Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 133 – Feisty Little Fellow from the Stars

Listen to the episode here.


133 – Feisty Little Fellow from the Stars (Judgment War, Part 2)

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In which the plot thickens; Jay and Miles fix Avatar; Ship is a good bro; you are in space right now; the Beginagains go full This Island Earth; Cyclops weaponizes love; voting is really important; and you’re listening to ten straight hours of soft jazz and subversion on ZZ-105

X-PLAINED:

  • The other Dazzler (Bertram Worthington)
  • Our newest t-shirt
  • X-Factor #48-50
  • A metaphor within a metaphor, in space
  • The first half of Judgment War (briefly) (again)
  • A prisoner exchange
  • Hairstyles of the possessed and famous
  • Proper use of Cable
  • A case for retcons
  • Iceman vs. Archangel
  • A feisty little fellow from the stars
  • The secret origin of Ship
  • The Celestials
  • The core of Iceman’s personality
  • Several kisses
  • Beast and the Rejects
  • Some terrible hats
  • An unfair fight
  • A nefarious plot
  • Contagious heroism
  • Arishem
  • The power of love
  • Why we use the word “queer”
  • Several theoretical and unlikely crossovers

NEXT EPISODE: Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival, with musical guest Scott Koblish!


You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 128 – A Stupid Way to Die (Judgment War, Part 1)

Listen to the podcast here.


128 – A Stupid Way to Die (Judgment War, Part 1)

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which X-Factor goes to space; Miles gets judgmental about spelling; Paul Smith returns to an X-title; Celestials are a pain; Judgment War is the Star-Trekkiest story that doesn’t actually involve Star Trek; monster ladies are super important; if you can be a green dude, you should be a green dude; and Cyclops gears up to fight some gods.

X-PLAINED:

  • One way to kill a Celestial
  • Judg(e)ment War
  • Drunk Mark Trail
  • X-Factor #43-46
  • Walls you should maybe not bust through even if you’re X-Factor
  • A completely inappropriate show pitch
  • Celestials
  • The true secret purpose of Ship
  • The Chosen
  • The Rejects
  • Dualers
  • Perfect Seera
  • Rask
  • Zarka
  • Monster ladies in cultural context
  • Lev
  • A stupid way to die
  • Jammers
  • Plot-relevant amnesia
  • The Most Perfect
  • ZZ-105
  • Baby theft (more)(again)
  • Ryest
  • The Beginagains
  • Whether and when there’ll be another all-question episode
  • The current status of the Jean Grey school

NEXT EPISODE: The Cross-Time Caper begins!


You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

Jay Recaps X-Men: Evolution
S1E10: Shadowed Past

Ever heard of something called “The Draco”?

No, not the blonde guy from Harry Potter. The “Draco” I’m talking about is an Uncanny X-Men arc where Chuck Austen retconned Nightcrawler’s origin story to involve a father from an ancient race of demon-looking mutants long exiled to a hell dimension by a bunch of quasi-angelic counterparts.1

The Draco is one of the worst arcs of Austen’s already fairly shaky 2 run; and generally considered to be one of the worst X-Men stories ever. It’s the continuity equivalent of awkward makeouts at your company Christmas party: everyone does their best to politely pretend that it never happened, and if anyone brings it up, everyone familiar with the story gets acutely embarrassed by proxy.

I am telling you about The Draco not because it has any relevance whatsoever to X-Men: Evolution–it doesn’t–but so that you will understand where the bar sits when I tell you that “Shadowed Past” is my least favorite take on Nightcrawler’s origin story.

Continue reading

122 – Boom Boom Von Doom and the Ontology of Monsters

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which the back-up stories of Atlantis Attacks are way better than the main event; the Serpent Society is hilarious; Longshot finds a rock; the S.U.R.F.E.R.S. are no Neutrinos; our volume of digressions is inversely proportional to our investment in this crossover; Jay overthinks sunglasses; and somehow we still aren’t entirely done with Inferno.

