Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Our New OTP

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David Wynne, you are a gift to the universe. There are not adequate words in any language we know for how happy we are about this picture.

Wynne_Italian_Porno_Batman_and_Bondage_Viking

For those of you unfamiliar with the mustachio’d gentleman standing next to Everyone’s Favorite Bondage Viking(TM) Erik the Red, that’s Italian Porno Batman, from the 1982 film Bathman dal Pianeta Eros, which at this point is best known for its bewilderingly long sequences of the Caped Crusader riding a bicycle around the Italian countryside in full costume.

…No, seriously. (Link is totally work-and-kid-safe.)

 

As Mentioned in Episode 8 – What We Talk About When We Talk About Claremont

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Listen to the podcast here!

In a moment of clarity, Cyclops recognizes that the X-Men’s greatest enemy is, in fact, the guy writing the book. (X-Men #96)
Never change, Sunfire. (X-Men #94)
Check out that sweet Dave Cockrum training montage. (X-Men #94)
Welcome to the X-Men, Thunderbird! Hope you survive the… oh. (X-Men #95)
This panel isn’t all that plot-relevant. We just think Havok’s powers look super cool. (X-Men #97)
“There can’t be TWO bondage vikings running around the Marvel universe!” (X-Men #97)
Professor Xavier’s nightmares are AWESOME. (X-Men #97)
Steven Lang: Stable and upstanding member of society. (X-Men #96)
In the Silver Age, superhero romance was limited to soulful gazes and ongoing sexual harassment. (X-Men #98)
I don’t know why they all look so surprised. (X-Men #98)
Cyclops obliterating a Sentinel: never gets old. (X-Men #98)
As far as we can tell, he swam here. From the middle of the ocean. Dr. Peter Corbeau: Ph.D. Badassitude. (X-Men #98)
Those are actually Sentinels designed to look and act like the original X-Men, because, Steven Lang. Just run with it. (X-Men #99)
Oh, hey, it’s the first Fastball Special! (X-Men #100)
You know how we say Jean Grey is underrated? Jean Grey is freakin’ underrated. (X-Men #100)
Aw. man. This whole scene. (X-Men #100)
The (first) death of Jean Grey. (X-Men #100)
And then… (X-Men #101)
This page still gives us chills. (X-Men #101)
Next week: Leprechauns. We’re not even joking.

Links and further reading:

FanBros

Chris Claremont’s X-Men

Episode 05 – The Retcon That Walks Like a Man (Covering Giant-Size X-Men #1)

8 – What We Talk About When We Talk About Claremont

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In which Chris Claremont defines the X-Universe; Sunfire quits the team (again); Nightcrawler is the best; the narrator is nobody’s friend; Colossus is a good kid; Cyclops has a long series of bad days; everyone is a bondage Viking; Rachel is a space pedant, we meet the Phoenix, and Wolverine is the Batman of Marvel.

X-Plained:

  • Polaris’s kinda-powers
  • Our first crossover event
  • How much we love you
  • Chris Claremont, and why he’s the definitive X-writer
  • Comics In Focus: Chris Claremont’s X-Men
  • Why Nightcrawler is the best point-of-view character
  • The long game
  • Tom Orzechowski’s dimension-folding lettering skills
  • Claremontisms
  • The malicious narrator
  • Count Nefaria
  • Sliding-scale ransom
  • The life, death, and occasional reanimation of Thunderbird
  • Friendship
  • The care and feeding of cairns
  • Erik the Red
  • Quiet moments
  • Sentinels and X-Sentinels
  • Steven Lang
  • The (first) death and return of Jean Grey
  • Accents

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Next week: Leprechauns!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 7 – Cyclops Has a Good Day

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Listen to the podcast here!

Proof that Miles does, in fact, have a Corsair costume.
I’m not sure there’s any scene from X-Men that’s been redrawn as frequently as this one. (Guardians of the Galaxy #12)
Corsair’s first appearance in X-Men #104
Look at these glorious weirdos. LOOK AT THEM. (X-Men #107)
Make good choices, Jean. (X-Men #107)
The best scene in X-Men, ever. (X-Men #114)
Sometimes Scott Summers is not the brightest crayon in the box. (X-Men #114)
Cyclops is the worst at hugs. (Uncanny X-Men #391)
Dude has a point. (Uncanny X-Men #391)
Reports of Corsair’s death have been somewhat exaggerated. (All-New X-Men #23)
Scott has questions. (Guardians of the Galaxy #12)
Aw, kiddo. (Guardians of the Galaxy #12)
Remember when you were sixteen, and everything was super serious, and your not-quite girlfriend got kidnapped by space birds and put on trial for the crimes that her past-future adult self committed by possessed by a cosmic force? (Guardians of the Galaxy #13)
Remember when you were sixteen, and everything was super serious, and also your dad was a space pirate? (Cyclops #1)
Key party in Shi’ar space!. (Cyclops #1)
Hepzibah and Corsair are one of the great unsung romances of the Marvel universe. (Cyclops #1)
Grown-up Cyclops finds out about the new Cyclops ongoing series. (All-New X-Men #26)

Links and Further Reading:

Greg Rucka

A visual introduction to the worst Summers brother

Rachel’s “Cyclops Has a Good Day” sketchbook

Cyclops #1

Lazarus

Veil

Stumptown

Lady Sabre and the Pirates of the Ineffable Aether

7 – Cyclops Has a Good Day

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With guest Greg Rucka!

