domino – Page 6 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

246 – Foreshadow Puppets

May 5, 2019 Jay 12 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Danielle Moonstar is not a master of disguise; the MLF are bad enough dudes to kidnap a guy who works near the president; Tempo wasn’t even supposed to be here today; Reignfire is no Magneto; we now desperately want X-Force matryoshka dolls; Feral quits the team; Henry Peter Gyrich fails to learn from experience (or anything else); small children are bad at everything; Shatterstar gets a tagline; Sam Guthrie REALLY needs a vacation; and it’s surprisingly difficult to choose a favorite resurrection.

X-PLAINED:

Cortex
The kinder, gentler Cable
Several matters related to Nicholas Cage
X-Force #27-30
Broome jaws
The Area jar
The Mutant Liberation Front
Reignfire (again)
Hardaway
A cyborg asshole
Locus
Moonstar
“Of Faith and Fable”
Foreshadow puppets
Bobby da Costa’s greatest fear
Dad jokes with Cable
X-Force’s day off
Shatterstar vs. Adam X the X-Treme
Windsong
An inevitable team-up
A Very Special Episode moment
The return of Wine Mom Domino
The return of Jean Grey’s telepathy
Our favorite resurrections

NEXT EPISODE: Sabretooth

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

December 23, 2018 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

I mean, it’s not that much worse than Botox. (Uncanny X-Men #301)

Of all the people Gamesmaster could choose to bring to the forefront of his mind, he chose these assholes. (Uncanny X-Men #301)

I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING (Uncanny X-Men #301)

Yes, yes, you’ve made some terrible mistakes, Forge – but at least you’re wearing those shorts again! (Uncanny X-Men #301)

Miles would totally buy that action figure. (Uncanny X-Men #301)

This is how you comic book. (Uncanny X-Men #301)

Damn, Romita. Damn, Storm. (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Just repeat to yourself: it’s just a show, I should really just relax! (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Plato called this “the noble lie”. (Uncanny X-Men #302)

You know, I guess that is about how you’d have to angle your hips if you were balancing on one leg because some green-haired jerk from the future cut off your other one. (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Should’ve known that guy was a racist asshole – look at the color of his baseball cap. (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Can’t blame the guy – for being furious or for pummeling Fitzroy. (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Yes, Jay, Kitty looks pretty weird in this panel, but – FEELINGS! (Uncanny X-Men #302)

Dammit, Friends of Humanity, give Madrox his outfit back! And also stop being murderous bigots! (X-Force #24)

Rusty and Skids have been focusing pretty hard on good posture since leaving the New Mutants. (X-Force #24)

Who has the worse employees, Sam Guthrie or Alex Summers? (X-Force #24)

“Thanks for holding me up while I practice my Liefeld kicks, buddy!” (X-Force #24)

Petey the Dog reference: $34.95. Improbable toaster gun: $1750.00. The look on Grizzly’s face: priceless.(X-Force #24)

Magneto is the best at Space Tetris. (X-Force #24)

Boom-Boom and Feral: best frenemies ever. (X-Force #24)

Remember, at least two of these characters used to train with X-Factor. (X-Force #24)

Boom-Boom and Feral: still the best frenemies ever. (X-Force #24)

Fair enough, kids. (X-Force #24)

Jay’s Warlock figure still kinda freaks Miles out.

Next time: our fifth annual Giant-Size Winter Special!

228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

December 23, 2018 Miles 8 comments

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In which it still sucks to be a Rasputin; John Romita Jr. has a solid, if muscular, grasp of anatomy; Jay and Miles are better exes than Forge and anyone; and Cannonball’s many younger siblings have almost prepared him for running X-Force.

X-PLAINED:

Peters Parker
The Merry X-Men Holiday Special
Comic book release schedules vs. J&MXPtXM
Uncanny X-Men #301-302
Trevor F**king Fitzroy, possibly the worst Upstart
Comics Code Authority closeting versus real-life closeting
21st Century Torture Devices
Risky mood fonts
Robert’s Rules of Upstart Order (this week)
Gamesmaster vs. the Isolationist
Shinobi Shaw: Good At Sex
Russian tragedy (more, again)
Charles Xavier and his poor decisions
Shi’ar tech support
Pants and villainy
Racist jerks vs. rhetorical questions
TIME PARADOX
Weirdly specific contingencies
Piotr Rasputin and his justified fury
X-Force #24
Meaningless (but fun!) timestamps
The Friends of Humanity (who are not our friends)
Rusty and Skids’ latest arrest
Disappointed Dad Sam Guthrie
Action vs. public perception
Vinz Clortho
Domino’s continuing quest to figure out what exactly an X-Force is
The dramatic return of… well, you know
Spacesuit logistics
Numerical universe designations
Plastic Warlock

NEXT EPISODE: Our Fifth Annual Giant-Size Winter Special!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 221 – Better Than LEGO

November 5, 2018 Jay One comment

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Bella, as seen on FaceTime between rounds of headbutting the phone.

