Jay – Page 36 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

246 – Foreshadow Puppets

May 5, 2019 Jay 12 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Danielle Moonstar is not a master of disguise; the MLF are bad enough dudes to kidnap a guy who works near the president; Tempo wasn’t even supposed to be here today; Reignfire is no Magneto; we now desperately want X-Force matryoshka dolls; Feral quits the team; Henry Peter Gyrich fails to learn from experience (or anything else); small children are bad at everything; Shatterstar gets a tagline; Sam Guthrie REALLY needs a vacation; and it’s surprisingly difficult to choose a favorite resurrection.

X-PLAINED:

Cortex
The kinder, gentler Cable
Several matters related to Nicholas Cage
X-Force #27-30
Broome jaws
The Area jar
The Mutant Liberation Front
Reignfire (again)
Hardaway
A cyborg asshole
Locus
Moonstar
“Of Faith and Fable”
Foreshadow puppets
Bobby da Costa’s greatest fear
Dad jokes with Cable
X-Force’s day off
Shatterstar vs. Adam X the X-Treme
Windsong
An inevitable team-up
A Very Special Episode moment
The return of Wine Mom Domino
The return of Jean Grey’s telepathy
Our favorite resurrections

NEXT EPISODE: Sabretooth

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 245 – Natural Causes

April 28, 2019 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

I love this cover, and I love this series. (Rogue #1)

I wonder if she just kisses planes every once in a while just in case one turns out to be a Transformer. (Rogue #1)

And that’s how we deal with street harassers. (Rogue #1)

Rogue’s backstory has stayed remarkably consistent over the years, especially by X-Men standards. (Rogue #1)

Gambit’s awkward facial expressions in this series are absolutely delightful. (Rogue #1)

Oh. THIS guy. (Rogue #1)

Meanwhile in a late ’80s music video… (Rogue #1)

The Assassins’ guild has the weirdest cell phone plans. (Rogue #1)

Gambit gets a lot more interesting when you realize his flirting is largely performative. (Rogue #2)

The uncontested champions of Pairs’ Punching! (Rogue #2)

Oh, hell, yeah. (Rogue #2)

As a responsible teacher, Wolverine makes sure to brief all his students about Inverse Ninja Law. (Rogue #3)

“I WAS coming up with new cheers, but den you showed up on dat motorcycle.” (Rogue #3)

I didn’t notice this my first time through, but what the HELL is going on with Lapin’s facial hair? (Rogue #3)

Oh. Hell. Yeah. (Rogue #3)

OH HELL YEAH (Rogue #4)

Seriously, why is Cody eight years old? (Rogue #4)

NEXT EPISODE: Pointy boys, yelling!

LINKS & FURTHER ADVENTURES:

The popular perception of Juggaloes is both inaccurate and classist as hell. Don’t be that guy.
Jay is not wrong about Gambit and Johnny Castle.
Conservation of Ninjutsu (as illustrated in The Adventures of Dr. McNinja)
SERIOUSLY, DON’T PULL THE KNIFE OUT!!!!!

245 – Natural Causes

April 28, 2019 Jay 12 comments

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In which Rogue flouts air traffic regulations; Jay is very sorry for how badly he butchers Gambit’s accent; stealth is directly proportionate to how loudly you dress; Rogue and Gambit win the gold in Pairs Punchin’; Candra is a big jerk; you should ABSOLUTELY NOT remove an impaled object; Rogue busts through some tropes; and we have complicated feelings about the Ultimate universe.

X-PLAINED:

Rogue’s biological parents
Marvel New Orleans
Brood Trouble in the Big Easy
Rogue/rogue disambiguation
Rogue #1-4
Bella Donna Boudreaux
What may or may not happen if Rogue kisses a Transformer
Cody Robbins (again)
Natural causes
Supervillain funeral crashers (again)
Inverse Ninja Law (Law of Conservation of Ninjutsu)
The Bill the Pony incident
Relative culpability
Nature vs. nurture
Tante Mattie (Mattie Baptiste)
Candra’s new threads
How long it takes to drive from Westchester, NY, to Caledcott, MI
How Jay learned to love Gambit (but not to stop worrying)
Gris-Gris
Lapin
Fifolet
Punching hallucinations
Questa
Knives as superpowers
Inversions of several gendered superhero tropes
Closure
The limits of intent
Magnetos’ (sometimes) kids’ hair
Whether we’ll cover Ultimate X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: Spiky boys, yelling!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 244 – Terminal Nudity

April 21, 2019 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

You can tell he’s evil because he’s the only assassin who… wears black? (Gambit #1)

“And how is your mustache?!” (Gambit #1)

Wolverine is basically the Mary Worth of the X-Men. (Gambit #1)

…Okay, yeah, I get why he’s kind of cool. (Gambit #1)

You can tell the captions are serious business because of the fake torn edges. (Gambit #1)

It seems weird that the first thing he did was throw his coat over her. That’s weird, right? (Gambit #2)

Maybe the accents skip a generation. (Gambit #2)

They have fun. (Gambit #2)

The Tithe Collector knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men! (Gambit #2)

No, seriously, look at this Shadow-looking dude. (Gambit #2)

Fashion! (Gambit #3)

Well played. (Gambit #3)

I just really love that he changes into THIS for infiltration. (Gambit #3)

Candra got over pants centuries ago. (Gambit #3)

It’s cool that she survives and everything; but, ew. (Gambit #4)

Remy “John Constantine” LeBeau. (Gambit #3)

NEXT EPISODE: Rogue’s turn!

LINKS & FURTHER DRAMA:

Jay is writing a thing that may be relevant to your interests in the intersection of Marvel and audio.
We first encountered the T’ieves’ Guild in Episode 194 – Brood Trouble in the Big Easy.
Go watch Intacto; it’s brilliant.
The Thief of Always is basically Clive Barker in Ray Bradbury drag. It’s not going to blow your mind; but it’s a fun read.
As a gloomy ’90s teen, Jay was of course very into The Crow; which holds up surprisingly well. It can’t rain all the time!

244 – Terminal Nudity

April 21, 2019 Jay 18 comments

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In which X-Men don’t get to take vacations; Jay makes a somewhat belated announcement; sometimes Gambit is legitimately pretty cool; the assassins get a day-glo-up; The Crow holds up surprisingly well; Gambit gets exiled again; and Artie and Leech damn well better get to live happily ever after.

X-PLAINED:

Rogue and Gambit’s honeymoon
A thing that Jay is working on
Brood Trouble in the Big Easy
Bella Donna Boudreaux
Gambit #1-4
The New Orleans trilogy
“X-Ternally Yours”
The tithe collector
Things about which your mama may or may not have warned you
Dramatic captions
Candra
The Thieves’ and Assassins’ Guilds
The pact
Julian Boudreaux (again)
Henri LeBeau and his mustache
Critical nudity
Terminal nudity
Marius Boudreaux
Accent inconsistencies
Draping
Jean Luc LeBeau
Treachery most foul
(Select elements of) Gamit’s origin story
How thieves get kids
Gambit as a romantic hero
Ungrateful children of the Marvel Universe
Petite Chou
Clubbing with Gambit
Subtlety (for some value of the term)
Lifestyles of the rich and immortal
The Church of Lost Thieves
The Elixir of Life
An undersold side effect
A very lucky break
Artie and Leech’s probable adult lives
Villains we’d like to see on the X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: Rogue!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 243 – And Now We Are Five

April 14, 2019 Jay 6 comments

Listen to the episode here!

These are the episodes we mentioned, in chronological order:

And, just for kicks, here are all the episodes with songs:

Special thanks to all our patrons; to Bobby Roberts, Kyle Yount, Kurt Loyd, Matt Hunter, David Wynne, Mike Miller, Katie Proctor, Books With Pictures, The Steep & Thorny Way to Heaven, Phoenix Comics & Games, Tea Fougner, Anna Sheffey, our families, and the Mutant Revolution Discord; and to the X-Men and everyone who’s given them life over the last 56 years. Mutatis Mutandis!

243 – And Now We Are Five

April 14, 2019 Jay 19 comments

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In which we celebrate a red-letter birthday with a look back at five years of milestones, favorite moments, dubious headwear, and our own convoluted continuity!

NEXT EPISODE: It Gambit time!

You can find a full list of the episodes we mentioned here over on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 242 – Spider-Mansfield Park

April 7, 2019 Jay One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Okay, then. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

…Actually, yeah, it does kind of look like Jello. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

Flash Thompson should probably not be left in charge of children. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

These charming reprobates. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

This is also what he does when he sees someone parked illegally. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

I’m not sure exactly what is happening with Havok’s hair in this panel, but it is not okay. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

I bet JJJ smells like an ashtray, like, ALL the time. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

Spider-Man: He’s Not Phil (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #1)

“Seriously, have you MET us?” (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #2)

He looks like such a reprobate. It’s great. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #2)

“By the hoary hosts of Hearst!” (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

“In other breaking news, I have bizarrely tiny hands!” (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

Aw, poor Mirrorfacemaskperson. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

I really thought I was losing my mind briefly; but compare Havok’s hair on this page… (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

…and the subsequent page. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

It’s like a fight, right? (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

WHOOPS. (Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games #3)

NEXT EPISODE: Then…

…and now!

LINKS & FURTHER DIVERSIONS:

242 – Spider-Mansfield Park

April 7, 2019 Jay 24 comments

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In which we encounter one of comics’ greatest rarities; Spider-Man cannot actually do whatever a spider can; Flash Thompson subscribes to the X-Factor school of child endangerment; alliteration is the source of a very specific sort of powers; Spider-Man is not Phil; guilt is Spider-Man’s greatest motivator; we root for the antagonists; Guido Carosella would be an epic Twitter monster; a lot of people have hung out with the X-Men; and Glob Herman is a lovable, gross mystery.

X-PLAINED:

Spider-Man / X-Men Crossovers
Other media we have consumed recently
Spider-Man and X-Factor: Shadow Games
What a spider can do
What Spider-Man can do
Shadow Force
Hard Time
Airborne
Oversize
Firefight
Ambush
Mirrorshade
JELLO Jigglers(TM)
Journalistic alliteration
The government
A comfortable fictional jacket
How to find Flash Thompson
Many sound effects
The untimely death of Mirrorshade
Why we’re not covering the Captain Marvel movie
Glob Herman’s powers

NEXT EPISODE: Somehow we been doing this for FIVE WHOLE YEARS?!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 241 – Conducive to Moral Subversion

March 31, 2019 Jay 8 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Ouch. (X-Factor #93)

This plotline really never stops hurting. (X-Factor #93)

THE ARISTOCRATS! (X-Factor #93)

I see what you did, there. (X-Factor #93)

It is actually a pretty sharp costume once you take off all the goofy stuff. (X-Factor #93)

Hope you survive the experience! (X-Factor #93)

I feel like an evening with Lorna Dane would probably be really fun and also result in both of you being banned from several establishments. (X-Factor #94)