magneto – Page 6 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

347 – Onslaught Begins

September 26, 2021 Jay 14 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we stop procrastinating and dive headfirst into Onslaught; Professor Xavier is a jerk; Dark Beast wasn’t even supposed to be here today; Onslaught declaims like it’s the Silver Age; Bishop gets some long-awaited closure; and we pitch alternate candidates for the X-traitor.

X-PLAINED:

Hyperstorm
Onslaught (entity)
Onslaught (event)
Uncanny X-Men #334
X-Men #54
Onslaught: X-Men #1
How to pronounce “Buccellato”
The opposite of a pep talk
Nate Grey vs. Professor X
The Z’noxx (again)
One of several times Charles Xavier has faked his own death
Muscle March
Franklin Richards
The Gem of Cyttorak
A villain speech
That one recording Bishop found in the future
The X-traitor
Li’l Charlie
Magneto’s hood ornament
Alternate takes on the X-traitor

NEXT EPISODE: Onslaught continues.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 324 – Snack Attack

February 28, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

So, yeah, there’s a lot going on. (Generation X Annual 1995)

Not who they appear to be, which honestly doesn’t even really matter in context. (Generation X Annual 1995)

His sovereignty over the Hellfire Club is dubious, but he’s definitely the king of shade. (Generation X Annual 1995)

Ouch. (Generation X Annual 1995)

Wait, what? (Generation X Annual 1995)

I still can’t tell if this is him not knowing she kidnapped him or telling her that it’s fine that she did… (Generation X Annual 1995)

Well, that’s some Silent Hill-inflected creepiness. (Generation X Annual 1995)

This party is an odd mix of formality levels. (Generation X #10)

Look, it happens to all of us eventually. (Generation X #10)

We would read the HELL out of a series about Banshee’s Interpol adventures. (Generation X #10)

OH HEY WE KNOW THAT DUDE (Generation X #10)

They are a genuinely fun pair. (Generation X #10)

NEXT EPISODE: MOTHERFUCKIN’ GHOST PIRATES!

324 – Snack Attack

February 21, 2021 Jay 18 comments

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In which Cordelia Frost is a terrible friend; Mondo is better than the story arcs that surround him; and we’d really love to see a series about Sean Cassidy’s super groovy past.

X-PLAINED:

The one who got away
Generation X Annual 1995
Generation X #10-11
A failed seduction attempt
Mondo and a plant-based facsimile thereof
An emergency
The very personal and private journal of Monet St. Croix
A party
Omega Red (again)
Sean Cassidy’s Interpol days
An unlikely informant
A somewhat surreal monitoring system
The Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men Wiki

NEXT EPISODE: GHOST PIRATES!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 322 – Do More Crimes

February 6, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Never let Gambit take you anywhere. (X-Men #46)

Jean, seriously, do you have any idea how old your niece and nephew are? (X-Men #46)

Bobby, no. (X-Men #46)

We have X-Babies. This is not a drill. (X-Men #46)

Charming, ain’t they? (X-Men #46)

Wait… who?! (X-Men #46)

HI, DAZZLER! (X-Men #47)

This whole issue feels kind of like a Western, helped along by this incredibly classic framing. (Uncanny X-Men #327)

“Okay, but also, your face is melting.” (Uncanny X-Men #327)

OH SNAP denied (Uncanny X-Men #327)

This is legitimately adorable. (Uncanny X-Men #327)

“Y’know… stuff.” (Uncanny X-Men #327)

NEXT WEEK: Hawk talk!

NEXT EPISODE: SOMEHOW, EVEN MORE X-BABIES!

LINKS & FURTHER MISDIRECTION:

True Believer: The Rise and Fall of Stan Lee, by Abraham Riesman, will be out February 16!

322 – Do More Crimes

January 31, 2021 Jay 18 comments

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In which the X-Babies fail to charm; clones are people, too; Iceman doesn’t (quite) come out; Gambit and Bishop bond; Joseph comes into ambiguous being; and Principal Nezu and Charles Xavier would probably get along okay.

