Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Asteroid M

As Mentioned in Episode 477 – Ages of Apocalypse

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Jean Grey sums up this podcast. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
No smoking in the Skull Cave. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“Was this outfit a mistake? I’m worried this outfit was a mistake.” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“This outfit was definitely not a mistake, sugah.” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
To be fair, not her worst costume. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Remember this for the next four chapters! ‘Cause the writers won’t. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Don’t bring a sword to a gun- and/or Psimitar-fight. (Cable #77)
We learned that a horse helmet is called a chanfron, sometimes spelled shaffron, and that Magneto’s horse has the greatest one of all time. (Cable #77)
The literal power behind the throne. (Cable #77)
*cries in alternate timeline* (Cable #77)
We never get sick of that coloring technique. (Cable #77)
*record scratch* “You’re probably wondering how I got here…” (Wolverine #148)
“Logan, you know perfectly well that skeletons can’t drink, and even asking me is offensive and hurtful.” (Wolverine #148)
Is this issue good? That’s the wrong question. Is this issue fun? Absolutely. (Wolverine #148)
Nate Grey as Onslaught… Could this get any more 90s? (Wolverine #148)
I mean, might be an upgrade at this point. (See also: One World Under Doom, on sale now.) (Wolverine #148)
One of a very large number of excellent Phoenix costume color combinations. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
What’s Siphon’s deal? No one knows! (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Don’t think of it as losing a costume so much as gaining a robo-pterodactyl. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Hey, it’s Excalibur! Kinda! (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Know why there isn’t sound in space? Because Banshee lost his voice. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
The one we’ve been waiting for! (Uncanny X-Men #380)
That ol’ Alan Davis alchemy. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
I want to read a whole comic about them! (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Utterly charming. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
The Brotherhood of 2099! Between Magneto and Polaris, we have complete shoulder fur-coverage. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
“Everyone, blast your thing at the thing!” (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Comic book structure as comic book storytelling. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
NEXT TIME: All the mutants lose their powers!

477 – Ages of Apocalypse

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In which reality shatters; Ghost Rider wants friends; Jay’s toddler weighs in on the X-Men; the Phoenix costume is pretty much perfect; Caliban puts all his resources into an epic mount; and the future is so bright you’re gonna need shades.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Triune Understanding
  • Ages of Apocalypse
  • Uncanny X-Men #378
  • Cable #77
  • Wolverine #148
  • X-Men Unlimited #26
  • X-Men #98
  • Earth-23378
  • Things you can leave to people in a will
  • The Silver Age, but different
  • Apocaclops
  • Aliya Dayspring
  • Chronological inconsistencies
  • Earth-2841
  • The Harpy (Betty Ross)
  • A very different Fantastic Four
  • Earth-32000
  • Siphon
  • The moon
  • Zackat (Wolverine) (long story)
  • Erik the Red (more) (again)
  • The Ladies Mastermind
  • Cadre K
  • Earth-32098
  • X-World
  • The prettiest X-Man
  • The moon’s mutant power

NEXT EPISODE: Powerless!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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454 – X-Men ’97, Part 2

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SPOILER WARNING: ALL OF THEM, NONSTOP

In which Barry Windsor-Smith is too sexy for television; we know what happens when unstable molecules get struck by lightning; X-Men gets political and does it spectacularly; this Captain America would not sew the cape; Magneto continues to throw things into space; and they kissed and we missed it.

X-PLAINED:

  • Fabian Cortez’s name
  • X-Men ’97 episodes 6-10
  • Lifedeath I & II: a surprising adaptation
  • Varying levels of going in blind
  • A somewhat different and possibly better Forge
  • The Adversary vs. the Owl Queen
  • Stormiest and least-Stormy costumes
  • Professor Charles Xavier, Official Space Boyfriend
  • Colonialism vs. Identity
  • Delayed catharsis
  • The narrative power of altered opening credits
  • What makes allyship effective (and not)
  • Justified mutant anger
  • The worst version of Nina DaCosta
  • What makes Prime Sentinels scary
  • Summers family feels
  • The best damned fight scenes out there
  • Bastion, robo-avatar of conservative white patriarchy
  • Simultaneous crossovers
  • A psychic gay bar
  • A last boss arena
  • Acolyte equivalencies
  • Phoenix Ex Machina
  • Crying
  • Whether Magneto was right
  • Apoca-futures and Apoca-pasts
  • A bulletin board and our hopes for its contents
  • Soft Serve
  • Kitty Pryde’s coffee shop AU
  • X-Men ’97 as the perfect gateway

