Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: jean grey

As Mentioned in Episode 301 – Can’t Beat the Real Thing

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
This is in fact an ENTIRELY REASONABLE position under the circumstances. (X-Men Prime #1)
Dennis is his own disparaging narrator. (X-Men Prime #1)
I don’t know why John Constantine is here to question Trish Tilby’s ethics, but SOMEONE needs to. (X-Men Prime #1)
Why is Val here? WHO KNOWS? (X-Men Prime #1)
Pretty sure this is supposed to be Onslaught, but it’s not going to be confirmed, so… (X-Men Prime #1)
“I repurposed all the brain parts that would normally go to fashion sense. On one hand, I can keep track of every team in play. On the other hand, this is how I dress myself.” (X-Men Prime #1)
Mondays, amirite? (X-Men Prime #1)
That’s… exactly what a chaperone is, though. (X-Men Prime #1)
GUYS SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE JUST IN A HURRY (X-Men Prime #1)
Just wait ’til Age of X-Man. (X-Men Prime #1)
Emplate: still exceptionally creepy. (X-Men Prime #1)
nopenopenopenopenope (X-Men Prime #1)
I’ve seen at least three horror movies that basically start this way. (X-Men Prime #1)
NEXT EPISODE: The fall of Avalon, and some related situation comedy.

LINKS & FURTHER HOMECOMINGS:

301 – Can’t Beat the Real Thing

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we enter our fourth century of podcasting with brand new theme music; we have both Wolverine questions and wolverine questions; it is extremely rough to be Bishop; the creator of Garfield may or may not live in a sewer on Earth-616; Rogue needs better coping mechanisms; bigotry is depressingly timeless; and everything is Onslaught now.

X-PLAINED:

  • Joseph’s Brotherhood of Evil Mutants
  • Our new theme music
  • X-Men Prime #1
  • A genuinely cool cover gimmick
  • What happened after the end of the world
  • Boundaries
  • War crimes vs. fashion crimes
  • Destruction of real landmarks in fiction
  • A mysterious assailant
  • Actual embodied chaos god Jim Davis and his Earth-616 namesake
  • Several memorable Garfield stories
  • Marrow (Sarah Rushman)
  • The secret origin of the Morlocks
  • A friendship we miss
  • Unhealthy coping mechanisms
  • The perennially dubious journalistic ethics of Trish Tilby
  • Dennis
  • The death of Dennis
  • Flaws of the mutant metaphor (more) (again)
  • Several refugees from Earth-295
  • Mr. Summers and Mr. Summers
  • The secret origin of the Genoshan mutates
  • The Acolytes
  • The continuing relevance of the mutant metaphor (more) (again)
  • Cross-universe characterization

NEXT EPISODE: The fall of Avalon!

NOTE: The Garfield strips Jay mentions appeared in newspapers, on purpose, in October 1989.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 300 – Götterdämmerung

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Trust us–it looks better on foil. (X-Men: Omega)
Those skulls can’t be stable. (X-Men: Omega)
The gang’s mostly here! (X-Men: Omega)
[Cries in Dark Phoenix Saga] (X-Men: Omega)
Truly, he has been preparing for this moment for his entire life.
It’s cute how Nate assumes that it’s possible to talk Magneto out of fighting anybody, ever. (X-Men: Omega)
I’d like to imagine that the M’Kraan crystal made the conscious choice not to show her Onslaught. (X-Men: Omega)
YES! (X-Men: Omega)
Just, um, imagine that he’s holding a gun and also using his powers out of… enthusiasm? For the gun? I guess? (X-Men: Omega)
“Wait, are you the angry Claremontean narrator?!” (X-Men: Omega)
It’s okay. He’ll be back in about 14 years. (X-Men: Omega)
Nobody expects an ongoing series! (X-Men: Omega)
And that, as they say, is that. (X-Men: Omega)
NEXT EPISODE: Back in the 616!

LINKS & FURTHER EPICS:

300 – Götterdämmerung

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the Age of Apocalypse comes to an end; Angel briefly lives up to his potential; Bishop was sometimes right; It’s not a climactic ending without an X-Men #137 reference; Colossus breaks our hearts; X-Men: Marvels Snapshot will be out in September; and somehow we have made 300 of these things.

