Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: professor x

As Mentioned in Episode 41 – Hated and Feared

6 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 2/1/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Not a dream! Not an imaginary story! (X-Men #193)
“The hard part wasn’t bringing you back from the dead–it was getting you into those leather pants.” (X-Men #193)
Firestar’s first comic-book appearance. We’d like to tell you it goes uphill from here, but, no. (X-Men #193)
Let’s take a moment to admire the complete impracticality of Kitty’s jacket. (X-Men #193)
“That’s right, Sam. And when you’re headmaster of your own school, you can dress however you want.” (X-Men #193)
Kitty’s jacket again, because it is just so gloriously awful. (X-Men #193)
The robot enforcers of the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. Or something. (X-Men #193)
Empath: Literally the worst kid. (X-Men #193)
In which Charles Xavier takes advantage of a teachable moment. (X-Men #193)
Aw, Nimrod, you’re so wacky. (X-Men #193)
It seems like a waste that this sequence isn’t accompanied by sitcom opening-credits music. (X-Men #194)
Things about Rachel Summers that are not The Saddest Thing at this point in continuity: None of them. (X-Men #194)
Really, Earth-811? Limitless budget, and you couldn’t design anything that looked better than THAT? (X-Men #194)
Voltron special! (X-Men #194)
The scene depicted on the cover ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT TAKE PLACE AT ANY POINT DURING THIS ISSUE. Good god, Marvel. (X-Men #195)
And now, an actual nightmare that you have actually had! (X-Men #195)
Seriously, what the hell, George? (X-Men #195)
Aw. (X-Men #195)
Damn, Shadowcat. That’s cold. Not entirely inaccurate, but cold. (X-Men #195)
I have no idea how they’re going to explain this one to their parents. (X-Men #195)
Next Week: Firestar!

41 – Hated and Feared

25 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 2/1/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 2/1/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which Nimrod is probably an honorary Summers by this point; Claremont hits a centennial; it’s probably pretty hard to get an unconscious person into tight leather pants; the X-Men finally encounter a world that actually hates and fears them; and the Power Pack fits somewhat uneasily with the grown-up Marvel Universe.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nimrod
  • Uncanny X-Men #193-195
  • Thunderbird II (James Proudstar)
  • Situation-inappropriate attire
  • The worst Hellions
  • Firestar (Angelica Jones)
  • Why you call ahead before breaking into NORAD
  • Leadership
  • Public opinion
  • Juggernaut fights
  • How the X-Men wake up
  • Nazgûl
  • Tyranny of the Masses: The Robot
  • The Voltron Special
  • The Power Pack
  • Navigating crossovers

NEXT WEEK: Firestar!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Support us on Patreon!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 39 – Forever Alone Together

