Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Category: As Mentioned

As Mentioned in Episode 157 – Melted to Slag

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
I’m trying to imagine the Punisher in a bunch of different man-on-the-street segments, and it’s never not funny. (Uncanny X-Men #272)
Dramatis Personae and their dramatic wigs. (Uncanny X-Men #272)
Oh, dear. (Uncanny X-Men #272)
“Also, Nightcrawler had a ghost friend briefly.” (Uncanny X-Men #272)
One of Hodge’s more pronounced Mojo moments. (Uncanny X-Men #272)
Okay, that’s legitimately impressive. (Uncanny X-Men #272)
[Insert Rocketeer reference here.] (Uncanny X-Men #272)
MIND, SPIRIT, and BODY! (Uncanny X-Men #272)
Seriously, though, how is Wolverine’s mask staying on? Discuss. (New Mutants #97)
‘Kay. (New Mutants #97)
Zowie! (New Mutants #97)
Scary Rahne is so good. (New Mutants #97)
“Topless Havok will lead us to victory!” (X-Factor #62)
Included for scale, mostly. (X-Factor #62)
Neither of you deserve her. (X-Factor #62)
Wonder Twins Powers, go! (X-Factor #62)
Damn, that’s satisfying. (X-Factor #62)
That, too. (X-Factor #62)
Spoiler: It’s the second one. (X-Factor #62)
NEXT EPISODE: Jay and Miles take a three-month hiatus. See you in August!

As Mentioned in Episode 156 – Genosha Strikes Back

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
Just in case you’ve forgotten since last week! (Uncanny X-Men #271)
Here, have some New Mutants, while we’re at it. (Uncanny X-Men #271)
The Technicolor Knight Returns! (Uncanny X-Men #271)
When even Evil!Sexy Moira has better scientific ethics than you, you’ve got some thinking to do, Moreau. (Uncanny X-Men #271)
“I mean, I know I played a central role in subjugating an entire people and subjecting them to unspeakable horrors, but sometimes I felt kinda bad about it!” (Uncanny X-Men #271)
She’s not wrong, dude. (Uncanny X-Men #271)
Awk-ward. (Uncanny X-Men #271)
Ahhh, THERE it is! (Uncanny X-Men #271)
Spoiler: Nah. (Uncanny X-Men #271)
Liefeld kick! Take a drink! (New Mutants #96)
“Also can I draw on her face with a sharpie?” (New Mutants #96)
When threatened, the wild Jubilee will fan out her tail in a display meant to intimidate predators. (New Mutants #96)
Jean’s face, tho. “Ugh, AGAIN.” (X-Factor #61)
Because we never get tired of those dramatis personae pages. (X-Factor #61)
Bogdanove’s Hodge really is the best Hodge. (X-Factor #61)
I’m pretty sure this is the first hint we’ve gotten at Cable’s mutant powers. (Based on eventually-established continuity, he should be dying of the T-O virus right now, but that wouldn’t be written in until much later.) (X-Factor #61)
These nerds. (X-Factor #61)
I wonder what’s in Xavier’s telepathically-derived files! (X-Factor #61)
That Charles Xavier keeps detailed files on which of his students want to bang each other is the least surprising thing I’ve read in my life. (X-Factor #61)
“I mean, except for the chokehold part! (X-Factor #61)
NEXT EPISODE: Revenge of the return of the X-Men!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

