Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: angel

As Mentioned in Episode 300 – Götterdämmerung

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Trust us–it looks better on foil. (X-Men: Omega)
Those skulls can’t be stable. (X-Men: Omega)
The gang’s mostly here! (X-Men: Omega)
[Cries in Dark Phoenix Saga] (X-Men: Omega)
Truly, he has been preparing for this moment for his entire life.
It’s cute how Nate assumes that it’s possible to talk Magneto out of fighting anybody, ever. (X-Men: Omega)
I’d like to imagine that the M’Kraan crystal made the conscious choice not to show her Onslaught. (X-Men: Omega)
YES! (X-Men: Omega)
Just, um, imagine that he’s holding a gun and also using his powers out of… enthusiasm? For the gun? I guess? (X-Men: Omega)
“Wait, are you the angry Claremontean narrator?!” (X-Men: Omega)
It’s okay. He’ll be back in about 14 years. (X-Men: Omega)
Nobody expects an ongoing series! (X-Men: Omega)
And that, as they say, is that. (X-Men: Omega)
NEXT EPISODE: Back in the 616!

LINKS & FURTHER EPICS:

300 – Götterdämmerung

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the Age of Apocalypse comes to an end; Angel briefly lives up to his potential; Bishop was sometimes right; It’s not a climactic ending without an X-Men #137 reference; Colossus breaks our hearts; X-Men: Marvels Snapshot will be out in September; and somehow we have made 300 of these things.

X-PLAINED:

  • Beast vs. Dark Beast
  • X-Men: Omega
  • The entirety of the (first) Age of Apocalypse
  • Potpourri vs. incense
  • Dramatic hair
  • Many, many errors
  • Unforeseen consequences
  • A long-anticipated team-up
  • Many deaths
  • Art as artifact
  • Narration that has haunted Jay for 20 years
  • One of the more persistent deaths of David Haller
  • Blast Attack
  • The end of a world
  • Refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Our favorite X-milestone issues
  • Theoretical teams
  • Orphans
  • When X-Men: Marvels Snapshot is actually coming out
  • Our favorite show bits
  • How Jay’s chickens-in-law are doing

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Prime

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As Mentioned in Episode 296 – Hard Choices

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
“Are you coming too, mysterious hooded stranger? My sister, Carmen Sandiego, would love to have you along!” (Amazing X-Men #1)
Danger Room cold open, Earth-295-style! (Amazing X-Men #1)
“Just a few more hours and a few dozen more cigarettes until Tom Waits karaoke night!” (Amazing X-Men #1)
“For further details, my X-Men, you must buy every other X-comic on the stands. Excelsior!” (Amazing X-Men #1)
As the famous thinker Parappa the Rapper once so wisely said: you gotta believe. (Amazing X-Men #1)
Earth-295 Sentinels may be lacking in toboggan hats and robot one-piece swimsuits, but they’re still pretty impressive. (Amazing X-Men #1)
Half unspooled VHS tape, half Slinky, all nuisance. (Amazing X-Men #2)
“Go easy on ’em, X-Men – they remembered to use our logo font, and that was very considerate of them.” (Amazing X-Men #2)
Banshee’s facial expression speaks for us all. (Amazing X-Men #2)
Okay, that’s legit terrifying. (Amazing X-Men #2)
Quicksilver? More like FRIPsilver! (Amazing X-Men #2)
If the title wasn’t already taken, Magneto’s autobiography would be called The Brood Saga. (Amazing X-Men #3)
It takes a true villain to make “being stretchy” an intimidating superpower. (Amazing X-Men #3)
Mary Poppins: The Snyder Cut. (Amazing X-Men #3)
Shaking Angel down for information is an X-Men rite of passage. (Amazing X-Men #3)
Open wide and say “flashback”! (Amazing X-Men #3)
you guys I think I’m in the wrong church (Amazing X-Men #4)
This may be bad, but at least he doesn’t have to die of a mutant-targeting virus twice in the Age of Apocalypse the way he does in Earth-616… (Amazing X-Men #4)
Generation Next – ripping our hearts out even when it’s someone else’s comic! (Amazing X-Men #4)
I know you’re mad at Gambit, Rogue, but did you really have to punch his legs off? (Amazing X-Men #4)
Aww, damn – he was just one week away from retirement! (Amazing X-Men #4)
*raises lighter* (Amazing X-Men #4)
NEXT EPISODE: This guy.

296 – Hard Choices

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Magneto doesn’t really do work/live divide; Amazing X-Men is a bit of a misnomer; Exodus is the lawful evil to Fabian Cortez’s chaotic evil; smoking is bad for you; moisture molecular inversion is fairly definitely not a real thing; Earth-295 Quicksilver and Earth-616 Cyclops would probably get along; OSHA would probably like a word with the Madrii; Gambit had ONE JOB; and there are no superheroes in the Age of Apocalypse.

