colossus – Page 2 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

445 – Dick War

April 7, 2024 Jay 10 comments

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In which not every story needs to be an event; Alan Davis returns to the X-line; X-mansion security is not what it once was; Rogue needs some new fantasies; and Magneto wants a country.

X-PLAINED:

A poor governance decision
X-Men: The Magneto War #1
Uncanny X-Men #366
Astral demerits
A very dramatic dream
The yolk of oppression
Several Acolytes
Nightcrawler’s nightcap
Our standards for advertisers
Suburban Magneto
Ferris
Magnet problems
Forged DNA
Mutants from Georgia, Florida, and Indiana
Flying with Storm

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 444 – Damnit, Magnus

March 31, 2024 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Domino: wine mom, but also good mom. (X-Force #86)

WRONG FREEZER WRONG FREEZER (X-Force #86)

Theresa Rourke Cassidy, mistress of disguise. (X-Force #86)

Remember how Moonstar’s weird new powers are always accompanied by a cosmic blue glow? This issue doesn’t, and is thus… confusing. (X-Force #86)

Odysseus Indigo, the most dapper of antagonists. (X-Force #86)

Some exceptionally efficient visual storytelling by Jim Cheung. (X-Force #86)

Christmas in March! Well, March for us. December for Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Hey, it’s that thing Miles used to draw in middle school! How’d that get there?! (Uncanny X-Men #365)

In which Colossus interrupts a very manly threesome. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

The X-Men X-Plain X-Mas. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

I mean, that’s Rusty Collins, right? (Uncanny X-Men #365)

“My favorite X-Men character? You probably haven’t heard of him.” (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Oof, my emotions… (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Aww. (Uncanny X-Men #365)

Now that is a cover. (X-Men #85)

In which the first page establishes that this story will be a Big Deal. (X-Men #85)

Sorry, Bill… today’s gonna be a rough one. (X-Men #85)

We missed Alan Davis. (X-Men #85)

Uh oh. (X-Men #85)

Heroes. (X-Men #85)

This issue uses juxtaposition perfectly. (X-Men #85)

Magneto gets the answer he wants… and then the answer he doesn’t. (X-Men #85)

NEXT TIME: The Magneto War begins.

LINKS & FURTHER FESTIVITIES

RSVP to our 10th birthday party!

444 – Damnit, Magnus

March 31, 2024 Miles 5 comments

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In which it’s difficult to flee with soup; Miles may or may not be haunting the X-Men; Colossus collaborates involuntarily; Marrow is full of surprises; Magneto is a dick; Jay continues to carry a torch for Secret Wars: Siege; and you should totally come to our birthday party.

X-PLAINED:

Several rather pointed allusions
X-Force #86
Uncanny X-Men #365
X-Men #85
Almost Reno, NM
Where mutants come from
The Aguilar Institute (more) (again)
Abandoned towns
Mary the telepathic moppet (more) (again)
Odysseus Indigo
The Damocles Foundation
Sibling names
The Fundamental Attribution Error
A haunting
Christmas beer
Christmas ghost exquisite corpse
Bill Jones
A rescue mission
Essential stories of the ‘90s
Our weird favorites
Siege
Our upcoming 10^th birthday party (more) (again)

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto War begins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 442 – MimeQuest 64

March 3, 2024 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

A story in four parts. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

They have fun. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

In a world of clean-lined cartoony art, Logan is craggy. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

#roasted (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Any of the X-Men could wear that map as a dress! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

(New) Girl Talk (X-Men Unlimited #22)

A well-armed mime-litia. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Patrick Gleason, master of visually engaging conversations. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

And you told your math teacher you’d never need to know this stuff in real life. (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Shadowcat and Marrow miniseries now, please! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

See, it’s funny, because normally MetroCards charge you! (X-Men Unlimited #22)

Space Ghost: “Dames are like mustard: they taste great on a sandwich. But when you’re not eating a sandwich… they just sit there in the fridge… on a shelf… in a jar… labeled… mustard.” (X-Men Unlimited #22)

1963! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1969! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1978! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1980 (but in the future of 2013)! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

Back to 1975! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1980 again, but not in an alternate future this time! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1982! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1985! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1999! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

1993! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

Still 1993, but we had to include the Hate Goblin. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

More 1993. Doom needs a bigger vacuum cleaner. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)

NEXT TIME: Miles talks X-Retail with Katie Pryde of Books With Pictures!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

RSVP for our live episode and 10th birthday party on April 13th in Portland!
Follow us on Bluesky!
Jay’s Voice of Latveria episode about X-Men / Doom Annual 1998!
And a Mutant: Intersectionality in Marjorie Liu’s Astonishing X-Men by Stephanie Burt!

442 – MimeQuest 64

March 3, 2024 Jay 5 comments

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In which Marrow remains a connoisseur of dead rats; Jay has opinions about the NYC Subway system; U.L.T.I.M.A.T.U.M. are snazzy dressers; Doctor Doom gets excited about Onslaught; Magneto can have a rocket pack if he wants; villainous game recognizes villainous game; weird retcons are the best retcons; and you should totally come to our birthday party.

