In which one letter can make a big difference; it’s just not Arcade without giant pinballs; Colossus is nobody’s fool; Margali Szardos is not a relative you want to stay in touch with; Nightcrawler turns to the jerk side; and Jay and Miles pitch an X-Men kids’ show.
X-PLAINED:
Elisabeth Wilford vs. Elizabeth Wilford
Colossus #1
X-Men Unlimited #19
How to name a miniseries or one-shot
The destructive potential of happiness
A clock
An inaccurate duplicate of Avalon
The return of the Proletarian
Costumes with characters’ faces on them
Death by irony
A journey to Limbo
Several blasts from the past
Margali Szardos’s head
Foreshadowing that we desperately wish had panned out
Cold open curation
A hypothetical X-Men show for five-year-olds
NEXT EPISODE: The secret origin of Maggott
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In which Colossus is good at friendship; nobody notices when Amanda Sefton disappears; evil peaked in the disco era; and Pete Wisdom had hot claws before it was cool.
X-PLAINED:
Fun times on Mount Wundagore
Excalibur #111-113
Rob Stotz
Brooding
Friendship
Rory Campbell (again)
The return of Sebastian Shaw
MIS departments
Two versions of the same conversation
A palette-swapped wardrobe
Invincible Head Technique
A polite murderer
Ogun, again
A brief possession
Mount Wundagore
Bova
Sir Ram
Ursula
Lord Gator
The Knights of Wundagore
Ace Duck
The High Evolutionary
Artistic turnover
A kiss
Were-girlfriends
A sin-filled and disreputable club
“Je Suis Rick Springfield”
Storylines we’d like to see from bystanders’ perspectives
Professor X’s crush on Marvel Girl
NEXT EPISODE: Shang-Chi!
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You’ve come a long way from tick-tick-boom, Tabitha. (X-Force #63)
Dammit, X-Force! You were already living in the same house as the X-Men, and now you have their color scheme too? (X-Force #63)
When continuity is character. (X-Force #63)
Oh, great, it’s that dream again. (X-Force #63)
Yep, Lila Cheney is just that good. (X-Force #63)
“Alright, Agents! Just like we practiced: POSE!” (X-Force #63)
Ah, come on, Bobby – you’ve been to space and multiple other dimensions. Get over yourself. (X-Force #64)
Meanwhile in Spookytown (X-Force #64)
GAVEEDRA BENJAMIN SEVEN YOU PUT THOSE SWORDS DOWN RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR (X-Force #64)
But… but ambush is the exact thing you just did! (X-Force #64)
We immediately love John Francis Moore’s Meltdown. (X-Force #64)
We’ve missed you, Julio. (X-Force #64)
Michael McCain, AKA Forearm, AKA a guy in a shirt best described as “normal”. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
You put that down! Bad dog! Drop it! DROP IT! (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Meltdown auditions for Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Like the Rainbow Bridge but somehow more cosmic! Or at least differently cosmic. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Presenting Malekith the Accursed. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Is Caliban huge or is Shatterstar tiny? The world will never know! (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Our high school English teacher always told us we needed to learn the rules of writing so we could more effectively break them. This page does that with its panel borders. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Mutants and dwarves and giants, oh my! (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
Hela: goddess of death and high fashion. (Cable & X-Force Annual 1997)
In which we begin John Francis Moore’s run on X-Force; Latveria is less fun without Doctor Doom; there may still be a tiny clone of Meltdown running around; Forearm is a good pal; Marvel Asgard is a realm of crossover fan fiction; and you should totally watch both Our Flag Means Death and Doom Patrol.
X-PLAINED:
Blackbeard, somewhat
X-Force #63-64
X-Force & Cable Annual 1997
Life after Onslaught
Dimitri Fortunov
Dr. Doom’s time podium
New costumes
Liddleville
Latveria, 1941
Sturmfanger
Valkyrie (Brunhilde)
Aragorn (but not that one)
The Mutant Liberation Front (again) (briefly)
A large dog who may or may not have eaten a horse
Valkyries (more) (again)
What all the former New Mutants are up to
Yggdrasil and the Nine Realms (again)
Malekith the Accursed
Kindra the Dwarf (again)
Skadi the Frost Giant
Hela (again) (briefly)
Doctor Who analogs
What we miss about the Silver Age
NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk
NEXT EPISODE: Domino goes solo!
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Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This month, TeePublic is matching our sales with a donation to Equality Florida!!!
In which Excalibur has a lot going on; Margali Szardos is never up to any good; Nightcrawler grows into leadership; we delve into the politics of superheroism; Pete Wisdom earns his keep; Miles catches a Prisoner reference; and we reach the end of Warren Ellis’ Excalibur.
X-PLAINED:
John the Skrull
Excalibur #100-103
The current state of Excalibur
Black Air (again)
The Hellfire Club (London Branch)
Australia
Margali Szardos (more)
Demonic ethernet
Captain Britain’s new-old suit
Emma Steed
Dune
Several fights
Combat IT
Boolean definitions of madness
The Department
Laserdisks
Patriotism
Many doppelgangers
Nightcreeper
Another reference to Dante’s Inferno
NEXT EPISODE: Some absolute nonsense
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In which Excalibur is beset by shady organizations; Nightcrawler gets a new look; nobody hates Pete Wisdom as much as Lockheed hates Pete Wisdom; Brian Braddock should not be allowed to dress himself; Excalibur invades Black Air; and Onslaught continues to lurk.
X-PLAINED:
Some countries Magneto has invaded
Excalibur #96-99
Black Air (more) (again)
The London branch of the Hellfire Club
Nightcrawler’s new look
Meggan’s new look
The return of Alistaire Stuart
How not to dress for the Hellfire Club
The Shadow Cabinet (a little)
Hacking
Agent Scratch
Avengers vs. Avengers
Addiction recovery
Accreditation of the Xavier School
Developing a library X-collection
NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk!
NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor’s increasingly low recruitment standards!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