NEXT EPISODE: Skrulls!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

No visual companion this week!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 218 – Careful What You Lick

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
They are very excited to be here. (Uncanny X-Men #298)
This is exactly how we dress to watch TV, too. (Uncanny X-Men #298)
Ugh, THESE jerks. (Uncanny X-Men #298)
I mean, they were living there anyway, and it’s probably just as well that you saved them from being murdered, but you do you. (Uncanny X-Men #298)
Forge, you have never been reassuring in your life. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
Somewhere, a damp Magneto is skittering around waiting for his new carapace to harden. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
While I get that Warren’s intentions are probably good here, breaking into schools and holding the children while they sleep is generally frowned upon by LITERALLY EVERYONE. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
Look at him evade like a pro. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
BECAUSE WE WERE TOO MENNY (Uncanny X-Men #299)
Hank McCoy for President. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
I wish they just lied continually to Bishop about the modern world. (Uncanny X-Men #299)
Look at all those Xs! (Uncanny X-Men #300)
Forge, settle down, buddy. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
Iceman speaks for us all, here. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
PROFESSOR XAVIER IS KIND OF CREEPY. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
A good hug. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
And that’s why you always leave a note! Or don’t murder Magneto! One of those, probably! (Uncanny X-Men #300)
These villains are not wildly memorable. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
A rematch that’s been a long time coming. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
Even ’90s Cyclops has his moments. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
There’s the mutant metaphor, and then there’s the Jean Grey metaphor, which is related but not identical. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
“Magnets… I’ve had a few…” (Uncanny X-Men #300)
GLOWER. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
And then nobody was ever happy again. (Uncanny X-Men #300)
NEXT EPISODE: The Emma Frost Appreciation Society (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, et. al.)

LINKS & FURTHER NONSENSE:

 

218 – Careful What You Lick

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which X-Cutioner’s Song may be over, but its repercussions continue; Uncanny X-Men hits a major milestone; superhero comics are and always have been political; Bishop learns to banter; the X-Men gain an unlikely ally; and Magneto remains exceptionally difficult to kill.

X-PLAINED:

  • Jay & Miles at VVCBF
  • Uncanny X-Men #298-300
  • The Acolytes (more) (again)
  • The Upstarts (more) (again)
  • Several important lessons
  • A very fancy room
  • A very fancy brain
  • The unpleasant fate of Sharon Friedlander
  • The all-new, all-different Acolytes
  • Carmella Unuscione
  • The return of one of our favorite antagonists
  • A sick burn
  • The fate of Asteroid M
  • Molting
  • A debate
  • Graydon Creed (more) (again)
  • The tentative redemption of Robert Kelly
  • How to lose a debate with Joe Biden
  • A large number of prescient political references
  • Friends of Humanity
  • How to engage with a fascist in a televised debate
  • Noah DuBois
  • Fatale
  • A generic rural mob
  • Milan
  • A narratively convenient superpower
  • Amelia Voght
  • Seamus Mellencamp
  • Neophyte
  • The gospel of Magneto
  • A joyous reunion
  • The helmet that wouldn’t die
  • Ponytail ethics
  • Timelust
  • Several accents
  • The current state of Rogue’s powers

NEXT EPISODE: All Emma All Episode (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, and more)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 161 – Do You Even Howl, Bro?