X-PLAINED:

  • An unlikely team-up
  • Relative amazingness
  • Amazing X-Men #1-5
  • Color separations
  • Comics credits
  • The Brotherhood of Mutants and/or Chaos
  • The Great Human Airlift
  • Exodus (more) (again)
  • Best Quicksilver (Earth-295)
  • Abyss
  • A dubiously aerodynamic cape
  • One last job
  • Several points of semantic distinction
  • Lone Nanny & Cub
  • The most punchable man on Earth-295
  • A difficult choice
  • What it means to be X-Men
  • Dick Valentine
  • Jamie Madrox (Earth-295)
  • A world without superheroes
  • Universe numbering

NEXT EPISODE: X-Man!

CORRECTION: The line about fence-straddling that Jay attributed to Wonder Woman was in fact spoken by Hawkgirl.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This June, we’ll be donating all of the profits to Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 294 – The Infernal Gallop

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Man, I love this cover. (X-Calibre #1)
Cain Marko, man of peace. (X-Calibre #1)
Welcome to Avalon. (X-Calibre #1)
That is an EXCELLENT point. (X-Calibre #1)
I don’t remember Thunderbird having that many muscles or, y’know, being white. (X-Calibre #1)
“Sure thing! That’s BLAMM with two Ms?” (X-Calibre #2)
Aw, buddy. (X-Calibre #2)
But shouldn’t that be Rusty Collins’s icon? (X-Calibre #2)
…well, shit. (X-Calibre #2)
Almost our Kurt, and very much not our Kurt. (X-Calibre #2)
OH HELL YEAH (X-Calibre #3)
TFW Magneto forces you to visit your One Big Ex’s intentional community. (X-Calibre #3)
They have fun. (That is a lie. They do not have fun.) (X-Calibre #3)
Oh, come on. (X-Calibre #3)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE (X-Calibre #4)
Not AGAIN. (X-Calibre #4)
Welcome to the Age of Apocalypse!
NEXT EPISODE: these goofs, in space

LINKS & FURTHER ALLUSIONS

294 – The Infernal Gallop

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which a whole lot of things burn; Nightcrawler gets gritty; it’s hard to be Dead Man Wade; Apocalypse’s IT department has some explaining to do; Mystique is the most mom of all moms; Doug Ramsey dies (again); and Jay will fight anyone who says comics can’t be “real” literature.

X-PLAINED:

  • Damask
  • X-Calibre #1-4
  • Switchback
  • Cain Marko of Earth-295
  • Avalon
  • Destiny of Earth-295
  • Nightcrawler of Earth-295
  • Ghost Dance (actual)
  • Ghost Dance (fictional)
  • John Proudstar of Earth-295
  • The Infernal Gallop vs. the Infernal Galop
  • Moonstar of Earth-295
  • Dead Man Wade
  • The Pale Riders
  • Videoconferencing software of Earth-295
  • The Excalibur
  • Walter Newell
  • Callisto of Earth-295
  • A lot of murders
  • A really dark historical precedent
  • Parenthood
  • Death by existential crisis
  • The worst plan
  • Variations on the death of Doug Ramsey
  • Geography of the Age of Apocalypse
  • The rest of the Marvel books during the Age of Apocalypse
  • Jay vs. Western canon

NEXT EPISODE: Gambit and the X-Ternals

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 292 – Weekend at Sinister’s

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
It still really, really looks like the cover of a Star Trek novel to me. (Factor X #1)
Wow, Alex, you’re the worst. Second-worst, after Gabriel, but he doesn’t exist in this universe; so, yeah, you’re the worst. (Factor X #1)
Meanwhile, in Sinister’s secret hideout IN THE HEAD OF THE BIG APOCALYPSE STATUE… (Factor X #1)
Damnit, Sam! You’re better than this! (Factor X #1)
The Bedlam Brothers are way too wholesome to be working for Apocalypse. (Factor X #1)
HOLY SHIT SOMEONE REMEMBERS MELTDOWN (Factor X #1)
That costume. =( (Factor X #2)
See, this is why you’re never going to be Sinister’s favorite. This, and your DNA. (Factor X #2)
Every time, Alex. Every time. (Factor X #2)
If only he hadn’t learned dramatic reveals so well from Sinister, he might never have been found out. (Factor X #2)
It’s like the Silver Age, but different. (Factor X #3)
Ew, but also kind of cool. (Factor X #3)
Aw, Rahne. (Factor X #3)
‘Kay. (Factor X #3)
In Scott’s dubious defense, that’s also just a really poorly thought-out test. (Factor X #3)
Damnit, why’d you have to go and pull on my X-Men #137 heartstrings? (Factor X #3)
This will definitely end well. (Factor X #4)
In case you were wondering whether Alex is still horrible this issue: yes. (Factor X #4)
I KNEW IT! I KNEW THEY WERE TOO GOOD FOR THIS LIFE! (Factor X #4)
DON’T TALK TO ME OR MY BAR EVER AGAIN (Factor X #4)
If only they’d gotten to eat him. (Factor X #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Children are our future!