17 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and travel mugs available until 1/11/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
The Amazing Nightcrawler, drawn by The Amazing Sienkiewicz! (New Mutants #22)
Nightcrawler is a pretty awesome teacher; it’d have been cool to see more of him in this capacity. (New Mutants #22)
Aw, Rahne. (New Mutants #22)
Well, that escalated quickly. (New Mutants #22)
AW, RAHNE. (New Mutants #22)
The villains of Rahne’s fairy tale look awfully familiar. (New Mutants #22)
Back to those guys shortly. First: Cats! (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
Ohhhh, hey, it’s Cloak and Dagger! (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
Spider-Man spends a lot of this issue lurking around and providing exposition. (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
“I mean, dude, the title of the book is Marvel Team-Up, not Marvel Let’s Fight in a Church.” (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
“How did you guess you were on a butcher block? I mean, aside from that it’s a big square table and you’re in a slaughterhouse and everything probably smells like blood and… NOPE! DEFINTELY SUPERPOWERS AT WORK!” (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
What?! Dude, it’s not even addictive. That’s the stupidest evil plan ever. (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
This isn’t really relevant to the episode; it’s just hilarious. (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
NONE MORE GOTH (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
Wait, what? (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
‘Kay. (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
Spider-Man’s “Yeah.” in that last panel, though. (Marvel Team-Up Annual #6)
THAT COVER. (New Mutants #23)
“On Wednesdays, we dress glam.” (New Mutants #23)
Harry’s Hideaway is basically the Heartbreak Hotel of Salem Center, but like a million times less awesome. Still awesome, mind, but the Heartbreak Hotel sets a high bar. (New Mutants #23)
It’s really easy to forget that the X-Men are also kind of officially students? Maybe? Sometimes? (New Mutants #23)
At this point, New Mutants is basically the Sam and Dani Show, and we are 100% down with that. (New Mutants #23)
Aw, Rahne. (New Mutants #23)
WELL, THAT CAN’T BE GOOD. (New Mutants #23)
That is… an awfully Demon Bear-looking Sunspot on that cover. Not that we’re complaining, mind. (New Mutants #24)
Now you don’t need to read Marvel Team-Up Annual #6! You’re welcome! (New Mutants #24)
Indulge us in a momentary digression to make note of Magneto’s fancy hair. (New Mutants #24)
Like Rogue, we are firmly on Sam’s team on this one. (New Mutants #24)
Oops. (New Mutants #24)
We’re not sure whose fault they are, but we’re really, really into the way some combination of Claremont, Orzechowski, and Sienkiewicz uses captions and arrows in this book in general, and this spread in particular. (New Mutants #25)
GIANT BLUE XAVIER HEAD! (With some paradoxically good advice, but still. GIANT BLUE XAVIER HEAD!) (New Mutants #25)
‘Kay. (New Mutants #25)
I really want them to just yell “NONE MORE GOTH” every time they teleport away. (New Mutants #25)
Illyana may be sleepy, but she’s not wrong. (New Mutants #25)
NONE MORE GOTH! (New Mutants #25)
NEXT WEEK: We talk to G. Willow Wilson! She talks to us! ALSO: X-MEN!

Links and Further Reading:

  • Information and links to donate toward Bill Mantlo’s ongoing care
    (You can also send physical donations–and cards and letters–addressed as follows:
    Mike Mantlo
    26364 East Pintail Road
    Long Neck, DE 19966
    Please make out any checks to “Michael Mantlo” — Bill’s legal guardian.)
  • The Hero Initiative
  • Waiting for the T is absolutely delightful, and if you’re not already reading it, we acutely envy you the experience of going back through the archives for the first time.
    • (Specifically apropos of the Maximoffs: 1, 2)

39 – Forever Alone Together

8 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints and travel mugs available until 1/11/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and travel mugs available until 1/11/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which Miles and his Doom voice return triumphant; we reach an understanding regarding Lila Cheney; Mob science is pretty shoddy; Magneto has fancy hair; New Mutants Xavier is Best Xavier; no one is more goth than Cloak and Dagger; and you can have Rachel’s Speed Racer references when you pry them from her cold, dead hands.

X-Plained:

  • Spider-Man crossovers
  • Cats
  • Marvel Team-Up Annual #6
  • New Mutants #22-25
  • Phone calls with bears
  • Glam day at the Hellfire Club
  • Rahne’s fairytale
  • Cloak & Dagger
  • Drugs
  • Eldritch curtains
  • A seriously flawed evil plan
  • Harry’s Hideaway
  • The Sam and Dani Show
  • Magneto’s hair
  • Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch’s parentage
  • Waiting for the T
  • Whether Cloak and Dagger are mutants
  • How to buy original art

NEXT WEEK: G. Willow Wilson!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Support us on Patreon!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 37 – Giant-Size Special #1

