Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

464 – The Cigarettes of Damocles

September 29, 2024 Jay 6 comments

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In which X-Force is kind of silly; that really isn’t what “quantum” means; polite and lawful are two entirely different things, and Sam Guthrie is only one of them; Selene vogues; and the Hellfire Club plays the dead girlfriend card.

X-PLAINED:

Blackheart
The Damocles Foundation (more) (again)
Lucas Bartholomew Guthrie
The difference between prisons and jails
X-Force #98-98
Whether Dr. Octopus enjoys the literary stylings of Elmore Leonard
One way to get out of prison
The Glitterbox
An unsuccessful heist
Celestial cigarettes and/or golems
Thomas and/or Tyler Zebulon and/or Zeke Guthrie
Demon Bears as urban pests
Selene, Always Voguing
Gatherers
Various evil scientists
The Sword
Junkyard life
Lenny Delmonico
Psychic rodeos
Nightmare chambers
Bat sex
An offer Sunspot can’t refuse
Hank McCoy’s villain arc
New Mutant superlatives

NEXT EPISODE: Astonishing X-Men!

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As Mentioned in Episode 463 – The Fart Ghost That Walks Like a Manhattan

September 29, 2024 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Well, that can’t be good. (Gambit Annual 1999)

What a silly man. (Gambit Annual 1999)

“Get in the tube, Remy.” (Gambit Annual 1999)

I know we joke about the fart ghost thing, but she literally comes out of his butt. (Gambit Annual 1999)

Dewey is practically the patron saint of the t’ieves guild. (Gambit Annual 1999)

It’s a save point! (Gambit Annual 1999)

ERIK THE RED! (Gambit Annual 1999)

Okay, I know it’s a serious scene, but this panel is absolutely hilarious. (Gambit Annual 1999)

CONCRETE DATE! CONCRETE DATE! (Gambit Annual 1999)

“Demerits for everyone!” (Uncanny X-Men #372)

Oof. (Uncanny X-Men #372)

Professor Xavier is a jerk. (Uncanny X-Men #372)

Ouch. (X-Men #92)

NEXT EPISODE: The return of the Damocles Foundation!

463 – The Fart Ghost That Walks Like a Manhattan

September 22, 2024 Jay 5 comments

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In which Gambit is fundamentally goofy; t’ieves love research; Magneto was ripped; Professor Xavier remains a jerk; Miles attempts to convey something very fundamentally visual in an audio format; Marrow is adorable; the X-Men pretty much disband (again); and a miniseries is the opposite of a vacation.

X-PLAINED:

Where Wolverine went
Gambit Annual 1999
Uncanny X-Men #372
X-Men #92
A lot of backstory
A very cute plastic goose
What Gambit does in his free time
Those weird fluid-filled tubes they put people in all the time for some reason
Gambit’s abs
The fart ghost (Mary Purcell)
Manhattan, Indiana
A very minor continuity error
Fart ghost metaphysics
A very bad idea
A muppetworthy death
Dream’s various ends
X-pajamas
Professional dinosaurs
Thinkers
Theoretical Cyclops-Daredevil team-ups
X-characters recognizable as civilians

NEXT EPISODE: The return of the Damocles Foundation!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 462 – Angst and Continuity

September 15, 2024 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Oh, that can’t be good. (Generation X #55)

Well, shit. (Generation X #55)

Cold, Emma. (Generation X #55)

Ew, but also awesome. (Generation X #56)

FUCK YEAH EMMA FROST (Generation X #56)

Aw. (Generation X #56)

She’s evil, but damn does she have an eye for fashion. (Generation X #56)

Propellor beanie! (Generation X #57)

You really, really can’t. (Generation X #57)

Bobert Drake, straight heterosexual. (Generation X #57)

The queen of the goths! (Generation X #57)

We did not describe Skin’s outfit in the podcast because frankly, words do not do it justice. (Generation X #57)

TBH, this is how most of our school dances ended, too. (Generation X #57)

NEXT EPISODE: The secret origins of Gambit’s fart ghost girlfriend!

462 – Angst and Continuity

September 15, 2024 Jay 2 comments

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In which the 1990s were very long; if you die in the simulation, you die in real life; Adrienne Frost is a bad person with good clothes; we judge the number 57; things just keep happening; and Penance somehow gets even more complicated.

X-PLAINED:

Bevatron
Generation X #55-57
The Hellions and their untimely demise (again)
Uncanny X-Men #281
A continuity conundrum
Many allusions and references
Cognitive dissonance
Dancing between the raindrops of continuity
Resolution
Emma Frost, triumphant
Fashion
Emplate (more) (again)
Propeller beanies
Feelings
Explosions
One way to solve a problem
Whether you should read Dazzler: The Movie
The worst possible power swaps

NEXT EPISODE: The secret origins of Gambit’s fart ghost girlfriend!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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461 – Things to Do in Denver When You’re X-Force

September 1, 2024 Jay 8 comments

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In which Magneto may be right but is also wildly impractical; X-Force goes on a sneaking mission; Magneto isn’t mad, he’s just disappointed; Rictor and Shatterstar return; Strong is not a common surname in the Marvel universe; and being a mutant on TV doesn’t mean you’re one in the comics.

X-PLAINED:

How Jubilee became a vampire
The most X-treme youth of them all
X-Force 94-95
X-Force Annual 1999
Genosha
Butler disambiguation
Clown jobs
A team-up predicated on an awkward breakup
Hammer Town
Delphi
Memory boxes
Several potential continuity error
Names
Genoshan robots
Archie
A hierarchy of potential fates
Vershiagen Industries and/or Vershlagen Industries
V2
Hanrancha
Stronghold
Martin Strong
Freddie
Michelle Balters (Neurotap) (more) (again)
Communication with X-teams
A sudden and depressing resolution
Continuity across media
Why Gambit doesn’t (usually) throw tarot cards

NEXT EPISODE: The Return of the Hellions (kinda)

The visual companion to this episode will be up later this week!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 460 – Setting Sons

September 1, 2024 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

I really enjoy cover copy like this. (Generation X #52)

Synch is better at your powers than you are. (Generation X #52)

Oh, snap! (Generation X #52)

Wait, if it’s just her skin, shouldn’t we be seeing muscles and stuff under it? (Generation X #52)

What happens when you give image inducers to moppets. (Generation X #52)

TFW you just rescued a mercenary in the woods outside your boarding school, and he’s kinda hot. (Generation X #53)

The Rising Sons. (Generation X #53)

This is one of very few panels in which you can see Paladin’s whole costume. (Generation X #54)

Damn, Adrienne. (Generation X #54)

NEXT EPISODE: The return of Rictor and Shatterstar!

X-Discussion: September 2024

September 1, 2024 Miles 14 comments

X-discussion time!

A reminder about our ground rules:

Keep your posts at least tangentially comics-related, please!
If you want to share a link, talk about why you’re sharing it and what you think – this post should be about what you have to say, not just links!
Spoilers are okay, but please mark anything from the last three months like:
***SPOILER***
Miles has been a Skrull this whole time!
No AI-generated content.
Be respectful! We don’t have to agree about everything, but don’t be a jerk!

460 – Setting Sons

August 25, 2024 Jay 4 comments

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In which Synch is better with your powers than you are; Generation X gets some actual training; Artie and Leech are fully feral; everyone gets the hots for Paladin; Zeus has probably fucked a motorcycle at some point; many countries have valleys; and Adrienne Frost is terrible.

X-PLAINED:

Generation X #52-54
Tristan Brawn (more) (again)
Grant Morrison on suspension of disbelief in superhero media
Honor vs. privilege
School dance themes
Artie and Leech’s habitat
Spider-Ham
Ducktor Doom
Role models
What Gaia is probably definitely up to
Paladin
The Rising Sons
Rollerblades
Dragon problems
Power emulation vs. reproduction
Pokémans
Cosplaying Emma Frost with a beard
Diamond Patch
Muir Island vs. Muir Isle

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force goes to Genosha!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 459 – Waiting to X’Hal (feat. Devin Toohey)

August 18, 2024 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

It is a crime that Dial H.U.S.K. didn’t make the cover. (X-Patrol #1)

As letterforms to create the shape of your building go, you could do worse. A lot worse. (X-Patrol #1)

I didn’t know there was a wrong way to stare at a butt, but… Beastling’s doing it. (X-Patrol #1)

Backstory, orange edition: Shatterstarfire! (X-Patrol #1)

Backstory, green edition: Beastling! (X-Patrol #1)

Backstory, yellow edition: Dial H.U.S.K.! (Bonus: Wonder Girl!) (X-Patrol #1)

Backstory, blue edition: Ferro Man! (X-Patrol #1)

Backstory, fuschia edition: Elasti-Girl! (X-Patrol #1)

Shit, now I wish Cable had a beard. And not just that literally-evil goatee from 1993. (X-Patrol #1)

An auspicious start to a first mission. (X-Patrol #1)

That outfit! On that guy! (X-Patrol #1)

Pretty bangin’ fit, I’m not gonna lie. (X-Patrol #1)

Second-rate indeed. That claw-guy doesn’t even have bat ears! (X-Patrol #1)

Mary Marvel Girl! (X-Patrol #1)

Did he murder tiny demon-squirrels just to hold his cape on? (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

Hitch and Neary never disappoint. (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

They must have such excellent dental hygiene practices! (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

Maximalism. (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

X-Patrol Mark II, featuring non-Rockslide and Jan’s muscles. (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

Robot roll-call! (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

I would read any and all of these comics. (Exciting X-Patrol #1)

Stalactites have a C in the middle because they’re on the ceiling, stalagmites have a G in the middle because they’re on the ground, and Brood have an O in the middle because they’ll eat your goddamn face. (Exciting X-Patrol #1)