LINKS & FURTHER VIRTUES

 

292 – Weekend at Sinister’s

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which it is probably not actually possible to be too nasty for Earth-295; Sinister is on nobody’s side but his own; Vulcan is still the worst Summers in the multiverse; the Bedlam Brothers are too delightful for the EMF; Heaven is just straight-up Rick’s Bar now; Polaris of Earth-295 is the saddest Polaris; Scott Summers and Jean Grey make a good team in most universes; and the metaphors of 1995 read very differently in 2020.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nathaniel Essex of Earth-1610
  • A regrettable tattoo
  • #Creators4Comics
  • Scott Summers (Cyclops) of Earth-295
  • Alex Summers (Havok) of Earth-295
  • Factor X #1-4
  • Working for the Man
  • Costume design as narrative
  • The EMF (Elite Mutant Force)
  • Northstar and Aurora of Earth-295
  • Sam and Elizabeth Guthrie (Cannonball and Amazon) of Earth-295
  • Jesse and Terrence Aaronson (Bedlam Brothers) of Earth-295
  • Heaven (the bar)
  • Scarlett McKenzie of Earth-295
  • Someone who is not Magneto
  • The Brain Trust
  • Lorna Dane (Polaris) of Earth-295
  • An obscene monument
  • Innuendo of several sorts
  • That time Jean Grey got captured
  • Resistance of various sorts
  • Poetic almost-kinda justice
  • One more fallen angel
  • Villains of the Age of Apocalypse

NEXT EPISODE: Generation Next!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 289 – Unsolved Mysteries

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
A ToS Trek novel, specifically, I think. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
This statue sucks. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
Sinister is a terrible parent. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
Okay, but why are the guys they’re fighting wearing bondage harnesses? (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
We were so baffled by the abs that we did not consider that they had been dressing him in skintight jeans and pirate boots for five years. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
Robbie flippin’ Robertson: a badass in any universe. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
“Is it me, or do these briefings get weirder every time?” (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
It would be more depressing when Sinister told him he was the worse brother, though. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
These assholes work for a genocidal nightmare regime and yet call a graveyard “the ghost lands.” (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
A familiar story, except where it’s not. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
OH, SHIT. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
If you didn’t know Corsair was doomed before, Havok’s last line definitely clinches it. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
There’s probably a Gatecrasher joke to be found somewhere, but honestly, after this week, I’m fresh out. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
Still not the most awkward conversation they’ve had in a comic, for what it’s worth. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines)
AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT! (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
Yeah, Death, you’re not gonna impress Cyclops with that. He was raised by Sinister; he’s effectively immune to Extra. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
Sweatertown: Population, Blink. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
Aw, Ship. =( (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
He really is. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
I bet when people tell AoA Nightcrawler “Your Mom” jokes, he just kinda sighs and acknowledges that they’re probably right. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
BLACKAGAR BOLTAGON YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
Look, I’m just saying: it’s no telling Dracula to follow his heart. (Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light)
NEXT EPISODE: Astonishing X-Men

LINKS & FURTHER CATASTROPHES:

289 – Unsolved Mysteries

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which this episode is way more topical than it was when we recorded it; Apocalypse makes a terrible Statue of Liberty; there are no reliable narrators; Robbie Robertson and Carmen Sandiego are your new OTP; Emplate is creepy in any universe; lawful evil is still evil; and partial universe reboots come with some fairly silly problems.

X-PLAINED:

  • Awkward intersections of fiction and reality
  • Pandemic (Dr. Richard Palance)
  • Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines
  • Tales from the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light
  • Brooding in multiple ways at once.
  • Corsair (Christopher Summers) (Earth-295)
  • Reconciling cross-universe timelines
  • The Shi’ar (Earth-295)
  • Comparative Summers Backstory
  • Robbie Robertson (Earth-295)
  • Northstar and Aurora (Earth-295)
  • Emplate and the Monets (Earth-295)
  • The Bedlam Brothers (Earth-295)
  • Brood problems
  • The most awkward Summers family reunion to date
  • The Absorbing Man (Earth-295)
  • Diablo (Earth-295)
  • Senator Robert Kelly (Earth-295)
  • The fall of the Guthrie family
  • An early era of Magneto’s X-Men
  • A trip to the moon
  • Death (Maximus Boltagon)
  • Whether the Beyonder of Earth-295 knows how to poop
  • Listening to this podcast with kids

NEXT EPISODE: Astonishing X-Men!

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Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!