8 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints available until 1/15 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Well, that’s a hell of an opening. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Remember when Kitty Pryde was scrappy as hell? (God Loves, Man Kills)
We just really love this dialogue. (God Loves, Man Kills)
In which Xavier and Stryker do their best Carter/Reagan. (God Loves, Man Kills)
TEAMWORK! (God Loves, Man Kills)
Whoa. (God Loves, Man Kills)
OH, HELL, YES. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Classic. (God Loves, Man Kills)
If only this had involved his magnetic personality. But no. Just slightly different torture. (God Loves, Man Kills)
WELL, THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Stryker is such a Bond villain. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Um. Wow. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Magneto is so awesome in this story. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Can we talk about how Brent Anderson is one of the all-time great unsung X-artists? Because he really is. (God Loves, Man Kills)
CHARLES, NOOOOOO (God Loves, Man Kills)
Nightcrawler, you lovable scamp. (God Loves, Man Kills)
“It’s okay! He put it back!” (God Loves, Man Kills)
Damn, Stryker. That’s cold.
Cyclops solves problems with ricochets! Take a drink! (God Loves, Man Kills)
He’s not wrong, but damn. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Even if you’ve not read the book, you’ve probably seen this moment referenced at least once. (God Loves, Man Kills)
We have fairly different feelings about the strengths and weaknesses of this layout, but we agree that it is damn stylish. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Didn’t mention this in the episode, but it’s kind of amazing how directly this penultimate scene visually echoes Xavier’s earlier mid-brainwashing encounter with Stryker. (God Loves, Man Kills)
Next Week: Rachel and Chris Sims X-Plain Arcade!

THE 2014 SUPER DOCTOR ASTRONAUT PETER CORBEAU AWARDS FOR EXCELLENCE IN X-CELLENCE

corbeau

  • Best X-Writer – Brian Michael Bendis, for Uncanny X-Men, All-New X-Men, and general line architecture
  • Best X-Artist – Kris Anka, for Uncanny X-Men and general visual and costuming impact
  • Best X-Colorist – Chris Sotomayor, for Cyclops
  • Best X-Letterer (Now and Forever) – Tom Orzechowski, for everything ever forever
  • Jean Grey Award for Creative Resurrection – Nightcrawler (Amazing X-Men)
  • Best New Character – Forget-Me-Not (X-Men Legacy #300)
  • Best Complete Arc – Cyclops #1-5, by Greg Rucka, Russell Dauterman, Chris Sotomayor, Carmen Carnero, et. al.
  • Best Soap Opera – All-New X-Men, by Brian Michael Bendis et. al.
  • Silver Lining Award – Death of Wolverine: The Logan Legacy #4, by Marguerite Bennett, Juan Doe, et. al.
  • Golden Retcon – X-Men: Days of Future Past
  • Irene Adler Award for Most Anticipated Future Run – G. Willow Wilson on X-Men
  • About Damn Time – Storm, by Greg Pak et. al.
  • Cyclops Has a Good Day Award – Wolverine and the X-Men #40, by Jason Aaron, Pepe Larraz, et. al.
  • Best Listeners of Any Podcast Ever – YOU*

*Details of the Corbeau Coloring Contest will go up on Monday, because Rachel’s parents are visiting this weekend. We appreciate your patience.

 

CLASSIC CORBEAUS (for older X-material covered in the podcast during 2014)

  • Harvey and Janet Award for Best Walk-On – The staff and guests of the Heartbreak Hotel
  • Lost Treasure – Beauty and the Beast, by Ann Nocenti, Don Perlin, et. al.
  • Sure, Why Not? – The Leprechauns of Cassidy Keep
  • Still the Best Issue After All These Years – Uncanny X-Men vol. 1 #137

LINKS AND ADDITIONAL READING

37 – Giant-Size Special #1

41 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints available until 1/15 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints available until 1/15 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which we launch our first-ever giant-size special; God Loves, Man Kills is the definitive X-Men story; Bobby makes his R&MXtXM on-air debut; we repopulate the world with X-writers; Rachel is really excited about x-plaining X-Cutioner’s Song; Miles takes a strong stance on Wolverine’s mask; we award some awards; and it’s all your fault.

