456 – Until/Unless

July 21, 2024 Miles 3 comments

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In which there’s nothing inherently wrong with monster-of-the-week; Marrow’s makeover extends to her font; Red Skull gets a Power Glove; Marvel sets up a slate of spinoffs; and you should hire Matt Hunter to produce your podcast!

X-PLAINED:

What Danger’s been up to lately
Uncanny X-Men #371
X-Men #91
X-Men Annual 1999
Crossover cover design
Skrullverine
Machine Man
Dethlok vs. Dethklok
Jack Truman (Agent 18) (to some extent)
A nice dress
An awkward reunion
Gambit as a mentor
Billy G.
A daring but silly rescue
Several upcoming series
Marrow’s bone bikini and/or pubes
Whether Rogue can absorb animals

NEXT EPISODE: Cecilia Reyes returns from retirement!

Want to hire J&MXPtXM producer Matt Hunter to produce your podcast? Email him!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 455 – Space, Geeks, and Galactus

July 19, 2024 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Where the streets have no [right angles in their fr]ame (X-Men #89)

“Hey, this gravestone’s taken! Get your own!” (X-Men #89)

Perhaps our very favorite Spider-Man. (X-Men #89)

Still more competent than the Great Lakes Avengers. (X-Men #89)

Kitty meets “Kitty”. (X-Men #89)

PICTURED: the computer lab Jay and Miles worked in back in college. (X-Men #89)

You’re all dead! And wear red! And from your employers you have fled! (X-Men #89)

Just a hell of a nice cover. (Uncanny X-Men #370)

I mean, Fake-Vision’s not wrong. (Uncanny X-Men #370)

“Over”-acting? I don’t understand what that phrase means. (Uncanny X-Men #370)

“As you know, Skrull-Bob…” (Uncanny X-Men #370)

That is an exceptionally Muppet-y Skrull. (Uncanny X-Men #370)

Superbeings to the left of me, space pirates to the right… (Uncanny X-Men #370)

Skrull-ternative medicine. (Uncanny X-Men #370)

Hey, those Skrulls are Muppet-y too! (X-Men #90)

In which Alan Davis draws everybody. (X-Men #90)

Okay, so Professor X’s plan doesn’t work, but… hell of a speech, Chuck. (X-Men #90)

“I said just a little off the top!” (X-Men #90)

Welp, here we go. (X-Men #90)

Who designed this thing?! (X-Men #90)

Well damn. (X-Men #90)

“You come around here often, reflection?” (X-Men #90)

NEXT TIME: Douglock’s back!

455 – Space, Geeks, and Galactus

July 7, 2024 Jay 8 comments

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In which Roadhouse is basically a Wolverine story; Spider-Man does crimes; space names are derivative; there are lots of good reasons to yell at Professor Xavier; the X-Men do Doctor Who; Galactus is not interested in your puny human feelings; Marrow gets a new look; the Skrulls need a crash course in UI; and we overthink bones.

X-PLAINED:

The time the Skrulls did “A Piece of the Action”
The trouble with benevolent dictatorships
X-Men #89-90
Uncanny X-Men #370
A New York City that is not in fact New York City
“Spider-Man”
A ruse
Faces
Skrull problems
Mar-Vell
Adam Warlock
Sass vs. joviality
Skrull Cop City
Disguises
Nova (Frankie Raye)
How Galactus eats planets
Condiments
Several melees
Bone pubes
Skrull UI
Whether Moopsy could drink Wolverine’s bones
X-Musicals

NEXT EPISODE: The return of Douglock!

The Roald Dahl short story whose title Jay couldn’t recall is “Beware of the Dog.”

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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454 – X-Men ’97, Part 2

June 30, 2024 Miles 13 comments

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SPOILER WARNING: ALL OF THEM, NONSTOP

In which Barry Windsor-Smith is too sexy for television; we know what happens when unstable molecules get struck by lightning; X-Men gets political and does it spectacularly; this Captain America would not sew the cape; Magneto continues to throw things into space; and they kissed and we missed it.

X-PLAINED:

Fabian Cortez’s name
X-Men ’97 episodes 6-10
Lifedeath I & II: a surprising adaptation
Varying levels of going in blind
A somewhat different and possibly better Forge
The Adversary vs. the Owl Queen
Stormiest and least-Stormy costumes
Professor Charles Xavier, Official Space Boyfriend
Colonialism vs. Identity
Delayed catharsis
The narrative power of altered opening credits
What makes allyship effective (and not)
Justified mutant anger
The worst version of Nina DaCosta
What makes Prime Sentinels scary
Summers family feels
The best damned fight scenes out there
Bastion, robo-avatar of conservative white patriarchy
Simultaneous crossovers
A psychic gay bar
A last boss arena
Acolyte equivalencies
Phoenix Ex Machina
Crying
Whether Magneto was right
Apoca-futures and Apoca-pasts
A bulletin board and our hopes for its contents
Soft Serve
Kitty Pryde’s coffee shop AU
X-Men ’97 as the perfect gateway

NEXT EPISODE: Skrulls!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

The Judgment of Magneto by Asher Elbein

No visual companion this week!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

453 – X-Men ’97, Part 1

June 23, 2024 Jay 21 comments

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SPOILER WARNING: ALL OF THEM, NONSTOP

In which we put the comics on hold to take a look at X-Men ’97; it is still always Inferno in here; Wolverine is best used sparingly; a Marvel show finally embraces politics; Wolverine is best in small doses; Madeylne Pryor still always deserves better; Jubilee grows up; and we are all in on this series.

