colossus – Page 4 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

428 – Naked in a Cake

October 22, 2023 Miles 9 comments

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In which you shouldn’t invite nazis to your wedding, there’s a lot of multiverse, Captain Britain and Meggan are pretty heteronormative but make it work, everybody forgot Feron, and the next husband will be Gatecrasher’s.

X-PLAINED:

Captain Britain varieties
The history of Brian Braddock and Meggan Puceanu, abridged
Excalibur #124-125
Mutants most likely to jump out of a cake
The Crazy Gang (again)
Meggan’s crush on Colossus
Colossus’s guilt about Meggan’s crush on Colossus
A surprise bridal shower
The return of Captain UK
Brian Braddock’s teetotaling techniques
Mimic’s ever-changing facial hair
Glorious, glorious chaos
Poor, poor Feron
Multiple awkward conversations
The return of Widget and also everyone else
Lightning Force (dammit)
A lengthy but not exhaustive list of Captains Britain
So many cameos
…Seriously, so many cameos
Dai Thomas’s anti-iron
Shockingly healthy communication
Bouquet brawls and garter gar-nage
A bittersweet ending
Nightcrawler’s best outfit
The universe where the X-Men X-Plain Jay & Miles
Our hypothetical post-finale Excalibur lineup

NEXT EPISODE: The return of X-Factor! Kind of!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 423 – Moby Dick Ice Cream

September 10, 2023 Jay Leave a comment

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Probably not even the fanciest trash can on Muir Island. (Excalibur #121)

She’s fun. (Excalibur #121)

It’s no SMEK, but it’ll do.

What’s doubly interesting about this is that David’s personality isn’t actually there. (Excalibur #121)

And off they go. (Excalibur #121)

Hmm. (Excalibur #122)

That’s a lot of hair. (Excalibur #122)

Spoiler: Not actually the X-Men. (Excalibur #122)

The Mimic and his beard. (Excalibur #122)

The sound of love. (Excalibur #122)

Aw, those wacky kids. (Excalibur #123)

The now-beardless Mimic. (Excalibur #123)

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor explodes.

423 – Moby Dick Ice Cream

September 10, 2023 Jay 6 comments

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In which subtlety is not Sabra’s strong point; Moira takes a vacation; Meggan broods; you should take care in referencing the Dark Phoenix Saga; Excalibur may or may not shave Mimic; and Captain Britain is a silly man.

X-PLAINED:

Ghosts
Excalibur #121-123
The Mutant Underground
Empathic recon
An extremely disgruntled kiss
Kitty’s new costume
Several of Legion’s personalities
A mysterious disk
A very fancy trash can and/or ice cream maker
Ice cream of Cloud City
A good dog
Remains of Operation Zero Tolerance
The devolution of Douglock
Mimic (Calvin Rankin)
Mimic’s facial hair
Some Prime Sentinels
Wedding planning
Liking parts of things
Villains who want to marry Storm
Maddy Pryor

NEXT EPISODE: The end of X-Factor!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 421 – Dudleyworld or Bust

August 27, 2023 Jay Leave a comment

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Fast times at Dudleyworld! (Colossus #1)

Aw, these wacky kids.(Colossus #1)

Note: This is supposed to be taking place during the day. (Colossus #1)

EliSabeth, you mean! (Colossus #1)

The Proletarian! (Colossus #1)

BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T TELL HER WHAT WAS GOING ON. (Colossus #1)

On the scale of bad disguises, I’ve seen worse. (Colossus #1)

He’s smooth, I’ll give him that. (X-Men Unlimited #19)

“What the HELL, Mom?!” (X-Men Unlimited #19)

See what I mean about her head? (X-Men Unlimited #19)

My kingdom for follow-through on this tease. (X-Men Unlimited #19)

NEXT EPISODE: The secret origin of Maggott!

421 – Dudleyworld or Bust

August 20, 2023 Jay 3 comments

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In which one letter can make a big difference; it’s just not Arcade without giant pinballs; Colossus is nobody’s fool; Margali Szardos is not a relative you want to stay in touch with; Nightcrawler turns to the jerk side; and Jay and Miles pitch an X-Men kids’ show.

X-PLAINED:

Elisabeth Wilford vs. Elizabeth Wilford
Colossus #1
X-Men Unlimited #19
How to name a miniseries or one-shot
The destructive potential of happiness
A clock
An inaccurate duplicate of Avalon
The return of the Proletarian
Costumes with characters’ faces on them
Death by irony
A journey to Limbo
Several blasts from the past
Margali Szardos’s head
Foreshadowing that we desperately wish had panned out
Cold open curation
A hypothetical X-Men show for five-year-olds

NEXT EPISODE: The secret origin of Maggott

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 402 – What the Damn?!

