Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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As Mentioned in Episode 448 – Skamageddon

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The two Emma Frosts: Shadowy and Pouty. (X-Force #87)
James Proudstar x-plains Uncanny X-Men #281. (X-Force #87)
Reconnecting via X-Factoring. (X-Force #87)
Now that is a lair. (X-Force #87)
Magma’s back! And she’s a jerk! (X-Force #87)
Meet Paradigm. (X-Force #87)
The New New Mutants vs. the New Hellions. New. (X-Force #88)
We can accept covering Empath’s face with word balloons – but hey, show some respect to Firestar! (X-Force #88)
Feral’s back – just in time to wreck Jay’s voice again! (And Siryn’s, but we’ll get to that later.) (X-Force #88)
Life got complicated since the last time these two saw each other. (X-Force #88)
X-Force’s x-treme tactics have just saved us like half an issue of misunderstandings! (X-Force #88)
The techno-organic virus: bad for free will and not great for skin health. (X-Force #88)
Paradigm x-plains X-Force. (X-Force #89)
This party sucks! (X-Force #89)
Blood relation has no inherent virtue. (X-Force #89)
Aww, there’s plenty of logic! Just look at the little manual that comes with most Tarot decks! (X-Force #89)
Among Dani’s new powers is the ability to turn robot-guys into eggs. (X-Force #89)
Kind of a weird font choice. Times New Armageddon? (X-Force #89)
Feral never misses an opportunity to learn the worst possible lesson. (X-Force #90)
Tarot, is that really a new manifestation of your mutant power, or did you just rob a Spirit Halloween? (X-Force #90)
Welp, I guess the entire West coast is completely demolished and will take decades to rebuild. Funny how no other comics have mentioned that… (X-Force #90)
Sorry, Jesse. Your brother is the absolute worst. (X-Force #90)
Sam Guthrie: annoying people into virtue since 1980-something. (X-Force #90)
BADDA BOOM (X-Force #90)
Aww. (X-Force #90)
NEXT TIME: Talking X-costumes with Russell Dauterman!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

As Mentioned in Episode 447 – Minor Altercation of the Mutants

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Listen to the episode here.

Welcome to the New Massachusetts Academy! (Generation X #50)
When brains collide. (Generation X #50)
The dean of students of our college used to jog naked, so, y’know, to each their own. (Generation X #50)
How, exactly, do Skin’s powers work? (Generation X #50)
Hi, Membrain. (Generation X #50)
“At least you’ll look awesome.” (Generation X #50)
Elephants: notoriously stretchy. (Generation X #50)
He may be a villain, but he’s a polite villain. (Generation X #50)
Uncle Ernest. (Generation X #50)
He’s wearing so many more shirts than usual. (Generation X #50)
Bad times for Emma. (X-Man #50)
Well, that’s not good. (X-Man #50)
The new, rather silly Gene Nation. (X-Man #50)
SERIOUSLY, HOW DO SKIN’S POWERS WORK (X-Man #50)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force vs. the New Hellions!

As Mentioned in Episode 446 – Live at the Magnetosphere

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Astra, Mistress of Fashion and Jell-O-Tech. (X-Men #86)
Zoom out – out – out – in. (X-Men #86)
We love Alan Davis’s Marrow. (X-Men #86)
Scanner knocked Xavier right out of the panel! (X-Men #86)
No memory, but a righteous beard. (X-Men #86)
Gaming chairs are getting out of hand these days. (Uncanny X-Men #367))
Just adorable. (Uncanny X-Men #367)
Forcefield protrusions? (Uncanny X-Men #367)
Ah, the age-old question: would you scissor your clone while yelling? (Uncanny X-Men #367)
Normally we don’t do this, but here: have an entire two-page spread because it’s beautiful. (X-Men #87)
Punching and drama: two great tastes that go great together! (X-Men #87)
Another Miracle of Magnetism: giving Shadowcat a bad hair day. (X-Men #87)
Jeez, his hair gets even better when he’s cosmic and naked! (X-Men #87)
In which we continue to feel really bad for Joseph. (X-Men #87)
We were harsh on this story, but its good parts are great. (X-Men #87)
Spoiler: this will go poorly. (X-Men #87)
NEXT TIME: Nate Grey meets Generation X!

Hot Damn, It’s the Whole Thing!

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With under a week to go until our 10th birthday party, we’ve decided that the time has come to reveal Colleen Coover’s J&M 10th Anniversary print in its full glory! CHECK IT OUT:
11×17″ prints will be available at the party at Books With Pictures, for $20 each. We’re doing a run of 150 and not planning on reprinting this, so if you want one, now’s a good time to get in touch with someone who’ll be at the party!

