Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: murder

As Mentioned in Episode 407 – Freshening Up

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(He is not in fact here to help.) (X-Factor #138)
Heh. Omega Red, man. (X-Factor #138)
The most threatening destroyed football you’ll see today. (X-Factor #138)
THAT IS AN EXCELLENT QUESTION. (X-Factor #138)
(Spoiler: That’s Mystique.) (X-Factor #138)
A delightful cover. (X-Factor #139)
This whole sequence is so good. (X-Factor #139)
Ever is weird, and I say that with all respect and admiration! (X-Factor #139)
Dark Beast DEFINITELY has multiple candy-colored iMacs. (X-Factor #139)
Mystique: once again mother of the year. (X-Factor #139)
The preceding page literally had a Slaughterhouse Five reference, and I’m kind of annoyed about it. (X-Factor #140)
Fixx, Greystone, and Archer. (X-Factor #140)
A guy who is probably not Cable. (He’s not; he’s an alternate-future Forge.) (X-Factor #140)
Batman. (X-Factor #140)
There are actually *multiple* people huffing frogs, if you look closely. (X-Factor #141)
SERIOUSLY WHY WOULD YOU EVER TRUST THIS MAN (X-Factor #141)
THE PLOT THICKENS (X-Factor #141)
NEXT EPISODE: Bishop: X.S.E.!

LINKS & FURTHER TIME SINKS

407 – Freshening Up

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In which X-Factor bounces from one rock-bottom to another; Sabretooth gets his (murderous) groove back; Dark Beast embraces the iMac aesthetic; the tip was righteous; Mystique multitasks like a pro; and Shard Bishop has come unstuck in time.

X-PLAINED:

  • X-Nation
  • What X-Factor’s been up to
  • X-Factor #138-141
  • Omega Red (again)
  • The Brotherhood’s new hideout
  • Mallory Brickman
  • Miles and/or Ralph Brickman
  • Gloria Brickman
  • “Freshening up”
  • Mystique, but a sitcom
  • Agent Vargas
  • Ever
  • The secret purpose of Havok’s Brotherhood
  • Exhumes vs. emplates
  • Fixx
  • Greystone
  • Archer
  • The X.U.E.
  • Bantam
  • Leisure activities
  • What would happen if the T-O virus took over Cable’s body
  • What we want from X-Men #700

NEXT EPISODE: Bishop: X.S.E.

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As Mentioned in Episode 397 – Mürdr at IKEA

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Daydreamers this is not. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
Chop Chop’s weapon is a machete, Yuri’s weapon is his fist, and artist Frank Teran’s weapon is the color black. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
I wish Wild Child and Bob Hoskins always looked like this. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
Sabretooth and Wild Child may look similar in close-up, but there’s never a question of who’s who. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
When less detail equals more horror. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR GIVING YOUR BAR THAT NAME (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
Yes! Use more black, Frank Teran! More! (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
Scrrfffle. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
Wild Child is shadowed like a villain… until he isn’t. (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
What are the odds?! (Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1)
That guy’s mustache is no match for Psychic Paper. (X-Factor #136)
The iPhone 14 Pro’s cameras ain’t got nothin’ on these. (X-Factor #136)
Have you ever noticed that RAD and HAM have the same number of letters? (X-Factor #136)
WAT (X-Factor #136)
Jeff Matsuda stole some of Frank Teran’s black and is using it well. (X-Factor #136)
Put that towel down! You know you don’t sweat! (X-Factor #136)
“Huh?” is right. (X-Factor #136)
This seems way less efficient than leaving a voicemail. (X-Factor #136)
I HAVE QUESTIONS (X-Factor #137)
Best exes. (X-Factor #137)
It’s a little thing, but I like the symbolism of the seemingly arbitrary background shapes. (X-Factor #137)
It’s a credit to Mystique that she can be legitimately scary while wearing that. (X-Factor #137)
Again with the implied gore. (X-Factor #137)
Of course, honey. Of course. (X-Factor #137)
NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men return from space!

397 – Mürdr at IKEA

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Al Kennedy and Miles enter a somewhat post-OZT world, the art of Frank Teran (whose uncle built a jetpack) elevates an otherwise merely decent story, Puck is played by Bob Hoskins, Wild Child gets a chance to shine, Mystique and Forge are sitting in a tree, and Swamp Thing is amazing.