X-PLAINED:

A peculiar side effect of Wolverine’s healing factor
Jay & Miles on Bluesky (and other social media)
Our upcoming 10^th birthday party and live show (and related announcements)
X-Men Unlimited #22
X-Men/Doctor Doom Annual 1998
An unpleasant way to wake up
That’s so Kraven
Avengers and transit cops
U.L.T.I.M.A.T.U.M.
Flag Smasher
Some miscellaneous New York Subway trivia
Audience stand-ins (and how the reading experience changes when the audience stand-in isn’t human-passing)
Additional New York Subway trivia
Premonitions of Onslaught
An X-Men highlight reel
A delightful little retcon
One way to ruin X-Men #137
Healing factor preferences

NEXT EPISODE: Miles and Katie Pryde X-Plain Comics Retail!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

February 11, 2024 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (X-Men #83)

PHWOOOOOSH PKOOOM YAAIIIHEEE SWOOOOOOOOOSSS (X-Men #83)

‘Sup, demonic sperm? (X-Men #83)

From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)

What if Pinocchio but evil Colossus-bot? (X-Men #83)

The other Cerebr(o/ite) design. (X-Men #83)

Design by David Cronenberg? (Uncanny X-Men #364)

Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (Again again again!) (Uncanny X-Men #364)

The best version of Post. (Uncanny X-Men #364)

Wolverine: vigilante relationship counselor and motivational speaker. (Uncanny X-Men #364)

Eeeuuuugghhh (Uncanny X-Men #364)

Charles Xavier: the world’s most ripped telepath. (X-Men #84)

Cerebro Prime has almost completed its Pokédex! (X-Men #84)

Colossus practices his witty banter. (X-Men #84)

Oil and razor blades and cotton candy and (X-Men #84)

The Xavier Protocols are gorier than expected. (X-Men #84)

Imagine all the people (X-Men #84)

Back home and back to the status quo. (X-Men #84)

NEXT TIME: Dracula.

Links and further reading:

440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

February 11, 2024 Miles 6 comments

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In which the Hunt for Xavier remains vaguely disappointing; Gambit is good with kids; nanomachines are the new unstable molecules; Marrow is a walking armory; and we recommend comics for babies.

X-PLAINED:

The Hunt for Xavier, Part 2
Babies and/or ghosts
Chekhov’s repowering
X-Men #83-84
Uncanny X-Men #364
Cerebro / Cerebro Prime
Cerebrite Alpha
Cerebrite Beta
X-Men serial numbers
What Gambit’s friends call him
How Miles stopped worrying and learned to love Gambit
Evil robot sperm
Mary Purcell
Multiple-monitor displays
A computer with a computer
AI
The Florida facility
Post
Pile-Driver X
A glimpse into the butt of all humanity
Comics for babies
Name-based powers

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X has Dracula problems!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 439 – Fishfic

February 4, 2024 Miles 4 comments

Listen to the episode here.

A very loud search party. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Stooges in shorts. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

The Continuing Saga of Gambit & the Gassy Lady. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Storm and Marrow have their best conversations while fucking up automobiles. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

*Driving rock intro* (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Gassy ladies, fire ladies… It hard to be Gambit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

This version of Cerebro doesn’t require telepathy to use, but it does require a cute outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

In medias swamp-rat. (X-Men #82)

He has agreed to take me / To the ice hotel from the magazine (X-Men #82)

Whoa indeed, Keanu. (X-Men #82)

You’ve all had that dream too, right? (X-Men #82)

Clockwise from top-left: blood, black bile, phlegm, yellow bile. (X-Men #82)

I have no idea what kind of metal band Cerebro fronts, but I would listen to them. (X-Men #82)

I miss Toad’s too-many-Liefeldian-teeth look, but this one’s pretty great. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Maybe the post-Fall era of X-Men will finally explain what Wolverine smelled. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Cerebro’s other outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

What’s… what’s happening here?! (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Shoulda just complimented her classic fedora-‘n’-trenchcoat look. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Meanwhile, in the margins of a Wolverine one-shot… (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Somewhat new, somewhat different. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

NEXT TIME: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

439 – Fishfic

February 4, 2024 Miles 9 comments

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In which we reach the beginning of an end; Jay totally forgot Gambit was there; we’re all living in the Mary Purcelliverse; the X-Men split the party; and we explore The Bay Area’s Bohemian Hotbed of Student Anarchy.

X-PLAINED:

Mary Purcell (sort of)
The re-defaulting of the X-Men
Uncanny X-Men #362-323
X-Men #82
Nebraska
Pyro (Saint John Allerdyce) and his endless illness
Legacy Virus variations
Going home again
Running back and forth in quarries
Marrow, who’s come a long way
The two forms of fire: skeleton monsters and sexy ladies
Cerebro (the evil one)
San Francisco and Tajikinistan
Asphalt ball pits
A topsy-turvy nonsensical impossible hell
Nina the Mannite
Desire, love, loss, and fear
Skulls and spines
The New (New) Brotherhood of Mutants
Cerebrites Alpha and Beta
A lost, smelly fish
Ambiguous art
Blood, sweat, and fears
Which mutants would cause the most chaos at holiday gatherings
Hopes for post-Fall society

NEXT EPISODE: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!