X-PLAINED:

Inconsistent quality
X-Men #46-47
Uncanny X-Men #327
The X-Babies (more) (again)
Sfogliatelle
Gog
Gog’n’Magog
Politics of the Mojoverse
Personhood of constructed entities
What makes an X-Babies story work
Jay’s favorite episodes of The Muppet Show
Age-appropriate literature
Fictional books
Fun with Bishop
Several restaurants
Hypothetical casting
What Magneto’s been up to
Joseph
Sister Maria
Why Magneto gets de-aged a lot
Amnesia
Various orphans and individuals affiliated therewith
How to keep up with upcoming X-titles
A cross-media friendship
True Believer: The Rise and Fall of Stan Lee

NEXT EPISODE: HAWK TALK

THE ONE AFTER THAT: MORE X-BABIES SO MANY X-BABIES

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 300 – Götterdämmerung

July 5, 2020 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Trust us–it looks better on foil. (X-Men: Omega)

Those skulls can’t be stable. (X-Men: Omega)

The gang’s mostly here! (X-Men: Omega)

[Cries in Dark Phoenix Saga] (X-Men: Omega)

Truly, he has been preparing for this moment for his entire life.

It’s cute how Nate assumes that it’s possible to talk Magneto out of fighting anybody, ever. (X-Men: Omega)

I’d like to imagine that the M’Kraan crystal made the conscious choice not to show her Onslaught. (X-Men: Omega)

YES! (X-Men: Omega)

Just, um, imagine that he’s holding a gun and also using his powers out of… enthusiasm? For the gun? I guess? (X-Men: Omega)

“Wait, are you the angry Claremontean narrator?!” (X-Men: Omega)

It’s okay. He’ll be back in about 14 years. (X-Men: Omega)

Nobody expects an ongoing series! (X-Men: Omega)

And that, as they say, is that. (X-Men: Omega)

NEXT EPISODE: Back in the 616!

LINKS & FURTHER EPICS:

Janet K. Lee makes really, really gorgeous comics and other art.
A lot of the episodes we mentioned are in the roundup from our 5th anniversary episode.
You can hear more about Jay’s chickens-in-law in Hawk Talk: Florida Mans

300 – Götterdämmerung

July 5, 2020 Jay 11 comments

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In which the Age of Apocalypse comes to an end; Angel briefly lives up to his potential; Bishop was sometimes right; It’s not a climactic ending without an X-Men #137 reference; Colossus breaks our hearts; X-Men: Marvels Snapshot will be out in September; and somehow we have made 300 of these things.

X-PLAINED:

Beast vs. Dark Beast
X-Men: Omega
The entirety of the (first) Age of Apocalypse
Potpourri vs. incense
Dramatic hair
Many, many errors
Unforeseen consequences
A long-anticipated team-up
Many deaths
Art as artifact
Narration that has haunted Jay for 20 years
One of the more persistent deaths of David Haller
Blast Attack
The end of a world
Refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
Our favorite X-milestone issues
Theoretical teams
Orphans
When X-Men: Marvels Snapshot is actually coming out
Our favorite show bits
How Jay’s chickens-in-law are doing

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Prime

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

June 28, 2020 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

For full effect, there really needs to be an inset panel of Storm mugging at the reader. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

Forge is a JERK. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

What the hell kind of weird drills does this universe have? (What If? vol. 2 #77)

It’s weird that there’s a universe where both of these kids exist. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

I wonder if the Phoenix designs new costumes every time; and, if so, what its aesthetic phases have been. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

Is this page foreshadowing a Days of Future Past-style dystopia? Discuss. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

No, seriously, he JUST KEEPS SAYING IT. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

That hair. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Brother Voodoo X-Plains the premise. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Uncalled for, Ben. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Damnit, Nate. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Just had to work it in again, huh? (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

The costume just isn’t the same without metal wings. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

DAMNIT, NATE. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Why does Magneto look kind of like Keanu Reeves here? (What If? vol. 2 #81)

The more I look at the art from this issue, the angrier I get about it. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

[cries in comics editor] (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Galactus is a poet, and he didn’t even know it! (He knew it.) (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Relatable sentiment. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Hello, mid-1990s CG. You… sure do exist. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

NEXT EPISODE: The end of a world. (Also, #300? So, that’s a thing.)