X-PLAINED:

  • Leonard McKenzie
  • Princess Fen
  • Tiger Shark
  • A dubious crossover event and three splendid backup stories
  • The best thing in Marvel Puzzle Quest
  • Skateman
  • Atlantis Attacks
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual #13
  • New Mutants Annual #5
  • X-Factor Annual #4
  • Ghaur
  • Llyra
  • Homo mermanus
  • The Serpent Society
  • Boomslang
  • Why snakes don’t wear vests
  • The Maple Hill Farm books
  • The Horn of Doom (again)
  • Namorita
  • Impractical swimwear
  • Surf, or S.U.R.F.E.R.S., or whoever the hell they are
  • Zak and the Neutrinos
  • The trouble with mobile landmarks
  • A case of mistaken identity
  • The true meaning of something, probably
  • Ralph Macchio, but not that Ralph Macchio
  • Circumstances in which it is acceptable to throw a small child down an elevator shaft
  • The definitive Boom Boom
  • Eligible gentlemen of the Marvel Universe
  • Boom Boom Von Doom
  • A false dichotomy
  • Sally Pashkow
  • A really great outfit
  • Presidencies rated by X-Books
  • Best and worst moral inversions

NEXT WEEK: Mojo Mayhem!


ART CHALLENGE: Send your best Boom Boom romance stories, covers, and pin-ups to xplainthexmen(at)gmail.com by SEPTEMBER 15, with the subject line BOOM BOOM RULES.


NOTE: In this episode, Jay briefly confused two Marvel villain teams: the Serpent Society (snake-themed villains); and the Sons of the Serpent, also known as the Serpent Men (hate group). We would like to offer our apologies to the Serpent Society, who are ridiculous but not, as far as we know, racist.


You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 120 – Observed by a Family of Lizard People

Listen to the episode here.



LINKS & FURTHER READING:

120 – Observed by a Family of Lizard People

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which everything is worse with Nazis; Excalibur gets its groove back; Meggan has an identity crisis; Kitty gets a crush; a dragon gets interdimensional sanctuary; and the Cross-Time Caper starts not with a bang, but a foomp.

X-PLAINED:

  • The death of Lilandra Neramani
  • Excalibur #8-11
  • The best name in Hollywood
  • Still more of Inferno’s aftermath
  • A basketball game
  • Blackbird disambiguation
  • Several long-delayed reunions and one subsequent resolution
  • Alastaire Stuart (and his banana)
  • Tourists who are also lizards
  • Lightning Force
  • A number of unfortunate encounters
  • The difference between Errol Flynn characters and Errol Flynn
  • The fall of Nigel Frobisher
  • The switch that turns the engine invisible
  • What may be the world’s least subtle euphemistic use of the term “roommate”
  • How the discourse around comics has changed since the ’80s
  • Jubilee vs. power creep

NEXT EPISODE: Deadpool v Gambit, with Ben Acker!


You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 118 – Extrude the Grappling Arms!

Listen to the episode here!



LINKS:

 

118 – Extrude the Grappling Arms!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which you really can’t compete with Cable; the X-Men may or may not ditch a funeral; Nanny extrudes the grappling arms; Boom Boom is more responsible than she looks; Jean Grey is the cool stepmom; we posit an alternate explanation for Brexit; and ravens are the best dinosaurs.

X-PLAINED:

  • What happened to the Inferno babies
  • X-Factor #40-42
  • Madelyne Pryor’s funeral
  • Post-Inferno X-Factor
  • Archangel’s inconsistent appearance
  • Secret origins of Nanny and the Orphanmaker
  • Teenagers (more) (again)
  • Tom Jones (Alchemy)
  • Conversations we probably shouldn’t have with Neal Conan
  • Trolls of London
  • Dubious super-parenting
  • Phy
  • Phay
  • Phee
  • Phough
  • Phumm
  • Troll economics
  • A grocery list
  • The Ravenmaster
  • Miles’s mom

NEXT EPISODE: Miles and Elisabeth X-Plain New Mutants Forever!


You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!