Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

482 – The Mutant Gene for Murder

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In which Pete Wisdom canonically smells weird; we are inordinately entertained by a villain; everyone levels up their superpowers; and you probably shouldn’t shave the logo of your secret super team into the side of your head.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nasty Boys disambiguation
  • X-Force #106-109
  • Counter X (more) (again)
  • Shockwave (more) (again)
  • Turn-of-the-millennium cool
  • X-Force (more) (again)
  • How to dress for funerals, I guess?
  • How Pete Wisdom smells
  • Romany Wisdom (again)
  • Marcus Tsung
  • Mind bullets
  • Nightman
  • Our first audience challenge in a really long time
  • A bad nickname
  • X-Force’s new looks
  • A thing growing out of Domino’s back
  • Several enigmas shrouded in mystery
  • The worst birthday party
  • Abel, Baker, and Charlie
  • Fish
  • The Factory
  • Telepathic “voices”
  • The miracle of magnetism

NEXT EPISODE: The return of Chris Claremont!

LISTENERS! We want to hear your Marcus Tsung murder ballads! Send ‘em to [email protected] with the subject line MUTANT MURDER BALLAD, and we’ll stick ‘em on the web or play ‘em on the show!

Jay’s having a fucking ludicrous month, so the visual companion to this episode will be up later this week.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 481 – Chekhov’s Butt-Gun

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In which Adrienne Frost flirts with a corpse. (Generation X #67)
Oh man, Monet’s left sock is going to be all wet and gross for the rest of the morning… (Generation X #67)
I used to love it when the cafeteria served GReeBo C back in high school. (Generation X #67)
I think those bullies were held back a few years… like maybe 30 or so. (Generation X #67)
Just some really fun faces on this page. (Generation X #67)
NO PRETTY BOYS. (Generation X #67)
It’s like a romance comic cover exploded! (Generation X #68)
Hey, that shirt’s just painted on! (Generation X #68)
Teens are the worst, Jubilee. (Generation X #68)
“And I assure you, that’s far from the most dangerous thing in this skirt.” (Generation X #68)
Everyone reacts to bad news in their own way. Penance’s way is to stick a Mjolnir sticker to her face. (Generation X #68)
Well shit. (Generation X #68)
The snowy calm before the fiery storm. (Generation X #69)
“The Leprechauns of Cassidy Keep never gave me this much grief.” (Generation X #69)
What fighting game is this supposed to be?! And don’t say Ninja Boogie! (Generation X #69)
Effortless. (Generation X #69)
What is this, Black Friday? (Generation X #70)
Kid’s got a point, Sean. (Generation X #70)
You really feel the crush of humanity in this issue. (Generation X #70)
Everett Thomas: hero ’til the end. (Generation X #70)
Bye, Adrienne. See ya never. (Generation X #70)
Left-to-right, the answers will be: make bad decisions as part of X-Factor, become a vampire mom, have sex with Angel in the sky above Ma Guthrie, get crucified on the X-Mansion’s lawn, and find out you’re a descendent of Apocalypse. (Generation X #70)
NEXT TIME: X-Force goes Counter-X!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

481 – Chekhov’s Butt-Gun

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In which Adrienne Frost is absolutely terrible (and so was Ronald Reagan); you should not put guns in your butt; Synch deserved better; and Jay and Miles inventory their favorite dangling plot threads of the ‘90s.

X-PLAINED:

  • Several potential origins of Havok’s stupid hat
  • Generation X #67-70
  • Revolution (more) (again)
  • Shockwave (more) (again)
  • Adrienne Frost (more) (again)
  • The New Xavier School and/or Massachusetts Academy (more) (again)
  • Possible necrophilia
  • Dorm life
  • How not to draw clothing
  • Rules of entry to Jubilee’s dorm room
  • The Rich Person Store
  • How to say the word “consigliere”
  • The ‘90s
  • Blackmail
  • Limits of telepathy
  • Arson
  • Ninja Boogie
  • Panic
  • How to keep Synch safe
  • Adultification
  • Failure to keep Synch safe
  • Where to pick up to follow along with us
  • Plot threads we’d like to see picked back up

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force goes Counter-X!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 480 – Cross-Time Tattoo Parlor

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A non-dildo future. (X-Man #67)
That doesn’t seem healthy. (X-Man #67)
That really doesn’t seem healthy. (X-Man #67)
Wait, what? (X-Man #67)
It’s surprisingly hard to find a good panel of Nate’s full outfit. (X-Man #68)
Speaking of outfits, Queen Maddie knows how to dress for maximum drama! (X-Man #68)
Well, that can’t be good. (X-Man #68)
Oh, shit. (X-Man #68)
WHAT?! (X-Man #68)
This page is so cool. (X-Man #69)
Conversations with the dead. (X-Man #69)
Bad guys get the coolest cars. (X-Man #70)
Disaster averted. (X-Man #70)
Nate’s new look. (X-Man #70)
Probably for the best, really. (X-Man #70)
NEXT EPISODE: Shockwave comes to Generation X!

