Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

236 – Baggage of Traumas Past (Fatal Attractions, Part 3)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Decimation was kind of sketchy; you should definitely come see us in Seattle; Wolverine has a rough day; Colossus has yet another rough day; Excalibur plans for the future; and Fatal Attractions comes to a close.

X-PLAINED:

  • How Professor X got his groove and/or powers back
  • Jay & Miles at Emerald City Comic Con
  • Wolverine #75
  • Excalibur #71
  • Psychic trauma
  • High-stakes references
  • The personal Ragnarok of a shattered soul
  • A really effective sound effect
  • The first day of the rest of Logan’s life
  • Butterflies of the Xavier School
  • Muir Island’s psychiatric ward
  • Medical consent
  • The worst bar, probably
  • Professorial disambiguation
  • What Micromax and Kyluun are probably definitely up to
  • Several variably awkward Grey-Summers family reunions
  • A betrayal
  • Amelia Voght
  • Unuscione
  • Katu
  • The future of Excalibur
  • Proactive superheroism
  • How not to make a White Russian
  • Shadowcat’s recovery post-Mutant Massacre
  • Our etymological destinies

NEXT EPISODE: It’s time to get X-TREME!


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235 – Fatal Extractions (Fatal Attractions, Part 2)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Magneto may or may not own a Namor body pillow; Cyclops probably doesn’t color-code his files; Colossus is Not Okay; bats are nature’s flashers; there are a lot of reasons to be mad at Fatal Attractions; Charles Xavier is surprisingly durable; the X-Men know their Aeschylus; Jean Grey goes in through the face; and bringing Wolverine to fight the guy who controls metal was probably not a great idea.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mutant Alpha
  • Uncanny X-Men #304
  • X-Men #25
  • False foreshadowing
  • Costume storage and display
  • Relative moral event horizons
  • The character dehabilitation of Magneto
  • The Magneto Protocols
  • How Cyclops organizes his files
  • An excellent eulogy
  • The complicated legacy of Illyana Rasputin
  • Several noteworthy absences
  • A memorable funeral
  • The ‘behold’ thing
  • A protective mesh of electromagnetic fire
  • A well-played callback
  • A strategically dubious plan
  • Several Prometheus Bound quotations
  • An uncharitable assumption
  • The blood-brain barrier
  • A severe costume injury
  • The definitive scene of Fatal Attractions
  • The root of Onslaught
  • Which X-Men would podcast
  • Our preferred comics formats

NEXT EPISODE: Colossus still can’t catch a break


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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234 – Magnetic Feels (Fatal Attractions Part 1)

WHOA DANG! This is David Wynne’s 200th illustration for our show! Wanna buy one of David’s original illustrations, or commission a new piece? Drop him a line!

In which the Acolytes are pretty terrible; Exodus considers his options; Val Cooper is not wildly trustworthy; Cable uses his words; and people with significant metal implants should probably stop confronting Magneto.

X-PLAINED:

  • How not to get possessed by Mister Sinister
  • Crossover structures
  • How not to make friends or influence people
  • The Acolytes (again)
  • X-Factor #92
  • A total dick move
  • The new Project Wideawake
  • X-Force #25
  • A first appearance
  • Cable #1-3
  • A reunion
  • Avalon
  • Magneto’s bathrobe
  • The evolution of X-Force
  • Mojoworld in the multiverse
  • X-characters who haven’t officially died at least once

NEXT EPISODE: Fatal Extractions!


Happy podiversary to our beloved illustrator, David Wynne!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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233 – Electromagnetism Unlimited

X-Men Unlimited.

In which X-Men Unlimited begins; Cyclops’s powers remain wildly inconsistent; electromagnetic fields are the gamma rays of the early ‘90s; Siena Blaze should probably take some science courses; Magneto is a complex dude; and the Marvel Universe could really use adequate mental healthcare.

X-PLAINED:

  • Tradeoffs
  • X-Men Unlimited
  • Several other Unlimited series
  • The Gregorian calendar
  • Chris Bachalo
  • Storm’s-eye view
  • Electromagnetic fields
  • Diverse approaches to problem-solving
  • One of Cyclops’s many issues
  • An unfortunate encounter with Magneto
  • A memorial
  • Magneto, his origins, and his many pseudonyms
  • The Victor Von Doom paradox
  • A terrible plan
  • Physical mannerisms in comics
  • An unfortunate encounter with Magneto, revisited
  • Mental healthcare in the Marvel Universe
  • What happened to the Soul Sword

NEXT EPISODE: FATAL ATTRACTIONS


Special thanks to consulting X-Pert @beccastareyes!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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232 – Careful With That Axe, Cerise

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we’re still not over Into the Spider-Verse; Excalibur becomes an official X-book; Feron tries to help; Butts are fundamental; we care about the weird stuff; threats are unnecessary; and we were all always already Erik the Red.

X-PLAINED:

  • Several characters’ Earth-65 counterparts
  • The X-Office
  • Judging people for not being Alan Davis
  • Excalibur #68-70
  • A slippery story title
  • The unceremonious disappearance of Captain Britain
  • Mullets of space and time
  • Angst-ridden super-types, all of whom are morbidly obsessed with death
  • The other war criminal in Excalibur
  • Fashion trends of the Shi’ar Empire
  • Krag
  • Important conversations to have with your significant other
  • A sadness staredown
  • Cerise’s actual secret origins
  • A fairly poetic life sentence
  • The cleverest fights
  • Our 2019 Convention Schedule
  • How to get Jay & Miles at your local convention

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Unlimited!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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231 – Life Bites

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which DC is out of our bailiwick; Random gets around; someone finally makes an explicit reference to disability politics; death has not improved the Chalkers; Strong Guy can’t catch a break; we’re all whole other people; Sienna Blaze has a crayon name; we totally want to play D&D with Evan Skolnick; a trading card does not a memorable character make; and we are 100% here for the mutant episode of Sesame Street.

  • X-PLAINED:
  • What happened to Fred Duncan
  • Beastwriting
  • Marvel’s 1993 Annuals
  • The speculator boom
  • X-Factor Annual #8
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual #17
  • Excalibur Annual #1
  • Charlie Ronalds (Charon) and his issues
  • A protracted Batman reference
  • How to string pearls
  • A dubious twist on the danger room
  • The pure joy of a child, but twisted and distorted like a shredded butterfly
  • Cloot (Satannish)
  • Howling Mad, by Peter David
  • The greatest enemies of X-Factor (but not really)
  • Cruel and arbitrary moralizing
  • The other X-Cutioner (Carl Denti)
  • A protracted illusion
  • The Amazing Icemaster
  • Metacommentary
  • An accidental trap
  • The death of Jason Wyngarde (Mastermind)
  • Resolution versus forgiveness
  • The other first appearance of Sienna Blaze
  • More wizard stuff
  • Khaos
  • Khaos & Gritty 4 Lyfe
  • Ghath
  • Irth
  • Mutants on Sesame Street
  • Cycling in and out of comics

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur goes to space!


CORRECTION: Chris Claremont did not in fact write Dragonlance comics.


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

230 – Touchstones

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which tragedy strikes; leisure suits are underappreciated; Jubilee is fundamentally opposed to feelings; that MCU joke would definitely have been hilarious; we have trouble accepting Beast as a 20-something; when Gambit and Rogue work, they work; Wolverine makes an unlikely agony aunt; Dr. Strange was the mentor Illyana Rasputin really needed; and What If: Magik is pretty much a perfect comic.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Human High Council
  • Many terrible things that have happened to the Rasputin family
  • Uncanny X-Men #303
  • X-Men #24
  • What If: Magik
  • A tonal disconnect
  • Leisure Suit Larry
  • A prospective movie marathon
  • Insecurity
  • Molecular Cohesion Unit
  • The death of Illyana Rasputin (and its aftermath)
  • Death in America
  • A dubious idea for a theme park
  • A reunion
  • Papa Gumbo’s Cajun Cookout
  • Illyana Rasputin and Dr. Strange
  • Navigating vs. erasing trauma
  • Why What If: Magik is absolutely amazing
  • How to cite X-Men volumes
  • Earth-242 (Earth on Fire)

NEXT EPISODE: The other X-Cutioner!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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229 – Giant-Size Special #7

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we are beset by festivity; Scott Summers still can’t take a vacation; the Daysprings are a really good family; “G’journey” is a really good greeting; Stryfe is his own namesake; retcons have served Cable well; illustrator David Wynne makes his X-Plain podcast debut; and you should probably go ahead and get a shelf for all these awards.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Hayes family
  • The Grey-Summers Family circa 1993
  • The Adventures of Cyclops and Phoenix #1-4
  • Summers/Sommers disambiguation
  • Gene Ha
  • Time travel
  • Earth-4935
  • Mother Askani
  • Prelate Ch’vayre
  • What “Askani” means
  • When and whether Cable sleeps
  • The passage of time
  • Slym and Redd Dayspring
  • A biblical allusion
  • A very good greeting
  • Prior Turrin
  • “Old” English
  • Li’l Stryfe
  • Some constraints of superhero comics
  • Parenting
  • Rachel Summers’s self-image
  • The origin of Cable’s codename
  • David Wynne and his art
  • “Strontium Dogs”
  • The X-Fandom starter pack
  • The Fifth Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence
  • D&D with the Blue Team
  • All-New staying power
  • Fictional intersectionality
  • Change, in general

NEXT EPISODE: Bring kleenex.


CORRECTION: In this episode, Miles states that Scott and Jean are cool. They are, in fact, categorically uncool. We regret the error.


Special thanks to carolers Tina Carleton, Matt Gardner, Peter Gresser, Erin Pence, and Steve Pence!


Check out the visual companion to this episode–along with all the song lyrics and the complete Corbeau awards–on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which it still sucks to be a Rasputin; John Romita Jr. has a solid, if muscular, grasp of anatomy; Jay and Miles are better exes than Forge and anyone; and Cannonball’s many younger siblings have almost prepared him for running X-Force.

X-PLAINED:

  • Peters Parker
  • The Merry X-Men Holiday Special
  • Comic book release schedules vs. J&MXPtXM
  • Uncanny X-Men #301-302
  • Trevor F**king Fitzroy, possibly the worst Upstart
  • Comics Code Authority closeting versus real-life closeting
  • 21st Century Torture Devices
  • Risky mood fonts
  • Robert’s Rules of Upstart Order (this week)
  • Gamesmaster vs. the Isolationist
  • Shinobi Shaw: Good At Sex
  • Russian tragedy (more, again)
  • Charles Xavier and his poor decisions
  • Shi’ar tech support
  • Pants and villainy
  • Racist jerks vs. rhetorical questions
  • TIME PARADOX
  • Weirdly specific contingencies
  • Piotr Rasputin and his justified fury
  • X-Force #24
  • Meaningless (but fun!) timestamps
  • The Friends of Humanity (who are not our friends)
  • Rusty and Skids’ latest arrest
  • Disappointed Dad Sam Guthrie
  • Action vs. public perception
  • Vinz Clortho
  • Domino’s continuing quest to figure out what exactly an X-Force is
  • The dramatic return of… well, you know
  • Spacesuit logistics
  • Numerical universe designations
  • Plastic Warlock

NEXT EPISODE: Our Fifth Annual Giant-Size Winter Special!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

227 – Wolverine, Killing

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Cowboy Poet Wolverine is the best Wolverine; the Masters of the Universe basically had Internet Cat names; Miles has an Early Metallica moment; Wolverine: Killing is just ludicrously excellent; and the hawk joke somehow keeps going.

X-PLAINED:

  • An eccentric approach to ecoterrorism
  • Wolverine: Inner Fury
  • Wolverine: Killing
  • The narrative limits of Bill Sienkiewicz
  • Various Terrors
  • The Whale and/or Shark
  • Microminibots
  • A trap
  • Mr. Big
  • A sexy coffee cup
  • Literary allusions
  • Atmospheric narration
  • Urban despair
  • A peculiar community
  • Cowboy Poet Wolverine
  • A thematic meditation
  • Depressingly exceptional representation of a lady in peril
  • King Hiss
  • The world according to Logan
  • The theoretical microbrewery scene of an imaginary enclave
  • Regional differences in IPAs
  • Feelings and their various sources
  • The symbolism of Wolverine’s costume
  • Home
  • How Archangel sleeps
  • Adamantium vs. Vibranium

NEXT EPISODE: This ‘n’ that ‘n’ Rusty ‘n’ Skids!


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)