X-PLAINED:

  • Spider-Man’s head cold
  • Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1
  • Sabretooth (Victor Creed)
  • Wild Child (Kyle Gibney)
  • Horrible violence, expertly implied
  • The ubiquity of sewers
  • Saturday morning cartoons of R-rated movies
  • Serial killers with G.I. Joe names
  • Improbable tracking
  • Bilingual crime
  • Chekhov’s waterfall
  • DRUGS
  • X-Factor #136-137
  • The Hound program
  • Skeumorphism
  • Doctor Valerie Cooper and Major Edmond Atkinson, excellent exes
  • Questionable wound-dressing
  • Holograms
  • Government jobs
  • The sad fate of the Chase family
  • Nimrod disambiguation
  • The Marvel Universe According to Doctor Seuss

NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men return from space!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 332 – Gideon Falls

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Domino is extremely dedicated to her stretching routine, I guess? (X-Force #52)
Not someone you want to fight. (X-Force #52)
I like to think he fell straight out of a board meeting in that outfit. (X-Force #52)
Um, I think you mean “Crule Rules!” (X-Force #53)
YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN ABOUT THAT CIRCULAR MOTIF? (X-Force #53)
None of these are Keyser Soze. (X-Force #54)
She’s evil, yeah; but she’s very good at swooping. (X-Force #54)
The coolest guy in junior high. (X-Force #54)
OH NO (X-Force #54)
NEXT EPISODE: Just the usual Wednesday on the PATH.

332 – Gideon Falls

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Swimsuit Catalog is not an actual style of martial arts; Onslaught dabbles in vandalism; Crule is a special guy; we identify briefly with X-Force; and Charles Xavier is the Keyser Soze of Onslaught.

X-PLAINED:

  • Externals on Krakoa
  • Relative levels of violence in X-books
  • X-Force #52-54
  • Camp Hayden, KY
  • Onslaught-facilitated power-ups
  • Gideon (again)
  • At least one apparent death
  • How it feels to be us
  • Businesswear
  • Whether Cannonball is an external
  • Nazis in the Captain Britain Corps
  • Doop

NEXT EPISODE: Sinister vs. Public Transit

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 328 – Single Blue Male

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
It’s not baseball, but it’ll do! (X-Men #48)
It’s rough to be Bishop. (X-Men #48)
The extra arms make it extra funny. (X-Men #48)
*Rimshot* (X-Men #48)
Dark Beast X-Plains Bishop. (X-Men #48)
Bishop, that’s flirting. (X-Men #49)
“Bishop with Kittens” should be a thing. (X-Men #49)
This one’s for Douglas Wolk. (X-Men #49)
Never trust anybody. (X-Men #49)
Except by the time it happens, they look way more alike. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank McCoy was an objectively kind of terrible child. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
This would be so fun to climb around! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank, buddy, no. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Honestly, I’d prefer a toaster. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
What the HELL, dude? (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Time to face the… nope. I’m not gonna do it. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, MCCOY! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Man vs. Excalibur!

328 – Single Blue Male

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Sam Guthrie will take all your money; Gambit has exceptionally poor judgment; having friends who are couples means getting to be the big spoon AND the little spoon; Hank McCoy is the agrarian Rube Goldberg; and there are a lot of ways to appreciate a comic.

X-PLAINED:

  • Several colors of Beast
  • X-Men #48-49
  • X-Men Unlimited #10
  • The Floating Super Hero Poker Game
  • Large hands
  • Various refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Surge(TM)
  • Pam Greenwood (Fatale)
  • Many gratuitous murders
  • Iconic runs we’re not into
  • Generations of teen X-Men

NEXT WEEK: Hawk talk!

NEXT EPISODE: Nate Grey vs. Excalibur!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 315 – Theater Is Dead

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
That Wolverine shadow looming over the title has a serious Maurice Sendak vibe. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1)
I know the whole point is for the shadow to be menacing, but how funny would it be if Wolverine were just freakin’ huge in this series, for no reason? (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1)
Don’t smoke in the Danger Room, Gambit. It’s not supposed to be THAT kind of danger! (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1)
This is a good version of Gambit; I will give the series and Sale that much. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1)
I dunno; the exploding cards might make that difficult. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1)
SEE WHAT I MEAN?! (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #2)
Viper called; she wants to know what you did with her entire look. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #2)
YES, LOGAN, IT MATTERS VERY MUCH. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #2)
Well, then. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #2)
I’m pretty sure the subtext here is that Gambit’s gonna do a sex with that painting. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #3)
The end. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #3)
X-Men ’92 did it better. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #4)
Mastermind X-Plains the plot. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #4)
Dudes, man. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #4)
That’s certainly one take on Sarte. (Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Hawk Talk!

LINKS & FURTHER CRIMES:

315 – Theater Is Dead

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay and/or patriarchy ruin everything; Archangel is dubiously aspirational; we need a moratorium on Jack the Ripper stories; there are a lot of Masterminds; and Arcade is a whole bundle of psychosexual weirdness.

X-PLAINED:

  • Tom Malverne (Jack the Ripper)
  • Lunch
  • Wolverine and Gambit: Victims #1-4
  • Loeb & Sale
  • Jack the Ripper in fiction
  • Alexandra Davies
  • Fun on international flights
  • That one time Jay thought the NSA was going to come for him
  • Martinique Wyngarde (Mastermind II)
  • Mastermind, Mastermind, and Lady Mastermind disambiguation
  • Collateral damage
  • Various Dies Hard
  • Several heists
  • Several hallucinations
  • Variations on the death of Miss Locke
  • Problematic third brothers

NEXT EPISODE: Hawk Talk!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!