Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 381 – If We Told You, We’d Have to Kill You

August 14, 2022 Jay Leave a comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

If Alex Summers had more issues, he’d be a comics shop. (X-Factor #131)

I guess he swallowed the thumb, which makes its lack of repeat appearance less surprising. (X-Factor #131)

The world’s slowest plasma blast. (X-Factor #131)

The real reason for Jamie Madrox’s heel turn. (X-Factor #132)

“And if you don’t like our terms, there’s also a free AOL install!” (X-Factor #132)

Agent Bowser. (X-Factor #133)

The Many Deaths of X-Factor: Sabretooth. (X-Factor #133)

The Many Deaths of X-Factor: Wild Child. (X-Factor #133)

The Many Deaths of X-Factor: Polaris and Shard. (X-Factor #133)

The Many Deaths of X-Factor: Mystique. (X-Factor #133)

The Many Deaths of X-Factor: Forge. (X-Factor #133)

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur vs. Crimson Dawn!

381 – If We Told You, We’d Have to Kill You

August 7, 2022 Jay 6 comments

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In which real life sucks; Havok may or may not be a bad enough dude to rescue mutantkind; X-Factor quits; CD-ROMs were never THAT cool; subtlety is for suckers; Val Cooper hates nothing more than she hates the U.S. government; and Jamie Madrox wants nothing to do with your nonsense.

X-PLAINED:

One way to end a wedding
X-Factor #130-133
Malice (again)
A thumb (and the biting thereof)
Barnes (and her hair)
The relative versatility of plasma
The Brotherhood
A ruse and/or retcon
Lighting design
A CD-ROM
The time Jay wrote some Captain America comics
The last time you’re gonna see these
Trevor Chase (more)
One thing that might’ve inspired Jamie Madrox’s heel turn
The nature of Jamie Madrox’s relative mortality
Brand names
Many faked deaths
Agent Bowser
A very fancy haunted house
X-Factor’s true calling
The X.S.E. (again)
Mutant shifts in adaptations
‘Nuff said

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur vs. Crimson Dawn!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

As Mentioned in Episode 380 – Arbor Day

August 1, 2022 Miles 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Autumnal. (Generation X #23)

I miss the Blue Ridge Mountains. (Generation X #23)

Banshee’s powers may not make any more sense in these panels, but damn if they don’t look cool. (Generation X #23)

Howard, you should know better than to appear in any comic ever. (Generation X #23)

“Clearly! I mean, you’re not a dog, or purple, or… oh.” (Generation X #23)

Just a regular ol’ sleepover. (Generation X #24)

Characterization by way of wardrobe. (Generation X #24)

Young Jubilee and her ol’ Gem Fusion pal. (Generation X #24)

Yep, that seems 100% accurate. (Generation X #24)

Emplate, gothiest crowd-surfer ever (Generation X #24)

Ironically, the turtle itself was telepathic. (Generation X #24)

The readers see the pictures but the girls just hear the words. Emma is a master of selective detail. (Generation X #24)

“No I did not realize! You looked much less evil before this morning! And also less awesome, if I’m being honest!” (Generation X #25)

Black Tom Cassidy, Mark I. (Generation X #25)

Man, kudzu really is invasive. (Generation X #25)

The death of the-Mondo-we-knew. (Generation X #25)

Black Tom Cassidy, Mark II. (Generation X #25)

Gaaahhhhh those creepy finger-needles in Emma’s head (Generation X #25)

Black Tom Cassidy, Mark III. (Generation X #25)

Like a samurai movie! (Generation X #25)

Could be worse, kids – Howard and the moppets ended up someplace way weirder. (Generation X #25)

NEXT TIME: X-Factor quits.

380 – Arbor Day

August 1, 2022 Jay 6 comments

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In which no one wants to be compared to Chris Bachalo; it’s always a holiday for Generation X; you may already be a Guthrie; M is a fascinating mystery; and Black Tom Cassidy (finally) makes his move.

X-PLAINED:

What Black Tom Cassidy is up to these days
Generation X #23-25
Generation X (again)
Seasons
Visual representations of Banshee’s powers
Several holidays
The Blue Ridge Mountains
A slumber party
Emplate (somewhat)
Bad times with Black Tom Cassidy
The apparent death of Emma Frost
What we do and don’t cover when
Leech on Krakoa

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor Quits

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

HAWK TALK – Joy

July 24, 2022 Miles 9 comments

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This would usually be a skip week, but thanks to some generous donors to Equality Florida, Hawk Talk is back! This week’s topic was chosen by Blindseer0.

