Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Author: Miles

As Mentioned in Episode 210 – The End of Tomorrow

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
What Rogue’s wearing was actually our school uniform back in 1992! (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Scott, you chowderhead. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Do NOT invite Caliban to your wedding. Or probably to anything. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
You know, sometimes Professor Xavier really isn’t a jerk. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Professor Xavier is shot in the dark future of Earth-811… (New Mutants #18)
…and in the dark present of Earth-616. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Kids, your day is not going to get better from here. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Have we mentioned we love Jae Lee’s art? We love Jae Lee’s art. (X-Factor #84)
At karaoke, Archangel’s voice is just okay, but his performance is 10/10. (X-Factor #84)
I mean, let’s be real – that’s pretty hot. (X-Factor #84)
EVERYBODY FIGHTS EVERYBODY (X-Factor #84)
The X-Men are so good at posing in this era. (X-Factor #84)
“Dear diary: I finally said it! I said the line!” (X-Factor #84)
Man, Andy Kubert could draw someone doing their taxes and it’d look superheroic. (X-Men #14)
Except that time 16 years later when you shoot him in the head, ya doof. (X-Men #14)
Jean Grey: CGC 8.4 Scott Summers: CGC 7.2 (X-Men #14)
Not Rictor’s best pickup line… But also not his worst. (X-Men #14)
Apocalypse, you have got to turn your shower temperature down. That hot water is awful for your skin. (X-Men #14)
That’s a clove cigarette, in case you can’t tell. (X-Men #14)
X-Force: both very sympathetic and very colorful! I miss when badasses wore colors other than black. (X-Force #16)
EVERYBODY FIGHTS EVERYBODY SOME MORE (X-Force #16)
“You see, Piotr, this is how we entered every building back in our X-Factor days!” (X-Force #16)
Mister Sinister: pleased as punch. (X-Force #16)
There’s seriously nothing we can add to this. (X-Force #16)
Best not to dwell. (X-Force #16)
NEXT EPISODE: It is definitely not.

LINKS & FURTHER ADVENTURES:

As Mentioned in Episode 204 – Naughty By Nurture

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See how much is happening on this cover? Yeah, it’s got nothing on what’s inside. (Captain America Annual #4)
Jack Kirby: master of action! And of basically everything else! (Captain America Annual #4)
“Morning, Ralph.” “Morning, Sam.” (Captain America Annual #4)
Eh, I’ve lived in worse places. (Captain America Annual #4)
Drunk-at-a-Party Magneto, with Real Ranting Action (TM)! (Captain America Annual #4)
Mister Two, you are two cool looking. (Captain America Annual #4)
“Jeez, man! I could have been… magnetizing in here!” (Captain America Annual #4)
The all-new, all-different Brotherhood of Evil Mutants! Note Shocker’s weird little crab claws. (Captain America Annual #4)
DRAMATIC ZOOOOOOM! (Captain America Annual #4)
Yeah, I know we posted this as our Next Time image last time – but I really wanted to post it again. (Captain America Annual #4)
Strangely, this part didn’t come up at Magneto’s trial in Uncanny X-Men #200. (Captain America Annual #4)
Kirby-Cap does not fuck around. (Captain America Annual #4)
I mean, I like Nuanced And Morally Gray Magneto as much as the next guy, but… I miss this! (Captain America Annual #4)
Mister One died as he lived: tiny and orange. (Captain America Annual #4)
“Quick! Everybody say everybody’s names!” (Rom #17)
Bronze Age Wolverine summed up in one panel. (Rom #17)
“Silas, we brought you here today because we love you and we’re concerned about you.” (Rom #17)
Man, private schools are messed up. (Rom #17)
Diagonal art in a horizontal panel: simple, effective, and creepy. (Rom #17)
HOLY FUCKING SHIT (Rom #17)
Oh, man… I really liked that guy. Dire Wraith. Dire guy. (Rom #17)
Kitty, that kid is a) clearly younger than 15 and b) clearly a GODDAMNED DEMON (Rom #18)
The whole fight is like this – disorienting and tense. Rom may not be a horror book, exactly, but it’s close. (Rom #18)
Sal Buscema, how did you make Rom’s character design look this cool? It’s like Walter Simonson and Archangel! (Rom #18)
You’re not wrong, Kitty. (Rom #18)
“I used to head to the target range after my Maritime Law classes!” (Rom #18)
Poor Kitty. Poor everyone. (Rom #18)
Hey, it’s Limbo! No, not that one. Or that one. The other one. (Rom #18)
NEXT TIME: X-Force gets awesome!

Bill Mantlo, Rom’s writer (and the writer of lots of other awesome stuff) was struck by a car in 1992 and severely injured. If you can, please help support him.

You can hear Hub’s wit and wisdom on his podcast, Titan Up The Defense! It’s all about the Bronze Age Defenders and New Teen Titans and it’s really good!

As Mentioned in Episode 203 – The X-Man’s Burden

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Hmm. Well. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
Impressive pajamas! Ever-present shotguns! Sexy (not-quite-) dead girls! Extra-spiky Archangel Wings! Banter! This one’s got it all. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
I know you were in the Void Dimension for a while, Mikhail, but… did you forget how shirts work? (Uncanny X-Men #291)
I don’t know what it is about the astral plane being colored with highlighters that works for me, but man, does it ever. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
I go back and forth on Tom Raney’s art, but he draws a hell of a Callisto. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
This is a cool group shot and all, but PLEASE NOTE THE MORLOCK WHO IS VERY EXCITED TO EAT A ROCK. Or bash his buddy with it, I guess. But I’m pretty sure he’s eating it. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
But… the Morlocks were never trapped! Well, I guess now they’re extra not trapped. (Uncanny X-Men #291)
One of my very favorite 90s covers of all time, only improved by the confusing colorful party lights above the logo. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
In the next panel, Colossus and Bishop passionately kiss. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
I’ll give Mikhail one thing: he’s legitimately scary. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
Warren, you’ve been through a lot, but… you do know that this is the other place you were nailed to a wall in the Morlock tunnels, right? Right? (Uncanny X-Men #292)
Miles had so many nightmares about this guy 26 years ago. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
To be fair, Callisto keeps all of her clothing in pots. Storm, having played Zelda>, does not. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
Sure, Professor Xavier can be a jerk – but every once in a while, we remember why he runs the school. (Uncanny X-Men #292)
We’ve all got that family member. (Uncanny X-Men #293)
The advantage of being drawn in a 90s superhero comic is that you can do this. (Uncanny X-Men #293)
Everything about that last panel is solid gold. (Uncanny X-Men #293)
I know we say that Cannonball is the best kid or that Warlock is the best kid, but Colossus is kind of also the best kid. (Not that his judgment is necessarily all that great…) (Uncanny X-Men #293)
God, right in the heart. (Uncanny X-Men #293)
NEXT TIME: Miles and Hub talk travel back to the Bronze Age!

The rad lawyer we mentioned in the episode is Katie Lane – check out her website for all kinds of good stuff!

203 – The X-Man’s Burden

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the Morlocks used to have more agency, we have a surprising amount to say about the Rat King from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Archangel receives some exceptionally disturbing news, and 90s comics are all about finding the parts you love.

X-PLAINED:

  • Marrow’s internal organs
  • The post-Image Exodus era
  • Judging books by their covers
  • Uncanny X-Men #291-293
  • Sexy dead girls (again)
  • The Morlock leadership vacuum
  • A significant Callisto personality retcon
  • Failures of leadership due to own-death-faking
  • The magical life and magical death of the Morlock Sewer Wizard
  • Science Made Stupid
  • Storm’s claustrophobia (again)
  • MeMe, scourge of Miles’s childhood
  • 90s Jean Grey: cartoon vs comic
  • The Br’er Rabbit Technique
  • Some unfortunate and significant continuity errors
  • Professor Xavier’s impressive upper body strength
  • Mikhail Rasputin’s genuinely terrifying mutant powers
  • Bobby Drake’s potential
  • Morlock organizational techniques
  • Mikhail Rasputin’s very bad plan
  • Jean Grey’s real talk
  • The Home for Infinite Losers
  • Piotr Rasputin, tragedy collector
  • Copyright law and Fair Use
  • Queer headcanon
  • X-beards

NEXT EPISODE: Hub from Titan Up the Defense joins Miles to talk Bronze Age X-weirdness!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 202 – Rhapsody in Blue (and Gold)

