In which we return to Excalibur, and Excalibur returns to form; “Girls’ School from Heck” is way better than we remembered; Jay has strong feelings about penmanship; we examine the semantics of field hockey; the band gets back together; Dai Thomas has no time for your comic-book bullshit; and you should never, ever install a good/evil switch in your technological abominations.
X-PLAINED
The first appearances of Colonel Vazhin
Perks of home recording
FlameCon 2017
Jay & Miles at Rose City Comic Con
Excalibur #32-36
“Girls’ School from Heck!”
St. Searle’s School for Young Ladies
St. Trinian’s and a large number of references thereto
Regional variations in boarding school hijinks
Miss Rutherford
A poorly staged panel
Phoebe Huntsman
Kitty Pryde’s penmanship
Margaret Thatcher’s weirdly wholesome fantasies
The kinda-reformation of Mesmero
The end of Chris Claremont’s run on Excalibur
Some complicated contradictions related to the ethics of consumption
An abduction
The ethics of psychic interrogation (kinda)
Mariner disambiguation
A rescue
An unlikely partnership
Darkmoor Research Center
Dr. Walshe
A somewhat convoluted plot
Whether the Danger Room could function as a bathroom
The physics of Asteroid M
NEXT EPISODE: Weapon X!
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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
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Special thanks to Gavia Baker-Whitelaw for helping us assemble the St. Searle’s marginalia!
In which the Cross-Time Caper has finally outstayed its welcome; we bid a reluctant farewell to Alan Davis; Inferno may or may not finally actually be over; Evil Doug Ramsey rocks our socks; the Shadow King is not a particularly nuanced villain; Kitty Pryde celebrates a birthday; and Courtney Ross represents an awful lot of dangling plot threads.
X-PLAINED:
Nocturne
Excalibur #21-24
The end of the Cross-Time Caper
Post-Alan Davis Excalibur
Chris Wozniak
Crusader X
Earth-2122
How to track Excalibur
Phoenix-related telepathic idiosyncracies
Our general indifference to the Shadow King
An alternate history of Earth-811
Earth-23238
An extended Judge Dredd riff
Puberty
Another John Byrne cameo
Several variations on Courtney Ross
Kitty Pryde’s 15th birthday
Nightcrawler’s beard
The Siege Courageous
NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special, featuring Kid Apocalypse & Dennis Hopeless!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
In which we find the idea of Jack Kirby as G-d deeply comforting; “Jercules” is our new favorite insult; the difference between camp and divinity is good backlighting; Zeus does not have the moral high ground; Ron Lim’s Captain Britain is the definitive cad; the Demon Druid is the saddest supervillain; Archangel broods like it’s his day job; and Jay gets to do all the fun voices for once.
X-PLAINED:
The Upstarts
An inflatable Batman
New Mutants #81
Excalibur #20
X-Factor #47
Our favorite Magma story
The best insult
Pugilistic impunity
A context-inappropriate oath
The worst film festival
Fighting fire with Magma
The Demon Druid
A Satanic pirate tavern
Reactorhenge
The depths of fuchsia
Archangel’s deeply weird comfort mechanisms
Some dude named Greg
Publishing delays
NEXT WEEK: Lady Mandarin, feat. Sarah Kuhn
You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
Yeah, Inferno’s basically just gonna be business as usual for Excalibur. (Excalibur #5)
I accept on faith that there are people who read this and assumed that Kitty and Rachel didn’t have a romantic relationship, but it still kind of baffles me. (Excalibur #5)
Bye, Courtney. (Excalibur #5)
Seriously, Excalibur has the greatest covers. (Excalibur #6)
“Oh, yeah, there IS another Summers kid that we kinda forgot about in all the chaos!” (Excalibur #6)
Yeah, I’m with Meggan on this one. (Excalibur #6)
This makes somewhat less sense if you remember that these two have in fact met before. (Excalibur #6)
Evil Meggan is a snappy dresser. (Excalibur #6)
And then that happened. (Excalibur #6)
THOSE COVERS THO (Excalibur #7)
Please take the Billy Idol joke as read. (Excalibur #7)
HEY LOOK IT’S JAY IN COLLEGE (Excalibur #7)
And now for something completely different! (Excalibur #7)
The fact that it’s Doug makes this scene both sadder and creepier. (Excalibur #7)
R.I.P., Best Gargoyle Ever. (Excalibur #7)
And you thought the Goblin Prince’s outfit was scandalous. (Excalibur #7)
Nazi Moira and Callisto: Evil, but fashionable. (Excalibur #6)
In which Wolverine gets a wolverine; the Crazy Gang meets their match; Inferno is business as usual for Excalibur; Alan Davis covers are the best covers; David Wynne makes his on-air debut; Courtney Ross is more competent than you; Murderworld operates on a dubious economic model; Nightcrawler is the anti-Nice Guy™, and everything basically works out for the best.