February 26, 2023 Miles Leave a comment

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Shadowcat, Douglock, and… Hard-Boiled Harry?! (Excalibur #114)

Sari St. Hubbins, Fashion Plate: Part 1. (Excalibur #114)

Colossus would have bought a hat too, but then where would he keep all that hair? (Excalibur #114)

Captain Mustache, Part the First. (Excalibur #114)

I’m a firestarter, twisted firestarter (Excalibur #114)

Katherine Pryde, experienced superhero. (Excalibur #114)

Sari St. Hubbins, Fashion Plate: Part 2. (Excalibur #114)

Captain Mustache, Part the Second. (Excalibur #115)

Banshee is so muscly! And his cape is so foldy! (Excalibur #115)

Mel Rubi’s Douglock. (Excalibur #115)

Miles’s average day in IT looks pretty much like this. (Excalibur #115)

“Plus some Externals, but… I don’t think any of us really want to spent the time to talk about them.” (Excalibur #115)

He is so sweet. (Excalibur #115)

“Freakin’ last boss of Ninja Gaiden sends me all the way back to the beginning of the level even when I still have lives left..!” (Excalibur #115)

When Meggan’s happy, I’m happy. (Excalibur #115)

Aww jeez you two (Excalibur #115)

It’s been an honor, Shepherd. (Excalibur #115)

Check out that sweet shadow-invisible hand! (Excalibur #116)

Mel Rubi does Paul Smith. (Excalibur #116)

Where did that costume end up? You should break it out again, Captain Kate! (Excalibur #116)

So that mutagenic agent made the Sidri… swole? (Excalibur #116)

“It’s-a-me, Stereotype!” (Excalibur #116)

Pete Wisdom in: Terminator 2. (Excalibur #116)

Triple-wielding! (Excalibur #116)

Additional swordplay – this time, in callback form! (Excalibur #116)

They pulled his collectivism out through his belly button..? (Excalibur #116)

Hey, that’s not what Kitty wears in her SHIELD miniseries! Kinda wish it was, though. (Excalibur #116)

NEXT EPISODE: Kitty Pryde goes to work for The Man

402 – What the Damn?!

February 26, 2023 Miles 7 comments

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In which Marvel UK was a wild ride; everyone has a definitive Kitty Pryde; Sari St. Hubbins studies her X-Men; Moira MacTaggert discovers contagion theory; ideas do not stories make; Meggan is the heart of the team; and Excalibur inches towards its finale.

X-PLAINED:

Marvel UK
Digitek
Excalibur #114-117
What Excalibur’s been up to
Tunnels vs. sewers
An unexpected callback
Slang
The mutability of Kitty Pryde
Friendship
Sari St. Hubbins
Fashion
One way to get around a power inhibitor
A frosted tips outline
Viruses
Phalanx love
Greebling
A substantial retcon
Excalibur vs. the Sidri
Marvel characters’ musical associations
Whether there have been more X-Men or Avengers

NEXT EPISODE: Kitty Pryde goes to work for The Man

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 387 – You’ve Got Vid-Mail

October 2, 2022 Jay Leave a comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Colossus is a good friend and will call you on your bullshit. (Excalibur #111)

Rory Campbell, now with two legs and excessive foreshortening. (Excalibur #111)

I hate this party. (Excalibur #111)

Daaaaaamn, Kurt. (Excalibur #111)

Welcome to the CITADEL OF SCIENCE! (Excalibur #112)

Now we are bros. (Excalibur #113)

Meet the Knights of Wundagore! They are delightful. (Excalibur #113)

NEVER LET THIS MAN BABYSIT YOUR CHILD (Excalibur #113)

Doug, no. Letterer, NO. (Excalibur #112)

Moira’s hair got LONG. (Excalibur #113)

AW! (Excalibur #113)

They just don’t make dens of sin and iniquity like they used to. (Excalibur #112)

Je suis un chic type / Qui joue la guitare. (Excalibur #113)

Shades of Transmetropolitan.(Excalibur #113)

NEXT EPISODE: Shang-Chi!

LINKS & FURTHER MISUNDERSTANDINGS:

“Je Suis Rick Springfield,” in all its glory.

387 – You’ve Got Vid-Mail

October 2, 2022 Jay 11 comments

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In which Colossus is good at friendship; nobody notices when Amanda Sefton disappears; evil peaked in the disco era; and Pete Wisdom had hot claws before it was cool.

X-PLAINED:

Fun times on Mount Wundagore
Excalibur #111-113
Rob Stotz
Brooding
Friendship
Rory Campbell (again)
The return of Sebastian Shaw
MIS departments
Two versions of the same conversation
A palette-swapped wardrobe
Invincible Head Technique
A polite murderer
Ogun, again
A brief possession
Mount Wundagore
Bova
Sir Ram
Ursula
Lord Gator
The Knights of Wundagore
Ace Duck
The High Evolutionary
Artistic turnover
A kiss
Were-girlfriends
A sin-filled and disreputable club
“Je Suis Rick Springfield”
Storylines we’d like to see from bystanders’ perspectives
Professor X’s crush on Marvel Girl

NEXT EPISODE: Shang-Chi!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 371 – Beware of Psychodrama

May 8, 2022 Miles Leave a comment

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Before settling on paint and canvas, Piotr Rasputin’s first medium was the thought balloon. (Excalibur #104)

Douglock tries. (Excalibur #104)

Moira, I know a lot of us have been working from home for a while now, but you may have overdone the whole home-office thing just a tad. (Excalibur #104)