Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: gambit

As Mentioned in Episode 415 – Stardust

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This is a cruel hoax. Mister Sinister appears nowhere in this miniseries. (Gambit vol. 2 #1)
Meet Olivier Stoker and his somewhat peculiar aesthetic. (Gambit vol. 2 #1)
Those playing-card captions. (Gambit vol. 2 #1)
WHAT THE HELL IS IN THE BOX, THOUGH?!?!!? (Gambit vol. 2 #1)
She must be an angel: surely no mere mortal’s hair would censor their swimsuit areas with such precision. (Gambit vol. 2 #1)
WHY IS THERE A TENTACLE (Gambit vol. 2 #2)
Spooning with Sister Katrina. (Gambit vol. 2 #2)
Meet Sybil! (Gambit vol. 2 #2)
“LITERALEEEEEEEEEEEEE” (Gambit vol. 2 #2)
Stoker and his little friends. (Gambit vol. 2 #2)
Surfin’ Pew S A. (Gambit vol. 2 #3)
Maybe next time try speed dating. (Gambit vol. 2 #3)
She’s fun at parties. (Gambit vol. 2 #3)
Anielle unleashed. (Gambit vol. 2 #4)
Aw, Katrina, no. (Gambit vol. 2 #4)
And they all lived happily ever after? (Gambit vol. 2 #4)
NEXT EPISODE: This fuckin’ thing.

 

415 – Stardust

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In which Gambit does Stardust; Wilbur Weston holds no one’s redemption; Gambit is unequivocally bisexual; Lucifer is kinda goofy; and we still don’t know what’s in the box.

X-PLAINED:

  • Family businesses
  • Gambit vol. 2 #1-4
  • What Gambit’s been up to
  • Some peculiar parallels
  • Father Miguel Bonavita
  • Sister Katrina
  • Father Marcelo
  • A box
  • Tante Mattie Baptiste
  • Olivier Stoker and/or Lucifer
  • Fancy captions
  • The Cross of Redemption
  • Anielle, who may or may not Hanael and may or may not also be a fallen star and/or angel
  • Gambit’s subconscious
  • Octopus Gambit
  • The Grigori
  • Sibyl
  • Cerberus
  • Wormwood
  • Pew surfing
  • CyberFork
  • Spitting locusts, sadly
  • A bad take on the trolley problem
  • An ambiguous ending
  • A pecular transition
  • Genre displacement
  • Warlock as a form of art
  • Elon Musk’s closest X-villain analog

NEXT EPISODE: Dark night of the Bamf!

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As Mentioned in Episode 411 – Tearaway Pants

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When you meet a straight couple, you should ask them which is the Nic Cage and which is the John Travolta. (X-Men Unlimited #17)
Fuckssake, Warren. (X-Men Unlimited #17)
Severe costume injuries. (X-Men Unlimited #17)
Logan’s skiing / beat poetry outfit. (X-Men Unlimited #17)
After thirty years, Warren finally gets a gun, I guess. (X-Men Unlimited #17)
SERIOUSLY, HOW DO THEY RECOGNIZE IT?! (X-Men Unlimited #17)
Much like Gambit, I hallucinate a team of X-Men insulting me at all times. (X-Men Unlimited #18)
Hydro-Man. He sure is. (X-Men Unlimited #18)
Jean Grey advocates for change. (X-Men Unlimited #18)
Aw. (X-Men Unlimited #18)
See, they body-swapped because of carpet static and… y’know what? Just watch Gravity Falls. You won’t regret it.
NEXT EPISODE: Back to the core!

411 – Tearaway Pants

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In which we actually kind of like a Sabretooth story; we’re not asking for viscera, here; all pants on Earth-616 are tearaway pants; we’d like to see more Wolverine stories about bodily autonomy; Gambit’s hallucinations have hallucinations; and there are probably too many X-books.

