Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Category: podcasts

201 – Pump Up the Jam

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we begin our third podcast century; Cyclops is bi-inclusive; we have high standards for Mojoworld; Dazzler can survive your big-budget horror show; Jim Lee makes his exit; video games that involve Protomen are better than video games that don’t; and plasma is the new magnetism.

X-PLAINED:

  • Carter Ryking and his Very Durable Underpants
  • Fontanelle
  • Jay & Miles Town Cry ye X-Men
  • An upcoming event
  • X-Men #10-13
  • A somewhat disappointing Wizard of Oz pastiche
  • Those who like to go both ways
  • A mysterious, shadowy figure; revealed
  • Several of Cyclops’s uncoolest Dad moments
  • Zima
  • Moist Alley
  • Mojo II: The Sequel
  • The Image exodus
  • Mojonium™
  • An announcement
  • Longshot in the Mojoverse vs. Longshot in the 616
  • A Maverick adventure
  • Alexander Ryking
  • The other Xavier File
  • Warhawk
  • The Ryking Hospital for Paranormal Research
  • A poorly defined power set
  • Technicolor skeletons
  • When and where paper was invented
  • A likely-irrelevant pattern
  • The devil who haunts Stryfe’s dreams
  • Some non-X Marvel recommendations
  • Rusty Collins’s codename

NEXT EPISODE: A musical interlude with X-Factor!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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200 – Lightning in a Bottle, with Louise Simonson

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we celebrate a major milestone with the coolest person ever to work on the X-books and look back at the last four-plus years of the podcast; and nobody ends up on trial at the Hague.

NEXT WEEK: Jay & Miles take a much-needed vacation.

NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men take the fight to Mojoworld!

Check out our blog for links to the stuff we discussed in this episode!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

199 – Space, Geeks, and Gaveedra Seven

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Shattershot is definitely better than the Cold War; Beast X-plains the X-teams; Cyclops is a tired babysitter; sustenance is not frivolous; Jim Henson is the hero that Mojoworld needs; Shatterstar is not a great head of state; it’s hard to be Val Cooper; and Cable has definitely figured out how to take you (yes, YOU) out.

X-PLAINED:

  • Astra
  • Content-to-story ratio
  • The Mojoverse (more) (again)
  • Longshot
  • Shatterstar (Gaveedra Seven)
  • Spiral (Ricochet Rita)
  • Arize
  • X-Men Annual #1
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual #16
  • X-Factor Annual #10
  • X-Force Annual #1
  • A pivotal battle
  • Mujahideen
  • A callback
  • Several denizens of Mojoworld
  • X-Team disambiguation
  • The Death Sponsors
  • A dubious solution to the Kobayashi Maru scenario
  • Whether Arize is a mutant
  • Telepathic favoritism
  • Spiral’s origin story
  • A new regime
  • Earth-84309
  • Powerpax (Frankie Power)
  • Darkchild
  • Cyberlock
  • A metasingularity
  • A large number of back-up features
  • The X-Men’s top ten enemies
  • Amalgam (but not that one)
  • Darick Robertson’s juvenilia
  • The return of Taki
  • The Cable Protocols
  • Brazilian Marvel characters
  • Our feelings about Laura Kinney’s backstory

NEXT EPISODE: Louise Simonson

CORRECTION: BonziBuddy was not released until 1999. We regret the error.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

198 – How to Destroy the Universe Without Really Trying

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Excalibur goes 16-bit platformer; Alysande gets new threads; Shadowcat should probably just change her code name to Ripley; Captain Britain may or may not destroy the universe; Doctor Doom tries his hand at human resources; Excalibur is at home with weirdness; and no lizard needs breasts.

X-PLAINED:

  • Invisible Boy
  • Human heralds of Galactus
  • Excalibur Special Editions
  • Excalibur: Air Apparent
  • Excalibur: XX Crossing
  • Dr. Jonothon Cayre
  • Norm the LMD
  • Lava pits of Scotland
  • Some dubious herpetology
  • Eric the Cyborg (Coldblood-7)
  • Robert Cop
  • Special Man
  • Air-Walker and/or Gabriel Lam
  • A cosmic explosion
  • Captain Britain’s extra costume
  • Sidestep
  • An exceptionally awkward job interview
  • A counterintuitive plan
  • The other time-displaced X-Men
  • The best version of Angel
  • Angel’s third-greatest nemesis
  • Gladiator Hank
  • A very fancy vest
  • The best Excalibur Special Edition
  • The Phalanx vs. the Technarchy
  • Warlock vs. gender
  • Our thoughts on Avengers: Infinity War

Note: according to the letter column from Excalibur #54, at least some of the art credits for Excalibur: XX Crossing were incorrect, so some of our descriptions of who drew what in this episode are wrong. See the comments below for more information!

NEXT EPISODE: Shattershot!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

197 – Wolverine and the Honker of Doom

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Wolverine is an eternal teenager; most of what Jay knows about Hawaii comes from Lilo and Stitch; Shiv is a complicated fellow; Nightcrawler represents an unattainable beauty standard; the Easter Bunny flies at dawn; Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure is delightful; Logan inadvertently starts a cult; Gahk does as she pleases; Jay and Miles are going to FlameCon; and we are all now Honkers forever.