In which death is a revolving door, we really liked Days of Future Past, space pirates are the best pirates, Vulcan is (still) the worst, Miles has a Corsair costume, Lilandra has lovely plumage, no one knows how to pronounce “M’Kraan,” we studiously avoid discussing the Phoenix force, Saurids speak Hebrew, Raza Longknife’s name is a bit on the nose, Rachel is the worst at hugs, Greg has a ‘ship, and we all kind of identify with Cyclops.

X-Plained:

  • The Starjammers (and how to pronounce their names)
  • The Shi’ar
  • The Neremani Dynasty
  • Plumage
  • Apostrophe abuse
  • Corsair
  • The secret origins of the Starjammers
  • Why Hepzibah talks like that
  • The Rule of Cool
  • Visor iterations
  • Summerstaches
  • Cyclops’s dubious deductive skills
  • Hugs
  • The All-New, All-the-Same X-Men
  • Teenagers, again
  • Cyclops #1
  • Cyclops vs. Scott
  • Space-parenting
  • Rachel’s convention sketchbook
  • Greg’s Kitty Pryde feelings
  • An exceptionally vivid threat
  • Intergalactic fashion
  • Corsair’s pecs
  • Key parties in space
  • The greatest romance of the Marvel Universe

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Next week: Welcome to the Claremont era, listeners—hope you survive the experience!

 

Days of Future Past, &c.

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As promised, here’s a link to Rachel’s (miraculously spoiler-free) Days of Future Past review over at Wired.com.

We also want to take a moment to note that making a good movie does not give Bryan Singer a pass for allegedly raping children. Whether that affects your decision to see Days of Future Past is your call—we’re not advising one way or the other—but either way, we hope you’ll join us in making a donation to RAINN.

This week, writer Greg Rucka will be joining us to talk about the Starjammers and his new Cyclops ongoing series! If you have questions for us or for Greg, stick ’em in the comments below or our Tumblr askbox, or tweet ’em to @RaeBeta with the hashtag #xplainthexmen!

As Mentioned on Episode 6 – Days of Future Whatever

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Listen to the podcast here!

Be prepared.
X-Men #141, the first issue of “Days of Future Past,” has one of the most frequently referenced covers in all of X-Men. (Fun fact: We almost went with this one for the podcast cover art.)
For once, they’re not kidding.
Gravestone standards have slipped somewhat in this future.
The All-Old, Mostly-Not-That-Different X-Men of “Days of Future Past.”
Kitty Pryde vs. the Danger Room.
Kate Pryde vs. time travel.
Kate Pryde X-Plains the future.
Why would you dress like this for a congressional hearing, Angel? What is WRONG with you?
The All-New, Mostly-Different Brotherhood of Evil Mutants!
Rick Redfern and Joan Caucus of Doonesbury cameo in X-Men #142, to our eternal delight.
Splinter timelines are a bitch.
Even Excalibur–the team built around Multiverse hijinks–can’t quite figure out how this stuff works.
Earth 200500: definitely the best timeline.
We generally like Emma Frost, but she is so boring in X-Men: First Class that we literally forgot she was in the movie.
NOT A WOLF.
Next week: Greg Rucka, Cyclops, and the Starjammers!

Further Reading:

Summers School: Gabriel 101

“Days of Future Past”

The Marvel Comics Database Universe Listing

Rachel’s recap of X-Men Origins: Wolverine

The post-credits scene from The Wolverine

25 Moments (X-Men: Days of Future Past viral marketing site)

Did you know that we have a shop? We totally do.

6 – Days of Future Whatever

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which we more or less prepare you for the upcoming feature film; Rachel Summers is a black hole of continuity; Kitty Pryde breaks the Danger Room; Earth 200500 is clearly the best earth; even the X-Men have no idea what’s going on; First Class Emma Frost is so boring that we forget she exists; wolverines are definitely not wolves; and you can have Rachel’s Community references when you pry them from her cold, dead hands.

X-Plained:

  • Rachel Summers
  • “Days of Future Past”
  • Gravestone engraving standards of 2013
  • The Mostly-New, Mostly-Different Brotherhood of Evil Mutants
  • Another unfortunate hat
  • Causality in the Marvel Multiverse
  • Earths 811, 1191, 295, 311, and 200500
  • Hall monitors with laser rifles
  • How to fix a broken timeline
  • The X-Men cinematic universe, and points of divergence from the comics
  • The one thing X-Men: The Last Stand does right
  • The Xavier Index of Cinematic Continuity
  • The difference between Canis lupus and Gulo gulo
  • A Days of Future Past cinematic cram course
  • Fix-it fic
  • Blink, Bishop, and dark-future mash-ups
  • The enduring appeal of Earth-811
  • The significantly less enduring appeal of Earth-242
  • The Nazi Excalibur of Earth-597

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Next week: Greg Rucka, Cyclops, and Starjammers!