X-PLAINED:
Wolverine’s wolverine
A subtle but critical spelling difference
Excalibur #4-7
The greatest comic-book cover of all time
Dialogue on covers
Courtney Ross
Edwardian power suits
Arcade (again)
The dubious economics of Murderworld
The Looney Toones school of sexploitation
Search terms
Fashion in Excalibur
A mundane but useful superpower
The death of Courtney Ross
Perils of transatlantic flight
The Goblin Princess
A really excellent gargoyle
Several cinematic references
A very revealing outfit
Brigadier Alysande Stuart
Sinister fashion
Still more Limbo disambiguation
NEXT WEEK: Infero Post-Game, with Sam Humphries
Special thanks to David Wynne.
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
It’s the front-cover equivalent of the slow-motion hero walk. (Excalibur #1)
Hi, Widget! (Excalibur #1)
Kitty is ridiculous and also awesome. (Excalibur #1)
Nigel “The Worst” Frobisher. (Excalibur #1)
Aw, man. (Excalibur #1)
Welcome to the perfectly ordinary lighthouse full of perfectly ordinary rooms! Hope you survive the… (Excalibur #1)
“No one can move in Rachel’s costume except Rachel” is going to become a running joke over the course of the series. (Excalibur #1)
Somewhere there’s a universe where Meggan grew up watching Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23, in which this scene went very differently. (Excalibur #1)
Vixen, never change. (Excalibur #2)
The Warwolves are awful, but also fairly delightful. (Excalibur #2)
Oh, dear me. (Excalibur #2)
HIJINKS! (Excalibur #2)
Well, that happened. (Excalibur #2)
This cannot POSSIBLY end well. (Excalibur #2)
Alan Davis covers are the best covers. (Excalibur #3)
SOMEHOW TEAM VIXEN’S OUTFITS GOT EVEN BETTER. (Excalibur #3)
And so it goes. (Excalibur #3)
Well done, Kitty. (Excalibur #3)
Well done, Kurt. (Excalibur #3)
FRIENDSHIP! (Excalibur #3)
Including this panel purely for Kurt’s dashing outfit. (Excalibur #3)
PERFECTLY NORMAL LIGHTHOUSE. NOTHING TO SEE HERE. (Excalibur #3)
In which Excalibur is x-tra x-ceptional; we once again gush at length about Alan Davis; Kurt Wagner is reliable with the ladies; nothing in Excalibur is ever perfectly normal; Warwolves are regular folks; Brian Braddock still doesn’t get to take a bath; Jay overthinks a question; and there’s more where that came from!
X-PLAINED:
The Unstoppable Juggernaut
Earth-10724
Jay & Miles at Emerald City Comicon
Excalibur #1-3
Fun
The Crazy Gang (again)
The somewhat ignominious death of Ray Mulholland
Warwolves
Nigel Frobisher
A somewhat dubious ploy
Bathroom etiquette
Widget
A kid named Colin
Rupert Holloway
Friendship, kind of
The Lighthouse
Courtney Ross
Excalibur vs. the Juggernaut
Kitty’s powers
An exceptionally specific theoretical crossover
NEXT WEEK: Checking in on the current state of the X-line, with guest Brett White!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!