 

X-Plained

  • God Loves, Man Kills (Marvel Graphic Novel #5)
  • William Stryker
  • An inappropriate analogy
  • Keeping it interesting
  • Favorite episodes
  • Bridging the fan/critic divide
  • Our ongoing obsession with bit characters
  • The challenge of keeping Charles Xavier relevant
  • X-Planation Curation
  • Several stories we’re really looking forward to covering
  • X-Writers on a desert island
  • Internet fights
  • Favorite stories vs. best stories
  • Stupid hats of the Marvel Universe
  • Dr. Doom as Tim Gunn
  • Havok vs. ceiling fans
  • Educational standards of the Marvel Universe
  • The First Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence in X-Cellence

NEXT WEEK: Rachel and Chris Sims X-Plain Arcade

CORRECTION: In this episode, Rachel claims that there is only one Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau in the Marvel Multiverse. This is patently untrue. There are numerous versions of Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau in the Marvel Multiverse, who may or may not be able to combine Voltron-style into a giant Corbeau Singularity.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Support us on Patreon!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 36 – Steal This Podcast

3 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints available in the shop until 12/28, or contact David for the original!
We would really like this cover as a wall-size mural in hour home. ( #1)
Look, dude, you don’t have to like the music, but show some respect. ( #1)
OH HELL YES ( #1)
Lila Motherfuckin’ Cheney. ( #1)
Sam Guthrie is not only the politest minion, he’s the politest superhero. ( #1)
Teleportation by rockin’ guitar solo? YES, PLEASE. ( #1)
Let’s just go ahead and add Larry Niven references to the drinking game, shall we? ( #1)
Warlock takes cosplay really seriously. ( #1)
We’re not entirely sure how Lila Cheney is not a supervillain, but we’ll run with it. ( #1)
AW ( #1)
Remember Kitty’s Fairy Tale? Welcome to Illyana’s Space Opera! ( #8)
It’s s’mores-and-thinly-veiled-allegories night at the X-mansion! ( #8)
That’s a pretty sweet title page, there. ( #8)
Can we talk about Nightcrawler’s amazing disco pirate outfit? ( #8)
Montage! ( #8)
You know what to do. ( #8)
In case there was any doubt that Illyana is basically just mashing up every piece of pop culture she’s encountered… ( #8)
DRAGON SEX. ( #8)
Well, that got weird fast. ( #8)
Some long-awaited resolution. ( #8)
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE ( #8)
Not actually episode-relevant, but we’re gonna take a moment to indulge Rachel’s lettering-geek need to drool over this gorgeous credits bar. ( #8)
Next Week: Giant-Size Special #1–and, at long last, God Loves, Man Kills!

Links:

36 – Steal This Podcast

8 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Lila Cheney Wembley 84
Art by David Wynne. Prints available in the shop until 12/28, or contact David for the original!

In which we play Six Degrees of Lila Cheney; Cannonball gets a makeover; Earth does not in fact blow up; the X-Men like their s’mores with thinly veiled allegories; and Magik dabbles in erotic friend fiction.

X-Plained:

  • Strong Guy
  • Annuals
  • New Mutants Annual #1 (Steal This Planet)
  • Lila Cheney
  • Both versions of Cats Laughing
  • The Vrakanain
  • Chris Claremont Book Club
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual #8 (The Adventures of Lockheed the Space Dragon and His Pet Girl Kitty)
  • Some dubious campfire games
  • Illyana’s Space Opera
  • Space pirate X-Men
  • Some long-awaited resolution

NEXT WEEK: Rachel and Miles’s Giant-Size Special #1, featuring God Loves, Man Kills!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Support us on Patreon!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 34 – Mordenkainen’s Marvelous Mutants

