Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (X-Men #83)
PHWOOOOOSH PKOOOM YAAIIIHEEE SWOOOOOOOOOSSS (X-Men #83)
‘Sup, demonic sperm? (X-Men #83)
From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)
What if Pinocchio but evil Colossus-bot? (X-Men #83)
The other Cerebr(o/ite) design. (X-Men #83)
Design by David Cronenberg? (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (Again again again!) (Uncanny X-Men #364)
The best version of Post. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Wolverine: vigilante relationship counselor and motivational speaker. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Eeeuuuugghhh (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Charles Xavier: the world’s most ripped telepath. (X-Men #84)
Cerebro Prime has almost completed its Pokédex! (X-Men #84)
Colossus practices his witty banter. (X-Men #84)
Oil and razor blades and cotton candy and (X-Men #84)
The Xavier Protocols are gorier than expected. (X-Men #84)
Imagine all the people (X-Men #84)
Back home and back to the status quo. (X-Men #84)
NEXT TIME: Dracula.

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440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)

In which the Hunt for Xavier remains vaguely disappointing; Gambit is good with kids; nanomachines are the new unstable molecules; Marrow is a walking armory; and we recommend comics for babies.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Hunt for Xavier, Part 2
  • Babies and/or ghosts
  • Chekhov’s repowering
  • X-Men #83-84
  • Uncanny X-Men #364
  • Cerebro / Cerebro Prime
  • Cerebrite Alpha
  • Cerebrite Beta
  • X-Men serial numbers
  • What Gambit’s friends call him
  • How Miles stopped worrying and learned to love Gambit
  • Evil robot sperm
  • Mary Purcell
  • Multiple-monitor displays
  • A computer with a computer
  • AI
  • The Florida facility
  • Post
  • Pile-Driver X
  • A glimpse into the butt of all humanity
  • Comics for babies
  • Name-based powers

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X has Dracula problems!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 439 – Fishfic

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A very loud search party. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Stooges in shorts. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
The Continuing Saga of Gambit & the Gassy Lady. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Storm and Marrow have their best conversations while fucking up automobiles. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
*Driving rock intro* (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Gassy ladies, fire ladies… It hard to be Gambit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
This version of Cerebro doesn’t require telepathy to use, but it does require a cute outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
In medias swamp-rat. (X-Men #82)
He has agreed to take me / To the ice hotel from the magazine (X-Men #82)
Whoa indeed, Keanu. (X-Men #82)
You’ve all had that dream too, right? (X-Men #82)
Clockwise from top-left: blood, black bile, phlegm, yellow bile. (X-Men #82)
I have no idea what kind of metal band Cerebro fronts, but I would listen to them. (X-Men #82)
I miss Toad’s too-many-Liefeldian-teeth look, but this one’s pretty great. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Maybe the post-Fall era of X-Men will finally explain what Wolverine smelled. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Cerebro’s other outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
What’s… what’s happening here?! (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Shoulda just complimented her classic fedora-‘n’-trenchcoat look. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Meanwhile, in the margins of a Wolverine one-shot… (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Somewhat new, somewhat different. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
NEXT TIME: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

439 – Fishfic

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In which we reach the beginning of an end; Jay totally forgot Gambit was there; we’re all living in the Mary Purcelliverse; the X-Men split the party; and we explore The Bay Area’s Bohemian Hotbed of Student Anarchy.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mary Purcell (sort of)
  • The re-defaulting of the X-Men
  • Uncanny X-Men #362-323
  • X-Men #82
  • Nebraska
  • Pyro (Saint John Allerdyce) and his endless illness
  • Legacy Virus variations
  • Going home again
  • Running back and forth in quarries
  • Marrow, who’s come a long way
  • The two forms of fire: skeleton monsters and sexy ladies
  • Cerebro (the evil one)
  • San Francisco and Tajikinistan
  • Asphalt ball pits
  • A topsy-turvy nonsensical impossible hell
  • Nina the Mannite
  • Desire, love, loss, and fear
  • Skulls and spines
  • The New (New) Brotherhood of Mutants
  • Cerebrites Alpha and Beta
  • A lost, smelly fish
  • Ambiguous art
  • Blood, sweat, and fears
  • Which mutants would cause the most chaos at holiday gatherings
  • Hopes for post-Fall society