As Mentioned in Episode 155

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
“I HATE THIS SHIRT!” (X-Men #270)
X-Men… (X-Men #270)
…and New Mutants. (Not pictured: X-Factor.) (X-Men #270)
Look, dude, I am PRETTY SURE they have schedules in the future and you’re just being a dick. (X-Men #270)
Strong Guy FTW! (X-Men #270)
The X-Men, summed up in a single perfect panel. (X-Men #270)
“It’s impossible! Unless there was an unscrupulous redhead, or I guess if he got bored…” (X-Men #270)
Fortunately, the Genoshans were able to outfit them with strategically placed shadows and thought balloons. (New Mutants #95)
THAT’S NOT REASSURING. (New Mutants #95)
My first kiss was basically exactly like this. (New Mutants #95)
Well, then. (New Mutants #95)
The weirdly anticlimactic death of Warlock. (New Mutants #95)
In the land of Genosha… and Manhattan… and some random airstrip… and, look, they use this basic plotline a lot. (X-Factor #60)
Ah, THAT’S the Hodge we know and love! (X-Factor #60)
“Son, do you have a license for that esoteric paraphernalia?” (X-Factor #60)
Boom Boom’s dad is a jerk. (X-Factor #60)
Awwww, they’re learning! (X-Factor #60)
You’d think they’d eventually wise up and get clothes resistant to their own and each other’s powers, but, no. (X-Factor #60)
This is just delightful. (X-Factor #60)
Scott, that’s not how you–you know what? Never mind. (X-Factor #60)
I know they hadn’t been retconned to be father and son yet, but this is some great accidental foreshadowing all the same. (X-Factor #60)
NEXT EPISODE: This asshole, again.

LINKS & FURTHER READING

As Mentioned in Episode 153 – Mermaid Parade

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
These two have their moments. (Excalibur #28)
Aw. (Excalibur #28)
“I’m Brian’s significantly more fashion-forward brother.” (Excalibur #28)
…’kay. (Excalibur #28)
Well, then. (Excalibur #28)
I don’t know what you do in fights, but… (Excalibur #28)
Man, these Sweet Valley High novels are getting weird. (Excalibur #28)
The Excalibur #29 wall of shame.
Not every day. Just, y’know, most days. (Excalibur #29)
HEY, KIDS! COMICS! (Excalibur #29)
I just. Wow. (Excalibur #29)
Okay, so, that’s a pretty cool layout.
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE (Excalibur #29)
Breakfast with Excalibur is aggressively informal. (Excalibur #29)
Alysande “I knew I’d have been better off staying home and drinking” Stuart. (Excalibur #30)
Not mentioning W.H.O. here was kind of a waste. (Excalibur #30)
And then Captain Britain got his ass kicked by the elderly. (Excalibur #30)
Good dog. (Excalibur #30)
These delightful scamps! (Excalibur #30)
[Insert Second Coming joke here.] (Excalibur #31)
I really hope they never stop bringing that up, because it never stops being funny. (Excalibur #31)
Um. Can we… maybe not? (Excalibur #31)
LOOK AT THIS GOOFY TURTLE-LOOKING DUDE (Excalibur #31)
They’re about as effective as they look. (Excalibur #31)
NEXT EPISODE: Talking Iceman with Sina Grace!

As Mentioned in Episode 151 – Czars of Kung Fu

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
WELL, THEN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
“Also, we think they might be slightly evil.” (Uncanny X-Men #264)
Seriously, though, THEY ARE NEVER GOING TO MENTION THE TENTACLES AGAIN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
But can it teach aerobics? I DON’T THINK SO. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
Wolverine WWII flashbacks are usually pretty fun. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
No, YOU ship it. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Her hair is so great, though. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
How can one character be so awesome? It seems kind of unfair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Don’t fuck with Seraph. She’ll kick your ass and leave you with a blood debt to Viper. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
“Look, it was this or leather pants.” (Uncanny X-Men #268)
It’s fair to assume that whatever Jubilee is doing in the background is roughly a million times more entertaining than whatever’s going on in the A-plot. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Jim Lee cocktail dresses, topped off with Jim Lee hair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
It was REALLY HARD to not make this whole visual companion nothing but Jubilee. I hope you appreciate my restraint. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Remember that time Cap made an awkward pass at Wolverine? (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Come for the broken spine; stay for spoiling the surprise twist! (And yet, somehow, we still love this cover.) (Uncanny X-Men #269)
If I had a dollar for every day I’ve woken up like this… (Uncanny X-Men #269)
In which Jim Lee does a pretty solid Barry Windsor Smith. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
“Now put on some damn pants and fight me!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)
“But you’re… you’re so evil! And sexy!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Well, that explains a thing or two. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
It’s really not the Savage Land without a sexy montage. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Okay. This looks bad. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
It’s easy to make fun of this page, but at the same time, it’s really damn cool. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Lila Cheney: falls into the heart of a sun, comes back more stylin’ than ever! (Uncanny X-Men #269)
NEXT EPISODE: Days of Future Present!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

