Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Phoenix

As Mentioned in Episode 136 – Fill-In Frenzy!

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints, cards, and coffee mugs available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
(We also made a coffee mug, because, I mean, LOOK AT THIS.)
This is a demigod who loves his work. (New Mutants #81)
Backlighting: the difference between camp and divinity. (New Mutants #81)
You almost gotta feel sorry for the guy. Almost (New Mutants #81)
Look at that face. He’s so happy. Like a golden retriever who loves crime. (New Mutants #81)
Encasing people in molten rock kind of seems like the opposite of a rescue, but, sure, go for it. (New Mutants #81)
Aw. (New Mutants #81)
Don’t worry. They die on the next page. (Excalibur #20)
…’Kay. (Excalibur #20)
Not cool, Megan. (Excalibur #20)
Ron Lim’s CB isn’t just a cad, he’s a super-cad! (Excalibur #20)
THIS BAR THO (Excalibur #20)
There’s… there’s a lot going on here. (Excalibur #20)
This damn issue. (Excalibur #20)
She looks so happy about her not-a-pep-talk! (Excalibur #20)
That about covers it, yes. (X-Factor #47)
AUGH (X-Factor #47)
Arch-Bat-Angel-Man. (X-Factor #47)
In his parents’ defense, he did reanimate their dead dog. (X-Factor #47)
This guy. (X-Factor #47)
After looking like evil Zonker Harris, Greg’s secondary superpower is irony. (X-Factor #47)
We may have hit peak Warren Worthington III. (X-Factor #47)
Sensible kids! (X-Factor #47)

LINKS & FURTHER READING

136 – Fill-In Frenzy

25 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Prints, cards, and coffee mugs available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints, cards, and coffee mugs available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which we find the idea of Jack Kirby as G-d deeply comforting; “Jercules” is our new favorite insult; the difference between camp and divinity is good backlighting; Zeus does not have the moral high ground; Ron Lim’s Captain Britain is the definitive cad; the Demon Druid is the saddest supervillain; Archangel broods like it’s his day job; and Jay gets to do all the fun voices for once.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Upstarts
  • An inflatable Batman
  • New Mutants #81
  • Excalibur #20
  • X-Factor #47
  • Our favorite Magma story
  • The best insult
  • Pugilistic impunity
  • A context-inappropriate oath
  • The worst film festival
  • Fighting fire with Magma
  • The Demon Druid
  • A Satanic pirate tavern
  • Reactorhenge
  • The depths of fuchsia
  • Archangel’s deeply weird comfort mechanisms
  • Some dude named Greg
  • Publishing delays

NEXT WEEK: Lady Mandarin, feat. Sarah Kuhn

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

Buy prints (or mugs) of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 135 – Kurt Wagner, Warlord of Mars

5 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Best cover, or best cover? (Nah, the best cover is Excalibur #4, but this one is pretty darn good, too.) (Excalibur #16)
Whoops. (Excalibur #16)
I’m throwing in some episode-irrelevant bonus swashbuckling this week, because that’s how much I love you. (Excalibur #16)
SO THERE. (Excalibur #16)
See?! Rachel’s barbarian-warrior costume is TOTALLY P.E.N.I.S.-five! (Excalibur #16)
See also: that one scene from Ghostbusters. (Excalibur #16)
Those are some very well-drawn tentacles. (Excalibur #16)
Remember that one time Kitty Pryde straight-up stabbed someone in the back? BECAUSE THAT HAPPENED. (Excalibur #16)
This is the last Alan Davis cover we’ll see for a while. Please join me in a moment of silent mourning. (Excalibur #17)
Much disguise very mystery. (Excalibur #17)
There is… a lot going on in these two panels. (Excalibur #17)
Except, wait, if this is just a super distant planet, then this ISN’T alt-Jean, except it still sort of is, and there’s also the Lockheed and OH GOD WHAT’S EVEN HAPPENING (Excalibur #17)
FUCK. YEAH. RACHEL. (Excalibur #17)
Nigel Frobisher: a jerk in any universe. (Excalibur #17)
You tried. (Excalibur #17)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #17)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE (Excalibur #17)
It’s like Freaky Friday, but only halfway. Vaguely Abnormal Friday. (Excalibur #18)
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: I would like to lodge my official complaint regarding this shameless waste of Speed Racer homage. Yrs., Jay Edidin (Excalibur #18)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #18)
NOTHING WILL EVER BE OKAY AGAIN. (Excalibur #18)
Jamie is a creep, but his powers are super cool. (Excalibur #18)
I got nothing. (Excalibur #18)
False-flag X-Men covers are kind of a running joke in this series. (Excalibur #19)
NOPE. (Excalibur #19)
Oh, Emma. (Excalibur #19)
Well, that’s unsettling on a lot of levels. (Excalibur #19)
“And then I’m going to feed you ice chips while you’re asleep!” (Excalibur #19)
NEXT EPISODE: Fill-In Frenzy!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

135 – Kurt Wagner, Warlord of Mars (Cross-Time Caper, Part 2)

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which the Cross-Time Caper continues; alliteration is awesome; someone else’s geopolitical conflict is not an appropriate place to play out your pirate fantasies; we are definitely not actually going to eat Alan Davis’s brains; Jamie Braddock is Evil Rex Racer; Widget eats a car; Rick Leonardi is the definitive fill-in artist; the problem is patriarchy; and everything’s sticky in Madripoor.