X-PLAINED:

  • What Bloodscream and Roughouse have been up to
  • Albert and Elsie Dee
  • An unorthodox vocal warm-up
  • Wolverine: Bloody Choices
  • Wolverine: The Jungle Adventure
  • The Wolverine formula
  • Kamehameha Day (which Jay mispronounced; sorry!)
  • Mr. Bullfinch
  • Mr. Kapeland
  • Shiv
  • Doc Corbel
  • Nick Fury’s penmanship
  • How retail works
  • Secret agents, maybe
  • A stimulating combination
  • Karate pants
  • A darker, grittier version of the Easter bunny
  • Wolverine’s apocryphal childhood
  • Characters who can pull off the Wolverine hairstyle
  • Don Adams as Wolverine
  • Win/win murder scenarios
  • Two adult men discussing their feelings
  • Honkers
  • Cargo cults
  • The Tribe of Fire
  • Gahck
  • Some romance
  • A Spiny Honker
  • The Honker of Doom
  • Pit traps, with and without shallow holes
  • A dastardly but ineffectual plot
  • Apocalypse, kind of
  • One of Wolverine’s many kids (who may or may not be Erista)
  • Jay & Miles at FlameCon 2018
  • How to get us at your local convention
  • Reading comics with Miles’s dad
  • Seriously, though: honkers

NEXT EPISODE: Even more Excaliburs

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

195 – Johnny Got His Robot Arm

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay may have Stockholm syndrome; Nick Fury is objectively sillier than G. W. Bridge; we get a brief artistic reprieve; Cable’s legal expertise does not extend to trademarks; our favorite Ship returns; Miles’s grandmother calls it like it is; Sauron is bad at taxonomy; and Garrison Kane is basically a very violent Inspector Gadget.

X-PLAINED:

  • Brother Mutant
  • X-Force #8-10
  • X-Force (again)
  • A protracted flashback
  • The Wild and/or Six Pack
  • A heist
  • A trap
  • Yet more Ed Wood references
  • A future
  • The Professor (Ship)
  • Gratuitous face shadows
  • A mystery
  • Cable casting
  • Several misplaced word balloons
  • The logistics of tentacle arms
  • The High Lords (Externals)
  • Michael Bay’s Johnny Got His Gun
  • General Clark and his diving suit
  • Good Magneto stories
  • How to get your dad into X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur vs. the Anti-Phoenix!

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Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

 

194 – Brood Trouble in the Big Easy

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In which Ghost Rider has some fairly serious medical issues; you should probably never invite Bishop to a picnic; Gambit’s past catches up with him; it’s always Mardi Gras in Fictional New Orleans; Wolverine is thrilled; and Jay swears a solemn vow.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Tithe
  • The Momentary Princess
  • The T’ieves Guild
  • Why real New Orleans doesn’t have catacombs
  • X-Men #8-9
  • Ghost Rider #26-27
  • The abstract idea of Nicholas Cage
  • Genesis
  • The last of the X-Men
  • A sick burn
  • A picnic
  • Boundaries
  • Bella Donna Boudreaux and her many apostrophes
  • Ghost Rider
  • Psegway
  • Julian Boudreaux
  • How not to respond to a speeding ticket
  • The Bootie Man
  • Horse names vs. katana names
  • Cathartic excess
  • X-holidays
  • Doomsday
  • Good characters from awful events

NEXT EPISODE: The Externals, for our sins

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

193 – Sewers of Tomorrow

28 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we pour one out for Malcolm and Randall; Cyclops is the worst at fun; Storm is better than you and always will be; Bishop forgets his first name; the X-Men can’t tie bow ties; Iceman’s dad is spectacularly awful; Mikhail Rasputin may have some lingering issues; and Doug Ramsey would probably have been pretty entertained by Hackers if he had survived long enough to see it.

X-PLAINED:

  • Whether Professor Xavier is dead
  • Marvel time vs. podcast time
  • Uncanny X-Men #287-290
  • The Wit and Wisdom of Henry McCoy
  • A dance of death and destruction
  • Styglut
  • Future flashbacks
  • Sewers of tomorrow
  • The Witness
  • “Fun”
  • Blood math
  • A mysterious letter
  • A terrible date
  • Several capes
  • The return of the cyburai
  • A theoretical Hackers crossover

NEXT EPISODE: Brood trouble in the Big Easy!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

192 – Meet the N-Men

19 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Alan Davis’s Excalibur is a spiritual sibling to The Muppet Show; Captain Britain gets a Captain Britain lesson; Opal Luna Saturnyne has no time for your nonsense; Meggan and Rachel take a brief detour into a Hammer film; Earth-148 is extra heroic; no member of Excalibur will ever use a bathroom in peace; Cerise joins the team; Technet embraces the future; and the end of the world is nigh.

X-PLAINED:

  • Pixie’s powers and parentage
  • Several eccentricities of Jay’s apartment
  • Excalibur #45-47
  • Earth-148 (Ee’rath)
  • Comics pacing vs. podcast pacing
  • Technet (more) (again)
  • Amelia Witherspoon and several references related thereto
  • The N-Men
  • How to Captain Britain
  • The multiversal significance of the lighthouse
  • A portentous chess game
  • A particularly aggressive retcon
  • The return of the Neuri
  • The real Meggan
  • Necrom
  • A heroic death
  • The true curse of Excalibur
  • Some very specific citations
  • A reunion
  • Kylun (Colin McKay)
  • A blessed event
  • Cerise
  • Whether Rogue can control Cyclops’s powers
  • Laura Kinney’s upcoming reversion to X-23

NEXT EPISODE: Bishop joins the X-Men!

ENTIRELY IRRELEVANT UPDATE: The wall on which Jay was attempting to mount a desk turned out to be plaster over sheetrock. Office plans are being revised accordingly.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)