Jay – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 470 – Large Adult Men

December 1, 2024 Jay 2 comments

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Nipples? Spigots? Weirdly evenly spaced barnacles? You be the judge! (Cable #73)

Neither that font nor that neck is acceptable. (Cable #73)

The fonts in this book are killing me. (Cable #73)

Hug #1. (Cable #73)

Hug #2. (Cable #73)

Perspective? I hardly know ‘er! Wait. Damnit. (Cable #73)

What’s REALLY on the CD? Tell us in the comments! (Cable #73)

Caliban: Tailor of Apocalypse! (Cable #73)

The juxtaposition between the art and text in this pane is extremely funny. (Cable #73)

Quick-change! (Cable #74)

Deathbird, or possibly Warbird now. (Cable #74)

Whoops. (Cable #74)

He looks so over it. (Cable #74)

Ewwwww. (Wolverine #145)

He does look pretty rad, though. (Wolverine #145)

THAT HORSE (Wolverine #145)

Large man being large. (Wolverine #145)

The first time the new claws come out. (Wolverine #145)

NEXT EPISODE: We couldn’t put it off forever.

LINKS & FURTHER NONSENSE

For more about Wolverine, penetration, and pig masculinity, listen to Episode 420 – The Legendary House of Wolverine.

470 – Large Adult Men

December 1, 2024 Jay 9 comments

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In which Cable may or may not have been a spokesperson for AT&T; it’s impossible to draw a CD dramatically; Wolverine gets his adamantium back; Apocalypse says the thing; and we probably can’t keep putting off The Twelve forever.

X-PLAINED:

One way to dispose of a corpse
Cable #73-74
Wolverine #145
Cable (more) (again)
Poor font choice
Sarcophagus nipples
Caliban (more) (again)
Impromptu tailoring
A cliched vignette
People talking on couches
A compact disc
Unpleasant reunions
An impressive outfit
Prior generations of horsemen of Apocalypse
Wolverine (more) (again)
How Wolverine ended up a horseman of Apocalypse
Apocalypse’s aesthetic
Wolverine vs. Hulk (yet again)
Which version of Magik was on Krakoa
An X-Men pitch in the style of Spidey and his Amazing Friends

NEXT EPISODE: The Twelve begins!

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As Mentioned in Episode 469 – Killed by Death

December 1, 2024 Jay Leave a comment

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“Okay, everybody dig in!” (Uncanny X-Men #375)

And the fun begins. (Uncanny X-Men #375)

Professor Xavier is a jerk. (Uncanny X-Men #375)

“Can I touch it?” (Uncanny X-Men #375)

Jaq and Fiz. (X-Men #95)

I can’t be the only one who finds this whole scene hilarious. (X-Men #95)

Well, damn. (X-Men #95)

Ouch. (X-Men Unlimited #25)

NEXT EPISODE: Solo shenanigans!

469 – Killed by Death

November 24, 2024 Jay 3 comments

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In which the Shattering officially concludes; you can’t swoop over the phone; toddlers are engines of pure chaos; the X-Men do some processing; and we are mildly scandalized by the absence of footnotes.

X-PLAINED:

Rama-Tut
Evan Sabahnur
Uncanny X-Men #375
X-Men #95
X-Men Unlimited #25
Skrull problems
One very upsetting way to identify a traitor
Skrullverine
Fiz and Jaq
The Ally
A ruse
Death’s mask
A dramatic revelation
Processing
The unrealized potential of Spirit Halloween
Wolverine memories
Rogue’s temporary tattoos
Yet another time loop

NEXT EPISODE: We segue into solo series!

The visual companion to this episode will be up later this week.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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467 – Disorganizing Principle

November 3, 2024 Jay 3 comments

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In which Nightcrawler has a type; the Hill is a bad place to raise your kids up; Colossus introduces Marrow to art; we come out against autotrepanation; Mikhail Rasputin never learns; Destiny leaves clues from beyond the grave; and The Twelve looms.