As Mentioned in Episode 445 – Dick War

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This cover, man. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Rogue’s dream bikini. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
His powers are just icky. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Please enjoy Nightcrawler’s adorable pajamas. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
That’s… that’s not Trish Tilby. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
…what… (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Magneto knows from villainous lairs. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Ferris is a cutie. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

LINKS & FURTHER ADVICE

 

As Mentioned in Episode 444 – Damnit, Magnus

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Domino: wine mom, but also good mom. (X-Force #86)
WRONG FREEZER WRONG FREEZER (X-Force #86)
Theresa Rourke Cassidy, mistress of disguise. (X-Force #86)
Remember how Moonstar’s weird new powers are always accompanied by a cosmic blue glow? This issue doesn’t, and is thus… confusing. (X-Force #86)
Odysseus Indigo, the most dapper of antagonists. (X-Force #86)
Some exceptionally efficient visual storytelling by Jim Cheung. (X-Force #86)
Christmas in March! Well, March for us. December for Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #365)
Hey, it’s that thing Miles used to draw in middle school! How’d that get there?! (Uncanny X-Men #365)
In which Colossus interrupts a very manly threesome. (Uncanny X-Men #365)
The X-Men X-Plain X-Mas. (Uncanny X-Men #365)
I mean, that’s Rusty Collins, right? (Uncanny X-Men #365)
“My favorite X-Men character? You probably haven’t heard of him.” (Uncanny X-Men #365)
Oof, my emotions… (Uncanny X-Men #365)
Aww. (Uncanny X-Men #365)
Now that is a cover. (X-Men #85)
In which the first page establishes that this story will be a Big Deal. (X-Men #85)
Sorry, Bill… today’s gonna be a rough one. (X-Men #85)
We missed Alan Davis. (X-Men #85)
Uh oh. (X-Men #85)
Heroes. (X-Men #85)
This issue uses juxtaposition perfectly. (X-Men #85)
Magneto gets the answer he wants… and then the answer he doesn’t. (X-Men #85)
NEXT TIME: The Magneto War begins.

LINKS & FURTHER FESTIVITIES

YOU’RE INVITED!

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HOT DAMN, Y’ALL. Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men is turning ten entire years old on Saturday, April 13, and you’re all invited to our birthday party–and our first live show since pre-pandemic days! We’ll be starting the day with a live show–X-Plaining a story we once swore never to cover–at Portland’s historic Clinton Street Theater. Then we’ll break for lunch and reconvene that afternoon at comic-shop extraordinaire Books With Pictures for a 10th birthday blowout, complete with cake, party favors, and some really, really cool X-clusive merch (including the 10th anniversary print by Colleen Coover that you can see a sliver of above (and which you’ve seen in its entirety if you’re a patron–remember, keep it secret, keep it safe!))!

HERE ARE THE DETAILS:

THE SHOW:

  • WHAT: Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men LIVE
  • WHEN: Saturday, April 13, 10:00-11:45 AM
  • WHERE: Clinton Street Theater, 2522 SE Clinton St., Portland, OR
  • NOTE: MASKS WILL BE MANDATORY AT THE LIVE SHOW. We’ll have ’em at the door for anyone who doesn’t bring their own.
  • ADDITIONAL DETAILS: All-ages if you don’t mind your kids learning swears.

THE PARTY:

  • WHAT: Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men’s 10th Birthday Party
  • WHEN: Saturday, April 13, 2:00-5:00 PM
  • WHERE: Books With Pictures, 1401 Division St., Portland, OR
  • NOTE: This will be an outdoor event. Plan accordingly!
  • ADDITIONAL DETAILS: All-ages, costumes encouraged, birthday cake, birthday pie, party favors, X-clusive merch

RSVP FOR ONE OR BOTH EVENTS HERE! While you’ll probably still get in if you just show up, we’d really appreciate it if you’d RSVP–it helps us plan for the events and, in case of overflow, will make it more likely that you’ll get in.

AND HERE ARE THE ANSWERS TO SOME QUESTIONS THAT WE ANTICIPATE OR HAVE ALREADY FIELDED AT LEAST ONCE:

How much are tickets?

Free.

Wait, the party and the show are both free?

Yeah.

Can I still go if I don’t RSVP?

If there’s room, sure. But we need to figure out things like how many party favors to make and how many pies to bring, so we would really appreciate it if you RSVP.

Wait, there are party favors?

Oh, yes.

Like what?

It’s a surprise. (Unless you’re a patron, in which case you’ve already gotten a sneak peek at one of ’em.)

Will you have merch for sale?

At the party, yeah: We’ll have a handful of in-person-x-clusive merch, including Colleen Coover’s completely rad 10th Anniversary print!

I will not be there, but I want a print or other swag. How can I get it?