As Mentioned in Episode 148 – That’s So Ravens

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Bernard the Poet, you’ve changed! And we’re terrified! (X-Factor #54)
“Warren, be a good boy and you’ll get a prize after the appointment!” (X-Factor #54)
This image really shouldn’t work as well as it does. (X-Factor #54)
It’s a vampire dress! You know, for vampires! (X-Factor #54)
X-Factor in a single panel. (X-Factor #54)
Jeez, devouring people’s souls isn’t enough – you have to be all mean-girls about it too? (X-Factor #56)
The phrase ‘costume drama’ has never been quite so literal. (X-Factor #56)
Miles has never been hospitalized and is pretty sure this right here is just sort of how it goes. (X-Factor #56)
This is basically what that Azrael guy from 90s Batman was hoping to be, right? (X-Factor #56)
“We just got back from our aerobics class and didn’t have time to change. So, what’s up?” (X-Factor #56)
Suddenly, green guys! Nice work, Andy Kubert. (X-Factor #57)
I wish Crimson wore this costume more in this arc. (X-Factor #57)
Accidental bank robbery: one of Jay’s favorite tropes. Also, the whole mirror thing is drawn really nicely. (X-Factor #57)
WELL THAT’S LEGITIMATELY TERRIFYING (X-Factor #57)
“Illusion, Michael.” (X-Factor #57)
“Vampire dress, dilapidated theater, occult trappings – check. Let’s get this LARP night started!” (X-Factor #58)
Surprise, kid! Your mom’s a liar and also kidnapped! (X-Factor #58)
Man, nobody ever invites us to these parties. (X-Factor #58)
So much is happening in this panel! (X-Factor #58)
Charlotte Jones is the hero we need. (X-Factor #58)
Jeez, guys! Knock first! (X-Factor #59)
Charlotte’s mother-in-law is basically the greatest. (X-Factor #59)
“This… this is how parenting works, right?” (X-Factor #59)
God, that last panel. Perfect. (X-Factor #59)
WOOOOO SPRING BREAK (X-Factor #59)
Next time: Old Man Logan.

As Mentioned in Episode 147 – The Beginning of the End of the Beginning

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Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!
The first of many vertical two-page spreads (that could probably have just been a normal page, but hey). (New Mutants #90)
Copying and pasting artwork from The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe – work smarter, not harder! (New Mutants #90)
Just… Just talk to her, Rictor! Talk to anyone! Even the reader!(New Mutants #90)
To be fair, that’s actually pretty in-character for Sunspot. (New Mutants #90)
Okay, that’s just awesome. (New Mutants #90)
“We’ve got to save our friend! But first – pose!” (New Mutants #90)
Behold – crotches! And also a pretty cool fight. (New Mutants #91)
“Shouldn’t our parents have signed permission slips for this field trip, teach?” (New Mutants #91)
Preeeeetty sure this is the beginning of a complicated mating dance. Or just the start of date night. (New Mutants #91)
And then Cable fought robots so well that Rictor forgave him for killing his dad. (New Mutants #91)
That pretty much says it all, huh? (New Mutants #93)
Hey, Rictor got a new costume! And a lot more hair! (New Mutants #93)
“We’re from Japan! Can you tell?” (New Mutants #93)
“My god! Not another use!” (New Mutants #93)
“Why, someone who’s too awesome for backgrounds, of course!” (New Mutants #93)
Give the laxatives some time to work, guys. It’ll be okay. (New Mutants #94)
And then the 90s 90s’d us right in the 90s. (New Mutants #94)
Please note that Cannonball is stealing a key from Dragoness’s headdress in the bottom panel. With his hair, I guess? (New Mutants #94)
Okay, that’s just adorable. (New Mutants #94)
Magneto this guy ain’t.
And that was the last we ever saw of Stryfe and the MLF! (New Mutants #94)
Almost forgot the lovingly-rendered butt!
Next time: X-Factor versus psychic vampires!

As Mentioned in Episode 146 – Asshole Factor

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Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!
This Sidney Poitier movie has taken an unexpected turn. (Excalibur #25)
Chris Wozniak is not Alan Davis; but then, few are. (Excalibur #25)
Death, Death, Death, and Death. (Excalibur #25)
This cannot possibly end badly, right? (Excalibur #26)
Dark Phoenix Saga callback! (Excalibur #26)
Days of Future Past callback! We’re hitting all the classics this issue! (Excalibur #26)
The best ruse. (Excalibur #26)
“…you asshole.” (Excalibur #26)
Oh, man. Barry Windsor-Smith and Bill Sienkiewicz should draw all the reality warpers. (Excalibur #27)
Nigel is just incredibly persistently awful. (Excalibur #27)
Even odds that they’ll be legitimately intimidated by Vixen’s killer abs. (Excalibur #27)
Meanwhile in Nth Man… (Excalibur #27)
Excalibur in a nutshell. (Excalibur #27)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #27)
I appreciate the de facto citation. (Excalibur #27)
NEXT EPISODE: Yep.

 

As Mentioned in Episode 145 – Remy & ‘Ro

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Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at RedBubble, or contact David to purchase the original!
This will be important later. Much later. (Uncanny X-Men #265)
“If only there were some sort of… dangerous… room in which to train! (Uncanny X-Men #265)
Man, dig that body language. Lots of folks forget that the Orphan-Maker is a kid – not Bill Jaaska. (Uncanny X-Men #265)
The Shadow King is the worst, but his Jacob Reisz incarnation is extra-the-worst. (Uncanny X-Men #265)
“Dad, you grew a beard! Mom, you grew a OH DEAR GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT” (Uncanny X-Men #265)
When life gives you amnesia-lemons, make thievery-lemonade! (Uncanny X-Men #265)
Seriously: Extra The Worst. (Uncanny X-Men #265)
Storm commands the lightning and the storm and the wet towel right in your face! (Uncanny X-Men #266)
It’s kind of arbitrary that the Shadow King and Storm are nemeses, but damn if it doesn’t completely work. (Uncanny X-Men #266)
Hey, it’s Gambit’s first full panel! “Who is that mysterious and surprisingly colorful man?” (Uncanny X-Men #266)
Gambit’s powers used to work a little differently. Well, for one issue, anyway – the whole eyes-and-spikes thing will be mostly gone by next time. (Uncanny X-Men #266)
This, for the record, is the speech that Evil Lian Shen sees as being full of innuendo. (Uncanny X-Men #266)
I knew you’d been together for a long time, Mystique and Destiny, but I didn’t know that you were SUPER HOT. (Uncanny X-Men #266)
Any scene involving Mystique: exactly as it seems, of course. (Uncanny X-Men #266)
Suddenly, Jim Lee! (Uncanny X-Men #267)
Gambit’s too good for panel borders. (Uncanny X-Men #267)
Okay, that’s legitimately charming. (Uncanny X-Men #267)
I would read an entire series about what happens on this page. (Uncanny X-Men #267)
Ororo Munroe: badass at any age. (Uncanny X-Men #267)
Robot-suit fight! (Uncanny X-Men #267)
*triumphant wailing guitars* (Uncanny X-Men #267)
Next time: Excalibur meanders.

As Mentioned in Episode 144 – Giant-Size Special #5 (feat. Kid Apocalypse)

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Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!
Your friend is extremely agitated and saying strange things. Do you: a) call a super-scientist like Reed Richards, b) call a telepath like Jean Grey, or c) throw her in a straitjacket and hope for the best? (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Wolverine violently poses forward! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Cable as a wizard with Warlock as a wizard-staff? YES PLEASE (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
You can tell a lot about an artist by how they draw Warlock. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Oh, Doug the Peasant – you may not have your 616 counterpart’s mutant linguistic abilities or Alan Davis Hair Swoop, but at least you have… a mom who’s kind of a jerk? (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
“I mean, jeez, Richard! I could have been on the can or something! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Yeah, that’s pretty much the normal way to check how strong booze is. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Congratulations, Princess Rain! Now that you’re properly orphaned, you can start your quest – grab a wooden sword and cloth armor and get going! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Fantasy-Magneto’s outfit: not all that different from Normal-Magneto’s outfit. That reflects well on both of them. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
“You make a valid point owwwwww” (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Magnus’s text parser needs some work. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
New Mutants, Earth 616 style… (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
…and Earth 1991 style. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Andy Kubert draws a pretty kick-ass Werewolf Rahne. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Okay, I know Wolverine’s the bad guy right now, but that’s legit badass. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
This was my favorite part of Hugh Jackman’s Les Miserables. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Cable: master of witty comebacks in any reality. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Wolverine improving his catchphrase? Magnus playing Sentinel? This spread has it all! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
This is no one’s finest hour. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Wake up, punch Cable, fall back asleep. I’d call that a successful day! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Wolverine, I know you meant that to be reassuring, but it actually sounds pretty threatening. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)
Next time: this guy.

THE 2016 SUPER DOCTOR ASTRONAUT PETER CORBEAU AWARDS FOR EXCELLENCE IN X-CELLENCE

  • Best X-Writer: Dennis Hopeless
  • Best X-Artist: Alti Firmansyah
  • Best X-Colorist: David Curiel
  • Best Ongoing Series: All-New Wolverine
  • Best Miniseries: Worst X-Man Ever
  • Good Sport Award: Scott Koblish
  • Best Book Miles Wishes He Hadn’t Put Off Reading For This Long: Marjorie Liu’s X-23
  • Fun-Matters-More-Than-Good Award: X-Men: Apocalypse
  • Best Actual Wolverine Award: Jonathan the Actual Wolverine
  • Irene Adler Memorial Award for Most Anticipated Upcoming Book Or Series: Generation X
  • Cyclops Has A Good Day award: Cyclops had no good days.
  • Best Stealth X-Series: New Avengers
  • Kristafer Anka Award For Best Withering Sneer In An X-Book: Emma Frost in Inhumans vs. X-Men #1
  • Wet Noodle Award: The Noodle Incident
  • Making Lemonade Award: Inhumans vs. X-Men
  • Best Non-X Marvel Book: The Vision

CLASSIC CORBEAUS (for older X-material covered in the podcast during 2016)

  • Best Cover Ever Forever: Excalibur #4
  • Buried Treasure: Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown
  • Why-Isn’t-This-Collected Award: X-Factor: Judgment War
  • Still Crying Award: New Mutants #64
  • The Unhand That Elf Award: “Unhand that elf!”
  • Better To Reign In Hell Award: Madelyne Pryor
  • You Tried Award: Illyana Rasputin
  • ABD Award: Havok, for still not finishing his dissertation

AND

  • Still the Best Listeners of Any Podcast, Ever – You!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

  • Find Kid Apocalypse on Twitter and Bandcamp!
  • Listen to Dennis Hopeless’s original, super-secret, censored version of the Noodle Incident in the cold open of Episode 104!
  • You can hear Scott Koblish’s rap battle with Jay in the cold open to Episode 105…
  • …and his performance of Jay’s song about Summers continuity in the cold open to Episode 134!