue, there. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
And that’s why she’s the boss. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
“We eat dinner naked. It’s very sexy. And then we do the sexy dishes, sexily.” (Uncanny X-Men #281)
Oh, no! Not Bevatron! (Uncanny X-Men #281)
If you had told me a year ago that there was armor worse than Cameron Hodge’s ruby quartz armor, I would not have believed you. Mea culpa. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
Oh, no, not again. (Uncanny X-Men #281)
OH HELL YES. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
Professor X is kind of a sore winner. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
And then, suddenly, Storm was telekinetic. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
That’s gotta sting. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
“But first, The Very Hungry Caterpillar.” (Uncanny X-Men #282)
Earth-1191 is AMAZING. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
I really want to know if all these criminals dressed up special for the occasion, or if this is just what everyone hangs out looking like in the future. (Uncanny X-Men #282)
ABOUT DAMN TIME. (See what I did, there?) (Uncanny X-Men #282)
“Ha, ha!” (Uncanny X-Men #283)
Aw, this kid. (Uncanny X-Men #283)
“I’m going to the comics shop to cancel my subscription RIGHT NOW!” (Uncanny X-Men #283)
Bishop, I know you come from a difficult timeline, but even you have to appreciate how rad that Walt Simonson Archangel design is. (Uncanny X-Men #283)
Are… Iceman and Colossus levitating? (Uncanny X-Men #283)
This is why we–or at least the Upstarts–can’t have nice things. (Uncanny X-Men #283)
NEXT EPISODE: Guns ‘n’ Pouches!

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