The late, great, immensely fluffy Buzz Lightyear.

What, you thought this whole thing was just gonna be photos of cats? (Sorry) (X-Force #20)

Whoops. (X-Force #20)

That hair, though! Why, Shatterstar? WHY? (X-Force #20)

Those spacesuits look incredibly cumbersome. (X-Force #20)

You never forget your favorite ship. (X-Force #20)

That is a GREAT use of a spread. (X-Force #20)

X-Force really only has the one setting. (X-Force #21)

Aw. AW. (X-Force #21)

AWWWWWWWWW (X-Force #21)

“THE TEETH COMMAND IT!” (X-Force #21)

And that’s why you always leave a note. (X-Force #21)

“The guns were inside you all along!” (X-Force #22)

Well, then. (X-Force #22)

But he looks so happy about it! (X-Force #22)

I was gonna make a callback to that one tangent about how Cable probably carries a bunch of tampons because they are useful and he seems like the kind of dude who has a good attitude about menstruation, but it seemed too forced. (X-Force #22)

This is both excessive and silly, Gideon. (X-Force #22)

“Am I forever damned to eat crackers sideways?!” (X-Force #23)

Look at him! He’s just propped up in the corner! (X-Force #23)

OH, SNAP! (X-Force #23)

I’m still kind of peeved that this isn’t spelled out in Sam’s accent. It just feels wrong like this. (X-Force #23)

NEXT EPISODE: Psylocke vs. Revanche!

LINKS & FURTHER MONSTROSITIES:

221 – Better Than LEGO

November 5, 2018 Jay 12 comments

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In which Miles stops worrying and learns to love X-Force; you should absolutely not google the phrase “face jam”; the kids take a field trip to Graymalkin; Jay reverse-engineers Shatterstar’s hair; Donald Pierce gets a new job; Sam Guthrie is the most trustworthy man in the Marvel Universe; Cable is your guns grandma; Professor earns its name; X-Force really only has one setting; and not every Sluggo is lit.

X-PLAINED:

A bunch of stuff Quicksilver did
Several cats
X-Force #20-23
The Externals (more) (again)
A deeply unlikely hairstyle
Graymalkin / Ship / Professor
A somewhat one-sided reunion
Yahoos
Inaccurate arithmetic
Why Feral sounds like that
Neither Tom, Dick, nor Harry
War Machine (James Rhodes)
Salvage
Sam Guthrie’s long trail of dead father figures
Shatterstar
How to fight an External
The seventh plague
What Domino’s been up to
Hammer’s mom
Tigerstryke (more) (again)
Sluggo (but not that Sluggo)
Learning to appreciate the ’90s

NEXT EPISODE: Psylocke Vs. Revanche!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 207 – Blood and Metal

July 30, 2018 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Everyone in this comic book is yelling at all times. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

There is also a lot of leaping. The early ’90s were very leaping-heavy years. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Garrison, you delightful scamp! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

That’s right. The Six Pack is named after beer. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Grizzly is kind of a delight in this series. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Stryfe is ALWAYS a delight. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Look at these ridiculous guns. LOOK AT THEM. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

Every fight in this series is exuberantly ridiculous, and it’s great. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

Cable is a really, really terrible boss. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

More leaping! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

MORE LEAPING! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Having studied under Cable, Kane knows how to leap into battle. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Blood and Metal also does the action-movie thing where the hardboiled dialogue is often vaguely suggestive. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

“It makes sense, though. Having an evil clone runs in my family.” (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)

Yes, Garrison. Ninjas. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

That’s Stryfe; and this explains a thing or three. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

We forgot to mention this scene in the episode, but at one point, Garrison Kane is just randomly eating a fucking enormous sandwich. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

And then on the next page, he dramatically rips his shirt off, because, look, SOMETIMES YOU JUST GOTTA. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

Shorts! (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

Look, if you haven’t worked out that Stryfe looks like Cable by this point in the series, I’m not sure I can help you. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

I keep imagining Stryfe yelling, “Brother!” in Liquid Snake’s voice; and now you can, too. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

“I also got you some unflattering but comfortable briefs. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor gets political.