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
FlameCon Saturday: ABD Squad! (Yes, Tea’s shirt says what you think it does. Yes, Jay’s hands light up. Yes, we think we’re funny.)
FlameCon Party: Billy and Teddy from Young Avengers #15
FlameCon Sunday: Mod Silver Age Emma and Scott.
Excalibur #32
Not unprecedented, until you realize that the whole thing is a fantasy Margaret Thatcher is having in therapy. (Excalibur #32)
YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?! (Excalibur #32)
Don’t mess with Kitty’s crushes. She’ll cut you. (Excalibur #32)
That is PERFECTLY RESPECTABLE penmanship, thank you very much. (Excalibur #32)
Welcome to St. Subtext’s School for Young Ladies. (Excalibur #32)
(Excalibur #33)
“Also, I’m a superhero.” (Excalibur #33)
(Excalibur #34)
“But you can call me… MR. RAD!” (Excalibur #34)
Let the hijinks commence! (Excalibur #34)
Well, that could’a gone worse. (Excalibur #34)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #34)
Seriously, if I had a dollar for every time I’d woken up like this… (Excalibur #32)
TOO SOON, MESMERO. (Excalibur #33)
Do those abs go all the way… wait, no, that doesn’t even make sense. (Excalibur #33)
But if he can hypnotize her just by making eye contact, why bother doing this? Just to mess with her for fun? Total dick move.(Excalibur #33)
[Ron Howard voice]: There were mistakes. (Excalibur #33)
Oh, great. These assholes, again. (Excalibur #34)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE! (Excalibur #34)
GOOD JOB, EVERYBODY! (Excalibur #34)
Trust me, they’re delightful together. (Excalibur #35)
Well, that escalated quickly. (Excalibur #35)
Aw, kiddo. (Excalibur #35)
Right. That guy. (Excalibur #35)
“But not the one from Alaska. The indefinite article.” (Excalibur #35)
And they all lived grumpily ever after. (Excalibur #35)
Our hero! (Excalibur #36)
It’s a nuanced issue, okay? (Excalibur #36)
This is why we can’t have nice… uncontrolled nuclear things? (Excalibur #36)
Best fight dialogue? Best fight dialogue. And check out that word-balloon cut! (Excalibur #36)
We certainly did not see that coming. (Excalibur #36)
And it DIDN’T ONCE OCCUR TO YOU that this might end badly? (Excalibur #36)
I have no idea what the moral of this story is, but it’s sort of heartwarming anyway. (Excalibur #36)
NEXT EPISODE: The angriest naked man!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

161 – Do You Even Howl, Bro?

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we return to Excalibur, and Excalibur returns to form; “Girls’ School from Heck” is way better than we remembered; Jay has strong feelings about penmanship; we examine the semantics of field hockey; the band gets back together; Dai Thomas has no time for your comic-book bullshit; and you should never, ever install a good/evil switch in your technological abominations.

X-PLAINED

  • The first appearances of Colonel Vazhin
  • Perks of home recording
  • FlameCon 2017
  • Jay & Miles at Rose City Comic Con
  • Excalibur #32-36
  • “Girls’ School from Heck!”
  • St. Searle’s School for Young Ladies
  • St. Trinian’s and a large number of references thereto
  • Regional variations in boarding school hijinks
  • Miss Rutherford
  • A poorly staged panel
  • Phoebe Huntsman
  • Kitty Pryde’s penmanship
  • Margaret Thatcher’s weirdly wholesome fantasies
  • The kinda-reformation of Mesmero
  • The end of Chris Claremont’s run on Excalibur
  • Some complicated contradictions related to the ethics of consumption
  • An abduction
  • The ethics of psychic interrogation (kinda)
  • Mariner disambiguation
  • A rescue
  • An unlikely partnership
  • Darkmoor Research Center
  • Dr. Walshe
  • A somewhat convoluted plot
  • Whether the Danger Room could function as a bathroom
  • The physics of Asteroid M

NEXT EPISODE: Weapon X!

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

Special thanks to Gavia Baker-Whitelaw for helping us assemble the St. Searle’s marginalia!

As Mentioned in Episode 94 – WELCOME TO DIE!

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Pryde of the X-Men‘s character designs are pretty damned comics-accurate, if slightly pastel. (I guess Kitty would have gotten her Shadowcat costume later?)
Real talk: if you watch this show on VHS, Spider-Man takes a minute of your time beforehand to tell you how important it is to vote.
Okay, that’s a legitimately cool way of showing how awesome telepathy can be. And a legitimately GI Joe-looking moment.
“Choose your character, Kitty Pryde!”
This image documents Kitty’s single moment of hesitation before she decides that following a bunch of strangers into space is a great plan.
Pryde of the X-Men‘s Storm may actually be her best on-screen portrayal.
“G’day! Let’s get a dingo on the barbie, you wallaby! Foster’s!”
This makes me actually kind of wish Dazzler had been on the team in the early 80s.
The Arcade Game: Heroes!
The Arcade Game: Villains!
It’s… basically a whole lot of this.
Three Living Monoliths for the price of one!
Twelve-year-old Miles was in heaven. Thirty-three-year-old Miles was too.
Our players: Anna Sheffey, Miles Stokes, and Elisabeth Allie!
Next time: The Brood are back, baby.

LINKS:

94 – WELCOME TO DIE! (feat. Elisabeth Allie)

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Miles and Elisabeth X-Plain Pryde of the X-Men; Magneto is somehow even worse at branding than Mystique; the X-Universe is in desperate need of responsible adults; Wolverine hates kids; everybody’s mean to Lockheed; and the Sentinels represent your feelings.