NEXT EPISODE: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 438 – The Man of Harsh Business

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The confident sneer of a man with a shillelagh. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Wolverine, vigilante relationship counselor. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
A Juggernaut diminished. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Dude’s got his flaws, but Gambit really knows how to make an entrance! (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Shadowcat and Gambit have met before, but never so close to whatever’s in Juggernaut’s pants. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
“I especially don’t want anyone to see my impressive collection of Jonathan Taylor Thomas calendars!” (Uncanny X-Men #361)
The X-Men have their best conversations while fighting ninjas or ninja equivalents. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Jack of Queen of Hearts Death! (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Comedy gold. (X-Men #81)
I’ve missed this dynamic. (X-Men #81)
It’s so easy to follow the motion of this fight even through still images… Pay attention, every modern action director! (X-Men #81)
The three words every woman longs to hear: “I hurrk hkk”. (X-Men #81)
Hairy hugs! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
THE MAN OF HARSH BUSINESS (Wolverine: Black Rio)
My only complaint with this panel is that the sound effect should actually be SHAAARK (Wolverine: Black Rio)
Logan knows how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
Logan continues to know how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
I have questions. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
To this, we can only say: huh. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
“Sorry I didn’t get here sooner. This thing has, like, a lot of zippers.” (Wolverine: Black Rio)
The road goes Wolver on and on. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
NEXT EPISODE: The Hunt for Xavier begins!

438 – The Man of Harsh Business

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In which Gambit knows how to make an entrance; Rogue and Gambit only have relationship conversations during superhero fights; Wolverine fights a shark; and we have opinions on how to handle certain aspects of backstory.

X-PLAINED:

  • One way to take over Madripoor
  • Uncanny X-Men #361
  • X-Men #81
  • Wolverine: Black Rio
  • The X-Men’s rapid slide back to the status quo
  • Steve Comicraft
  • The fork of loneliness
  • Cyttorak (again)
  • Black Tom Cassidy (again)
  • Peacocks
  • Sarasota Jungle Gardens
  • What’s sticking out of Juggernaut’s pants
  • Favorite versions of the Danger Room
  • Floriography
  • Kali (kind of)
  • Mary Purcell (a bit)
  • Rio Carnival
  • An outfit
  • Detective Antonio Vargas and his mustache
  • Saint Cyrus Leviticus
  • Ezra
  • Comparing mutant and Inhuman culture
  • Demonic homage

NEXT EPISODE: The Hunt for Xavier begins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 437 – Dismember the Titans

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“Hot Topic Rennfaire” was a somewhat controversial choice for X-Force’s prom theme. (X-Force #85)
I’m impressed Pandemonia is so well put-together after 600 years in captivity! I was wearing pajama pants by day three of the pandemic. (X-Force #85)
“I’ll never forget that day… Rusty was inexplicably blonde, I was in a costume I wouldn’t have for months, and all was right in the world.” (X-Force #85)
You can tell Sam and Dani are in great shape: they’re having a conversation about feelings and continuity during a run while most of us couldn’t manage more than “*wheeze* *cough*” (X-Force #85)
“This place seems different! Did somebody replace a lamp or something?” (X-Force #85)
…How long have they been posing like that? (X-Force #85)
Nice fight scene, Angel Unzueta! (X-Force #85)
As distinct from prolific video game voice actress Jennifer Hale! (X-Force #85)
Say it, Dani! Focused totality… you know the next part… (X-Force #85)
“We’re here to cast glamours and rock out for Satan, and we’re all out of glamours!” (X-Force #85)
Pictured: Hades in disguise, Hades’s girlfriend, and Hades’s surprisingly detailed and colorful statue of Hades. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
It’s no Larry Stroman crowd scene, but still, pretty great! (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
Cannonball wants to axe Meltdown what she was thinking. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
“Well, at least it’s not a, you know.” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
To Meltdown’s credit, that lady does seem like she’s about to take a bite out of Cannonball. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
“Why were we the members of this team? Well, we happened to all be free on a Tuesday.” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
Magic! Flirtation! Fonts! (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
“Happy tenth high school reunion, everybody!” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
Now THAT’S playing the long game. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
Don’t feel bad, I always mix them up with the Defenders too. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)
NEXT TIME: A very Wolverine Wolverine story.