LINKS & FURTHER COMPLICATIONS

480 – Cross-Time Tattoo Parlor

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In which we check in on Nate Grey; yet another Madelyne Pryor is not what she seems; dead men tell tales; there are a lot of Canadians out there; and Nate gets a makeover.

X-PLAINED:

  • What happened to Nate Grey (short-term)
  • Counter X
  • Shockwave
  • Nate Grey (more) (again)
  • X-Man #67-70
  • Non-dildo futures
  • Madelyne Pryor (kind of)
  • A dubiously ethical relationship
  • The destruction of Quito, Ecuador
  • Earth-998
  • Mr. Scratch
  • Her Majesty Madelyne I, Resurrected Queen of Briton, High Protector of the Unified Commonwealths, Sacred Mistress of the Order of the Black Knights, and Absolute Empress of the North and the Breachlands (Jean Grey of Earth-9575)
  • Several other Nates Grey (particularly the Nate Grey of Earth-2098)
  • A distinctive tattoo
  • Inverted X-Men logos
  • Shamanism, kind of
  • A very nice dress
  • The Spiral / The Tree of Worlds
  • Forge of Earth-998
  • The Interscope
  • The Engine of the Gods
  • A plot twist that might have been
  • Magical brain damage
  • Dangerous Canadians
  • A complex ruse
  • A makeover
  • How best to support the comics you love
  • Some very X-Man-specific information

NEXT EPISODE: Shockwave comes to Generation X!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 479 – Nancy Drew and the Secret of Carrion Cove

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Jay’s not wrong that the buildings look like giant dildos… but at least they look like fancy dildos! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #1)
Starring: a bunch of fashionable jerks, mostly! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #1)
Not a good look when your cops look just like the cops who used to oppress you… (Magneto: Dark Seduction #1)
Magneto: Master of Magnetism and Monologues! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #1)
okay but what about the chest-skull (Magneto: Dark Seduction #1)
That floaty platform has a heated floor, blind spot monitoring, and built-in GPS. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #2)
For all your chat reaction needs! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #2)
These here comical books are lookin’ pretty comical-booky. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #2)
Magneto talks to… someone! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #2)
We just like this cover. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #3)
Everybody fights everybody! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #3)
In which dust illustrates speed and impact! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #3)
It’s like the portrait-instead-of-landscape version of widescreen storytelling! (Magneto: Dark Seduction #3)
Father of the year. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #3)
To her credit, she does have all the Kirby Krackle. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #4)
Because Mister Sinister is the hidden force behind literally everything. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #4)
Rest in Ponytail, Fabian Cortez. (Magneto: Dark Seduction #4)
“Time to conceive some other on-again, off-again offspring who suck less.” (Magneto: Dark Seduction #4)
NEXT TIME: X-Man!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING

  • That thing about the cooking show and spreader bars and Namor that Jay was talking about
  • Information and pencils from Chris Claremont and Rick Leonardi’s canceled Phoenix miniseries

479 – Nancy Drew and the Secret of Carrion Cove

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In which Genosha gets better and/or worse; Fabian Cortez is the Secretary of Betrayal; having an action figure of yourself is the path to immortality; and Hammer Bay sounds like a sex toy company.

X-PLAINED:

  • Triathlon
  • The Revolution relaunch and the six-month gap
  • Magneto: Dark Seduction #1-4
  • Erotic skyscrapers
  • Magneto (again) (forever)
  • X-Men Tijuana Bibles
  • The Genoshan Cabinet
  • Dark friendship with benefits
  • Polaris’s newfound interest in heavy metal
  • Magneto’s on-again, off-again children
  • Carrion Cove
  • Coloring symbolism and/or errors
  • Spat and Grovel (kind of)
  • Magneto’s ancestral f**k-ghost
  • Socialism!
  • Magneto’s mysterious mind-voice
  • Neal Conan
  • The Avengers of 2000
  • Kirby Krackle
  • Magneto’s smooth arc into villainy
  • Bonking
  • Human nature
  • Rachel Summers in the Body Shoppe
  • Our (lack of) coverage of solo comics

NEXT EPISODE: X-Man!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 478 – The Monologue Tube

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Alan Davis protests the death of Cyclops. (From this link)
X-teams, past to present. (At least the ones who still had comics in 2000.) (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Well, at least this time he’s leaving with someone other than those five motorcycle guys who could turn into a sixth motorcycle guy. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
It really, really isn’t. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“…why do you call yourself X-Man, anyway?” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Suddenly, the plot! (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“Sacre blue, non! Our elf ears!” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“you guys i am so mad right now you have no idea” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Toad, did you just… have that mirror with you? (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Just a really good cover. (X-Force #101)
That pacing, though. (X-Force #101)
Aww man. (X-Force #101)
We’ve all been there, kid. Well, maybe not exactly there, but like… metaphorically. (X-Force #101)
Meltdown counsels a sad child in a comic by Joseph Harris, part 2. (X-Force #101)
Doctor Wily, is that you? (X-Men #99)
“You wanna play paintball with us?” (X-Men #99)
How does a costume that looks so good when you’re blue look so silly when you’re not? (X-Men #99)
I’m not so sure about this Storm-and-Marrow-as-camp-counselors subplot, but I do love me some soap opera. (X-Men #99)
Businesspeople and bikers: the two genders. (X-Men #99)
Tentacle-guys, demons, and hulks: the three genders. (X-Men #99)
Mystique really misses that lamp. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Logan may be dying, but his eyebrows are very impressive right now. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
“Plus, they charged us like thirty bucks just to bring a carry-on!” (Uncanny X-Men #380)
The S stands for Sexy. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
We’ve all had that dream, Blob. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Bye, Alan Davis! It’s been weird but pretty fun! (Uncanny X-Men #380)
NEXT TIME: Magneto versus everybody.

478 – The Monologue Tube

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In which Alan Davis is Team Cyclops; everyone gets depowered; it’s hard to connect with kids your age when you’re a superhero; Sinister’s gotta sinister; everyone gets repowered; and the ‘90s were much more eclectic than they get credit for being.

X-PLAINED:

  • Side effects of Decimation
  • Uncanny X-Men #379-380
  • X-Force #101
  • X-Men #99
  • Cadre K
  • Summers family drama
  • The High Evolutionary (more) (again)
  • The (other) time all the mutants got depowered
  • Kevin
  • A very beautiful book
  • The ongoing mess of Genoshan politics
  • The Neo (slightly)
  • To what extent Logan’s claws are a mutant power
  • Sinister monologues
  • Herbert Evolutionary
  • The New New Men
  • The ‘90s, in general
  • What makes a Morlock

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto: Dark Seduction!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 477 – Ages of Apocalypse

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Jean Grey sums up this podcast. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
No smoking in the Skull Cave. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“Was this outfit a mistake? I’m worried this outfit was a mistake.” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
“This outfit was definitely not a mistake, sugah.” (Uncanny X-Men #379)
To be fair, not her worst costume. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Remember this for the next four chapters! ‘Cause the writers won’t. (Uncanny X-Men #379)
Don’t bring a sword to a gun- and/or Psimitar-fight. (Cable #77)
We learned that a horse helmet is called a chanfron, sometimes spelled shaffron, and that Magneto’s horse has the greatest one of all time. (Cable #77)
The literal power behind the throne. (Cable #77)
*cries in alternate timeline* (Cable #77)
We never get sick of that coloring technique. (Cable #77)
*record scratch* “You’re probably wondering how I got here…” (Wolverine #148)
“Logan, you know perfectly well that skeletons can’t drink, and even asking me is offensive and hurtful.” (Wolverine #148)
Is this issue good? That’s the wrong question. Is this issue fun? Absolutely. (Wolverine #148)
Nate Grey as Onslaught… Could this get any more 90s? (Wolverine #148)
I mean, might be an upgrade at this point. (See also: One World Under Doom, on sale now.) (Wolverine #148)
One of a very large number of excellent Phoenix costume color combinations. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
What’s Siphon’s deal? No one knows! (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Don’t think of it as losing a costume so much as gaining a robo-pterodactyl. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Hey, it’s Excalibur! Kinda! (X-Men Unlimited #26)
Know why there isn’t sound in space? Because Banshee lost his voice. (X-Men Unlimited #26)
The one we’ve been waiting for! (Uncanny X-Men #380)
That ol’ Alan Davis alchemy. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
I want to read a whole comic about them! (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Utterly charming. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
The Brotherhood of 2099! Between Magneto and Polaris, we have complete shoulder fur-coverage. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
“Everyone, blast your thing at the thing!” (Uncanny X-Men #380)
Comic book structure as comic book storytelling. (Uncanny X-Men #380)
NEXT TIME: All the mutants lose their powers!