Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

280 – Business-Casual Basilisk

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the future is not great at codenames; spot foil is cool as hell; Mountjoy is bafflingly business-themed; Bishop goes full Point Break; Jean Grey and Lorna Dane should absolutely be friends; and Jay & Miles are heading to ECCC 2020!

X-PLAINED:

  • Lola vs. L.O.L.A.
  • A very good cat
  • Bishop #1-4
  • Lucas Bishop
  • Earth-1191
  • X.S.E.
  • A surprising convergence
  • Guilt
  • Bantam
  • Mountjoy
  • Some terrible banter
  • Several nontraditional modes of possession
  • Shard Bishop
  • How the kids talk these days
  • Hancock
  • Fashion of the future
  • A complex ethical struggle

NEXT EPISODE: More Cats references.


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279 – Giant-Size Special #8

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay would absolutely fight Christmas; we welcome guest X-Perts Christina Strain and Chip Zdarsky; a gift arrives; we consider the relationship of Generation X to Generation X; it is really not okay to leave your discarded skins lying around; D.O.A. is inordinately delightful; Chamber is the punk Shadow; Gateway goes to school; the Generation X TV movie is very, very bad; telepathy is free; the grown-ups are all right; home sucks; freedom rocks; Mondo deserves better; Matt Frewer did most things first; Kevin McNulty has appeared in literally everything; and you remain our favorites, ever.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mutation, for some value of the term
  • Holidays and the observation thereof
  • December 9
  • Jay’s ideal Christmas
  • How Chris Bachalo’s name is pronounced (more) (again) (sorry)
  • Several promotions
  • Generation X
  • Generation X #1-4
  • Generation X
  • Husk (Paige Guthrie)
  • M (Monet St. Croix)
  • Skin (Angelo Espinosa)
  • Synch (Everett Thomas)
  • Chamber (Jonothon Starsmore)
  • The New Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters
  • Counting Genises
  • The housekeeping implications of body horror
  • The M retcon
  • Continuity in costume design
  • The Danger Grotto
  • Emplate (somewhat)
  • D.O.A.
  • Penance (not that one)
  • Scrabble burns
  • An alternate take on power duplication
  • Mondo ()
  • The return of Nanny and the Orphanmaker
  • Eliot ()
  • A tentative friendship
  • How the Age of Apocalypse comes to Generation X
  • A movie that never fails to disappoint
  • The vagaries of adaptation
  • The best on-screen Emma Frost
  • Gang emails of the 1990s
  • Refrax
  • Buff
  • William Castle
  • The comedic genealogy of Max Headroom
  • Hatley Castle
  • The 2019 Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence

NEXT WEEK: Jay & Miles go on vacation!
NEXT EPISODE: Bishop goes solo!


Special thanks to Christina Strain, Douglas Wolk, and Chip Zdarsky; and–always–to Matt Hunter, David Wynne, Tea Fougner, Anna Sheffey, and all of our patrons and listeners!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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278 – A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Moonstar really wasn’t fooling anybody; Bird Brain is somehow still alive; Cassidy Keep is weird; Gene Ha draws excellent Storm; Reeva Payge makes her sole comics appearance; and Shinobi Shaw is wrong about everything.

X-PLAINED:

  • A not-particularly-cunning disguise
  • Upcoming coverage
  • X-Force Annual #3
  • X-Men Annual #3
  • The MLF
  • Reignfire (more) (again)
  • Moonstar (more) (again)
  • An unconventional way to keep a secret diary
  • A bittersweet semi-reunion
  • 3Peace
  • Murphy Keep
  • A ghost, maybe
  • The kind of thing that happens at Cassidy Keep
  • An excellent burn
  • Leather
  • “Neurotoxins”
  • Sex House as the definitive artifact of the 2010s
  • How not to draw someone having a nightmare
  • A very short-lived version of the Hellfire Club
  • How not to villain
  • Coming to terms with bad fictional tech

NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special, feat. Christina Strain & Chip Zdarsky!


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277 – Hedgehogs of Cairo

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Sauron is a huge nerd; the Savage Land is where Marvel stores the weird stuff; an etymology detour does not come from the X-Pert you’d expect; and Storm will straight-up stab you.

X-PLAINED:

  • Responsible weapon storage
  • X-Men Unlimited #6-7
  • A very large creative team
  • Sauron (more) (again)
  • Blood-derived powers
  • The Mutates
  • A pterosaur glow-up
  • Achmed El-Gibar
  • Street urchins (and the etymology thereof)
  • How to get a t’ieve mentor
  • Style vs. taste
  • The proportional relationship between knife skills and leadership potential
  • Tattoos vs. healing factors

NEXT EPISODE: Sex?


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276 – Wizard Problems

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Excalibur gets a regular writer again; we judge a book against against its covers; nothing good ever comes from being sexy on Muir Isle; and the soul sword’s real power is cutting through continuity.

X-PLAINED:

  • Stegron
  • Dinosaur powers
  • Excalibur #83-85 (The Soul Sword Trilogy)
  • Warren Ellis on Excalibur
  • Excalibur (more) (again)
  • Bends Sinister and Bend Sinister
  • Outsider days
  • Mail
  • Boundaries
  • Darkoth
  • Gravemoss
  • The Winding Way
  • Shrill
  • A problematic prosthesis
  • Roger Corman’s The Raven
  • A large number of continuity errors
  • Gratuitous dickery
  • An untold tale
  • The semantics of skin removal
  • Possession vs. retrograde amnesia
  • The circle of nostalgia

NEXT EPISODE: Jorts Unlimited!