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Man, that cover. (X-Factor #79)
Learning at super-speed! It doesn’t work… (X-Factor #79)
…until it does. (X-Factor #79)
Pietro Maximoff: not just a jerk, but a smart jerk. (X-Factor #79)
Only in X-Factor. (X-Factor #79)
I had the same dream! (X-Factor #79)
You got your 90s in my 90s! (Did you ever feel like a page was written and drawn especially for 10-year-old you?) (X-Factor #80)
Those Stroman crowd scenes, though. (X-Factor #80)
I’m pretty sure that’s not how you fix a broken jaw. Then again, in a universe where Jack Kirby designed most early technology, I guess all bets are off. (X-Factor #80)
And sometimes, when I’m feeling frisky… (X-Factor #80)
This is pretty much what happened the one time I tried to play a harmonica. (X-Factor #80)
Not only did the Genegineer lock Rahne into her transitional wolf form and genetically bond her to a guy she’d barely met, but he made her really bad at poker! Dammit, dude. (X-Factor #80)
“And after this fight, Archangel and I have a shopping date!” (X-Factor #80)
Yep, totally a Sam Keith design. (X-Factor #80)
There are so many ways to make Havok’s powers look cool. (X-Factor #81)
I feel pretty bad for everyone here. Well, not Pietro. (X-Factor #81)
When Guido isn’t busy referencing Murphy Brown, dude can be pretty scary. (X-Factor #81)
Most people think the ubiquity of cell phones was responsible for the death of the pay phone. Nope: it was this guy. (X-Factor #81)
Respect, man. Wait… it was all a trick? Okay, different respect.(X-Factor #81)
To be honest, I’m just including this one for Titan Up the Defense listeners. (X-Factor #81)
NEXT TIME: Man, screw you, Mikhail.

202 – Rhapsody in Blue (and Gold)

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which music is dangerous and confusing, Jamie Madrox has a weakness for femmes fatale, the term “f-holes” makes Miles turn 12, and we bid a fond farewell to Larry Stroman.

X-PLAINED:

  • That time Havok was the nexus of all realities
  • How to get to Florida, Magneto style
  • X-Factor #79-81
  • Lesser-used applications of super-speed
  • Rhapsody (Rachel Argosy)
  • Mutant late bloomers
  • The surprising convenience and safety of fictional shop windows
  • Excalibur-weird vs. X-Factor-weird
  • Tiny cellos
  • The worst kid in the neighborhood
  • A creative use of mutant powers
  • Whether Madrox creates duplicates during sex (again)
  • Astral wheat fields
  • Musical manslaughter
  • Sean Young (who is decidedly not Catwoman)
  • Hell’s Belles
  • Rahne’s World
  • Polaris’s body image issues
  • Beefiness disambiguation
  • Wolfsbane’s conditional poker face
  • Cyber (Silas Burr)
  • Strong Guy, who just works here, man
  • Alex Summers, inspiring and/or deceptive authority figure
  • Bringing back the classics (and when not to)
  • The surprisingly homogenous Multiverse

NEXT EPISODE: Mikhail Rasputin ruins everything.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

171 – Badly Punctuated Equilibrium

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which 1991 runs right into 2010, X-Factor: Endgame (and everything after it) never happened, Jay covets the hell out of Cyclops’s X-Factor: Forever jacket, Apocalypse’s alternative universe motives are actually pretty fascinating, and Miles will never call his junk Traitorous Unit.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Strucker siblings (and the Strucker siblings)
  • X-Factor Forever #1-5
  • Earth-TRN237
  • What makes a good Forever comic
  • The best jacket in the X-universe (and some other redesigns)
  • MaXimum pants
  • Ship the ship
  • The Celestial Host
  • Dan Panosian’s Smug Apocalypse
  • The Master Meld variations
  • Force versus heat (and art versus word balloons)
  • En Sabah Nur, thoughtful employer
  • Gammenon the Gatherer and honey-related implements
  • Combat (and podcasting) maneuver names
  • The Apocalypse Journal
  • Eternals versus Deviants versus Inferior, Shitty Humans
  • Slow, crappy science and adorable mutant rats
  • Mutant fertility
  • Arishem the Judge and his magic space-thumb
  • Definitive versions of characters and their relationships
  • En Sabah Nur and Your Changing Body
  • That time X-Factor threw a baby at a robot to save the world
  • DC Comics’s Hellfire Club
  • Trans X-Men
  • But no seriously that jacket

NEXT EPISODE: The Muir Island Saga, part 1

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

Jay and Miles at Rose City Comic Con 2017

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Another ROSE CITY COMIC CON? And Jay and Miles are not only post-hiatus, but actually in the same city! WHAAAAT?!