X-PLAINED:

  • Beast vs. Dark Beast
  • X-Men: Omega
  • The entirety of the (first) Age of Apocalypse
  • Potpourri vs. incense
  • Dramatic hair
  • Many, many errors
  • Unforeseen consequences
  • A long-anticipated team-up
  • Many deaths
  • Art as artifact
  • Narration that has haunted Jay for 20 years
  • One of the more persistent deaths of David Haller
  • Blast Attack
  • The end of a world
  • Refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Our favorite X-milestone issues
  • Theoretical teams
  • Orphans
  • When X-Men: Marvels Snapshot is actually coming out
  • Our favorite show bits
  • How Jay’s chickens-in-law are doing

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Prime

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

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For full effect, there really needs to be an inset panel of Storm mugging at the reader. (What If? vol. 2 #77)
Forge is a JERK. (What If? vol. 2 #77)
What the hell kind of weird drills does this universe have? (What If? vol. 2 #77)
It’s weird that there’s a universe where both of these kids exist. (What If? vol. 2 #77)
I wonder if the Phoenix designs new costumes every time; and, if so, what its aesthetic phases have been. (What If? vol. 2 #77)
Is this page foreshadowing a Days of Future Past-style dystopia? Discuss. (What If? vol. 2 #77)
No, seriously, he JUST KEEPS SAYING IT. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
That hair. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
Brother Voodoo X-Plains the premise. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
Uncalled for, Ben. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
Damnit, Nate. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
Just had to work it in again, huh? (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
The costume just isn’t the same without metal wings. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
DAMNIT, NATE. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)
Why does Magneto look kind of like Keanu Reeves here? (What If? vol. 2 #81)
The more I look at the art from this issue, the angrier I get about it. (What If? vol. 2 #81)
[cries in comics editor] (What If? vol. 2 #81)
Galactus is a poet, and he didn’t even know it! (He knew it.) (What If? vol. 2 #81)
Relatable sentiment. (What If? vol. 2 #81)
Hello, mid-1990s CG. You… sure do exist. (What If? vol. 2 #81)
NEXT EPISODE: The end of a world. (Also, #300? So, that’s a thing.)

LINKS & FURTHER HYPOTHETICALS

299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

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In which some universes are more pleasant than others; Havok is basically a Care Bear; Wolverine is a P.R. nightmare; Nate Grey tries; stealth is not among the Silver Surfer’s strengths; Night Thrasher ascends to godhood; Jay and Miles dive down the What If rabbit hole.

X-PLAINED:

  • Earth-200500 (again)
  • Earth-42409
  • What If? vol. 2 #77
  • What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse
  • What If? vol. 2 #81
  • Earth-77995
  • Fashion editorials
  • One of the worse versions of Forge
  • Superheroes x fashion
  • Care Bears vs. X-Men
  • The Hellfire Club of Earth-77995
  • A surprisingly normal Grey-Summers family
  • Several uses for the Phoenix Force
  • Worst-case scenarios
  • Earth-93074
  • Savage Land home ec
  • Bad choices
  • The Defenders of Earth-93074
  • How to manipulate Nate Grey
  • Narrative benefits of omnipotence
  • A time loop
  • Earth-9601
  • A meeting on the moon
  • What the Watcher watches
  • Galactus
  • The Silver Surfer
  • Grandpa Magneto
  • Some remarkable technology
  • A heavy-handed metaphor
  • Our takes on What If scenarios
  • The Corbeau-Grey scale of decision making
  • Storm’s eyes
  • Our character voices

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Omega

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This June, we’ll be donating all of the profits to Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 297 – Blood Is Compulsory

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
We were not nearly that ripped when we were 17. Or that telekinetic, I guess. (X-Man #1)
As entertaining as it is to imagine him with Schwarzenegger’s accent, I guess Cyclops is more John Connor than he is the T-800. (X-Man #1)
What I wouldn’t give for these guys to have their own ongoing comic… (X-Man #1)
I mean, seriously! How great would it be? Half revolutionary, half thespian, all delightful! (X-Man #1)
Black Tom Cassidy’s hair went white the day he lost his shillelagh. (X-Man #1)
Characters who need their own book, figure 3. (X-Man #1)
IS YOUR NAME OMEGA BLUE, ARKADY? NO IT IS NOT! (X-Man #2)
This is the Earth-295 equivalent of playing catch. (X-Man #2)
Sunspot would be proud. (And god damn, Steve Skroce is good at drawing telekinesis.) (X-Man #2)
Come on, Forge… How could you not trust a guy with a smile that big and a forehead diamond that he assures you is merely a fashion statement? (X-Man #2)
Nightmare factory? Heavy metal album cover? Why not both? (X-Man #2)
Butter Rum of Earth-295 does not approve. (X-Man #2)
The best-dressed D&D party of the Age of Apocalypse. (X-Man #3)
Whoa, Jason – maybe dial it back a little? (X-Man #3)
Schlonk? (X-Man #3)
Steve Skroce, making psychic powers look amazing since 1993. (Anyone remember Ectokid?) (X-Man #3)
I’m so glad they get to have this before everything goes to hell. (X-Man #3)
I’m not psychically crying you’re psychically crying (X-Man #3)
Jeph Loeb gets Sinister. (X-Man #4)
Does Mister Sinister practice his smug smiles in the mirror for moments like these? I mean, obviously he does, but like, for how long? (X-Man #4)
pterodactylwithapulserifle.tumblr.com (X-Man #4)
“To die will be an awfully big adventure.” (X-Man #4)
“Their eyes locked through the hole they’d smashed through the wall, and though they’d never truly met, they knew what they were: family.” (X-Man #4)
OBSCENE MONUMENT. (X-Man #4)
Hey, it’s Nate’s early, even more Dune-like design! (X-Men Collector’s Preview #1)
NEXT TIME: Being Human.