As Mentioned in Episode 379 – Stardate: Today

July 24, 2022 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

FAO Schwarz, allegedly. (Uncanny X-Men #341)

Gladiator is not great at diplomacy. (Uncanny X-Men #341)

I AM SO WORRIED ABOUT THIS POOR MAN AND HIS HORSE (Uncanny X-Men #341)

New Outfits: Trish (Uncanny X-Men #342)

New Outfits: Bishop and Rogue (Uncanny X-Men #342)

New Outfits: Gambit, Joseph, and Beast (Uncanny X-Men #342)

Well, that’s a new look for the Phalanx. (Uncanny X-Men #343)

One for your reaction files. (Uncanny X-Men #343)

Word balloons on the cover are an underrated gimmick. (Uncanny X-Men #344)

Where babies come from! (Uncanny X-Men #344)

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Black Tom Cassidy!

379 – Stardate: Today

July 17, 2022 Jay 7 comments

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In which what happens in space stays in space; a horse is imperiled; Joseph does some dubious science; Gladiator’s name is absolutely not Gary; everybody gets new costumes; and we learn where babies come from.

X-PLAINED:

Shi’ar taxonomy, sort of
The Shi’ar (again)
The Phalanx (again)
Uncanny X-Men #341-344
A whole bunch of callbacks to X-Men #98
A carriage ride
The Z’noxx chamber (again)
One way to have safer sex
FAO Schwarz
The Shi’ar Imerial Guard (again)
Diplomacy, kind of
Space outfits
Trademarks
Pure Phalanx
Dinosaur Kingdom 2
Where Shi’ar babies come from
Flirting
The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl vs. Isca the Unbeaten
Characters we would happily voice if invited to do so

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Black Tom Cassidy!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

As Mentioned in Episode 378 – The Unstoppable Huggernaut

July 10, 2022 Miles 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

That is a lot of Cain Marko. (Juggernaut #1)

WE’VE GOT SMEK SIGN! WE’VE GOT SMEK SIGN! (Juggernaut #1)

I do not want to be in Juggernaut’s fraternity, please. (Juggernaut #1)

I honestly do not know whether D’Spayre or his chompy demons look cooler. (Juggernaut #1)

They’ve been busy. (Juggernaut #1)

Presenting Black Tom Cassidy’s forked beard and his forked… boots? (Juggernaut #1)

Same outfit as last time, but Spite looks rad as hell in this story. (Juggernaut #1)

Aww shit D’Spayre looks even cooler here (Juggernaut #1)

Even Juggernaut’s skeleton is beefy. (Juggernaut #1)

Jay disapproves of this butt. (Generation X Annual 1997)

“You can’t be Catseye! Your hair is wrong and you’re not talking like Yoda! Aaaaaaand also you’re dead!” (Generation X Annual 1997)

“Thanks for saying my logo right, Jubes.” (Generation X Annual 1997)

Aww, kids. (Generation X Annual 1997)

March 2020 – present (Generation X Annual 1997)

Nothing brings out backstory like a Fear Lord! (Generation X Annual 1997)

Did the power pairings of the current New Mutants run get their start here? Prrrrrobably not. (Generation X Annual 1997)

That’s one biiiiig leprechaun in that executioner’s hood. (Generation X Annual 1997)

When Chamber’s mutant powers first manifested, they destroyed not only his lower jaw and upper chest, but also his swole-ness. (Generation X Annual 1997)

NEXT TIME: Space fashion!

378 – The Unstoppable Huggernaut

July 10, 2022 Jay 12 comments

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In which our favorite(?) fear lord returns; Sirocco Sprawl is an extremely unpleasant fictional town; the Juggernaut is not a subtle man; we really need to get our hands on the Generation X novels; Tarot gets a logo font; and Banshee is menaced by spectral leprechauns.

X-PLAINED

Several Juggernauts
Soap Operas
D’Spayre (again)
D’Spayre vs. Nightmare
Juggernaut #1
Generation X Annual 1997
Magical pants
Juggernaut (Cain Marko) and what he’s been up to lately
Incidental reptiles
Sirocco Sprawl, NM
Marvin T. Rocksalt
A spree of cartoonish destruction
Spite (again)
Black Tom Cassidy (again)
A really cool skeleton
Generation X novels
Several episodes we should probably do someday
A very poorly-drawn butt
The Hellions (more) (again)
One way to put out a fire
Garden Plots with Skeletor
Several nightmare scenarios
Alex Summers’s adoptive family
What would happen if Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau met Cameron Hodge

NEXT EPISODE: Space!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!