X-PLAINED:

  • X-Manga
  • Excalibur #16-19
  • Crosstime
  • A John Carter riff
  • A mysterious and dubiously reliable narrator
  • A terrible pick-up line
  • Kymri
  • Anjulie
  • Gender-neutral fantasy armor
  • Implicit fellatio in several media
  • Space Fred Savage
  • An alternate Jean Grey (and her untimely demise)
  • Tullamore Voge
  • A grand tourney
  • A deeply disappointing pastiche
  • ORZ-1
  • Dirty Pair (and a sustained riff thereon)
  • What makes a train sexy
  • Wolverine’s table manners
  • Jim Jaspers vs. Jamie Braddock vs. Jamie Jeffers

NEXT EPISODE: Fill-In Frenzy!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 133 – Feisty Little Fellow from the Stars

One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
YAYBO! We’re launching our brand new TeePublic shop with a brand new design from artist Scott Koblish and designer Dylan Todd!
You’re hearing this in the Strangers’ voices from Dark City, too, right? (X-Factor #48)
I, however, am thoroughly impressed. Look at that snazzy Kirby-designed dude! (X-Factor #48)
Including this panel mostly for ZZ-105’s adorable flailing. (X-Factor #48)
Aw, man, Beast. Never change. I mean, I guess aside from the extended series of self-induced mutations. (X-Factor #48)
Well, that’s awkward on a lot of levels. (X-Factor #48)
Iceman’s core personality traits involve both reluctance to kill and overcompensating like whoa. (X-Factor #49)
“Tell you what–I won’t tell the others about ‘Wugga Wugga Wugga’ if you don’t mention the hat.” (X-Factor #49)
Ship is such a good bro. (X-Factor #49)
SMASH THE STATE! (X-Factor #49)
Look at that creepy little smirk! (X-Factor #50)
It wouldn’t be X-Factor without some good old-fashioned baby theft! (X-Factor #50)
NO SPACE GODS NO SPACE MASTERS (X-Factor #50)
WOW. (X-Factor #50)
“Knowledge–and twenty-seven hours of smooth jazz classics!” (X-Factor #50)
Meanwhile, this nonsense. (X-Factor #50)
NEXT EPISODE: Live from VVCBF. And yes, the guitar gets played.

133 – Feisty Little Fellow from the Stars (Judgment War, Part 2)

23 comments

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x133

In which the plot thickens; Jay and Miles fix Avatar; Ship is a good bro; you are in space right now; the Beginagains go full This Island Earth; Cyclops weaponizes love; voting is really important; and you’re listening to ten straight hours of soft jazz and subversion on ZZ-105

X-PLAINED:

  • The other Dazzler (Bertram Worthington)
  • Our newest t-shirt
  • X-Factor #48-50
  • A metaphor within a metaphor, in space
  • The first half of Judgment War (briefly) (again)
  • A prisoner exchange
  • Hairstyles of the possessed and famous
  • Proper use of Cable
  • A case for retcons
  • Iceman vs. Archangel
  • A feisty little fellow from the stars
  • The secret origin of Ship
  • The Celestials
  • The core of Iceman’s personality
  • Several kisses
  • Beast and the Rejects
  • Some terrible hats
  • An unfair fight
  • A nefarious plot
  • Contagious heroism
  • Arishem
  • The power of love
  • Why we use the word “queer”
  • Several theoretical and unlikely crossovers

NEXT EPISODE: Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival, with musical guest Scott Koblish!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 129 – They Don’t Allow Dragons in Here