X-PLAINED:

“Beyond Good and Evil”
X-Men: The Animated Series and our respective feelings about it
X-Men ’97, episodes 1-5
Watching X-Men ’97 with and without context
Making animated Cyclops work
The Magneto’s-hair-length morality index
Politics
Voices
Adaptation pacing
Agency
Abcissa
Foreshadowing
Time compression
Horniest Rogue
Death in cartoons
A metaphor
Nonbinary identity in 1997
Character evolution

NEXT EPISODE: Episodes 6-10

No visual companion this week!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

June 2, 2024 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the podcast here.

Spoiler: No. (Uncanny X-Men #368)

I need a black-and-white numbered legend for this panel. (Uncanny X-Men #368)

HAMMER PANTS (Uncanny X-Men #368)

And now, for something completely different. (Uncanny X-Men #368)

Specifically, this. (Uncanny X-Men #368)

Well, then. (X-Men #88)

“Good lord!” (X-Men #88)

The Trion. (X-Men #88)

Alan Davis’s Black Tom Cassidy is a looker. (X-Men #88)

Coooooool (X-Men #88)

Storm and Ororo. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

Tentacles from the tentacle dimension. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

THEY WENT IN THROUGH THE FACE (Uncanny X-Men #369)

The Trion, revisited. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

I fuckin’ love it when anyone carries Wolverine like this. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

Juggernaut vs. Jugger-not. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #369)

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex!

451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

June 2, 2024 Jay 2 comments

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In which we remain fascinated by Magneto’s robot butler; murder is Logan’s love language; the Juggernaut punches a hole in reality; Professor Xavier makes it weird; and Storm lectures several gods.

X-PLAINED:

Silly mutant powers
Uncanny X-Men #368-369
X-Men #88
Alan Davis’s X-Men run
Magneto’s robot butler
Joseph’s funeral
Nun-sense
A voyage to another dimension
Eyebrow power
Ejulp
The Trion
The other Gem of Cyttorak that’s like the first one but somehow worse
Several comas
Juggernaut vs. Juggernaut
Evil, kind of
Vacationing with X-Men characters
Illyana Rasputin and Rachel Summers

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 444 – Damnit, Magnus

March 31, 2024 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Domino: wine mom, but also good mom. (X-Force #86)

WRONG FREEZER WRONG FREEZER (X-Force #86)

Theresa Rourke Cassidy, mistress of disguise. (X-Force #86)

Remember how Moonstar’s weird new powers are always accompanied by a cosmic blue glow? This issue doesn’t, and is thus… confusing. (X-Force #86)

Odysseus Indigo, the most dapper of antagonists. (X-Force #86)

Some exceptionally efficient visual storytelling by Jim Cheung. (X-Force #86)

Christmas in March! Well, March for us. December for Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Hey, it’s that thing Miles used to draw in middle school! How’d that get there?! (Uncanny X-Men #365)

In which Colossus interrupts a very manly threesome. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

The X-Men X-Plain X-Mas. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

I mean, that’s Rusty Collins, right? (Uncanny X-Men #365)

“My favorite X-Men character? You probably haven’t heard of him.” (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Oof, my emotions… (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Aww. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Now that is a cover. (X-Men #85)

In which the first page establishes that this story will be a Big Deal. (X-Men #85)

Sorry, Bill… today’s gonna be a rough one. (X-Men #85)

We missed Alan Davis. (X-Men #85)

Uh oh. (X-Men #85)

Heroes. (X-Men #85)

This issue uses juxtaposition perfectly. (X-Men #85)

Magneto gets the answer he wants… and then the answer he doesn’t. (X-Men #85)

NEXT TIME: The Magneto War begins.

LINKS & FURTHER FESTIVITIES

RSVP to our 10th birthday party!

444 – Damnit, Magnus

March 31, 2024 Miles 5 comments

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In which it’s difficult to flee with soup; Miles may or may not be haunting the X-Men; Colossus collaborates involuntarily; Marrow is full of surprises; Magneto is a dick; Jay continues to carry a torch for Secret Wars: Siege; and you should totally come to our birthday party.

X-PLAINED:

Several rather pointed allusions
X-Force #86
Uncanny X-Men #365
X-Men #85
Almost Reno, NM
Where mutants come from
The Aguilar Institute (more) (again)
Abandoned towns
Mary the telepathic moppet (more) (again)
Odysseus Indigo
The Damocles Foundation
Sibling names
The Fundamental Attribution Error
A haunting
Christmas beer
Christmas ghost exquisite corpse
Bill Jones
A rescue mission
Essential stories of the ‘90s
Our weird favorites
Siege
Our upcoming 10^th birthday party (more) (again)

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto War begins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 442 – MimeQuest 64

March 3, 2024 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

A story in four parts. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

They have fun. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

In a world of clean-lined cartoony art, Logan is craggy. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

#roasted (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Any of the X-Men could wear that map as a dress! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

(New) Girl Talk (X-Men Unlimited #22)

A well-armed mime-litia. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Patrick Gleason, master of visually engaging conversations. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

And you told your math teacher you’d never need to know this stuff in real life. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Shadowcat and Marrow miniseries now, please! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

See, it’s funny, because normally MetroCards charge you! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Space Ghost: “Dames are like mustard: they taste great on a sandwich. But when you’re not eating a sandwich… they just sit there in the fridge… on a shelf… in a jar… labeled… mustard.” (X-Men Unlimited #22)