9 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints available here through Sunday, December 14!
Remember when missing twin towers always signified a horrible post-apocalyptic future? (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Rachel Summers, in her Hound uniform. (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Kids, if a necklace you find in a fish talks to you, DON’T LISTEN. (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Oh. You, again. (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Moments when the Hellfire Club and the X-Men just really want to not talk about this and go back to whatever they were doing are pretty much the best X-Men/Hellfire Club moments. (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Lookit all those temporal references! (Uncanny X-Men #189)
Imagining Kid Miles diving into X-Men with this issue: never not funny. (Uncanny X-Men #190)
Well, then. (Uncanny X-Men #190)
But.. isn’t that basically what Vision normally wears? (Uncanny X-Men #190)
Callisto: Pure awesome in any universe. (Uncanny X-Men #190)
What. (Uncanny X-Men #190)
CAPTAIN AMERICA WE LOVE YOU (Uncanny X-Men #190)
This fucking recap page. (Uncanny X-Men #191)
Warlock-o-Vision! (Uncanny X-Men #191)
Remember that time Spider-Man got actually literally crucified in a CCA-approved comic? Because that definitely happened. (Uncanny X-Men #191)
Warlock is not only the best friendly space teenager, but also the best jetpack. (Uncanny X-Men #191)
Oh. That guy. (Uncanny X-Men #191)
LOOK AT THIS ANGRY SPACE ROBOT AND HIS AMAZING TECHNOORGANIC BEARD (Uncanny X-Men #192)
In which the X-Men absolutely fail at hide-and-seek in just about every possible way. (Uncanny X-Men #192)
Not only is Illyana a badass demon sorceress and teleporter, but her taste in movies is impeccable. (Uncanny X-Men #192)
HERE HAVE SOME MORE TECHNOORGANIC SPACE BEARD (Uncanny X-Men #192)
Rogue goes Technarch, is adorable. (Uncanny X-Men #192)
SPAAAAAAAAACE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEARD (Uncanny X-Men #192)
He’s such a parent. (Uncanny X-Men #192)
Don’t worry. Later, the Morlocks find him, fix him up, and dress him in elaborate bondage gear. (Uncanny X-Men #192)
MERRY CHRISTMAS, X-MEN! (Uncanny X-Men #192)
Next week: Welcome to the Heartbreak Hotel.

Links and Further Reading:

  • In Episode 34, we answered a question from a listener looking for textual evidence that Nightcrawler isn’t homophobic (we pointed them to Amazing X-Men #13). Rachel also discussed that question from a different angle–and at considerably more length–on the blog.
  • Diana: Warrior Princess is both an incredibly fun game setting and a brilliant piece of cultural satire.
  • We are big fans of both the Gamers movies and the humans responsible for them.
  • Rachel and Elle talk a lot of shit about Hank Pym in Episode 4 of Into It.

34 – Mordenkainen’s Marvelous Mutants

32 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Warlock The Barbarian
Art by David Wynne. Prints available here through Sunday, December 14!

In which we venture forth into an age undreamed of, there are so many reasons to have Northstar on your team, Selene is the worst guest, Rachel X-Plains Conan, Cyttorak is the Mordenkainen of the Marvel Universe, Miles loves Doctor Strange, we have some fairly serious Captain America feelings, the X-Men completely fail at hide-and-seek, and we make more D&D references in one episode than in the previous 34 combined.

X-Plained

  • Northstar
  • Beard privilege
  • X-Men 189-192
  • Anachronistic timeline markers
  • Hounds
  • The Culture Shock Class
  • An Age Undreamed of
  • Conan disambiguation
  • Red Sonja vs. Red Sonya
  • Kulan Gath
  • Marvel Team-Up #79
  • Barbarian Avengers
  • Why we love Captain America
  • Several haircuts
  • WiFi sorcery
  • A really good inspirational speech
  • The inevitable cephalopod revolution
  • Why Hank Pym is the absolute worst
  • Claudication
  • Hide-and-seek
  • How Rachel Summers actually traveled back in time
  • Magus
  • Warlock, Adam Warlock, and their respective Magi
  • Politics, religion, and Nightcrawler

Edited to Add: In this episode, we answered a question from a listener looking for textual evidence that Nightcrawler isn’t homophobic (we pointed them to Amazing X-Men #13). We also discussed that question from a different angle–and at considerably more length–on the blog.

Next Week: Dazzler: The Movie!

You can find a visual companion to the episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Support us on Patreon!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!