LINKS & FURTHER TOMFOOLERY:

DID YOU KNOW THAT WE’RE GOING TO BE AT FLAMECON? Of course you did, because we won’t shut up about it! Come see us at table P119, and check out the live episode!
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja is a masterpiece of modern literature; plus, it’s by the only person who will ever love Robocop vs. Terminator as much as Jay does.
The new She-Ra design is awesome, and so is all the fan art that it has inspired.
The Tim Minchin line Jay paraphrased in this episode comes from the song “White Wine in the Sun.”
Wanna hang out online with a bunch of really nice X-Men fans? Hell, yeah, you do! Join the X-Plain the X-Men Discord!

207 – Blood and Metal

July 30, 2018 Jay 21 comments

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In which Miles has a Dracula problem; we are really, really excited about FlameCon; Fabian Nicieza is the unsung hero of the early ’90s; Jay doesn’t explain the Iranian Hostage Crisis; Cable does not have a good history with trademark disputes; Cable: Blood and Metal is secretly an allegory for the X-books of the early 1990s; friendship and explosions don’t have to be mutually exclusive; and history evokes but doesn’t quite repeat itself.

X-PLAINED:

Dracula disambiguation
One way to stop a vampire invasion
Wang beams
Cable: Blood and Metal #1-2
The continuing miracle that is Fabian Nicieza
Cable (as established in 1992)
Stryfe
The Wild Pack and/or Six Pack
The ongoing evolution of John Romita, Jr.
Tolliver
Several heists of varying quality
Numerous patches and their contents
How the Wild Pack became the Six Pack
An idiom, examined
A total dick move
Muscles-and-guns power creep
Guns of tomorrow
The McNinja point
A brief flirtation with Magic: The Gathering
A typo that became canon
The new She-Ra
The new, improved Garrison Kane
European nipple lasers
Mr. Richter
The evolution of Cable

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor gets political.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 205 – Back to Basics

July 15, 2018 Jay 5 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Okay, but seriously, he could have gotten that cape anywhere. (X-Force #11)

Early Deadpool was just kind of a jerk. (X-Force #11)

In which Garrison Kane and all of his teeth are watching you poop. (X-Force #11)

The best thing about this is that Rictor’s shirt changes color from green to read between issues, and I have decided that it is DEFINITELY Hypercolor(TM). (X-Force #11)

Hi, Crule. (X-Force #12)

Somewhere, Flash Gordon is very confused and very naked. (X-Force #12)

Just posting this for Rictor’s outfit, which really only gets more remarkable with every drawing. (X-Force #12)

If I were a better person, I might have pasted this together with the other half of the four-page spread… (X-Force #13)

…but, alas, I’m not. (X-Force #13)

Thaaaaaat’s our Cable! (X-Force #13)

Yeahno. (X-Force #13)

I really like the way Shoemaker draws battle-damaged Cable. (X-Force #14)

MY FEELINGS (X-Force #14)

Awk-ward. (X-Force #14)

Spoiler: FRIENDSHIP WINS. (X-Force #15)

And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn’t been for you meddling kids! (X-Force #15)

NEXT EPISODE: Fire, life, and backstory!

LINKS:

You can learn all about Garrison Kane in Episode 195 – Johnny Got His Robot Arm.
Should you find yourself in Brussels, Jay recommends Utopia for all your superhero comics needs.
Mitchell is a terrible movie but a very good episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000; which latter you can watch here.

205 – Back to Basics

July 15, 2018 Jay 17 comments

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Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which Jay returns from Latveria; Sabretooth is significantly less menacing in French; Fabian Nicieza takes the reins; X-Force wins our hearts and minds; Gideon plunders Flash Gordon’s wardrobe; Crule does not actually rule; Rictor was right; Ship is the friend who helps you move, but better; the X-Force kids strike out on their own; and it’s probably impossible to explain Joseph too much.

X-PLAINED:

The secret origin of Gideon
How to get deported from Latveria
Marvel en français
X-Force #11-15
Some gratuitous posturing
Pico
What the actual Domino has been up to
One hell of an outfit
Peacock powers
Crule
A comical mix-up
A somewhat radical cosmology
A very dramatic strike force
Tygerstryke
X-Force post-Liefeld
Weapon P.R.I.M.E.
A four-page spread
A fight for one is a fight for all
Vance Astro
The death of Copycat
Things only Cable and Domino could do
Joseph (more) (again)
Marvel style and its evolution

NEXT EPISODE: Fire, life, and backstory!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 195 – Johnny Got His Robot Arm

April 29, 2018 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

LOOK AT ALL THOSE POUCHES. (X-Force #8)

And now for something completely different. (X-Force #8)

Fun fact: You can drop this dialogue into almost any panel involving Cable and at least one other character, and it’ll still work. (X-Force #8)

On one hand: Mignola is great. On the other hand: I have some questions about the decision to just straight-up draw Garrison Kane as Marlon Brando. (X-Force #8)