Here’s what we’ll be up to:

SATURDAY & SUNDAY ONLY:

We’ll be tabling at booth CC-07 in Artist Alley, with the incomparable Ma’at Crook. Note that we’ll be a bit more subtle this year, as we’re not actually in the convention program and won’t have our Days of Future Past wall – but you can look for the folks on the podcast’s cover image! And possibly also a big X-Men-related speech bubble!

We’ll have some awesome merch for sale, including t-shirts, zines, and buttons – including awesome new 1.5″ buttons! Plus the usual bad sketches and sharpie knuckle tats, natch.

FRIDAY AFTER HOURS:

meetup_header

OFFICIAL 2017 PARTY & MEETUP!

WHO: Us! You! Our friends! Your friends! Kid Apocalypse!

WHAT: The 2017 PDX Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men party and meetup! All-ages hangouts! Swag! Goofy photo props! Fancy drinks! Live music and assorted tomfoolery! Fighting to protect a world that hates and fears us!

WHERE: The Steep & Thorny Way to Heaven (SE 2nd Ave. between Hawthorne and Madison – See map below)

WHEN: Friday, September 8, 7:00-10:00 PM

OTHER PERTINENT DETAILS: Cosplay encouraged! Kids welcome! No con badge required!

Steep & Thorny is a private club! To get in, let the nice person at the door know that you are there for the X-Men party!

There will be a cash bar with alcoholic (adults only, with ID) and non-alcoholic (everyone) beverages! ADULTS: Please note that this is an all-ages event. If you get drunk and disorderly, we will kick your ass out.

Directions and further details at the Facebook event.

SATURDAY AT THE SHOW:

3:30 PM – THIS IS THE MUTANT REVOLUTION

  • Join us at the intersection of comics and politics for a live episode of Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men, as we discuss the mutant metaphor in modern America and why the X-Men matter more than ever!

SUNDAY AT THE SHOW:

2:30 PM – THE DEVIL’S IN THE DETAILS

  • How deep can deep reading go? Join us and the host of Titan up the Defense (the world’s greatest New Teen Titans / Defenders podcast) for a dive into obsession, continuity, and the weird treasures of Marvel’s Bronze Age!

Jay & Miles Review the X-Men, Episode 119

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Week of 4/12/2017

Week of 4/12/2017:

In which Jay and Miles talk about the future, Old Man Logan may or may not be beginning its climax, X-Men: Blue is pretty great, and Weapon X works better than it should.

REVIEWED:

  • Old Man Logan #21 (2:40)
  • * X-Men: Blue #1 (5:29)
  • Weapon X #1 (14:44)

*Pick of the Week

Filmed at Books With Pictures in Portland, OR.

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. These video reviews–and everything else here–are made possible by the support of our Patreon subscribers. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Come join us on Imzy!

Buy J&MXtX-M stuff on redbubble and Teepublic!!

154 – Leaning into the Metaphor (feat. Sina Grace)

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Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!

In which incoming Iceman writer Sina Grace joins us to talk about the coolest X-Man; Adult Bobby Drake gets the spotlight; no one looks too closely at the jokester; the mutant metaphor works both globally and personally; and we are all a little horrified by how long ago Grant Morrison’s New X-Men run happened.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Apocalypse Seed
  • What ice powers sound like
  • Ice puns and Memento-style tattoos
  • Adult coming-out stories
  • Intersectionality and representation
  • Iceman on his own
  • The most Sinister of teases
  • Cargo shorts
  • Bobby’s assorted ex-girlfriends
  • Omega-level ice powers vs. anxiety
  • Mike Carey’s X-Men
  • Bobby’s buds Cannonball and Rogue
  • Yas Northstar
  • Respecting continuity, avoiding overwhelm
  • Advice for your younger (and older) self

Find Sina Grace on Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, and Facebook!

NEXT EPISODE: The X-Tinction Agenda begins!

No visual companion this week! Check out Iceman in June!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)