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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275 – End of the Summer

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Professor is too cool for the Phalanx; fatphobia is significantly more dangerous than Fred Dukes; Strong Guy catches a plane; Emma Frost will not let you coast; Jubilee says goodbye to the X-Men; and it’s probably for the best that we have avoided corporate advertisers.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mr. M
  • Thor: Metal Gods
  • Ship (more) (again)
  • The Phalanx vs. the Borg
  • Several cover homages
  • X-Force #39
  • X-Factor #107
  • Uncanny X-Men #318
  • Prosh
  • The myriad delights of embodiment
  • A complex theory about Leprechauns
  • Benefits of single-issue stories
  • Strong Guy vs. the Blob
  • Strong Guy vs. Gravity
  • Strong Guy vs. an airplane
  • Strong Guy vs. biology
  • Several explosions
  • The kids of Generation X
  • Deluxe-format comics
  • The Xavier Institute for Higher Learning
  • Goodbyes
  • Dazzler’s relative immortality
  • Jay’s X-Men Happy Meal Toy wish list
  • How to make a page-accurate Warlock toy

NEXT EPISODE: The Soul Sword Trilogy


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274 – The Red Shoe Prophecies (feat. Chris Eddleman)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Chris Eddleman joins us for a close look at House of X and Powers of X; Doug Ramsey is highly relevant; resurrection is problematic in a universe with a documented afterlife; there is no reasonable in-continuity justification for the lack of trans Marvel characters; and your OT3 is canon.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Phalanx (more) (again) (retconned)
  • House of X
  • Powers of X
  • Krakoa (more) (again) (retconned)
  • Moira MacTaggert (retconned)
  • Bar Sinister
  • Sinister Secrets
  • Portentous red shoes
  • The Man-Machine Ascendancy
  • Chimeras
  • North
  • Cardinal
  • Rasputin
  • Homo Novissima
  • Transhumanism in the Marvel Universe
  • The metaphysics of Krakoan resurrection
  • The Five
  • The true nature of Goldballs’ powers
  • Trans representation and its absence
  • Retroactive foreshadowing

NEXT EPISODE: Still not quite Generation X


CORRECTION: The story Jay referred to as “Everything Burns” is in fact titled “Time Runs Out,” although a good many things do burn over its course.


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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273 – The Back-End Creep (The Phalanx Covenant, Part 3 of 3)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we have been on All the Podcasts; Full Shred Thrash is easier to say that it sounds; the Phalanx uses dial-up; Cable is a very large man; Larry Hama writes excellent banter; Cyclops has been progressively desensitized to plane crashes; Cameron Hodge is never graceful in defeat; and Final Sanction is actually about family.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mithras
  • A large number of guest appearances
  • Thor: Metal Gods
  • The Phalanx Covenant so far
  • Full Shred Thrash
  • Adam Kubert
  • Wolverine #85
  • Cable #16
  • Gorp, Waldo, and Apache
  • Popping silk
  • A Summers family reunion
  • Jean and Nathan
  • Jean Grey’s astral form
  • Genetics
  • Several airplanes
  • Mountain climbing
  • Gelatinous yahoos
  • Several impermanent deaths
  • Pregnant X-team members
  • Outside references to the X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: House of X, feat. Chris Eddleman


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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272 – Children of the Phalanx (the Phalanx Covenant, Part 2 of 3)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Ship was inside Cable all along; Life Signs is the Two Towers of the Phalanx Covenant (but only in the bad ways), it’s lucky that the Phalanx doesn’t have WiFi; Nightcrawler embraces chaos; and we promise the crossover gets better next chapter.

X-PLAINED:

  • How Cable got his Ship back
  • Miles’s official stance on candy corn
  • The Two Towers of the Phalanx Covenant
  • X-Factor #106
  • X-Force #38
  • Excalibur #82
  • A monastery party
  • Douglock (more) (again)
  • Forge-O-Vision
  • How Steven Lang got mixed up with the Phalanx
  • Stages of Phalanx development
  • Babel
  • Giuseppe Russo, shepherd
  • The Phalanx, but dogs
  • Shinar
  • What you get when you meet a stranger in the Alps
  • Whom we’d like to see draw the Phalanx
  • Mindwifery
  • Adulthood
  • “Stealth”
  • Where baby Phalanxes come from
  • Teamwork
  • Good stories about Hope Summers
  • What happened to Paul Bailey

NEXT EPISODE: Rock climbing with the Summers Family


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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271 – Abs for Days (The Phalanx Covenant, Part 1 of 3)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we’re finally both back in the virtual studio; Generation X is the new Inferno; the Phalanx Covenant begins; we’re not talking about Hickman in our coverage of this story; Banshee is the adult in the room; the Phalanx is pretty sexist; and gross powers are cool.

X-PLAINED:

  • Blink
  • Peter Sís
  • The Phalanx Covenant
  • “Generation Next” (but not Generation Next)
  • Uncanny X-Men #316-317
  • X-Men #36-37
  • Yet another way to do a crossover event
  • Some very good visual branding
  • What we’re not covering
  • Sexy Banshee
  • Retired Colonel Gayle Cordbecker
  • Monet St. Croix (kind of)
  • Coaxing
  • Early days of the Internets
  • Everett Thomas (Synch)
  • The fate of Sara Grey
  • Phalanx Phashion
  • Angelo Espinosa (Skin)
  • Clarice Ferguson (Blink)
  • Some guy allegedly named Gregor
  • Harvest
  • A very expensive house
  • An apparent death

NEXT EPISODE: Forge does not get a puppy.


NOTE: Jay was right: LiveJournal first launched in 1999.


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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!