X-PLAINED:

That one universe where Mystique raised Nightcrawler in an attic
An event in name only
Some shit that went down a while ago
The Hill (more) (again)
Uncanny X-Men #373-374
X-Men #93-94
Marrow as a child soldier
Rural Boston
Some asshole
Mikhail Rasputin (more) (again)
How to prove that you’re a god
The souls of furniture and some other things
The green psychic entity who’s been secretly controlling Mikhail Rasputin, I guess?
Ninja problems
B. Byron Biggs
Ronnie Lake
A Conspiracy
How Rogue and Destiny met
Compulsory heterosexuality
Destiny’s diaries
Prognostication vs. agenda-setting
Skrullverine’s power mimicry
How the Mannites could’ve been used in the Krakoan era

NEXT EPISODE: Secrets of Jubilee’s past!

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466 – A Rogue’s Tale, feat. Lenore Zann

October 27, 2024 Jay 3 comments

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In which Lenore Zann joins us to talk Rogue, Canadian politics, and her upcoming memoir!

Lenore’s memoir, A Rogue’s Tale, will be out November 1! You can preorder it here.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 465 – Right in the Fabric

October 20, 2024 Jay Leave a comment

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Death’s new look. (Astonishing X-Men #1)

He just really likes that snowboard, okay? Leave him alone! You’re not his real dad! (Astonishing X-Men #1)

FORESHADOWING! (Astonishing X-Men #1)

The sassiest severed head since Cameron Hodge. (Astonishing X-Men #1)

Meet the Mannite moppets! (Astonishing X-Men #1)

This Final Fantasy-looking motherfucker. (Astonishing X-Men #2)

Weird but rad. (Astonishing X-Men #2)

Sausage! (Astonishing X-Men #2)

Mind control or just psychic startle? You be the judge! (Astonishing X-Men #3)

It’s fine; he’s a Skrull. (Astonishing X-Men #3)

NEXT EPISODE: All things animated Rogue, with Lenore Zann!

465 – Right in the Fabric

October 20, 2024 Jay 11 comments

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In which “Astonishing X-Men” is something of a misnomer; Death has a good look; sometimes you just need a guy who swoops; Miles stops worrying and learns to love Nate Grey; Telekinesis is silly looking; “Wolverine” dies; and nothing really changes.

X-PLAINED:

Astonishing X-Men (miniseries)
Ambience
Nina (again)
Mannites (again)
The third-best way to get out of awkward conversations
The Hulkbuster base
Bastion (again)
Bastion’s worst nightmare
Death (a new one)
Fiddly bits
Cable’s Psimitar
Telekinetic snowboarding
Headcase
Darco
Glub
Beautiful Dreamer
Grace
Totem
Things to do with a severed head
The Changing
The (apparent) death of Wolverine
How to salvage this miniseries
Hypothetical X-crossovers

NEXT EPISODE: Lenore Zann joins us to talk all things Rogue!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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464 – The Cigarettes of Damocles

September 29, 2024 Jay 6 comments

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In which X-Force is kind of silly; that really isn’t what “quantum” means; polite and lawful are two entirely different things, and Sam Guthrie is only one of them; Selene vogues; and the Hellfire Club plays the dead girlfriend card.

X-PLAINED:

Blackheart
The Damocles Foundation (more) (again)
Lucas Bartholomew Guthrie
The difference between prisons and jails
X-Force #98-98
Whether Dr. Octopus enjoys the literary stylings of Elmore Leonard
One way to get out of prison
The Glitterbox
An unsuccessful heist
Celestial cigarettes and/or golems
Thomas and/or Tyler Zebulon and/or Zeke Guthrie
Demon Bears as urban pests
Selene, Always Voguing
Gatherers
Various evil scientists
The Sword
Junkyard life
Lenny Delmonico
Psychic rodeos
Nightmare chambers
Bat sex
An offer Sunspot can’t refuse
Hank McCoy’s villain arc
New Mutant superlatives

NEXT EPISODE: Astonishing X-Men!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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