LINKS & FURTHER HYPOTHETICALS

You can hear all about Be X-Tra Safe With the X-Men in Episode 177 – The Less You Know.
Read Teen Vogue. Seriously.
You can see the Havok Care Bear–along with the Cyclops one that Jay made–over here.
Waiting for the Trade Magneto is the One True Magneto, now and forever.

299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

June 28, 2020 Jay 15 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which some universes are more pleasant than others; Havok is basically a Care Bear; Wolverine is a P.R. nightmare; Nate Grey tries; stealth is not among the Silver Surfer’s strengths; Night Thrasher ascends to godhood; Jay and Miles dive down the What If rabbit hole.

X-PLAINED:

Earth-200500 (again)
Earth-42409
What If? vol. 2 #77
What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse
What If? vol. 2 #81
Earth-77995
Fashion editorials
One of the worse versions of Forge
Superheroes x fashion
Care Bears vs. X-Men
The Hellfire Club of Earth-77995
A surprisingly normal Grey-Summers family
Several uses for the Phoenix Force
Worst-case scenarios
Earth-93074
Savage Land home ec
Bad choices
The Defenders of Earth-93074
How to manipulate Nate Grey
Narrative benefits of omnipotence
A time loop
Earth-9601
A meeting on the moon
What the Watcher watches
Galactus
The Silver Surfer
Grandpa Magneto
Some remarkable technology
A heavy-handed metaphor
Our takes on What If scenarios
The Corbeau-Grey scale of decision making
Storm’s eyes
Our character voices

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Omega

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This June, we’ll be donating all of the profits to Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 296 – Hard Choices

May 31, 2020 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

“Are you coming too, mysterious hooded stranger? My sister, Carmen Sandiego, would love to have you along!” (Amazing X-Men #1)

Danger Room cold open, Earth-295-style! (Amazing X-Men #1)

“Just a few more hours and a few dozen more cigarettes until Tom Waits karaoke night!” (Amazing X-Men #1)

“For further details, my X-Men, you must buy every other X-comic on the stands. Excelsior!” (Amazing X-Men #1)

As the famous thinker Parappa the Rapper once so wisely said: you gotta believe. (Amazing X-Men #1)

Earth-295 Sentinels may be lacking in toboggan hats and robot one-piece swimsuits, but they’re still pretty impressive. (Amazing X-Men #1)

Half unspooled VHS tape, half Slinky, all nuisance. (Amazing X-Men #2)

“Go easy on ’em, X-Men – they remembered to use our logo font, and that was very considerate of them.” (Amazing X-Men #2)

Banshee’s facial expression speaks for us all. (Amazing X-Men #2)

Okay, that’s legit terrifying. (Amazing X-Men #2)

Quicksilver? More like FRIPsilver! (Amazing X-Men #2)

If the title wasn’t already taken, Magneto’s autobiography would be called The Brood Saga. (Amazing X-Men #3)

It takes a true villain to make “being stretchy” an intimidating superpower. (Amazing X-Men #3)

Mary Poppins: The Snyder Cut. (Amazing X-Men #3)

Shaking Angel down for information is an X-Men rite of passage. (Amazing X-Men #3)

Open wide and say “flashback”! (Amazing X-Men #3)

you guys I think I’m in the wrong church (Amazing X-Men #4)

This may be bad, but at least he doesn’t have to die of a mutant-targeting virus twice in the Age of Apocalypse the way he does in Earth-616… (Amazing X-Men #4)