Connect with someone who’s going and arrange for them to pick it up and send it to you. We recommend using the Discord, but you can also @ us on Bluesky and we’ll boost your signal!

Do I have to wear a mask?

To the show, yes. To the party, no.

How come?

Because accessibility.

I don’t want to.

Suck it up, buttercup.

Can I bring my kids?

If you’re okay with the possibility that they’ll hear some swears, sure!

Can I bring my horse?

We would strongly prefer that you not.

Can I wear a costume?

We encourage you to do so.

What if it’s not an X-Men costume?

You do you, buddy.

Are the X-Men really confusing enough to merit a full decade of X-planatory podcasts?

Apparently.

As Mentioned in Episode 442 – MimeQuest 64

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Listen to the episode here.

A story in four parts. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
They have fun. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
In a world of clean-lined cartoony art, Logan is craggy. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
#roasted (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Any of the X-Men could wear that map as a dress! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
(New) Girl Talk (X-Men Unlimited #22)
A well-armed mime-litia. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Patrick Gleason, master of visually engaging conversations. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
And you told your math teacher you’d never need to know this stuff in real life. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Shadowcat and Marrow miniseries now, please! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
See, it’s funny, because normally MetroCards charge you! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Space Ghost: “Dames are like mustard: they taste great on a sandwich. But when you’re not eating a sandwich… they just sit there in the fridge… on a shelf… in a jar… labeled… mustard.” (X-Men Unlimited #22)
1963! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1969! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1978! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1980 (but in the future of 2013)! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
Back to 1975! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1980 again, but not in an alternate future this time! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1982! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1985! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1999! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1993! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
Still 1993, but we had to include the Hate Goblin. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
More 1993. Doom needs a bigger vacuum cleaner. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
NEXT TIME: Miles talks X-Retail with Katie Pryde of Books With Pictures!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

As Mentioned in Episode 441 – Dracu-tastic

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Sadly, not a sequel to Banshee’s Angels. (Generation X #48)
I mean, once or twice for most of them, but that’s considered pretty healthy by X-standards. (Generation X #48)
DO NOT TRUST THAT MAN JONO (Generation X #48)
I wish I could have all my arguments while fighting Asgardian trolls. (Generation X #48)
I feel like a lot of women end up making that face at Chamber. (Generation X #48)
Fair point, Gaia, albeit one that raises a number of questions… as do all your points. (Generation X #48)
Husk’s breakup haircut, meet Maggott’s cartoon hearts. (Generation X #49)
Constantine Francis Slaughter IV, level 60 Dwarven Hunter. (Generation X #49)
It’s probably good for Iceman’s self esteem that he never really hung out with Chamber. (Generation X #49)
Emma Frost x-plains Emma Frost. (Generation X #49)
Over the next 26 issues, Adrienne Frost will proceed to ruin absolutely everything. (Generation X #49)
Better or worse than syncing with Glob Herman? (Generation X #49)
Jay cannot even with this face. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
This issue – the highly collectible first appearance of Jubilee’s bunny slippers! (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Such good horror movie staging. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Look at these awesome weirdos. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
“BAT!” (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
“It’s the Scary Vampire, Charlie Brown!” (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
And then Dracula’s ghoul gave Chamber the D. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Jubilee versus fonts. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
We’ve all been there, kid. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Chamber’s Kirby krackle! Dracula’s impossibly long bloody claws! Husk’s deathly pallor! (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Man, no one’s powers ever look as cool as when Synch uses them. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
A for effort, though. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
NEXT TIME: Victor Von Doom X-Plains the X-Men.

LINKS AND FURTHER READING

  • We talked about Dracula here and here!
  • Wet Leg probably met Dracula too.

As Mentioned in Episode 440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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Listen to the episode here.

Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (X-Men #83)
PHWOOOOOSH PKOOOM YAAIIIHEEE SWOOOOOOOOOSSS (X-Men #83)
‘Sup, demonic sperm? (X-Men #83)
From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)
What if Pinocchio but evil Colossus-bot? (X-Men #83)
The other Cerebr(o/ite) design. (X-Men #83)
Design by David Cronenberg? (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (Again again again!) (Uncanny X-Men #364)
The best version of Post. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Wolverine: vigilante relationship counselor and motivational speaker. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Eeeuuuugghhh (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Charles Xavier: the world’s most ripped telepath. (X-Men #84)
Cerebro Prime has almost completed its Pokédex! (X-Men #84)
Colossus practices his witty banter. (X-Men #84)
Oil and razor blades and cotton candy and (X-Men #84)
The Xavier Protocols are gorier than expected. (X-Men #84)
Imagine all the people (X-Men #84)
Back home and back to the status quo. (X-Men #84)
NEXT TIME: Dracula.

Links and further reading: