In which X-Force is the new New Mutants; Professor is what Cable has instead of a burn book; Cable develops emotional literacy; Jay has a lot of feelings about Shatterstar; Cowboys can be wizards, too; you really shouldn’t call adult people “child”; privilege is truly the greatest superpower; Cameron Hodge remains improbably difficult to kill; Candy Southern gets to write the ending to her own story; and Emerald City Comic Con is coming up REALLY fast!
X-PLAINED:
Reignfire
Jay & Miles at Emerald City Comic Con
Some new merch
X-Force #26
Uncanny X-Men #305-306
The evolution of Tabitha Smith’s code name
X-Force and its members (more) (again)
Professor’s narrative function
A sudden mustache and its potential implications
A lot of things about Shatterstar
Cable as a leader
Armor full of skin
Louis St. Croix and/or Mark Twain
An inappropriate nickname
The first Xavier school prom
Inflatable erotic accessory semantics
The return of Candy Southern
The return of Cameron Hodge
Moral event horizons and how to handle them in comics
Pros and cons of dating telepaths
NEXT EPISODE: A Maximoffstravaganza, feat. Max Carleton
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In which Jay recruits X-writers Seanan McGuire and Leah Williams, cosplayer Tea Fougner, and innocent bystanders Kel McDonald and Diana Fox, for a night of Emma Frost appreciation.
X-PLAINED:
Why Emma Frost is amazing; why we love her; and why you should, too.
NEXT EPISODE: Return of the RCX!
WHITE QUEEN COCKTAIL RECIPE:
Combine:
1.5 oz gin
.5 oz rose elderflower syrup
Splash of elixir vegetal
Prosecco to fill glass
Top off with:
Smoke bitters
No visual companion this week! Go read some comics about Emma Frost!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
Look at this gorgeous monstrosity. (Stryfe’s Strike File)
This dude would not appear in the main Marvel Universe until about a decade after he was introduced here. (Stryfe’s Strike File)
FORESHADOWING! (Stryfe’s Strike File)
Mystique’s worst kid, by a fairly wide margin. (Stryfe’s Strike File)
Remember her; she’ll be a big deal later. (Stryfe’s Strike File)
Stryfe: The Worst Kid in Your Fandom. (Stryfe’s Strike File)
SPOILER: This cover is profoundly misleading. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
WARREN KENNETH WORTHINGTON III, YOU DID WHAT?! (Uncanny X-Men #297)
A rare moment of candor from Professor X. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
The only part of this issue that I REALLY have trouble believing is that Jubilee was carying around a second pair of ‘blades just for funsies. Those things are cumbersome as heck. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
DAMNIT, JUBILEE. THIS IS WHY NOBODY TRUSTS YOU. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
Aw. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
And Aw, again. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
Yet a third Aw. (Uncanny X-Men #297)
She’s beauty, she’s grace, she’ll explode your face. (X-Force #19)
Bobby has had a pretty rough year. (X-Force #19)
Slow clap. (X-Force #19)
Vanessa is not having a great time post-X-Force. (X-Force #19)
PHOENIX II DECOLLETAGE! (X-Force #19)
Those are actually… really snazzy team uniforms. Dang. (X-Force #19)
And that was the end of THAT particular metaphor. (X-Force #19)
If you want to get involved in the transcripts–or just hang out with rad folks–come join us on Discord! (Transcription organization happens in the Greymalkin channel.)
In which “wolves” proves a remarkably broad category in the 616; we at least nominally wrap up X-Cutioner’s Song; Stryfe could really use a style guide; we issue our first-ever music challenge; Jubilee is an agent of chaos; Gambit’s powers are a metaphor; Charles Xavier has a complicated relationship to disability; the quality of Jay’s penmanship is a matter of official record; Boom Boom is a remarkably good costume designer; Cannonball comes into his own as a leader; and every “WHAT?!” you hear on this show is fresh and original.
X-PLAINED:
Wolves, to a very limited extent
Jay & Miles (kinda) at NYCC
Transcripts
X-Cutioner’s Song
Stryfe’s Strike File
Uncanny X-Men #297
X-Force #19
A gentle bird caught in a swirling tornado of lust and desperation
Shades of me
Shades of you
Shades of them
Our first-ever music challenge
Some foreshadowing
Nostalgia
A very nice hug
The one good side effect of Stryfe’s technoorganic virus
Charles Xavier vs. disability politics
Several practical jokes in very poor taste
Teacher-student bonding
An excellent epithet
Some lettering choices
An extended Hail Caesar riff
The Clooney Scale
An enduring mystery
Clone powers
Exclamatory logistics
NEXT EPISODE: Hey, remember Excalibur?
MUSIC CHALLENGE: Write and record a song based on or using text from Stryfe’s Strike File (or any of his rants from X-Cutioner’s Song)! Send your masterpieces (or links to ’em) to xplainthexmen(at)gmail(dot)com, with the subject STRYFE SONG!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
Okay, but seriously, he could have gotten that cape anywhere. (X-Force #11)
Early Deadpool was just kind of a jerk. (X-Force #11)
In which Garrison Kane and all of his teeth are watching you poop. (X-Force #11)
The best thing about this is that Rictor’s shirt changes color from green to read between issues, and I have decided that it is DEFINITELY Hypercolor(TM). (X-Force #11)
Hi, Crule. (X-Force #12)
Somewhere, Flash Gordon is very confused and very naked. (X-Force #12)
Just posting this for Rictor’s outfit, which really only gets more remarkable with every drawing. (X-Force #12)
If I were a better person, I might have pasted this together with the other half of the four-page spread… (X-Force #13)
…but, alas, I’m not. (X-Force #13)
Thaaaaaat’s our Cable! (X-Force #13)
Yeahno. (X-Force #13)
I really like the way Shoemaker draws battle-damaged Cable. (X-Force #14)
MY FEELINGS (X-Force #14)
Awk-ward. (X-Force #14)
Spoiler: FRIENDSHIP WINS. (X-Force #15)
And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn’t been for you meddling kids! (X-Force #15)
In which Jay returns from Latveria; Sabretooth is significantly less menacing in French; Fabian Nicieza takes the reins; X-Force wins our hearts and minds; Gideon plunders Flash Gordon’s wardrobe; Crule does not actually rule; Rictor was right; Ship is the friend who helps you move, but better; the X-Force kids strike out on their own; and it’s probably impossible to explain Joseph too much.
X-PLAINED:
The secret origin of Gideon
How to get deported from Latveria
Marvel en français
X-Force #11-15
Some gratuitous posturing
Pico
What the actual Domino has been up to
One hell of an outfit
Peacock powers
Crule
A comical mix-up
A somewhat radical cosmology
A very dramatic strike force
Tygerstryke
X-Force post-Liefeld
Weapon P.R.I.M.E.
A four-page spread
A fight for one is a fight for all
Vance Astro
The death of Copycat
Things only Cable and Domino could do
Joseph (more) (again)
Marvel style and its evolution
NEXT EPISODE: Fire, life, and backstory!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
We have no idea how accurate this depiction of Kamehameha Day is; but from what we’ve read, it sounds like a really cool holiday. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Our villains. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Also a villain. (The doctor, not the kid. The kid is just super doomed.) (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Nick Fury writes like a twelve-year-old girl, and that makes me so happy. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Wolverine rising from bodies of water: never not rad. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Meanwhile in a history that might have been… (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
“Turtleneck Dracula” doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, bro. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
I really legitimately love this dude’s design. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Seriously. Wolverine. Moonlight. Bodies of water. It’s a thing. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Despite evidence to the contrary, Shiv’s head is neither exploding nor severed in this panel. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
It’s hard to be a grown-up, Wolverine. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
“I’m ALSO sorry that S.H.I.E.L.D. never figured out a less passive-aggressive way to apologize.” (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
The second-best time Wolverine blew up a helicopter. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
And they all lived happily ever after. (Wolverine: Bloody Choices)
Damn, Fury, get some better mementos. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Dude sneaking up behind Wolverine is about to have the most anticlimactic day of his life. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Gahck is awesome. In other news, I’m really upset about the vertical spacing in that third balloon. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
SPINY HONKER (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Once more for the back row: THE HONKER OF DOOM! (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
I’m really just including this panel for the phrase “great rogue honker.” (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
THE HONKER OF DOOM! (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Gahck has no time for your nonsense. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
He looks so happy! (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Probably feasible? Maybe? Ehh, it’s Wolverine, we’ll allow it. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
I feel you, Robopocalypse. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
“Once you’re one of my horsemen, of course, you’ll have access to an excellent Employee Assistance Program, as well as paid time off!” (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
Wolverine has a LOT of semicanonical kids floating around the Marvel Universe. (Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure)
In which Wolverine is an eternal teenager; most of what Jay knows about Hawaii comes from Lilo and Stitch; Shiv is a complicated fellow; Nightcrawler represents an unattainable beauty standard; the Easter Bunny flies at dawn; Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure is delightful; Logan inadvertently starts a cult; Gahk does as she pleases; Jay and Miles are going to FlameCon; and we are all now Honkers forever.
X-PLAINED:
What Bloodscream and Roughouse have been up to
Albert and Elsie Dee
An unorthodox vocal warm-up
Wolverine: Bloody Choices
Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure
The Wolverine formula
Kamehameha Day (which Jay mispronounced; sorry!)
Mr. Bullfinch
Mr. Kapeland
Shiv
Doc Corbel
Nick Fury’s penmanship
How retail works
Secret agents, maybe
A stimulating combination
Karate pants
A darker, grittier version of the Easter bunny
Wolverine’s apocryphal childhood
Characters who can pull off the Wolverine hairstyle
Don Adams as Wolverine
Win/win murder scenarios
Two adult men discussing their feelings
Honkers
Cargo cults
The Tribe of Fire
Gahck
Some romance
A Spiny Honker
The Honker of Doom
Pit traps, with and without shallow holes
A dastardly but ineffectual plot
Apocalypse, kind of
One of Wolverine’s many kids (who may or may not be Erista)
Jay & Miles at FlameCon 2018
How to get us at your local convention
Reading comics with Miles’s dad
Seriously, though: honkers
NEXT EPISODE: Even more Excaliburs
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)