X-PLAINED:

  • Wolverine’s Australian accent
  • Pryde of the X-Men
  • X-Men / Muppet Babies analogues
  • The Brotherhood of Mutant Terrorists
  • How not to comfort scared teenagers
  • The X-Cessible X-Men
  • The Mutant Power Circuit
  • Terrible parenting
  • A MacGuffin
  • A Really Dubious Evil Plot
  • Several Additional MacGuffins
  • THE POWER!
  • One of many reasons to be nice to animals
  • Space
  • The X-Men Arcade Game
  • Ground Kontrol
  • X-Men: Madness in Murderworld
  • The Uncanny X-Men (game)
  • Metaphorical sentinels
  • Mysterious lizards
  • Video game mechanics vs. superhero ethics
  • Pryde of the X-Men vs the ’90s animated series vs. X-Men: Evolution
  • Alternate animated series hooks

NEXT WEEK: The Brood go to a revival meeting

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 32 – Off the Map

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Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints available here through November 30, or contact David Wynne for the original!
Bill Sienkiewicz on Moon Knight.
Rachel’s other convention sketchbooks are all self portraits. Here’s Bill Sienkiewicz’s.
Sienkiewicz’s last stint on an X-book before New Mutants #18 was Uncanny X-Men #159.
The first page of Sienkiewicz’s run. (New Mutants #18)
The death of Charles Xavier of Earth-811. (New Mutants #18)
The New Mutants in the Danger Room. (New Mutants #18)
LOOK. AT. THIS. PERFECT. PAGE. LAYOUT. LOOK. AT. THIS. PERFECT. SPACE. TEENAGER. (New Mutants #18)
The first full reveal of the Demon Bear. (New Mutants #18)
Gradually, across the Demon Bear Saga, the strangeness bleeds out from the panels and into the design elements. The corner square of New Mutants #18 was a Bob McLeod team portrait. This is the corner square from New Mutants #19.
The same thing is happening on the credits pages–in this case, the title, but just wait ’til you get to next issue… (New Mutants #19)
Tom Corsi and Sharon Friedlander are both charming and in serious trouble. (New Mutants #19)
Those sound effects. Those colors. That layout. (New Mutants #19)
The Demon Bear is less a creature than a space: looming, protean, with very little detail save for its eyes, teeth, and claws. (New Mutants #19)
Illyana’s soul armor makes its first appearance. (New Mutants #19)
And then that happened. (New Mutants #19)
The cover of New Mutants #20. We have no idea what’s going on in the corner square.
It’s worth remembering, as you flip through these, that you’re watching the definition and scope of superhero comics change and stretch. We are–literally and figuratively–off the map. (New Mutants #20)
Map detail. (New Mutants #20)
Later in the same issue. (New Mutants #20)
And finally. (New Mutants #20)
Sienkiewicz’s art gets a lot of attention, but Glynis Wein’s colors are absolutely critical to what the Demon Bear Saga accomplishes visually. (New Mutants #20)
Illyana’s soul armor spreads. (New Mutants #20)
Corsi and Friedlander, in their demon forms. (New Mutants #20)
The Demon Bear breaks down. (New Mutants #20)
Whoa. (New Mutants #20)
New Mutants: generally pretty okay with race and culture issues, but when it fails, it fails HARD. (New Mutants #20)
“Also, I recently leveled up and learned Cure Moderate Wounds.” (New Mutants #20)
One of the best covers of all time. (New Mutants #21)
Actually, let’s take a moment to look at that without the design elements, too, because it’s just that gorgeous. (New Mutants #21)
The “don’t let the normal kids see” joke kinda never gets old. (New Mutants #21)
Binary’s hair, tho. (New Mutants #19)
In case you were wondering, this is why Lee Forrester ends up finding Magneto in the middle of an ocean in Uncanny X-Men #187. (New Mutants #21)
TEENAGERS. (New Mutants #21)
Scariest makeover ever. (New Mutants #21)
YAY FOR ROCKY & BULLWINKLE REFERENCES! (New Mutants #21)
Warlock wakes up. (New Mutants #21)
It’s theoretically possible to imagine Warlock designed by an artist other than Bill Sienkiewicz, but why would you ever want to? (New Mutants #21)
Can we take a moment to acknowledge the self-restraint we are demonstrating by not just filling this entire gallery with pictures of Warlock? (New Mutants #21)
Warlock trying to make friends with inanimate objects is the gift that keeps on giving. (New Mutants #21)
Doug Ramsey X-plains proportionate response. (New Mutants #21)
“Can we keep him?” (New Mutants #21)
Next Week: Crossovers!

Special thanks to Andrew Vestal for help assembling the images for this post.