5 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Lockheed, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore. (Excalibur #12)
Spoiler: this ends exactly the way you’d expect it to. (Excalibur #12)
This guy. (Excalibur #12)
IT’S SUCH A GOOD SIGHT GAG! (Excalibur #12)
Fisticuffs! (Excalibur #12)
This series has the best covers, man. (Excalibur #13)
Swell new threads, Cap! (Excalibur #13)
Princess Kitty, now 100% more bland. (Excalibur #13)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #13)
THIS IS NOT A GOOD FOUNDATION FOR A RELATIONSHIP. Also, I’m pretty sure they’re both, like, fourteen. (Excalibur #13)
Another classic. (Excalibur #14)
I’m not saying he’s not, but… (Excalibur #14)
Whoa, dang. (Excalibur #14)
Oh. THAT guy. (Excalibur #14)
The more you know! (Excalibur #14)
Swell new threads, Meggan! (Excalibur #14)
I always remember Albert being in this scene, which he’s obviously not, because he didn’t exist yet. Go figure. -J (Excalibur #14)
It’s like the dog ending of Silent Hill II, but instead of shibas, you get Chris Claremont and John Byrne. (Excalibur #14)
You tell ’em, Galactus! (Excalibur #14)
Look, we get what you were going for, but, no. (Excalibur #12)
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. (Excalibur #13)
You can go home now. We’ve hit single greatest panel of Excalibur, ever. (Excalibur #15)
Ah, “the old-fashioned way.” (Excalibur #15)
MEANWHILE… (Excalibur #15)
AND THEN… (Excalibur #15)
Jamie Jaspers is terrifying. (Excalibur #15)
LATER… (Excalibur #15)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE. (Excalibur #15)
NEXT EPISODE: Killing the X-Men, with Charles Soule!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

129 – They Don’t Allow Dragons in Here (The Cross-Time Caper, Part 1)

44 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which “Cross-Time Caper” is something of a misnomer; Excalibur is an awful lot of fun to summarize; none of us will ever live up to Oscar Wilde’s expectations; Captain Britain secretly derives his powers from genre; sometimes things turn out to be simple; Kitty Pryde is better at everything than you; manipulation and murder are the new flowers and candy; context may or may not ruin everything; Meggan gets a new outfit; Technet takes Brighton; and some universes are just too silly to survive.

X-PLAINED:

  • Rick Jones, Sidekick Supreme
  • The Cross-Time Caper
  • Excalibur #12-15
  • Three love triangles
  • Jay’s mom’s late iguana
  • Captain Marshall, Lord Champion of the Realm
  • Prince William
  • Butch the ogre
  • Princess Kate
  • Fisticuffs
  • Instant air conditioning, Excalibur-style
  • Bagpipe Vader
  • An anticlimactic solution to a protracted problem
  • Sorcery 101
  • Several profoundly unethical ways to initiate a relationship
  • Arrested Excalibur
  • The Campsite Rule of relationships
  • The logistics and social history of tarring and feathering
  • A protracted parody
  • A very large number and several names for it
  • A theoretical team-up
  • Ultimate Hunger
  • An unidentified comic that is not Ultimate Hunger
  • Some less-than-ideal creative choices
  • A multiversal montage
  • Jamie Braddock (more) (again)
  • A duck
  • The unenviable fate of Doctor Crocodile
  • Pairing mutants with metal genres
  • Inconsistent flight safety measures

NEXT EPISODE: Killing the X-Men, with Charles Soule

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 128 – A Stupid Way to Die (Judgment War, Part 1)

2 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Jean, I know busting through walls is an X-Factor thing, but some walls are there for a reason. (X-Factor #43)
The Kirbiest of Kirby designs! (X-Factor #43)
Throwing this one in for scale. Celestials are big. (X-Factor #43)
A Stupid Way to Die: The Scott Summers Story. (X-Factor #43)
Aw, man. Monster babies are the best babies. (X-Factor #44)
Seems like a fair trade. (X-Factor #44)
Damn, but that’s satisfying. Not quite punching-a-pterosaur satisfying, but still not half bad. (X-Factor #45)
Of Jean’s three personalities, Maddy is the only one familiar with how hairbrushes work. (X-Factor #46)
NEXT EPISODE: The Cross-Time Caper begins!

128 – A Stupid Way to Die (Judgment War, Part 1)

35 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which X-Factor goes to space; Miles gets judgmental about spelling; Paul Smith returns to an X-title; Celestials are a pain; Judgment War is the Star-Trekkiest story that doesn’t actually involve Star Trek; monster ladies are super important; if you can be a green dude, you should be a green dude; and Cyclops gears up to fight some gods.

X-PLAINED:

  • One way to kill a Celestial
  • Judg(e)ment War
  • Drunk Mark Trail
  • X-Factor #43-46
  • Walls you should maybe not bust through even if you’re X-Factor
  • A completely inappropriate show pitch
  • Celestials
  • The true secret purpose of Ship
  • The Chosen
  • The Rejects
  • Dualers
  • Perfect Seera
  • Rask
  • Zarka
  • Monster ladies in cultural context
  • Lev
  • A stupid way to die
  • Jammers
  • Plot-relevant amnesia
  • The Most Perfect
  • ZZ-105
  • Baby theft (more)(again)
  • Ryest
  • The Beginagains
  • Whether and when there’ll be another all-question episode
  • The current status of the Jean Grey school

NEXT EPISODE: The Cross-Time Caper begins!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!