X-PLAINED:

  • Punch-clock villains
  • Hydro-Man’s secret weakness
  • 411
  • ‘90s fashion
  • X-Men Unlimited #17-18
  • X-Men Unlimited vs. annuals
  • A difficult casting decision
  • Forge’s neutralizer gun
  • Costume injuries
  • Color symbolism? Kinda? I guess?
  • Mrs. Hoo
  • Saberine & Wolvertooth
  • Warren Kenneth Worthington III vs. shirts
  • How to dress for Earth-616
  • Hot buttered whatever
  • Boob foliage
  • Clones
  • Very tenacious blood stains
  • The return of the Angry Claremontean Narrator
  • Lots of hallucinations
  • Oscar the Fixer
  • Hydro-Man
  • Redemption, symbolic and otherwise
  • The evolution of Magneto’s name
  • Our ideal X-line

NEXT EPISODE: Back to the core!

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As Mentioned in Episode 400 – Loud Noises

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Marauders to the left of me, X-Men to the right, and I’m stuck in the middle with you… (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Listen, Gambit, it was either this or a Tupperware(TM) for that chunk of your brain. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Their relationship seems healthy. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Eh, it’s still in better shape than the car Miles drove in high school. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Where? Oh, there. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
“He’s here again, Professor.” (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Speaking of different eras of the X-Men – check out Julian Totino Tedesco’s decade variant covers! Here’s the 60s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 70s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 80s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 90s… (All-New X-Men #18)
…and the 2000s. (All-New X-Men #18)
After this, it’s off to the Justice Exhibit through the Justice Hall and then to the Justice Shop. If anyone needs the Little Justice’s Room, it’s on the left. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Thunderbird, sure… but a version of Blink from an alternate universe? (Uncanny X-Men #350)
NOOOOORM! (Uncanny X-Men #350)
I’ve never been picked during jury selection, but I’m pretty sure this is how trials work, right? (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Rogue x-plains Gambit’s dark secret. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
As little sense as Rogue’s decision makes, damn if Joe Madureira (or Andy Smith?) doesn’t make it work anyway. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Erik the Red was really Erik the Red and Purple! (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Okay, okay – they’re no Cyclops, Wolverine, Storm, Colossus, Nightcrawler, and Thunderbird, but I like them anyway. (X-Men #70)
Dig that speech bubble transition. (X-Men #70)
Cecilia Reyes and Marrow, best of friends. (X-Men #70)
Why don’t more artists work in the telekinetic Phoenix flare? (X-Men #70)
Cecilia takes charge. (X-Men #70)
And you know Sam will 100% pay them back later. (X-Men #70)
I love these three. (X-Men #70)
The cavalry arrives. (X-Men #70)
For once, too much dialogue is a good thing. (X-Men #70)
Gross mutant powers are the best mutant powers. (X-Men #70)
Maggott 2.0, courtesy Joe Kelly. (X-Men #70)
The X-Men: often at their best when their lives are at their worst. (X-Men #70)
NEXT TIME: Generation X vs. Christmas.

NOTES & FURTHER READING:

400 – Loud Noises

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which legacy numbering is best left alone; all roads lead to the Antarctic; we finally learn Gambit’s big secret; Erik the Red gets yet a third identity; no one soils the Juggernaut; Maggott saves the day; and we have somehow made (technically more than) 400 of these things.

X-PLAINED

  • Spat
  • The tragic loss of the Cyber Comics
  • How not to back up your work
  • Uncanny X-Men #350
  • X-Men #70
  • A shambles
  • What’s been happening since Operation Zero Tolerance
  • A very fancy cover
  • Insufficient outerwear
  • Senses
  • Justice as a decorating theme
  • Baffling statuary
  • The return of Erik the Red
  • Erik the Red (again)
  • Ferris
  • Gambit’s big secret
  • A large number of continuity errors
  • A total dick move
  • De-icing
  • Untitled Marrow Game
  • A big fight
  • Living room surgery
  • Legal documents
  • Favorite anniversary issues
  • Dangling plot threads