437 – Dismember the Titans

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“Hot Topic Rennfaire” was a somewhat controversial choice for X-Force’s prom theme. (X-Force #85)

In which the overlap between Rocky Horror and ‘90s X-Force fans is probably pretty significant; Pandemonia has priorities; the warehouse gets an evil, sexy glowup; swears are great; Johnny Blaze’s motorcycle probably shouldn’t still be on fire; and there is no single definitive X-Men experience.

X-PLAINED:

  • Master Pandemonium
  • X-Force #85
  • X-Force/Champions Annual 1998
  • What X-Force has been up to lately
  • The regrettable absence of Doctor Doom
  • Possession
  • Community
  • Cougars (euphemistic)
  • The thrift cycle
  • Rusty Collins on Krakoa
  • Fashion
  • An eons-old accord between the Houses of Chaos and the Lord of Valhalla
  • Jennifer Kale
  • The list
  • Swears
  • A statue of Hades
  • Various appendages sticking out of the earth
  • Hercules
  • The mystic power of sarcasm
  • The greatest fear of a Titan
  • Monet St. Croix vs. the Count of Monte Cristo
  • Good X-books for your fifteen-year-old niece

NEXT EPISODE: Wolverine vs. Vampires (again)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 436 – The Feel-Good Movie of the Summer

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Never go on a commercial flight with Wolverine. (X-Men: Liberators #1)
They have fun. (X-Men: Liberators #1)
The Cockrum line-up! (X-Men: Liberators #2)
IT IS REALLY NOT LIKE THE TREES, KURT. (X-Men: Liberators #2)
Walls are for normies. (X-Men: Liberators #2)
Hi, Nikolas! (X-Men: Liberators #2)
I bet Charles Xavier spends a lot of money on landscaping. (X-Men: Liberators #3)
One way to start a fire. (X-Men: Liberators #3)
Kids love Nightcrawler. (X-Men: Liberators #3)
Nude in the snow: the Logan story. (X-Men: Liberators #4)
Omega Red sure is Omega Red. (X-Men: Liberators #4)
…wow. (X-Men: Liberators #4)
IT’S THE FEEL-GOOD MOVIE OF THE SUMMER! (X-Men: Liberators #4)
Aw. (X-Men: Liberators #4)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force gets possessed!

436 – The Feel-Good Movie of the Summer

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In which Colossus has had a rough time of it; the X-Men are at their best in bar fights; Bronze-age Wolverine was a jerk; Ursa Major deserves more page space; kids dig Nightcrawler; and we imagine an X-Men newspaper comic strip.

X-PLAINED:

  • Notable incidents in Iceman’s romantic history
  • X-Men: Liberators #1-4
  • Nostalgia
  • Friendship
  • A bar fight
  • Province 13
  • General Sergei
  • Several dead deer
  • Gregor and Valeri
  • Nikolas
  • Zener cards
  • Several children
  • Omega Red (more) (again)
  • Ariana
  • Ideal formats
  • Beast vs. Dark Beast
  • A theoretical X-Men newspaper comic

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force gets possessed!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!