297 – Blood Is Compulsory

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Nate Grey is a drama kid; Forge-295 is the hero we need; Mister Sinister is a graduate of the Danielle “Moonstar” Moonstar school of secret identities; and we really, really, really wish that the theater troupe had gotten the ongoing series.

X-PLAINED:

  • Just how powerful Nate Grey is
  • X-Man’s somewhat baffling ongoing appeal
  • X-Man #1-4
  • A theater company
  • The Best Forge (Earth-295)
  • Toad (Earth-295)
  • Sauron (Earth-295)
  • Brute (Earth-295)
  • An extended Tom Stoppard allusion
  • “Essex”
  • Domino (Earth-295)
  • Theater in and as resistance
  • An ineffectual ruse
  • A lot of death
  • Caliban (Earth-295)
  • A family reunion
  • The story we really wanted out of this series
  • The X-Man ongoing series
  • Chronically missing New Mutants
  • X-arcs we’d like to see animated

NEXT EPISODE: X-Universe!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This June, we’ll be donating all of the profits to Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 291 – Eat Malarkey and Die

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Logan just straight-up has a mane in this timeline. (Weapon X #1)
Seriously, this has to be the worst mode of transportation. (Weapon X #1)
“I’ll finish you, just like I finished my disserta– ohhhh, shit.” (Weapon X #1)
NEVER NOT FUNNY. (Weapon X #1)
Is… is Logan saying that he hopes Havok gets teleported into somebody’s butt? (Weapon X #1)
Snnnnrk. (Weapon X #1)
He spends hours thinking ’em up. (Weapon X #1)
Seriously, if it weren’t for that damn pose, this page would be SO cool. (Weapon X #1)
Logan subscribes to the Dan McNinja school of tactics. (Weapon X #2)
To his credit, I’d be pretty nonplussed if this fell through my ceiling. (Weapon X #2)
The setup… (Weapon X #2)
…and the punchline. (Weapon X #2)
I see what you did, there. (Weapon X #3)
She doesn’t seem to have a sash, so I’m just going to go ahead and assume that Carol-295 just carries rhythmic gymnastic ribbons to make her leaps look more dramatic. (Weapon X #3)
This version of Gateway is really cool, and deserves both more page space and more analysis than he gets. (Weapon X #3)
CAROL FOREVER. (Weapon X #3)
Was Logan just, like, saving this for a rainy day? (Weapon X #4)
That is certainly one way to navigate an airship. (Weapon X #4)
You know nothing pleasant is going to follow this sound effect. (Weapon X #4)
‘Kay. (Weapon X #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Vulcan is still the worst Summers Brother in any universe, though.

LINKS & FURTHER ATROCITIES

291 – Eat Malarkey and Die

22 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we celebrate a birthday; nuclear war is never a good Plan A; every Logan is Old Man Logan; we are underwhelmed by the Pretty Boys of Earth-295; Jean Grey is one hell of a pilot; there are so many reasons not to like Donald Pierce; teleporters are the narrative nuclei of the Age of Apocalypse; and Gateway of Earth-295 deserves significantly more in-depth exploration than we can provide.

X-PLAINED:

  • Weapon X (Logan)
  • Weapon X #1-4
  • Irony
  • Coordinating costumes to tattoos (and vice versa)
  • How to ride a sentinel
  • Apocalypse’s sea wall
  • Mutant power classifications
  • The mass human evacuation
  • Nuclear war
  • Magma
  • A load of malarkey
  • Interactions of telepathy and PTSD
  • The Pretty Boys of Earth-295
  • How not to jump out of a zeppelin
  • What Carol Danvers smells like
  • Gateway (Earth-295)
  • An exceptionally high-tech guilt trip
  • Unconventional navigation
  • Character transformations between universes
  • The complex conundrum of Jean Grey
  • When humans became aware about mutants
  • Logan’s D&D alignment
  • Our own D&D character histories

NEXT EPISODE: Factor X!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!