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Christmas

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 398 – Shanna the Wee Devil

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
We would never, Maggott. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Grovel, allergic to sticks. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Spat: just your average reverse-aging cavegirl bounty hunter. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Weirder or less weird than the time the Morlocks healed Professor X and then dressed him in bondage gear? (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Big Mother Truckers no more. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Alas, poor Landscape! I barely knew him, Joseph: a fellow of infinite power, of most excellent colors. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Nanny’s great and all, but LOOK AT THAT BAT! (Uncanny X-Men #347)
I wish we got to see more of that robo-dragon in the back. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
Thankfully, Bishop is no stranger to being impaled by pipes. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
SabreRogue. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
This is pretty unambiguous, right? (Uncanny X-Men #348)
Chris Bachalo’s back! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Beast, Beast, Beast of the Jungle, strong as he can be! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Whoa, that volcano base got a lot more complicated when we switched artists. (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Even Maggott’s hair gets more impressive when he goes into battle-mode! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Bachalo draws chaos well. (Uncanny X-Men #349)
“Excess”? What do you mean by that word? (Uncanny X-Men #349)
All together now: “DAMMIT REMY!” (Uncanny X-Men #349)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force hits the road!

398 – Shanna the Wee Devil

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
In which the rest of the X-Men return from space; Maggott is the new cool; Gambit’s past catches up with him; Chris Bachalo takes over as regular artist on Uncanny X-Men; Deathbird flirts singularly aggressively; Eany and Meany eat a truck; dating a telepathic ninja is going to take some getting used to; and Havok predictably remains ABD.
X-PLAINED
  • Motormouth (Harley Davis)
  • Motormouth and Killpower
  • Uncanny X-Men #347-349
  • Grovel and Spat
  • A horse guy who is actually a cat-frog-lizard guy
  • An extraordinarily half-assed action figure
  • Load-bearing backstory
  • Landscape
  • The other Nanny
  • Elegant foreshadowing
  • Beast’s appearance as a mutant power
  • Gambit’s chest hair
  • The end of playtime
  • CCA-compliant foliage
  • Deathbird and Bishop
  • A vanity plate
  • Eany and Meany
  • One-off psychometry
  • Psylocke vs. Maggott
  • Decompression
  • Havok’s enduring lack of a Ph.D.
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force hits the road!
NOTE: In this episode, Miles theorized Grovel’s voice as sounding halfway between Cable and Kermit the Frog without realizing that he was in fact just describing Sweetums. -Jay

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As Mentioned in Episode 386 – No Puppy for Storm

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
In which Sam Guthrie has an Experience. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1997)
D’Gard is a snappy dresser. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1997)
Brotherhood! (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1997)
This is the most menacing Maggott will ever be, ever. (Uncanny X-Men #345)
Who is this metal dude? It remains a mystery to this day. (Uncanny X-Men #345)
Remember when Maggott was Australian? (Uncanny X-Men #345)
Gambit, penitent. (Uncanny X-Men #345)
Thirst-trap Bishop. (Uncanny X-Men #345)
Thirst-trap Deathbird. (Uncanny X-Men #345)
NEXT EPISODE: Party on Mount Wundagore!

386 – No Puppies for Storm

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which treading water isn’t always a bad thing; Storm remains an irresponsible leader; nobody should ever trust Dark Beast; we are befuddled by a large metal man; Maggott makes his debut; and we ship the heck out of Deathbird and Bishop.

X-PLAINED:

  • The time Captain America dated a supervillain
  • Treading water
  • Gene Nation (again)
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual 1997
  • Uncanny X-Men #345
  • Razors
  • Humanity’s Last Stand
  • Surprise
  • Boost and Tether
  • D’gard
  • A Star Trek allusion
  • The Morlock retcon
  • Maggott (Japheth)
  • A large metal individual
  • Foreshadowing
  • A large, inconvenient spaceship
  • Magneto’s relationship to Judaism
  • Recovery from the Legacy Virus

NEXT EPISODE: Field Trip to Mount Wundagore!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!